{"collection":"scripture-revelation","full_text_available":true,"graph_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/api/page/gutenberg_16276/graph","html_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/page/gutenberg_16276","id":"gutenberg_16276","license":"Public Domain (US)","rights_basis":"gutenberg_metadata_copyright_false","source":"gutenberg","source_url":"https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/16276","summary":null,"tags":["Category: Biographies","Category: Religion/Spirituality","Christian biography","Graham, Isabella, 1742-1814"],"text":"Produced by Juliet Sutherland, Tom Roch and the Online\nDistributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net\n\n\n\n\n\n\n THE POWER OF FAITH,\n\n EXEMPLIFIED IN\n\n THE LIFE AND WRITINGS\n OF THE LATE\n MRS. ISABELLA GRAHAM.\n\n\n A NEW EDITION,\n ENRICHED BY HER NARRATIVE OF HER HUSBAND'S DEATH, AND\n OTHER SELECT CORRESPONDENCE\n\n\n The fear of the Lord is the instruction of wisdom; and before honor\nis humility. The Lord will destroy the house of the proud; but he will\n establish the border of the widow. PROV. 15:25, 33.\n\n\n PUBLISHED BY THE\n AMERICAN TRACT SOCIETY,\n 150 NASSAU STREET, NEW YORK:\n 28 CORNHILL, BOSTON.\n\n\n\n Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1843,\n by JOANNA BETHUNE, in the Clerk's Office of the District Court\n for the Southern District of New York.\n\n Copyright transferred to the American Tract Society.\n\n\n\n CONTENTS.\n\n _______________\n\n\n CHAPTER I.\n\n EARLY LIFE--RESIDENCE IN CANADA.\n\nFoundation of the excellence of her character--Birth--\n Education--Conversion--Marriage--Voyage to Quebec--\n Doddridge's Rise and Progress--Residence at Montreal and\n Fort Niagara--Sails for Antigua--1742-1772, .................. 7\n\n\n CHAPTER II.\n\n RESIDENCE AT ANTIGUA--DR. GRAHAM'S DEATH.\n\nDr. Graham called to St. Vincents--His safe return--State of\n his mind--Death of Mrs. Graham's mother--Letter\n describing the death of Dr. Graham--Kindness of Dr. H.--\n Reflections--Letters to Mrs. Grandidier and to her father--\n Departure for Scotland--1773-1775, ............................ 22\n\n\n CHAPTER III.\n\n RETURN TO SCOTLAND--SCHOOL AT EDINBURGH.\n\nPerilous voyage--Trust in God--Return to Cartside--Care of\n her father--Residence at Paisley--Depressed circumstances--\n Peace in God--Singular investment and result--School\n in Edinburgh--Friends--Benevolence to poor tradesmen--\n Dancing--Letter of Lady Glenorchy--Origin of the Society\n for the Relief of the Destitute Sick--Death and character\n of Lady Glenorchy--Letter to a daughter--Visit to\n Cartside and Paisley--Reposes all upon Christ--Removal to\n New York--Devotional exercises--1776-1789, ................... 54\n\n\n CHAPTER IV.\n\n SCHOOL IN NEW YORK--DEATH OF HER PASTOR,\n DR. JOHN MASON--LAST NEWS OF HER SON.\n\nVoyage and reception at New York--Marriage of Mrs. Stevenson--\n Anxiety for her son--He escapes a press-gang--Confidence\n in God--Sickness and death of her pastor, Dr. John Mason--\n His character--Dr. John M. Mason installed pastor--\n Devotional exercises--Letter to A.D.--Letter to her son--\n Last intelligence of him--Reflections--1789-1794, ............ 82\n\n\n CHAPTER V.\n\n DEATH OF HER DAUGHTER--FIRST MISSIONARY\n SOCIETY IN NEW YORK.\n\nMarriage of Mrs. Bethune--Death of Mrs. Stevenson--Strong\n consolation--Singular receipts and liberality--Devotional\n exercises--Anniversary of her daughter's birth and death--\n First Missionary Society in New York--Reflections--\n Acquaintance with Mrs. C---- near Boston--Letter and\n devotional exercises--1795-1797, ............................. 115\n\n\n CHAPTER VI.\n\n FORMATION OF THE WIDOWS' SOCIETY--\n CLOSE OF HER SCHOOL.\n\nRise of the Widows' Society--First monthly missionary\n prayer-meeting--Letter to a young man on joining the\n church--The Essay on Man--Marriage of Mrs. Smith--Close\n of her school--Labors for widows and the poor--Letters to\n Mrs. C.--The yellow-fever--Death of Washington--Devotional\n exercises--1797-1800, ........................................ 144\n\n\n CHAPTER VII.\n\n BENEVOLENT LABORS--MRS. HOFFMAN--\n CORRESPONDENCE.\n\nSchools and labors connected with the Widows' Society--Her\n friend Mrs. Hoffman--Anniversary of the Widows' Society--\n Visit to Boston--Want of evangelical preaching--Letters\n to Miss M---- of Boston--Letters to Mr. and Mrs. Bethune in\n Britain--Anxiety for them--Confidence in God--Church\n discipline--Dr. Mason sails for Britain--1800-1801, .......... 167\n\n\n CHAPTER VIII.\n\n JOURNAL AND LETTERS--LADIES' SCHOOL\n FOR POOR CHILDREN.\n\nDeath of a grandchild--Letters to Mr. and Mrs. Bethune in\n Britain--Death of B.--Of another grandchild--Of Pero, a\n colored man--Return of Mr. and Mrs. Bethune--Takes up her\n abode with them--Devotional exercises--Ladies' school for\n poor children--Address on its formation--Supplications for\n a revival of God's work--Labors for the suffering poor--\n Letters to Mrs. C.--Letter to the widow of her brother--\n 1801-1805, ................................................... 200\n\n\n CHAPTER IX.\n\n ORPHAN ASYLUM SOCIETY--FOREIGN MISSIONARIES.\n\nLetters--Formation and success of the Orphan Asylum--\n Inscription for Mrs. Graham and Mrs. Hoffman--Labors in the\n New York hospital and among female convicts--Miss\n Farquharson, first American missionary to foreign lands--\n Visit of Rev. Dr. Morrison and others--Letter to her\n children at the Springs--Letter to Mrs. Juliet S.--Visits\n Rockaway--Reminiscence of Elderslie--1806-1809, .............. 250\n\n\n CHAPTER X.\n\n NEW YORK BIBLE SOCIETY--ASSOCIATIONS FOR PRAYER--\n HAPPY OLD AGE.\n\nLetters--Bible Society organized--Efforts for the revival and\n extension of religion--Admissions to the communion--\n Narrow escape from drowning at Rockaway--Barrenness of\n preaching without Christ--Devotional exercises--Letters\n to Miss Van Wyck and James Todd--Happy old age--Letter to\n Mrs. C---- in affliction--Letter to Mrs. G.Y.--Prayer for\n ministers--Magdalen Society--Lancasterian school--\n 1809-1811, ................................................... 270\n\n\n CHAPTER XI.\n\n DEVOTIONAL EXERCISES AND LETTERS.\n\nIndwelling sin lamented--Day of fasting--Happiness of the\n aged Christian--Sermon in the state-prison--Happy\n reminiscences--Two grandchildren unite with the church--\n Unfaithfulness to people of the world lamented--Rich\n temporal blessings--Letter to Mrs. J.W.--Day of fasting--\n 1812-1814, ................................................... 309\n\n\n CHAPTER XII.\n\n CLOSING LABORS FOR THE POOR--SICKNESS AND DEATH.\n\nSociety for the promotion of industry among the poor--\n Sunday-school of eighty children--Love of evangelical books\n Last two weeks--Communion--Last sickness--Peaceful\n death--Character by Dr. Mason--Epitaph--1814, ................ 348\n\n\n PROVISION FOR PASSING OVER JORDAN.\n\nScripture extracts--Meditations--Poetic effusions, ............... 379\n\n\n\n\n LIFE\n\n OF\n\n MRS. ISABELLA GRAHAM.\n\n _______________\n\n\n CHAPTER I.\n\n EARLY LIFE--RESIDENCE IN CANADA.\n\n Mankind take an interest in the history of those who, like\nthemselves, have encountered the trials and discharged the duties of\nlife. Too often, however, publicity is given to the lives of men\nsplendid in acts of mighty mischief, in whom the secret exercises of\nthe heart would not bear a scrutiny. The memoirs are comparatively few\nof those engaged in the humble and useful walks of active benevolence,\nwhere the breathings of the soul would display a character much to be\nadmired, and more to be imitated.\n\n As the celebrated Dr. Buchanan has observed, that if you were to\nask certain persons in Christian countries, if they had any\nacquaintance with the _religious_ world, they would say \"they had\nnever heard there _was_ such a world;\" so, while the external\nconduct of individuals is made the subject of much critical remark,\nthe religion of the heart, the secret source of action, too frequently\nescapes unnoticed and unexplored.\n\n It is only when the career of life is closed, that the character\nis completely established. On this account memoirs of the living are,\nin few instances, read with much interest; but when the soul has\ndeparted, and the body sleeps in dust, it may prove useful to\nsurvivors to examine the principles which led their departed friend to\na life of honorable benevolence, and to a peaceful end.\n\n Such considerations as these, and the urgent request of many\nrespectable individuals, have induced the preparation of the following\nsketch of the life and writings of Mrs. ISABELLA GRAHAM, whose\ncharacter was so esteemed, and whose memory is so venerated by all who\nknew her. The evident purity of motive which impelled her to activity\nin deeds of benevolence, at once commanded love and respect, which, in\nher case peculiarly, was unalloyed with any risings of jealousy, envy,\nor distrust.\n\n Blessed with a spirit of philanthropy, with an ardent and\ngenerous mind, a sound judgment, and an excess of that sensibility\nwhich moulds the soul for friendship, a cultivated intellect and rich\nexperience, her company was eagerly sought and highly valued by old\nand young. Though happily qualified to shine in the drawing-room, her\ntime was seldom wasted there; for such a disposition of it would have\nbeen waste, contrasted with her usual employments. Her steps were not\nseen ascending the hill, of ambition, nor tracing the mazes of popular\napplause. Where the widow and the orphan wept, where the sick and the\ndying moaned, thither her footsteps hastened; and there, seen only by\nher heavenly Father, she administered to their temporal wants,\nbreathed the voice of consolation on their ear, shed the tear of\nsympathy, exhibited the truths of the gospel from the sacred volume,\nand poured out her soul for them in prayer to her Saviour and her God.\n\n In a few such deeds she rested not, nor was the story of them\nobtruded upon others, or recorded by herself. The recollection of past\nexertions was lost in her zeal to accomplish greater purposes and\ngreater good: her heart expanded with her experience, and her means\nwere too limited, the active powers of her vigorous mind too feeble,\nto fulfil the abounding desires of her soul in alleviating the\nmiseries and increasing the comforts of the poor, the destitute, and\nafflicted. To learn the latent springs of such excellence is worthy of\nresearch; they may be all summed up in this, _the religion of\nthe heart_.\n\n The extracts from Mrs. Graham's letters and devotional exercises,\nwhich constitute so large a part of the following pages, will furnish\nthe best development of her principles; and may, with the blessing of\nGod, prove useful to those who read them. In all her writings will be\nmanifested the power of _faith_, the efficiency of _grace_,\nand in them, as in her own uniform confession, Jesus will be magnified\nand self will be humbled. Her life was chiefly distinguished by her\ncontinual dependence on God, and his unceasing faithfulness and mercy\ntowards her.\n\n\n ISABELLA MARSHALL, afterwards Mrs. Graham, was born July 29,\n1742, in the shire of Lanark, in Scotland. Her grandfather was one of\nthe elders who quitted the established church with the Rev. Messrs.\nRalph and Ebenezer Erskine. She was educated in the principles of the\nchurch of Scotland. Her father and mother were both pious; indeed, her\nmother, whose maiden name was Janet Hamilton, appears, from her\nletters yet extant, to have possessed a mind of the same character as\nher daughter afterwards exhibited.\n\n Isabella was trained to an active life, as well as favored with a\nsuperior education. Her grandfather, whose dying-bed she assiduously\nattended, bequeathed her a legacy of some hundred pounds. In the use\nto which she applied this money, the soundness of her judgment was\nthus early manifested. She requested it might be appropriated to the\npurpose of procuring a thorough _education_. When ten years of\nage, she was sent to a boarding-school taught by a lady of\ndistinguished talents and piety. Often has Mrs. Graham repeated to her\nchildren the maxims of Mrs. Betty Morehead. With ardent and unwearied\nendeavors to attain mental endowments, and especially moral and\nreligious knowledge, she attended the instructions of Mrs. Morehead\nfor seven successive winters. How valuable is early instruction. With\nthe blessing of God, it is probable that this instructress laid the\nfoundation of the exertions and usefulness of her pupil in after-life.\nHow wise and how gracious are the ways of the Lord. Knowing the path\nin which he was afterwards to lead Isabella Marshall, her God was\npleased to provide her an education of a much higher kind than was\nusual in those days. Who would not trust that God, who alone can be\n_the guide of our youth_?\n\n Her father, John Marshall, farmed a paternal estate, called the\nHeads, near Hamilton. This estate he sold, and rented the estate of\nElderslie, once the habitation of Sir William Wallace. There Isabella\npassed her childhood and her youth.\n\n She had no definite recollection of the period at which her heart\nfirst _tasted that the Lord is gracious_. As far back as she\ncould remember, she took delight in pouring out her soul to God. In\nthe woods of Elderslie she selected a bush, to which she resorted in\nseasons of devotion. Under this bush she believed she was enabled to\ndevote herself to God, through faith in her Redeemer, before she had\nentered on her tenth year. To this favorite, and to her, sacred spot,\nshe would repair, when exposed to temptation or perplexed with\nchildish troubles. From thence she caused her prayers to ascend, and\nthere she found peace and consolation.\n\n Children cannot at too early a period seek the favor of the God of\nheaven. How blessed to be reared and fed by his hand, taught by his\nSpirit, and strengthened by his grace.\n\n The late Rev. Dr. Witherspoon, afterwards president of Princeton\ncollege, was at this time one of the ministers of the town of Paisley.\nIsabella sat under his ministry, and at the age of seventeen publicly\nprofessed her faith in Christ. In the year 1765 she was married to Dr.\nJohn Graham, then a practising physician in Paisley, a gentleman of\nliberal education and of respectable standing.\n\n About a year after their marriage, Dr. Graham, having been\nappointed surgeon to the 60th or royal American regiment, was ordered\nto Canada, where that corps was stationed. Mrs. Graham accompanied\nhim, and a plan was digested--with how limited a knowledge of the\nfuture will appear--for their permanent residence in America. Dr.\nGraham calculated on disposing of his commission, and purchasing a\ntract of land on the Mohawk river, where his father-in-law, Mr.\nMarshall, was to follow him. The letter subjoined gives the\ninteresting incidents of their voyage, and forms a pleasant\nintroduction to the character of Mrs. Graham at this period of\nher life.\n\n\n \"QUEBEC, August 29, 1767.\n\n \"MY DEAREST PARENTS--This is the fifth letter I have written to\nyou, although I know it is the first that can reach you. All the time\nI was at sea I kept a letter lying by me, in hope of getting it put on\nboard some vessel bound for Britain; but I have met with many\ndisappointments. We spoke several ships, but I never could get a\nletter put on board. At one time I was told the wind was too high, at\nanother that the ship was at too great a distance, and so was put off\ntill I began to understand a more substantial reason, namely, that it\nwould cost the captain rather too much trouble.\n\n \"We have now, however, got safe here, after a tedious voyage of\nnine weeks, and I will give you a short account of what happened\nduring that time.\n\n \"We sailed, as you know, from Greenock, June 10. For the first\nfive or six days we had fine weather and fair winds, and got quite\nclear of land; after this, we had nearly six weeks of most tempestuous\nweather, and the wind, except for about two days, directly against us.\nThe gentlemen after some time began to be very impatient; for my part\nI should not have cared although it had lasted twelve months. I had\nleft all that was dear to me behind, except one dear friend, that one\nwas constantly with me, and although the rest of the company in the\nship was very agreeable, yet I was the great object of his attention,\nand his invention was ever on the stretch to find amusement for me. It\nis not possible for me to say with what indulgent tenderness I was\ntreated; but though I love my husband even to extravagance, yet my\ndear friends whom I left behind have a large share of my heart. They\ndwell on my mind in the daytime; and at night, when sleep lays the\nbody aside and leaves the soul at liberty, she on the wings of\nimagination makes one skip over whole seas, and is immediately with\nthose dear friends whose absence she so much lamented during the day,\nand in an imaginary body as truly enjoys you for the time as if really\npresent with you.\n\n \"The gentlemen on board soon found reason to be thankful for the\npreservation of life, and got something very different to think of\nthan fret at the contrary winds. A leak sprung in the ship, which\nalarmed them all so much that a consultation was held among them\nwhether if any ship came near they should hail it and go on board\nwherever she was bound. I was perfectly unconcerned about the whole\nmatter, not being aware of the danger, which was kept secret from me\ntill we came on shore. I saw the men constantly pumping, but thought\nit was what they were obliged to do in every ship. After coming to\nland, on examining the ship, they found the leak to be so large that\none might put his five fingers into it; indeed, it seemed next to a\nmiracle that she kept above water; but every day of our lives may\nconvince us what dependent creatures we are. While God's merciful\nprovidence protects us we are safe, though in the midst of apparent\ndanger; should he withdraw that protection but for a moment,\ninevitable evils surround us, even when we think ourselves in\nperfect safety.\n\n \"A proof of this we had in a most distressing event, which took\nplace about six weeks after we left Greenock. The wind was in our\nfavor, the day was fine, and we were all amusing ourselves on deck in\nvarious ways, when Captain Kerr, who was standing close by us,\nstumbling backwards, fell overboard. He got above water before the\nship passed him, and called to throw him a rope, but alas, no rope was\nat hand, and before one was got the ship was out of his reach.\nImmediately they threw over a large hen-coop, but, poor man, he could\nnot swim, so he soon disappeared. The boats were put out with great\nexpedition, and in less than a quarter of an hour he was found. You\nmay believe no means were left unemployed to restore animation; but\nalas, the spirit had taken its final leave; it was no longer an\ninhabitant of earth, not the least signs of life appeared. The day\nafter, being Sunday, his body was committed to the deep, from whence\nit had been rescued the day before. Dr. Graham read in public the\nchurch of England burial service. Every one on board seemed much\naffected; I cannot tell you how much I was.\n\n \"About eight days after, we got to the Banks of Newfoundland;\nwhile there the fog was so dense we could not see forty yards in any\ndirection, and the cold was excessive, notwithstanding the season of\nthe year. There were a great many islands of ice floating on the\nwater; I saw three within twenty yards of us, much larger than the\nship. The captain said if the ship ran against any one of them, she\nwould be dashed to pieces. And here, again, my former observation\nholds good, for sure it could not be the art of man, either in the\ndark night or in the dense fog, which could protect the ship flying\nbefore the wind, through dangers so thick on every side of us. For\nseveral days and nights we saw neither sun nor stars, which distressed\nthe captain much, for he knew not where we were, and apprehending we\nwere near land, was afraid of running upon some rock; so we were\nobliged to cruise about till the atmosphere cleared.\n\n \"The sail up the river St. Lawrence is extremely pleasant. You\nknow how fond I have ever been of wood and water. This country, in\nthis respect, is quite to my taste, and could I only get half a dozen\nof those friends I could name settled down on either side of us, with\nfive hundred pounds' worth of land to give to each, I should ask no\nmore in this world.\n\n \"When we arrived, the doctor's friend Mr. Findley came on board,\ntook us on shore, and brought us to his elegant mansion. He begged we\nwould look on him as an old friend, feel perfectly at home, and remain\nwith him as long as we could. Give my love to my dear boys;* you see\nthem often, I have no doubt. Do, my dearest mamma, write me soon, and\ntell me all about them and yourself; and ever believe me, my dear\nparents, with the greatest affection,\n\n*Dr. Graham's two sons by a former marriage, who were left under the\n care of Mr. Davidson, rector of the grammar-school of Paisley.\n\n \"Your dutiful daughter,\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n In a letter a month, later, Mrs. Graham refers to the gay and\nfashionable circles to which they were introduced in Quebec, and\nmentions her visiting the beautiful falls of Montmorency; but mourns\nover the low state of religion, and the prevailing desecration of the\nSabbath. She adds:\n\n \"I have read Doddridge's Rise and Progress. I little knew what a\ntreasure Mr. Ellis put into my hand when he gave me that book. I\ncannot say it is my daily companion, but I can with truth say it is\noften so. Let my mind be in ever so giddy and thoughtless a frame, or\never so much busied in those amusements I am engaged in, it makes me\nserious, and gives my thoughts a different turn; there is scarce any\nsituation the mind can be in, but it will find something suitable\nthere. I must not, however, make remarks on the particular contents of\nit; it would occupy more paper than I have to spare. I would have you\npurchase the book; I am sure you would like it; and when you have read\nit, it will be matter of great satisfaction to you that John and I\nhave such a treasure in our possession. In it are contained every\nadvice you could give us, and cautions against the temptations which,\non account of youth, company, and the country we are in, we are\nexposed to.\"\n\n They were expecting to spend the winter in Quebec, but were\nordered to Montreal, where Jessie, her eldest daughter, was born, and\nwhere Mrs. Graham received intelligence of the death of her infant\nson, who had been left with her mother in Scotland. Further orders\nwere soon received for the doctor to join the second battalion of his\nregiment at fort Niagara, on lake Ontario; Mrs. Graham followed him,\nand they continued here in garrison for four years, during which her\nsecond and third daughters, Joanna and Isabella, were added to\nher charge.\n\n Under date of February 3, 1771, we find, from her own pen, the\nfollowing description of her occupations and enjoyments, in a letter\naddressed to her beloved mother:\n\n\n \"My two Indian girls come on very well indeed. The eldest milked\nthe cows all summer; she washes and irons all the clothes for the\nfamily, scrubs the floors, and does the most part of the kitchen work.\nThe young one's charge is the children, and some other little turns\nwhen the infant is asleep. I teach them to read and to sew when they\nhave any spare time. As for me, I find I have enough to do to\nsuperintend. You may be sure I help a little too, now and then. I make\nand mend what is necessary for the family, for I must be tailor,\nmantua-maker, and milliner.\n\n \"In the forenoon the doctor makes his rounds as usual. I generally\ntrot about till two o'clock, dress the children, order dinner, dress\nmyself, and twenty other things, which you know are necessary to be\nlooked after by the mistress of a family. After dinner I sit down to\nmy work, and we have always a book, which the doctor reads when I can\nattend; when I cannot, he reads something else.\n\n \"As I am at present the only wife in the place, we have a regular\ntea-table, and now and then a little frugal supper; for the doctor has\ncome more into my way of thinking, and does not insist upon cutting a\nfigure as much as some time ago. When alone, he reads and I work, as\nusual. He is seldom out, and never but when I am with him. We are easy\nin our circumstances, and want for nothing that is necessary; in\nshort, my ever dear parents, my life is easy and pleasant. The Lord my\nGod make it pious and useful.\n\n \"Could I place myself and family in the same circumstances, and\nevery thing go on in the same manner, within a few miles of you, I\nshould be happy for life; and were it not for this hope, which my\nheart is set upon, I could not be so, with all I have told you.\n\n \"We find the newspapers full of preparations for war; may the Lord\ndispose all hearts to peace, for I hate the sound, though it is the\nwish of the greatest number about me. There is no prospect of our\nleaving this place for a year yet. For my part I have only two reasons\nfor wishing it. The first is, I should like to be in some Christian\nsociety; the other, that I might do something towards getting home. To\nreturn to the gay world, again I have no ambition. My family here, and\nmy friends at home, engross all my attention; and when I see the one,\nand hear of the other being well, I am happy. Time never hangs heavy\non my hand; I can always find employment, and amusement too, without\nthe assistance of what go under the name of diversions.\n\n \"We have lately had several visits from a great family. The chief\nof the Seneca nation having a daughter not well, brought her to the\ndoctor to see what could be done for her; he, his squaw or lady, and\ndaughters breakfasted with us several times. I was kind, and made all\nthe court to them I could, though we could not converse but by an\ninterpreter. I made the daughters some little presents, and the doctor\nwould not be feed. Who knows but these little services may one day\nsave our scalps? There have been several threatenings of an Indian\nwar; thank God, it seems to be quite hushed again.\n\n \"War with civilized nations is nothing to war with Indians. They\nhave no mercy, nor give any quarter to man, woman, or child: all meet\nthe same fate, except where they take a liking to particular persons;\nthose they adopt as their children, and use them as such.\n\n \"The doctor joins in affectionate respects to my dear father, and\nyou, the boys, and all our dear friends. I am as much as ever, and\nwill be to my latest breath, my dear mamma, your affectionate\ndaughter,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham always considered the time she passed at Niagara as\nthe happiest of her days, considered in a temporal view. The officers\nof the regiment were amiable men, attached to each other, and the\nladies were united in the ties of friendship. The society there,\nsecluded from the world, exempt from the collision of individual and\nseparate interests, which often create so much discord in large\ncommunities, and studious to promote the happiness of each other,\nenjoyed that tranquillity and contentment which ever accompany a\ndisinterested interchange of friendly offices. But this fort being\ndetached from other settlements, the garrison were deprived of\nordinances and the public means of grace, and the life of religion in\nthe soul of Mrs. Graham sunk to a low ebb. A conscientious observance\nof the Sabbath, which throughout life she maintained, proved to her at\nNiagara as a remembrance and revival of devotional exercises. She\nwandered on those sacred days into the woods around Niagara, searched\nher Bible, communed with God and herself, and poured out her soul in\nprayer to her covenant Lord. Throughout the week, the attentions to\nher friends, her domestic comfort and employments, and the amusements\npursued in the garrison, she used to confess, occupied too much of her\ntime and of her affections.\n\n Here we behold a little society enjoying much comfort and\nhappiness in each other, yet falling short of that preeminent duty and\nsuperior blessedness of glorifying, as they ought to have done, the\nGod of heaven, who fed them by his bounty, and offered them a full and\nfree salvation in the gospel of his Son. No enjoyments nor\npossessions, however ample and acceptable, can crown the soul with\npeace and true felicity, unless accompanied with the fear and favor of\nHim who can speak pardon to the transgressor, and _shed abroad his\nlove in the hearts_ of his children; thus giving an earnest of\nspiritual and eternal blessedness along with temporal good.\n\n The commencement of the revolutionary struggle in America rendered\nit necessary, in the estimation of the British government, to order to\nanother and very diverse scene of action the sixtieth regiment,\ncomposed in a great measure of Americans.\n\n Their destination was the island of Antigua: Dr. and Mrs. Graham\nand their family, consisting of three infant daughters and two young\nIndian girls, sailed from Niagara to Oswego, and from thence, by a\npath through the woods, reached the Mohawk, which river they descended\nin batteaux to Schenectady. Here Dr. Graham left his family, and went\nto New York to complete a negotiation he had entered into for\ndisposing of his commission, to enable him to settle, as he originally\nintended, on a tract of land which it was in his power to purchase on\nthe banks of the river they had just descended. The gentleman\nproposing to purchase his commission, not being able to perfect the\narrangement in time, Dr. Graham found himself under the necessity of\nproceeding to Antigua with the regiment. Mrs. Graham on learning this,\nhurried down with her family to accompany him, although he had left it\noptional with her to remain till he should have ascertained the\nnature of the climate, and the probability of his continuing in the\nWest Indies.\n\n At New York they were treated with much kindness by the late Rev.\nDr. John Rodgers and others, especially by the family of Mr. Vanbrugh\nLivingston. With Mr. Livingston's daughter, the wife of Major Brown,\nof the sixtieth regiment, Mrs. Graham formed a very intimate\nfriendship, which continued during the life of Mrs. Brown.\n\n They embarked with the regiment, November 5, 1772, for Antigua.\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER II.\n\n RESIDENCE AT ANTIGUA--DR. GRAHAM'S DEATH.\n\n Within three weeks after their arrival at Antigua, six companies\nwere ordered to the island of St. Vincents to quell an insurrection of\nthe Caribs. The doctor accompanied them, and Mrs. Graham was called to\nthe pain of separation under circumstances more trying than she had as\nyet experienced, as the war with savages might expose him to the most\ncruel death. In these circumstances she wrote him as follows:\n\n \"ANTIGUA, January 16, 1773.\n\n \"MY DEAREST DOCTOR--This goes by Mr. W----, who sails to-morrow;\nalso a letter to Captain G----. Mr. M---- begs to be remembered to\nyou; he has been foot and hand to me since you left. My dearest\ndoctor, suffer me to put you in remembrance of what you put in the end\nof your trunk the morning you left me,* and let it not lie idle.\nRead it as the voice of God to your soul. My dearest love, I have been\ngreatly distressed for fear of your dear life; but the love I bear to\nyour soul is as superior to that of your body, as the value of one\nsurpasses the other; consequently my anxiety for its interest is\nproportioned. May heaven preserve my dearest love--lead you, guide\nyou, direct you, so can you never go wrong--protect and defend you, so\nshall you ever be safe, is the daily prayer of your affectionate wife,\n\n*Doddridge's Rise and Progress of Religion in the Soul.\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\n\n\n \"P.S. I am told that you have taken a number of prisoners. I know\nnot if you have any right to entail slavery on these poor creatures.\nIf any fall to your share, do set them at liberty.\"\n\n On the 8th of June, Mrs. Graham wrote to her mother, expressing\nher gratitude for her husband's safe return, and noticing some\ngratifying indications of the calm and peaceful state of his mind:\n\n \"You would be surprised to hear the doctor preach. He says we\nought to be thankful; we have hitherto been richly and bountifully\nprovided for; we ought not to repine, nor doubt, seeing we have the\nsame Providence to depend upon; that we ought not to set our hearts\nupon any thing in this world; being very short-sighted, we cannot know\nwhat is proper for us. Having done for the best, when we are\ndisappointed, we ought to rest satisfied that either what we wish is\nnot for our good, or it will in some future dispensation of Providence\nbe brought about another way and in a fitter time. Indeed, my dear\nmamma, in some things he is a better Christian than I am. _May God\nmake him so in every thing._\"\n\n Thus was the Lord preparing his servant for what was so soon\nto follow--not his dismission from the regiment, which he so\nardently desired, but from this world and its temptations and snares.\nMrs. Graham's prayers were answered, but \"by terrible things\nin righteousness.\"\n\n She added a request that her mother would receive her eldest\ndaughter, who, though at the early age of _five years_, she\nfeared would receive injurious influences from the corrupt state of\nsociety around her, and accordingly, not long after, sent her to\nScotland; but before her arrival, her grandmother had been called to a\nbetter world. In reference to this event Mrs. Graham wrote to her\nbereaved father as follows:\n\n \"ANTIGUA, August 21, 1773.\n\n \"MY DEAREST PAPA--The heart-rending tidings of my dear, my\ntender, my affectionate mother's death reached me yesterday. I am so\ndistressed that I can scarcely write, and no wonder, for never was\nthere such a mother. My loss is indeed great; but O, my dear, my\nafflicted father, how my heart bleeds for you. Father of mercies,\nsupport my aged parent, and enable him to place his hopes of happiness\nbeyond this transitory world, and to follow the footsteps of the\ndear departed saint till he joins her in glory, never, never more to\nbe separated.\n\n \"My dearest father, we may indeed mourn for ourselves; but she\nis happy--that is beyond all doubt. Her delight was with God while\nshe was here; her closet was a Bethel; her Bible was her heart's\ntreasure, and His people were her loved companions. She has now\njoined the innumerable company above, where she continues the same\nservices without human frailty, and the enjoyment heightened beyond\nour highest conceptions.\n\n \"O then, my dear father, be comforted; let us now try to follow\nher; let her Saviour now be ours, and then shall we be blest with\nlike consolations.\n\n \"My dearest father, I cannot tell you how much I feel for you; my\ntears will not allow me, they flow so fast that I cannot write; what\nwould I give to be with you. But these are vain words.\n\n \"The doctor, however, fully expects that next summer will bring\nhim leave to go home; then, I trust, we shall be in some fixed place\nof abode, and, my dear papa, you will come and live with us. I shall\nfeel it to be a privilege beyond what I can tell, to perform every\nservice you stand in need of, soothe your pains and comfort you under\nthe infirmities of old age.\n\n \"My dear, my worthy brother--how has that tender letter, and the\nnoble resolution he has taken, endeared him to me. It is certainly his\nindispensable duty to stay with you in your present solitary\nsituation; such a dutiful, affectionate son must be a great comfort to\nyou, and he will not lose his reward.\n\n \"I am anxious, my dearest father, to know the particulars of my\nmother's death: who attended her in her illness? was the nurse who was\nwith her a good woman? was she sensible? did she expect death? and did\nshe mention me, and leave me her blessing? My dear, dear father, tell\nme all.\n\n \"Farewell, my beloved father; may your God and Redeemer be your\nsupport and final portion, is the prayer of your affectionate\ndaughter,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n In her grief for the loss of her inestimable mother, Dr. Graham\nhad said to her that \"God might perhaps call her to a severer trial by\ntaking her husband also,\" and the warning appeared prophetic; but her\nown words best describe the emotions of her bleeding heart.\n\n\n To Miss Margaret Graham, Glasgow.\n\n \"MY DEAR SISTER--Prepare yourself for a severe shock from an\nevent that has robbed me of every earthly joy. Your amiable brother is\nno longer an inhabitant of this lower world. On the seventeenth of\nNovember he was seized with a putrid fever, which, on the\ntwenty-second, numbered him with the dead, and left me a thing not to\nbe envied by the most abject beggar that crawls from door to door.\nExpect not consolation from me: I neither can give nor take it. But\nwhy say I so? _Yes, I can._ He died as a Christian, sensible to\nthe last, and in full expectation of his approaching end. O, you knew\nnot your brother's worth; you knew him not as a husband: he was not\nthe same as when you knew him in his giddy years: he was to me all\nlove, all affection, and partial to my every fault; prudent too in\nproviding for his family. I had gained such an entire ascendency over\nhis heart as I would not have given for the crown of Britain.\n\n \"On Wednesday, at one o'clock, the seventeenth day of November,\n1773, my dear doctor was seized with a violent fever. I sent for his\nassistant, Dr. Bowie: he not being at home, Dr. Muir came, who\nprescribed an emetic in the evening, and his fever having greatly\nabated, it was accordingly given. In the morning Dr. Bowie thought him\nso well I did not ask for any other assistance. At ten o'clock his\nfever greatly increased, though not so violent as it had been the day\nbefore. He was advised to lose a little blood, which he did; and\ntowards evening it again abated.\n\n \"I found he was not quite satisfied with what had been done for\nhim; at the same time he would do nothing for himself. Thursday\nevening I begged Dr. Bowie to call in Dr. Warner's assistance,\nnotwithstanding he assured me there was not one dangerous symptom.\nFriday morning they both attended, and both pronounced him in a fair\nway of recovery.\n\n \"About three o'clock Dr. Eird came, who seemed surprised the\nthing had not been done which Dr. Graham himself had been dissatisfied\nfor the want of the day before. Soon after the medicine was sent; but\nO, my dear doctor said it was then too late. In the evening they all\nagain attended, and insisted there was no danger. Saturday morning he\nseemed very easy, and the physicians said he was in a fine way. The\nfever was gone; the decoction of bark prescribed; and they said he\nwould be able to-morrow to take it in substance. I was not now the\nleast apprehensive of danger, and was very earnest in prayer that the\nLord would sanctify his affliction, and not suffer it to go off\nwithout leaving a sensible effect on his mind. Nay, I even said in my\nheart, 'the rod is too soon removed, it will do him no good.' Oh, that\nfools will still persist to prescribe to infinite wisdom and goodness.\nI was soon severely punished.\n\n \"About eleven he took the hiccup. I did not like it, but little\nknew it was so dangerous a symptom as I afterwards understood. I sent\nfor Dr. Bowie, who assured me that though it was a disagreeable\nsymptom with other attendants, in his case it was of no more\nconsequence than if he or I were to take it. All that day it was so\nmoderate that a mouthful of any liquid stopped it, though it always\nreturned again: he often said it would be his death; but I imagined\nthe pain it gave him extorted these words from him rather than a sense\nof danger, and was much pleased to hear him often pray that the Lord\nwould give him patience and resignation to his blessed will, and still\nmore to observe that he bore it with a patience beyond what was\nnatural to him. He was of a quick temper, and being of a healthy\nconstitution, was but little accustomed to pain; but, during the whole\nof his severe and trying affliction, I do not remember to have heard a\nmurmuring word escape his lips; so that I cannot doubt but his prayers\nwere heard, and the grace prayed for bestowed. In the evening the\nhiccup increased, and all that night it was very severe, so that he\ncould not bear to be any way disturbed, nor could I possibly prevail\nupon him to take his medicine, from two in the morning until ten\no'clock, when the physicians again attended and persuaded him to\ncomply. This was Sunday. About mid-day Dr. Warner sent some old hock,\nwith orders that he should take some in his drink, and now and then a\nlittle plain. When the wine was brought in and put on the table, he\nasked me what it was. I told him. He said, 'Yes, they are now come to\nthe last shift.'\n\n \"Mr. Frank Gilbert, a good man, and, I believe, a real\nChristian, having come to town to preach--for he is a Methodist\nminister--sent a note, kindly inquiring after him, and intimating,\nif it would be agreeable to him, he would visit him in the morning.\nHe said, by all means, he should be very glad to see him. I said,\n'My love, you know I have great faith in the prayers of God's\npeople; suppose you should beg an interest in them this afternoon?'\nHe answered, 'My dear, do you think they will forget me?' I said,\n'I hope, my love, you are not ashamed to desire the prayers of the\npeople of God; it is not now a time to mind the ridicule of the\nworld.' He said, 'No, Bell, I care not a farthing for the whole\nworld, and you may make it my own request.'\n\n \"His disorder gained ground very fast that day, and I began to be\nmuch alarmed; yet still I thought it would not end in death, but\nthough severe and dangerous, was sent in answer to my repeated,\nearnest prayers to awaken in him a real concern about his eternal\ninterest, to set the world and its vanities in their true light, and\nbring about that entire change of heart which our blessed Lord styles\nthe new birth, and without which, he says, we cannot enter the kingdom\nof heaven.\n\n \"It was now become very difficult for him to speak; but by the\nmotion of his hands and eyes, which were continually lifted up when he\nhad the smallest respite, I could easily see his thoughts were fixed\non the importance of his situation; besides, many sentences and half\nsentences broke from his lips at different times, which left me\nwithout a doubt. 'Farewell,' said he, 'vain world; an idle world it\nis, nothing but shadows, and we keep chasing them as children do\nbubbles of water, till they break, and we find them nothing but air.'\n\n \"Observing this inward recollection, I seldom disturbed him. He\nwas perfectly acquainted with the truth, and believed it. The\ndoctrines of religion were often the subject of our conversation, and\nin every point of faith we entirely agreed: they only wanted to be\nfelt and applied to the heart. I remained in silence to my dear\nhusband, but not to my God: I was incessant in prayer, begging and\nbeseeching that the Lord himself would carry on what he had so\ngraciously begun--that he would every way suit himself to his\nnecessities, and give conviction or consolation, as he saw needful;\nbut when he spoke I endeavored to answer him from God's own word, as I\nwas able or assisted. Once he exclaimed, 'Draw me, and I will run\nafter thee;' at another time, 'Surely thou wilt not allow thy blessed\nSon to plead in vain for me, an obstinate sinner.' This was a degree\nof faith, and I endeavored to strengthen it. I said, 'My love, you\nknow the way to the Father, through Christ, the only Mediator. You say\nright, he cannot plead in vain; fly to him; cast yourself at his feet;\ntrust in him; hear his own invitation, 'Come unto me, all ye that\nlabor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest;' 'him that cometh\nunto me I will in no wise cast out.' At another time these words broke\nfrom his lips, 'Form me, train me, prepare me for thyself.' Here was a\nbreathing after sanctification; might not the promise be applied, 'I\nwill create a clean heart, and renew a right spirit within thee.'\n\n \"In the evening the physicians again attended, but could hardly\nget a word from him. While they sat by the bedside I went out to the\ngallery with Mrs. Grandidier; the apparent struggle she had to conceal\nher distress, the compassion and sympathy in her countenance struck\nme. I easily perceived she gave up hope, and, I began to suspect, not\nfrom her own judgment alone; she advised me to send away my children\nto a friend's house, and to send for a person who was capable of\nassisting me, it being no longer proper for me to be alone. Thus far I\nhad not allowed any person to do the least thing about him but myself,\nnor stirred from his bedside, except for a few minutes, to pour out my\nsoul into the bosom of my God. I hardly, if ever, prayed for his\nrecovery, being willing the rod should remain till it effected the\npurpose for which it was sent, and then I believed it would be\nremoved--as if the Lord was to follow exactly the rules prescribed by\nmy weak, foolish, ignorant heart.\n\n \"Hitherto I had suffered little, believing all to be the answer\nto my prayers; but I had not seriously thought of parting with him. I\nwas now truly alarmed, and determined to know, as far as appearances\nwent, the worst. Accordingly I stopped Dr. Bowie on the gallery: 'Tell\nme, doctor,' said I, 'what have I to expect? It is cruel to flatter\nme: if you give me some warning, and prepare me, I may perhaps be able\nto support it; but if you suffer it to come upon me all at once, I\nshall certainly sink under the shock.' He was silent for some time,\nand then replied, 'I am really at a loss how to answer you.' I said,\n'I will answer for you, there is no hope.' He said, 'God forbid--he is\nin great danger; but still there is hope; and if you value his life,\nbe calm.' I was composed. Strange composure; I neither cried nor\ncomplained; tears were denied a passage; I was fixed and dumb like a\nstatue. Can I, or any one else, describe my situation, or what I felt\nat that moment? It was urged of what consequence it was that I should\nbe composed, that I might be able to do my duty to him, as no one\ncould supply my place to his satisfaction, and perhaps even now he\nmight be in want of me. I returned to my post, which was, except when\ndoing some necessary office about him, generally on my knees by his\nbedside, partly that I might not lose the least whisper that came from\nhis lips, and partly because it is my favorite posture for prayer,\nfrom which I could not cease, no, not for one minute.\n\n \"There were different medicines prescribed for that night, some\nin case that others proved too strong for his stomach, others in case\nof the increase of the hiccup. I found my head confused and my memory\nincapable of retaining the variety of directions given. I therefore\naccepted of the offer of a friend of his to sit up with us that night,\nwhom I begged to pay particular attention to the directions, and to\nwatch the proper times the medicines were to be given. This he did\nwith great care, and my dear doctor was very pliable in taking them as\nthey were offered. As for me I was so deeply engaged with the concerns\nof his soul, I was unfit for any thing else.\n\n \"After Dr. Bowie let me know the danger he was in, I sent a\nletter to Mr. Gilbert, begging he would not delay his visit till\nmorning, as perhaps by that time he might not be able to speak to him.\nAccordingly he came; he asked him how he did; he answered, 'Very ill;'\nhe asked him the situation of his mind; he answered, 'Entirely\nresigned to the divine will;' he asked him what hopes he had; he said,\n'his hope was in the mercy of God, through Christ;' Mr. Gilbert said,\n'You have no dependence on any thing besides?' he said, 'No, no, I\nhave nothing else to depend upon.' Then the doctor desired him to\npray, but at the same time to be short, as he had but short intervals\nfrom the hiccup. After prayer, Mr. Gilbert told me it seemed difficult\nfor him to speak, and he did not think it would be prudent to say\nmore; that he would call again in the morning.\n\n \"Monday morning he was greatly weakened, having had little rest\nall night from the severity of the hiccup. At ten o'clock the\nphysicians again attended; but I could easily perceive they had but\nsmall hopes. My doctor asked Dr. Warner if he thought it would be long\nbefore he would be at rest, who said his pulse was still strong. He\nsaid, 'It is a hard thing to die!\" Mrs. Brannan came to spend the day\nwith us, one of the Methodist society, and Mr. McNab, whom my doctor\ndesired to pray with him, which he did. All this day he said little,\nbut still continued in inward prayer, as was visible by the motions of\nhis hands and eyes; he had many agonizing struggles, and often\nexclaimed, 'Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.' 'Blessed Jesus, come and\nreceive me to thyself--come--come--blessed Jesus, come!' Once, after a\nlong struggle, he exclaimed, 'Release me, O release me, and let me fly\nto the bosom of my Father!' All this time I never parted from his\nbedside but a few minutes to give my soul a freer vent at the throne\nof grace. I never prayed for life, but that he might be washed,\nsanctified, and have all God's salvation completed in his soul, and be\nreceived into the arms of his mercy. I also had been, and still was,\nvery importunate that God would give me some token, some assurance\nthat he would save his soul, and give him an abundant entrance into\nthe kingdom of his glory; and, by all that I had heard, seen, and\nfelt, I was now satisfied that the most merciful God had sealed his\npardon for Jesus' sake; and I found myself ready, dearly as I loved\nhim, to resign him into the hands of divine mercy; but still I\nbreathed after some further manifestation.\n\n \"In the evening Dr. Galloway, an old acquaintance, arrived from\nthe island of Dominico, and hearing of his friend's illness, came\nimmediately to visit him. When my doctor heard his voice only whisper\nhow he was, he said, 'I hear Galloway's voice,' and stretched out his\nhand; so fully had he his senses to the last. Upon their feeling his\npulse, he asked if they thought he would be long in dying. Dr. Eird\nreplied, 'You must not talk of dying, but of living; you are stronger\nthan when I was here this morning, and I have seen many worse recover.\nDo, do be advised, take your medicine, and try for life.' These words\nbrought a gleam of hope to my despairing soul, and what had been\ndenied me for twenty-four hours, a flood of tears, and I was greatly\nrelieved. I went out to the gallery and gave a free vent to my\nbursting heart. I now also begged the Lord for his life, and said in\nmy heart, should he now be restored, how doubly blessed would he be,\nhealed in soul and body. I returned to his bedside and thus addressed\nmy beloved: 'My dearest life, the doctors still have hopes, and we\nknow nothing is impossible with God. Who knows what further service he\nmay have for you in this world; or whether he may not give you to my\nprayers, and restore you to your Bell and family? God works by means;\nO be persuaded to take every thing prescribed, and pray to God for the\nblessing; devote your future life to his service, and, for poor Bell's\nsake, offer up a petition for life.' He did not interrupt me, but\nanswered, 'Disengage yourself, Bell, disengage yourself from me. I\nwant to lift up my soul to God, and bless him for Jesus Christ.'\n\n \"Dr. Galloway was determined to stay with him all night, and see\nhim take his medicine. Some time after, he had a severe attack of\nhiccup, and said to Dr. Galloway, 'I hope you are now convinced.' He\nsaid, 'Of what?' My doctor said, 'That dissolution is near.' A little\nafter, he said, 'Who died for all?' and again repeated, 'Who died for\nall?' I was forbid to speak to him, as rest was so much wanted, so I\nanswered, 'Christ, my love; but give up your soul to God, and try to\nshut your weary eyes, and get a little rest for your body;' and so he\ndid, and got a little sleep. All that night he did every thing he was\ndesired, but would drink nothing but cold water, which had been\nallowed him; the wine he would not touch. His disorder increased so\nfast that Dr. Galloway, about five in the morning, said to me, 'I may\ngo home--I can be of no service, and I cannot stand it.' I said, 'I\nsuppose I need not disturb him any more with medicine.' He said, 'No,\nyou may give him what he calls for.' Now, my God, all is over; I\nresign him up to thee. Only one parting word--something yet I require,\nto assure my heart that thou wilt receive his soul. Some time after he\nlaid his hand upon Mrs. Brannan's lap and made a sign to her;\nafterwards he made a sign to me, who was at the back of the bed, to\ncome round. Mrs. Brannan thought he wanted her to retire, which she\ndid. He looked after her. I said, 'My love, she thinks you want to say\nsomething to me; can you speak?' He said, 'Join--pray,' which we did.\nHe spoke no more for some time, only, 'Come, sweet Jesus,' and\nfrequently, 'Receive my spirit.' These words were given for my sake. I\ncried, 'I am satisfied, Lord, and I yield him up to thee with all my\nheart; thou hast given me all my asking. I will not be longer\nfaithless, but believing. Continue to support his departing soul, and\nlet the enemy find nothing in him.'\n\n \"The next attack of hiccup laid him back speechless, and I\nbelieve senseless in the last parting work: he had no further\nstruggle, nor need of any person to support him. I therefore again\nplaced myself on my knees by his bedside, determined not to quit the\nposture till his soul had entered its rest; but nature was worn out,\nand though I swallowed hartshorn and water in great quantities, I was\nso overcome that I was obliged to lie down at the back of the bed to\nsave me from fainting. Three hours did he continue in this last work\nof the heart. I watched his last, and delivered him up with a hearty\nprayer and a full assurance; but O, how earnestly I wished to go with\nhim! I was, for the time, entirely insensible to my own loss: my soul\npursued him into the invisible world, and for the time cordially\nrejoiced with the Spirit. I thought I saw the angel band ready to\nreceive him, among whom stood my dear mother, the first to bid him\nwelcome to the regions of bliss.\n\n \"I was then desired to leave the room, which I did, saying, 'My\ndoctor is gone. I have accompanied him to the gates of heaven: he is\nsafely landed; that is now not him that lies there. You, nurse, will\nsee it decently dressed; then I may again be permitted to take another\nparting kiss.' So, embracing the precious clay, I went into the\nparlor. Some friends came in to see me. My composure they could not\naccount for: our sincere and tender regard for each other was too well\nknown to allow them to impute it to indifference. My distress at\nparting with him, even for a couple of months, when he went to St.\nVincent, and dejection of spirit the whole time till his return, left\nthem as little room to impute it to want of sensibility: at last they\nimagined that I was stupefied with grief and fatigue; but they little\nknew that at that hour I rejoiced; indeed I told them, but I suppose\nwas not believed. I was asked if I had any thing particular to say\nrespecting the funeral. I said, 'Nothing--my charge is gone to rest; I\nwould leave it to them.' It was then proposed to bury next day at ten\no'clock. I said that was very early; they answered, by that time I\nwould be satisfied it was not too early.\n\n \"In the evening I returned to our bed-chamber to take a last\nfarewell of the dear remains. The countenance was so very pleasant I\nthought there was even something heavenly, and could not help saying,\n'You smile upon me, my love; surely the delightful prospect opening on\nthe parting soul left that benign smile on its companion the body.' I\nthought I could have stood and gazed for ever; but for fear of\nrelapsing into immoderate grief, I withdrew after a parting embrace,\nand with an intention not to ask for another, lest a change in his\ncountenance might shake my peace; for Oh, we are weak, and at certain\ntimes not subject to reason. I went to bed purely to get alone, for I\nhad little expectation of sleep; but I was mistaken; nature was fairly\novercome with watching and fatigue. I dropped asleep, and for a few\nhours forgot my woes; but Oh; the pangs I felt on my first awaking. I\ncould not for some time believe it true that I was indeed a widow, and\nthat I had lost my heart's treasure--my all I held dear on earth. It\nwas long before day. I was in no danger of closing my eyes again, for\nI was at that time abandoned to despair, till recollection and the\nsame considerations which at first supported me brought me a little to\nmyself. I considered, I wept for one that wept no more; that all my\nfears for his eternal happiness were now over, and he beyond the reach\nof being lost; neither was he lost to me, but added to my heavenly\ntreasure, more securely mine than ever. Those snares and temptations\narising from the corrupt customs of a degenerate age, which had so\noften caused my fears, could never reach him there. The better, dearer\nhalf of myself was now secure beyond the possibility of falling, and\nwaiting my arrival to complete his bliss. O happy hour, which shall\nalso set my soul at liberty, and unite us, never to part more.\n\n \"In the morning I asked the nurse if there was any alteration;\nshe said, no. I again returned to take another view, and was surprised\nto find his color and countenance unchanged. I began to be extremely\nuneasy at having consented to so early a burial. I returned again, and\nagain; O, how I wished to have kept him for ever. Ten o'clock came;\nthe company assembled; I became very uneasy; at last I discovered it\nto Dr. Bowie, begged he would only view him; how fresh the color--how\nevery way like life. He assured me there was not the smallest doubt\nbut that he was gone. I was not satisfied with this, but made them all\ninspect him. All agreed in the same thing, and I was obliged to yield,\nand the dear remains were ravished from my sight. What a night I\npassed the night after the funeral! I had ordered our own bed to be\nmade up, and at the usual time retired; but in vain did I try to\nsleep; the moment my senses began to lose sensibility, I was in a kind\nof dream. Finding myself alone, I imagined he was out at supper,\nthough he seldom was without me; now I thought I heard his foot on the\nstairs, and started up to listen if it were he, and to bid him\nwelcome, when my roused senses told me what I could still hardly\ncredit, that I had no husband to expect, and threw me into a fresh\nagony, which kept me awake till I had in some measure again reconciled\nmyself to my solitary situation. But having only slept a few hours\nsince my dear doctor was taken ill, I no sooner got my mind a little\ncomposed, than sleep again began to overpower my senses, when the\nsame, or a similar imagination roused me.\n\n \"The morning came. When I was called down to breakfast, the sight\nof his empty seat distracted me. I returned to my room, though I\nthought it my duty to take some nourishment. I had it brought to me.\nAlas, I could nowhere turn my eyes but the sight was connected with\nthis dear idea, and recalled past delights, never more to return. Our\nback windows looked into the garden, on which he had bestowed so much\nlabor and pains, and which he was just bringing to perfection. Here we\nhad spent many pleasant hours together, and indulged that freedom of\nconversation, the natural consequence of an unbounded confidence. The\ndouble arbor he had reared, and so contrived as to screen from both\nthe south and the western sun, bid fair, in a short time, to screen us\nalso from every eye. Hitherto we had been confined to morning hours,\nor afternoon, when it was shaded by the house; but had often pleased\nourselves with the hours we should spend in this cool retreat, even at\nnoonday, while, screened from the sun's scorching rays, we might enjoy\nthe refreshing breeze through its leafy openings; but these delightful\nprospects were now for ever at an end. I might, indeed, there take my\nseat; but the tongue which everywhere charmed, was buried in deepest\nsilence. The company which rendered every scene pleasant was gone,\nnever to return: his sheep, his goats, nay, even the poultry, were\noften fed from his hand: every thing served to distract. As for my\nchildren, they were by kind friends kept for some time out of my\nsight; for not only to view them fatherless distressed me, but their\nthoughtless mirth and play was altogether insupportable.\n\n \"I accepted an invitation from Mr. Gilbert's family to spend some\ntime in the country with them; for though it was impossible for me to\nforget for one moment, yet, when these objects were removed from my\nsight, I was more able to turn my thoughts upward, to where my heart's\ntreasure now is, and where I myself expect to be. We had two\nmen-servants, and my two Indian girls; one of the men I dismissed, the\nother I left to take care of the living creatures about the place. One\nof my girls I boarded where she would be in good company, and with my\nchildren and their maid I abandoned my solitary dwelling. I met with a\nvery tender reception from that worthy family. My situation here was\nsuch as I both expected and wished, and attended with many outward\ncircumstances which had the probability of making it supportable. I\nwas allowed to be as much by myself as I chose. No one intruded on my\nprivacy without my consent; but one or other of the Mrs. Gilberts\noften visited me in my own room, and drew from my bursting heart all\nits griefs, sympathizing, soothing, and advising at the same time.\nThey are both women of great piety, having for many years devoted\ntheir hearts, time, talents, and fortune to the service of God; and\ntheir two husbands likewise, whose business it has been to instruct\nthe ignorant negroes without fee or reward. Had it not been for this\nfamily, I know not where the distraction of my mind might have\nended.\" * * * *\n\n\n Thus was Mrs. Graham, at the early age of thirty-one, left a\nwidow in a land of strangers. Her husband, companion, protector, was\ngone: a man of superior mind, great taste, warm affection, and\ndomestic habits. She was left with three daughters, the eldest of whom\nwas not over five years of age, and expecting an increase of her\ninfant charge. Of temporal property she possessed very little: she was\nat a distance from her father's house: the widow and the fatherless\nwere in a foreign land. The change in her circumstances was as sudden\nas it was great.\n\n That sympathizing heart with which she was accustomed to receive\nand return the confidence of unbounded friendship, and thus, by\nreciprocal communion, to alleviate the trials and enrich the\nenjoyments of life, was chilled in death. All the pleasing plans, all\nthe cherished prospects of future settlement in life were cut off in a\nmoment. While sinking into a softened indifference to the world, in\nthe contemplation of her severe loss, she was, on the other hand,\nroused into exertion for the sustenance and support of her young\nfamily, whose earthly dependence was now necessarily upon her.\n\n Not satisfied with the custom of the island, in burying so soon\nafter life is extinct, her uneasiness became so great that her friends\njudged it prudent to have her husband's grave opened, to convince her\nthat no symptoms of returning life had been exhibited there. The\nfidelity of her heart was now as strongly marked as her tenderness.\nShe dressed herself in the habiliments of a widow, and determined\nnever to lay them aside. This she strictly adhered to, and rejected\nevery overture afterwards made to her of again entering into the\nmarried state. She breathed the feelings of her heart in a little\npoem, in which she dedicated herself to her God as a widow indeed.\n\n On examining into the state of her husband's affairs, she\ndiscovered that there remained not quite two hundred pounds sterling\nin his agent's hands.\n\n These circumstances afforded an opportunity for the display of\nthe purity of Mrs. Graham's principles, and her rigid adherence to the\ncommandments of her God in every situation.\n\n It was proposed to her, and urged with much argument, to sell the\ntwo Indian girls, her late husband's property; but no considerations\nof interest or necessity could prevail upon her thus to dispose of\nimmortal beings, the work of her heavenly Father's hand. One of these\ngirls accompanied her to Scotland, where she was married; and the\nother died in Antigua, leaving an affectionate testimony to the\nkindness of her dear master and mistress.\n\n The surgeon's mate of the regiment was a young man whom Dr.\nGraham had early taken under his patronage. The kindness of his patron\nhad so far favored him with a medical education, that he was enabled\nto succeed him as surgeon to the regiment.\n\n Notwithstanding the slender finances of Mrs. Graham, feeling for\nthe situation of Dr. H----, she presented to him her husband's medical\nlibrary and his sword: a rare instance of disinterested regard for the\nwelfare of another.\n\n This was an effort towards observing the second table of the law,\nin doing which she was actuated likewise by that principle which flows\nfrom keeping the first table also. Nor was the friendship of Dr. and\nMrs. Graham misplaced. The seeds of gratitude were sown in an upright\nheart. Dr. H----, from year to year, manifested his sense of\nobligation, by remitting to the widow such sums of money as he could\nafford. This was a reciprocity of kind offices, equally honorable to\nthe benefactors and to them who received the benefit: an instance,\nalas, too rarely met with in a selfish world.\n\n It may here be remarked, in order to show how much temporal\nsupplies are under the direction of a special providence, that Dr.\nH----'s remittances and friendly letters were occasionally received by\nMrs. Graham until the year 1795; after this period her circumstances\nwere so favorably altered as to render such aid unnecessary; and from\nthat time she heard no more from Dr. H----, neither could she learn\nwhat was his subsequent history.\n\n It may be profitable here to look at Mrs. Graham, contrasted with\nthose around her whose condition in the world was prosperous. Many\npersons then in Antigua were busy and successful in the accumulation\nof wealth, to the exclusion of every thought tending to holiness, to\nGod, and to heaven. The portion which they desired they possessed.\nWhat then? They are since gone to another world. The magic of the\nwords, \"my property,\" \"an independent fortune,\" has been dispelled;\nand that for which they toiled, and in which they gloried, has since\npassed into a hundred hands; the illusion is vanished, and unless they\nmade their peace with God through the blood of the cross, they left\nthis world, and alas, found no heaven before them. But amidst apparent\naffliction and outward distress, God was preparing the heart of this\nwidow, by the discipline of his covenant, for future usefulness--to be\na blessing, probably to thousands of her race, and to enter finally on\nthat \"rest which remaineth for the people of God.\"\n\n Her temporal support was not, in her esteem, \"an independent\nfortune,\" but a life of dependence on the care of her heavenly Father:\nshe had more delight in suffering and doing his will, than in all\nriches. \"The secret of the Lord is with them that fear him, and he\nwill show them his covenant.\" To those who walk with God, he will show\nthe way in which they should go, and their experience will assure them\nthat he directs their paths. \"Bread shall be given them, and their\nwater shall be sure.\" She passed through many trials of a temporal\nnature, but she was comforted of her God through them all; and at last\nwas put in possession of an eternal treasure in heaven, \"where neither\nmoth nor rust doth corrupt, nor thieves break through and steal.\" May\nthis contrast be solemnly examined, and the example of this child of\nGod made a blessing to many.\n\n In anticipation of her approaching trial, with which her own life\nmight be suddenly terminated, Mrs. Graham _set her house in\norder_, and wrote the two following letters: one to her friend Mrs.\nGrandidier, to whom and her husband Capt. Grandidier, she committed\nthe charge of her family and affairs; the other to her father in\nScotland, commending her children to his protection. Her tender and\naffectionate appeals to each of them in respect to their own eternal\nwelfare, are a beautiful specimen of that Christian fidelity and love\nof the souls of men which so strongly characterized her future life.\n\n\n \"ST. JOHNS, Antigua, 1774.\n\n \"MY DEAR MRS. GRANDIDIER--The long and steady friendship which\nhas subsisted between us, in sickness and in health, in prosperity and\nadversity, ever the same, without change or diminution, leaves me no\nroom to doubt that it will extend to my little family, and that you\nwill be as ready, to the utmost of your power, to befriend them, as\nyou have been to the dear father already gone, and your friend, who\nis, perhaps, about to follow.\n\n \"If it should please God to take me away in my approaching\nconfinement, I leave you and Capt. Grandidier full power to dispose of\nevery thing in this house, and belonging to me in this island, as you\nshall think most for the advantage of my little family. You know my\nextreme tenderness for their dear father made me unable to part with\nany of his clothes, but these can be of no consequence to me when I\nshall again have joined him for whose sake I kept them; you may\ntherefore dispose of them, and also of my own, if you think the avails\nwill be of more service to the children. But I do not choose to leave\nany particular directions about my trifling effects; you will consult\nwith other friends, and I am certain you will act for them to the best\nof your judgment. It is a great relief to my mind that I have such\nsteady and tried friends to leave the charge of them upon. Miss\nG. B---- has promised to take J----, and it is my desire that the\nothers, and the infant yet unborn, if it survive, be sent to my\nfather, where I will leave them to be disposed of and provided for by\nthat God who has fed me all my life, by their heavenly Father, who has\ncommanded me to leave my fatherless children upon him, that he will\npreserve them alive, and whose promise I have, that he will never\nleave them nor forsake them.\n\n \"Mr. Reid will not be less kind to the offspring of his friend\nwhen they have lost, than when they were under a mother's protection.\nMay the blessing of the widow and the fatherless follow him wherever\nhe goes, and may God recompense him a thousand-fold in blessings\nspiritual and temporal. Let Diana* be sent with my children; if\nthere be an infant, you know a nurse must be found for it, whatever it\ncost. As for Susan,* I am at a loss what to do with her; my heart\ntells me I have no right to entail slavery upon her and her offspring;\nI know I shall be blamed, but I am about to be called to account by a\nhigher power than any in this world for my conduct, and I dare not\nallow her to be sold. I therefore leave it to herself either to remain\nhere, or if it be her desire, to accompany the children. I beg Mr.\nReid will be kind enough to allow her a passage with the rest.\n\n*The two Indian girls.\n\n \"And now, my dear friend, as the greatest happiness I can wish\nyou, may that God whom I have chosen as my own portion, be yours also;\nmay he, by his outward providence and by the inward operations of his\nSpirit on your heart, lead you to himself and convince you of the\ntruth. But O, my dear friend, shut not your eyes and ears against\nconviction. You are not satisfied that the Bible is indeed the word of\nGod. Is it not worth inquiring into? What would you think of a man who\nhad a large fortune, and the whole depending on proving some certain\nfacts, and yet would not be at the pains to inform himself? Are the\ninterests of this world of such importance, which in a few fleeting\nyears we must leave and have done with for ever, and our final state\nin the next, which is to fix us in happiness or misery through the\nendless days of eternity, not worth a thought? Think then, and\nseriously ask, 'What if it be so? What if this be indeed the word of\nGod given by inspiration, for the rule of both our faith and manners,\nand by which we are to be judged? What if this same God, who so kindly\nreveals his will to men, has with it given the clearest evidences and\nstrongest proofs that it is his own word?' Think, I say, my dear\nfriend, if it should be so, what they deserve who either reject or\nneglect it without taking the trouble to inform themselves, or to be\nconvinced that it either is or is not of divine authority.\n\n \"How many great, learned, and wise men have sifted these\nevidences with the greatest care, and the deeper they entered into the\nsearch, the more clear they appeared, even those whose lives are\nentirely contrary to it, and whose interest it is to wish it false,\ncannot deny. As to the various explanations of it, it is every one's\nduty to read for himself, and although there may be some parts of it\ntoo deep for every capacity, and which may perhaps require a knowledge\nof the history of the times to understand, yet the simple truths of\nthe gospel, what we are to believe concerning God, and what duties he\nrequires of us, and what he forbids, are equally plain and easy. If we\ncan only once be satisfied that it is indeed the word of God, set\nourselves to study it with an unprejudiced mind, with a sincere desire\nto know the truth and be led by it, with earnest prayer that the same\nSpirit which inspired the writers would make it plain to our hearts\nand understandings, that God himself would teach us its true meaning,\nand save us from error, we shall, I venture to say, be taught all\nnecessary knowledge, and be led in the way to eternal life, and not\nsuffered to err: we have God's promise that it shall be so. 'If any\nman will do His will, he shall know of the doctrine whether it be of\nGod.'\n\n \"Forgive me, my dear friend; the subject appears to me so\nimportant that I know not how to have done. I love you with a true\nand sincere friendship: I love your soul, and am deeply interested\nin its eternal happiness. Once more I commit you to that God, who\nonly can lead you to himself and to true happiness; and that you may\nknow the truth of this from deep experience, to the eternal joy,\npeace, and safety of your immortal soul, is the last prayer of your\naffectionate friend, who hopes to meet and rejoice with you in our\nRedeemer's kingdom.\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham to her Father.\n\n \"ANTIGUA, May, 1774.\n\n \"MY EVER-DEAR FATHER--If this ever reach you, it will be when I\nhave taken my final leave of this world, and received my portion for\neternity in the next, when I hope I shall have gained the summit of my\nwishes, and be happy in the society of my dear husband and much-loved\nmother, in the kingdom of our Redeemer.\n\n \"My truly orphan children I have desired to be sent to you;\nthough I see no visible way you have to provide for them, yet I am\nperfectly easy concerning them. I leave them upon that God who has fed\nme all my life, and whose tender care I have experienced in a thousand\ndangers--upon their and my heavenly Father, who has commanded me to\nleave my fatherless children upon him, and he will preserve them\nalive. The God of providence will prepare for them a home, and raise\nup friends, perhaps from a quarter neither you nor I could expect.\n\n \"My only concern and prayer to God for them is, that they may be\nearly taught to love God and serve him--that they may fall into such\nhands as will carefully instruct them in the principles of morality\nand religion, and teach them the great, but too little thought of\ntruth, that our chief business in life is to prepare for death. As to\nthe polite parts of education, I look upon them as of no consequence;\nthey may be as good Christians, perhaps better, without than with\nthem; the perfection of their nature no way depends upon them. I am\nequally indifferent what station of life they may occupy, whether they\nswim in affluence or earn their daily bread, if they only act their\npart properly, and obtain the approbation of their God in that station\nwherein he in his infinite wisdom sees fit to place them.\n\n \"Remember to give my love to all my dear children. I reckon all\nthat sprung from my dear doctor mine; and though I did not suffer a\nmother's pangs for them, Heaven knows how equally I love them with\nthose who cost me dearer. Tell them I leave them a mother's blessing;\nand my last prayers, if it please God to continue my senses, shall be\nfor their best interests.\n\n \"And now, my dear father, suffer one parting word, though from\none no way entitled to advise: this is the third loud call for you to\nbe also ready; according to the course of nature, you must very\nshortly follow; you can have very little more to do in this world, and\ntherefore the smallest share of your attention is due to it. The\nyoung, the gay, the giddy, and thoughtless hold it a wise maxim to\nforget their departed friends as soon as possible; this may be\nworldly, but it cannot be heavenly wisdom. To be fully and entirely\nresigned to the will of God in all things, is certainly the\ncharacteristic of a Christian; but this is perfectly consistent with\nthe most tender remembrance. That resignation--but indeed it deserves\nnot the name--which consists in forgetfulness, in banishing thought\nand drowning reflection in worldly cares and amusements, can be no\ngrateful offering to Him who has commanded us to have our loins girt\nand our lamps trimmed, and to be always ready, for in such an hour as\nwe think not 'the Son of man cometh.' How often are we commanded to\nwatch, to set our affections on things above, to be dead to the world,\nto lay up treasure for ourselves in heaven. These injunctions are\ninconsistent with forgetfulness; and if it be our duty to meditate on\ndeath and eternity, nothing more naturally leads our minds to that\nsubject than the recollection of departed friends, who, if pious, are\nnot lost, but only gone a little while before, taken from our earthly\nand added to our heavenly treasure.\n\n \"Believe me, my dear father, to a mind abstracted from the world\nand devoted to God, death, though solemn, has nothing dreadful in it;\non the contrary, to a mind rightly disposed it is rather a desirable\nobject. Just conceptions of God, and converse with him, will very soon\nchange the aspect of the king of terrors to a welcome messenger, who\ncomes to set open the gates of immortality, and to usher us into the\nkingdom of our heavenly Father. And now may our most gracious God\ngrant you, through your few remaining days, his direction and\nconsolation; may he bestow upon you that peace which the world can\nneither give nor take away; and when the appointed time of your change\nshall come, may the comforts of his Holy Spirit so cheer and refresh\nyour soul, that you may be able, without a doubt or a fear, to resign\nit into the hands of your Redeemer.\n\n \"Give my love to Hugh. The sentiments expressed in his letters\nbespeak him a worthy brother, and deserving of my highest esteem. I\nwould have written to him, but I have still some directions to commit\nto writing concerning my little family, and my hour is at hand; but\ntell him I will remember him in my last prayers. I charge him not to\nbanish the idea of his worthy and now glorified mother, lest with that\nhe also forget her precepts; but prepare to meet us who are gone\nbefore; and O, that our meeting may be with joy on both sides. It is\nhard for youth, in the present age, to follow our Christian pattern.\nEvery real Christian, every Bible Christian, must lay his account with\nbeing branded with the name of enthusiast; but tell him to remember\nthat the opinion of the world cannot alter the nature of holiness, nor\nthe maxims of Christ. Let him read, think, and judge for himself with\nan unprejudiced mind; with a hearty desire to know and be led by the\ntruth; to be taught of God, and conformed to his will in all things,\nand I venture to promise he will not be suffered to err. But let him\navoid disputes about religion, they are seldom productive of any good;\nlet him fortify his mind against banter and ridicule, it is no small\ndegree of persecution. Yet, if he be determined to follow his Lord, he\nmust expect to meet with it, and I know from experience it is hard to\nbear. I have found the safest way is to receive it in silence; for\nthose who are disposed to ridicule the appearance of religion in\nanother, are not in a fit disposition to be convinced by any argument,\nat least at that time, and few can dispute without heat, which is a\ntransgression against the virtue of meekness, and very apt to lessen\nour love to the person who opposes us. We lose the spirit of brotherly\nlove in hot-headed zeal, which perhaps deserves a harder name, but\nconceals itself under that appearance; and it is no small victory\ngained over ourselves if we are able to love, wish well to, and be\nready to serve those whose sentiments differ from ours.\n\n \"I leave you and yours, and mine, upon the Fountain of all\ngoodness, and may the peace of God, which passeth all understanding,\nkeep your hearts and minds in the knowledge and love of God, and of\nhis Son Jesus Christ our Lord; and the blessing of God Almighty, the\nFather, Son, and Holy Ghost, be among you, and remain with you\nalways. Amen.\n\n \"Your ever dutiful and affectionate daughter,\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n It pleased God to preserve the life of Mrs. Graham, and to make\nher the grateful mother of a son, whom she called after the name of\nhis father, and endeavored, in humble trust, to consecrate to the\nAuthor of his being.\n\n Having now no object to induce her to stay longer at Antigua, she\ndisposed of her slender property, and placing her money in the hands\nof Major Brown, requested him to take a passage for herself and\nfamily, and to lay in their sea-stores. After seeing a railing placed\naround the grave of her beloved husband, that his remains might not be\ndisturbed until mingled with their kindred dust, she bade adieu to her\nkind friends, and with a sorrowful heart turned her face towards her\nnative land.\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER III.\n\n RETURN TO SCOTLAND--SCHOOL IN EDINBURGH.\n\n No ship offering at this time from Antigua for Scotland, Mrs.\nGraham embarked with her family in one bound to Belfast, Ireland.\nMajor Brown and his brother officers saw her safely out to sea; and he\ngave her a letter to a gentleman in Belfast, containing, as he said, a\nbill for the balance of the money she had deposited with him. After a\nstormy and trying voyage, she arrived in safety at her destined port.\nThe correspondent in Ireland of Major Brown delivered her a letter\nfrom that officer expressive of esteem and affection, and stating that\nas a proof of respect for the memory of their deceased friend, he and\nhis brother officers had taken the liberty of defraying the expenses\nof her voyage.\n\n Consequently the bill he had given was for the full amount of her\noriginal deposit; and thus, like the brethren of Joseph, _she found\nall her money in the sack's mouth._ Being a stranger in Ireland,\nwithout a friend to look out for a proper vessel in which to embark\nfor Scotland, she and her children went passengers in a packet; on\nboard of which, as she afterwards learned, there was not even a\ncompass. A storm arose and they were tossed to and fro for nine hours\nin imminent danger. The rudder and the mast were carried away; every\nthing on deck thrown overboard; and at length the vessel struck in the\nnight upon a rock, on the coast of Ayr, in Scotland. The greatest\nconfusion pervaded the passengers and crew. Among a number of young\nstudents, going to the University at Edinburgh, some were swearing,\nsome praying, and all were in despair. The widow only remained\ncomposed. With her babe in her arms she hushed her weeping family, and\ntold them that in a few minutes they should all go to join their\nfather in a better world. The passengers wrote their names in their\npocket-books, that their bodies might be recognized and reported for\nthe information of their friends. One young man came into the cabin,\nasking, \"Is there any peace here?\" He was surprised to find a female\nso tranquil; a short conversation soon evinced that religion was the\nsource of comfort and hope to them both in this perilous hour. He\nengaged in prayer and then read the 107th Psalm. While repeating these\nwords, \"he maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are\nstill,\" the vessel swung off the rock by the rising of the tide. She\nhad been dashing against it for an hour and a half, the sea making a\nbreach over her, so that the hold was now nearly filled with water.\nTowards morning the storm subsided, and the vessel floated until she\nrested on a sand-bank. Assistance was afforded from the shore, and the\nshipwrecked company took shelter in a small inn, where the men seemed\nanxious to drown the remembrance of danger in a bowl of punch. How\nfaithful a monitor is conscience! This voice is listened to in extreme\nperil; but O, infatuated man, how anxious art thou to stifle the\nwarnings of wisdom in the hour of prosperity. Thousands of our race,\nno doubt, delay their preparation for eternity until, by sudden death,\nthey have scarcely a moment left to perform this solemn work.\n\n Mrs. Graham retired to a private room, to offer up thanksgiving\nto God for his goodness, and to commend herself and her orphans to his\nfuture care.\n\n A gentleman from Ayr, hearing of the shipwreck, came down to\noffer assistance; and in him Mrs. Graham was happy to recognize an\nold friend. This gentleman paid her and her family much attention,\ncarrying them to his own house, and treating them with kindness\nand hospitality.\n\n In a day or two after this she reached Cartside, and entered her\nfather's dwelling; not the large ancient mansion in which she had left\nhim, but a thatched cottage, consisting of three apartments. Possessed\nof a too easy temper and unsuspecting disposition, Mr. Marshall had\nbeen induced to become security for some of his friends, whose failure\nin business had reduced him to poverty. He now acted as factor of a\ngentleman's estate in this neighborhood, of whose father he had been\nthe intimate friend, with a salary of twenty pounds sterling per annum\nand the use of a small farm.\n\n In a short time, however, his health failed, and he was deprived\nof this scanty pittance, being incapable, as the proprietor was\npleased to think, of fulfilling the duties of factor.\n\n Alive to every call of duty, Mrs. Graham now considered her\nfather as added, with her children, to the number of dependents on her\nindustry. She proved indeed a good daughter--faithful, affectionate,\nand dutiful, she supported her father through his declining years; and\nhe died at her house, Feb. 13, 1783, aged 75, during her residence in\nEdinburgh, surrounded by his daughter and her children, who tenderly\nwatched him during his last illness.\n\n Having resided two years at Cartside, she removed to Paisley in\n1778, where she taught a small school. The slender profits of such an\nestablishment, with a widow's pension of sixteen pounds sterling, were\nthe means of subsistence for herself and her family. When she first\nreturned to Cartside a few religious friends called to welcome her\nhome. The gay and wealthy part of her former acquaintances, who, like\nthe butterfly, spread their silken wings only to bask in the warmth of\na summer sun, found not their way to the lonely cottage of an\nafflicted widow. Her worth, though in after-life rendered splendid by\nits own fruits, was at this time hidden, excepting to those whose\nreflection and wisdom had taught them to discern it more in the faith\nand submission of the soul, than in the selfish and extravagant\nexhibitions of that wealth bestowed by the bounty of Providence, but\nexpended too often for the purposes of vanity and dissipation.\n\n In such circumstances, the Christian character of Mrs. Graham was\nstrongly marked. Sensible that her heavenly Father saw it good, at\nthis time, to depress her outward condition, full of filial\ntenderness, and like a real child of God resigned to whatever should\nappear to be his will, her conduct conformed to his dispensations.\nWith a cheerful heart, and in the hope of faith, she set herself to\nwalk down into the valley of humiliation, \"leaning upon Jesus,\" as the\nbeloved of her soul. \"I delight to do thy will, O my God, yea, thy law\nis within my heart,\" was the spontaneous effusion of her genuine\nfaith. She received with affection the scriptural admonition, \"Humble\nyourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt\nyou in due time; casting all your care upon him, for he careth\nfor you.\"\n\n She laid aside her children's fine frocks, and clothed them in\nhomespun. At Cartside she sold the butter she made, and her children\nwere fed on the milk. It was her wish to eat her own bread, however\ncoarse, and to owe no person anything but love. At Paisley, for a\nseason, her breakfast and supper was porridge, and her dinner potatoes\nand salt. Peace with God and a contented mind supplied the lack of\nearthly prosperity, and she adverted to this her humble fare, to\ncomfort the hearts of suffering sisters, with whom she corresponded at\na later period of life, when in comfortable circumstances.\n\n Meantime the Lord was not unmindful of his believing child; but\nwas preparing the minds of her friends for introducing her to a more\nenlarged sphere of usefulness.\n\n Her pious and attached friend, Mrs. Major Brown, had accompanied\nher husband to Scotland, and they now resided on their estate in\nAyrshire. Mr. Peter Reid, a kind friend when in Antigua, was now a\nmerchant in London. This gentleman advised her to invest the little\nmoney she had brought home--and which she had still preserved--in\nmuslins; which she could work into finer articles of dress, and he\nwould ship them in a vessel of his own/freight free, to be sold in the\nWest Indies. His object was partly to increase her little capital, and\npartly to divert her mind from meditating so deeply on the loss of her\nlamented husband. The plan so kindly proposed was soon adopted; the\nmuslin dresses were shipped; but she soon afterwards learned that the\nship was captured by the French. This was a severe loss, and more\ndeeply felt as it was received at the time when her father was\ndeprived of his office.\n\n Mrs. Brown, after consulting with the Rev. Mr. Randall of\nGlasgow, the Rev. Mr. Ellis of Paisley, Lady Glenorchy and Mrs. Walker\nof Edinburgh, proposed to Mrs. Graham to take charge of a\nboarding-school in that metropolis.\n\n The friends of religion were of opinion that such an\nestablishment, under the direction of one possessing the\nqualifications of Mrs. Graham, would be of singular benefit to young\nladies destined for important stations in society. Her liberal\neducation, her acquaintance with life, and her humble yet ardent\npiety, were considered peculiarly calculated to qualify her for so\nimportant a trust.\n\n Another friend had suggested to Mrs. Graham the propriety of\nopening a boarding-house in Edinburgh, which he thought could, through\nhis influence, be easily filled by students.\n\n She saw obstacles to both: a boarding-house did not appear\nsuitable, as her daughters would not be so likely to have the same\nadvantages of education as from a boarding-school; and to engage as an\ninstructress of youth on so large a scale, with so many competitors,\nappeared for her an arduous undertaking.\n\n In this perplexity, as in former trials, she fled to her unerring\ncounsellor the Lord, her covenant God. She set apart a day for fasting\nand prayer. She spread her case before the Lord, earnestly beseeching\nhim to make his word \"a light to her feet and a lamp to her path,\" and\n\"to lead her in the way in which she should go;\" especially that she\nmight be directed to choose the path in which she could best promote\nhis glory and the highest interests of herself and her children. On\nsearching the Scriptures, her mind fastened on these words in John\n21:15, \"Simon, son of Jonas, lovest thou me more than these? He saith\nunto him, Yea, Lord; thou knowest that I love thee. He saith unto him,\nFeed my lambs.\"\n\n Never, perhaps, was this commandment applied with more filial\nconfidence, or accompanied with a richer blessing, since the days of\nthe apostle, than in the present instance.\n\n Her determination was accordingly made. She resolved to undertake\nthe education of youth, trusting that her Lord would make her an\nhumble instrument of training some for his service on earth, and his\npraises in heaven. Here was exhibited an instance of simple yet\npowerful faith in a believer surrounded by temporal perplexities, and\nof condescension and mercy on the part of a compassionate God. Light\nunseen by mortal eyes descended on her path.\n\n How weak, perhaps enthusiastic, would this have appeared to the\nbusy crowd, blind to the special providence exercised by the God of\nheaven towards all his creatures. She felt the pressure of her\naffliction; but, like the Psalmist, _gave herself unto prayer_:\n\n \"Prayer ardent opens heaven, lets down a stream\n Of glory on the consecrated hour\n Of man in audience with the Deity.\"\n\n Though her faith was strong, yet her mind was under such\nagitation, from her total want of funds to carry her plan into effect,\nand from other conflicting exercises, as to throw her into a nervous\nfever, which kept her confined to her bed for some weeks. On her\nrecovery, she felt it her duty to _go forward,_ trusting that He,\nwho had directed her path, would provide the means that were necessary\nto enable her to walk in it: she sold her heavy furniture, packed up\nall her remaining effects, and prepared to set out from Paisley for\nEdinburgh on a Monday, in the year 1779.\n\n On the Saturday previous she sat by her fire musing and wondering\nin what manner the Lord would appear for her at this time, when a\nletter was brought to her from Mr. Peter Reid, enclosing a sum of\nmoney which he had recovered from the underwriters, on account of Mrs.\nGraham's muslins captured on their passage to the West Indies. Mrs.\nGraham had considered them as totally lost, but her friend had taken\nthe precaution to have them insured.\n\n With this supply she was enabled to accomplish her object, and\narrived in Edinburgh with her family. Her friend Mrs. Brown met her\nthere, and stayed with her a few days, to comfort and patronize her in\nher new undertaking. Mrs. Brown was her warm and constant friend until\nher death, which occurred at Paisley in 1782, when she was attending\nthe communion. She bequeathed her daughter Mary to Mrs. Graham's care.\nBut in 1785 the daughter followed the mother, being cut off by a fever\nin the twelfth year of her age.\n\n It may be proper here to introduce the name of Mr. George\nAnderson, a merchant in Glasgow, who had been an early and particular\nfriend of Dr. Graham. He kindly offered his friendly services, and the\nuse of his purse, to promote the welfare of the bereaved family of his\nfriend. Mrs. Graham occasionally drew upon both. The money she\nborrowed she had the satisfaction of repaying with interest. A\ncorrespondence was carried on between them after Mrs. Graham's removal\nto America, until the death of Mr. Anderson, in 1802.\n\n During her residence in Edinburgh she was honored with the\nfriendship and counsel of many persons of distinction and piety. The\nViscountess Glenorchy, Lady Boss Baillie, Lady Jane Belches, Mrs.\nWalter Scott, mother of the poet, Mrs. Dr. Davidson, and Mrs.\nBaillie Walker, were among her warm personal friends. The Rev. Dr.\nErskine, and Dr. Davidson, formerly the Rev. Mr. Randall of Glasgow,\nand many respectable clergymen, were also her friends. She and her\nfamily attended on the ministry of Dr. Davidson, an able,\nevangelical, useful pastor.\n\n Her school soon became respectable in numbers and character. Her\nearly and superior education now proved of essential service to her.\nShe was indefatigable in her attention to the instruction of her\npupils. While she was faithful in giving them those accomplishments\nwhich were to qualify them for acting a distinguished part in this\nworld, she was also zealous in directing their attention to that\ngospel by which they were instructed to obtain an inheritance in that\nto come. She felt a high responsibility, and took a deep interest in\ntheir temporal and spiritual welfare. As \"a mother in Israel,\" she\nwished to train them up in the ways of the Lord.\n\n She prayed with them morning and evening; and on the Sabbath,\nwhich she was careful to devote to its proper use, she took great\npains to imbue their minds with the truths of religion. Nor did she\nlabor in vain. Although she was often heard to lament of how little\nuse she had been compared with her opportunities of doing good, yet\nwhen her children, Mr. and Mrs. B. visited Scotland in 1801, they\nheard of many individuals, then pious and exemplary, who dated their\nfirst religious impressions from those seasons of early instruction\nwhich they enjoyed under Mrs. Graham while in Edinburgh.\n\n Mrs. Graham's manner in the management of youth was peculiarly\nhappy. While she kept them diligent in their studies, and strictly\nobedient to the laws she had established, she was endeared to them by\nher tenderness; and the young ladies instructed in her school retained\nfor her in after-life a degree of filial affection which was expressed\non many affecting occasions. This was afterwards remarkably the case\nwith her pupils in America. Her little republic was completely\ngoverned by a system of equitable laws. On every alleged offence, a\ncourt-martial, as they termed it, was held, and the accused tried by\nher peers. There were no arbitrary punishments, no sallies of\ncapricious passion. The laws were promulgated, and obedience was\nindispensable; the sentences of the courts-martial were always\napproved, and had a salutary effect. In short, there was a combination\nof authority, decision, and tenderness in Mrs. Graham's government,\nthat rendered its subjects industrious, intelligent, circumspect, and\nhappy. She enjoyed their happiness; and in cases of sickness, she\nwatched over them with unremitting solicitude and care, sparing no\nexpense to promote their restoration to health.\n\n A strong trait in her character was distinctly marked by her\neducating the daughters of pious ministers at half price. This was\nsetting an example worthy of imitation. It was a conduct conformable\nto scriptural precept. Said Paul, \"If we have sown unto you spiritual\nthings, is it a great thing if we shall reap your carnal things? Do ye\nnot know that they which minister about holy things live of the things\nof the temple? Even so hath the Lord ordained that they which preach\nthe gospel should live by the gospel.\"\n\n Always conscientious in obeying the commandments of her God, she\nobserved them in this matter, giving, in her proportion, at least the\nwidow's mite.\n\n By another plan, for she was ingenious in contrivances to do\ngood, she greatly assisted those in slender circumstances, especially\nsuch as were of the household of faith. Believing that the use of sums\nof ten, fifteen, or twenty pounds in hand would be serviceable by way\nof capital to persons in a moderate business, she was in the habit of\nmaking such advances, and taking back the value in articles they had\nfor sale. She charged no interest, being amply repaid in the luxury of\nher own feelings, when she beheld the benefit it produced to her\nhumble friends. The board of her pupils being paid in advance, she was\nenabled to adopt this plan with more facility. Were her spirit more\nprevalent in the world, what good might be done. The heart would be\nexpanded, reciprocal confidence and affection cherished; and instead\nof beholding worms of the dust fighting for particles of yellow sand,\nwe should behold a company of affectionate brethren leaning upon and\nassisting each other through the wilderness of this world. \"Look not\nevery man on his own things,\" said Paul, \"but every man also on the\nthings of others. Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law\nof Christ.\"\n\n On the subject of promoting the external accomplishments of her\nscholars, it became a question how far Mrs. Graham was to\ncountenance them in their attendance on public balls--to what length\nit was proper for her to go so as to meet the received opinions of\nthe world in these concerns. She consulted with her pious friends,\nand wrote to Lady Glenorchy on the subject. Her ladyship's letter in\nreply is so excellent that the serious reader will be gratified with\nits insertion.\n\n\n \"BARNTON, December 27, 1781.\n\n \"DEAR MADAM--I received your letter last week, and also one some\ntime ago from Mrs. Walker, in which she desired me to send you my\nsentiments upon the alteration you had made, and still thought of\nmaking, upon your plan.\n\n \"I have since endeavored to consider, with all the attention of\nwhich I am _at present_ capable, the arguments that may be\nbrought on both sides of the question; and with regard to the first\npoint, the _practisings_, I will frankly own, that could you send\nyour young ladies to one where _girls only_ are admitted, I\nshould more readily yield my opinion of the matter to those Christians\nwho have advised you to it. But as I learn that it is a promiscuous\ndance of boys and girls, I must in conscience say that I look upon\nsuch a meeting to be as pernicious in its effects upon the minds of\nyoung people, as balls and public assemblies on persons of riper\nyears. When you mentioned the subject to me first, I thought it had\nbeen a practising of girls _only_, else I should then have given\nyou my sentiments fully upon that head.\n\n \"As to the _reading of plays_, or any part of them, to your\nyoung people, I must own, it does not appear to me to be expedient; it\nmay be productive of bad consequences, and the _good_ arising\nfrom it is, at most, uncertain. It is, no doubt, very desirable to\nenlarge young people's minds and improve their taste as well as their\npersons; but such is the state of things in this world, that to attain\nthis to the degree wished for by every person of refined taste, some\nthings must be sacrificed of much greater value: for example, a girl\ncannot acquire the smart, polished air of a person of fashion, without\nimbibing too much of the spirit of the world. _Vanity_ and\n_emulation_ must be awakened and cultivated in the heart, before\nshe will apply herself with diligence to outward accomplishments; nor\ncan her mind and taste be much improved in _polite_ literature,\nwithout losing its relish for simple truth. I grant you, there are a\nfew Christians in the world who have acquired the outward\naccomplishments of it, and have, by grace, been enabled to turn these\nto good account--who, like the Israelites, having spoiled the\nEgyptians, have made use of _their_ jewels in adorning the\ntabernacle; but this can never serve as an argument on your side of\nthe question. If the Lord sees fit to manifest his power and grace by\nplucking a brand from the burning, this is no reason why children\nshould be initiated into the ways of sin and folly, in hopes that some\ntime or other he will bring them out. We are never to do evil that\ngood may come; and this brings the question to a short issue.\n\n \"Do you think it lawful for Christians to attend public places,\nor to spend their time in reading plays? Do you think these things\ntend, either immediately or remotely, to promote the glory of God? If\nyou do not, I cannot see how you, _as a Christian_, can have any\nhand in introducing young ladies to the one or in giving them a taste\nfor the other.\n\n \"This, dear madam, is _my_ view of the matter; but I do not\nwish _you_ to walk by _my_ light. I believe all the children of God\nare _taught by him_, and ought to follow the dictates of their own\nconsciences: I therefore pretend not _to advise_ you, but shall\nendeavor to _pray_ that the great _unerring_ Counsellor may give you\ndivine wisdom to be your teacher, to lead you into all truth, and to\nkeep you from every thing inconsistent with his holy will.\n\n \"I have met with so many interruptions since I began this letter,\nthat I fear that it is hardly intelligible. I shall be sorry if I have\nsaid any thing that gives you uneasiness; your spirits seem low, and\nyour business does not succeed so well as could be wished: perhaps I\nought to have employed my pen in the way of consolation and\nencouragement, than by throwing in fresh matter of perplexity. Sure I\nam, I do not _mean_ to add affliction to the afflicted; but\nrather have been impelled, from a regard to truth, to write my real\nsentiments, as you desired.\n\n \"Your friend and humble servant,\n\n \"W. GLENORCHY.\"\n\n\n In after-life, Mrs. Graham was of opinion that she and her\nscholars had gone too far in conformity with the opinions and manners\nof the world. A reference to this deviation from what she considered a\nclose Christian walk in life, will be frequently found in her\nsubsequent exercises.\n\n Lady Glenorchy being in a delicate state of health, made frequent\nuse of Mrs. Graham as her almoner to the poor. On one of these visits,\nMrs. Graham called on a poor woman with a present of a new gown. \"I am\nobliged to you and her ladyship for your kindness,\" said the poor\nwoman rich in faith, \"but I maun gang to the right airth first; ye wad\nna hae come, gin ye had na been sent; the Lord hath left me lately wi'\nbut ae goon for week-day and Sabbath, but now he has sent you wi' a\nSabbath-day's goon.\" Meaning, in plain English, that her thankfulness\nwas first due to the God of providence, who had put it into the hearts\nof his children to supply the wants of this poor disciple.\n\n Mrs. Graham used to repeat with pleasure an anecdote of her\nfriends Mr. and Mrs. Douglas. Mr. Douglas was a tallow-chandler, and\nfurnished candles for Lady Glenorchy's chapel. The excise-tax was very\nhigh on making those articles, and many persons of the trade were\naccustomed to defraud the revenue by one stratagem or another.\nReligious principle would not permit Mr. Douglas to do so. Mrs. Graham\none evening was remarking how handsomely the chapel was lighted. \"Aye,\nMrs. Graham,\" said Mrs. Douglas, \"and it is all pure--the light is all\npure, it burns bright.\" It would be well if Christians of every trade\nand profession were to act in like manner; that the merchant should\nhave no hand in unlawfully secreting property, or encouraging perjury\nto accumulate gains; that the man of great wealth should have neither\nusury nor the shedding of blood by privateering to corrode his\ntreasures; that all should observe a just weight and a just measure in\ntheir dealings, as in the presence of God. Let every Christian seek\nafter the consolation of Mrs. Douglas, that the light which refreshes\nhim may be pure.\n\n It being stated as matter of regret, that poor people when sick\nsuffered greatly, although while in health their daily labor supported\nthem, Mrs. Graham suggested the idea of every poor person in the\nneighborhood laying aside _one penny a week_ to form a fund for\nrelieving the contributors when in sickness. Mr. Douglas undertook the\nformation of such an institution. It went for a long time under the\nname of \"The Penny Society.\" It afterwards received a more liberal\npatronage, has now a handsome capital, and is called, \"The Society for\nthe Relief of the Destitute Sick.\"\n\n In July, 1786, Mrs. Graham attended the dying bed of her friend\nand patroness Lady Glenorchy: this lady had shown her friendship in a\nvariety of ways during her valuable life; she had one of Mrs. Graham's\ndaughters for some time in her family, condescended herself to\ninstruct her, and sent her for a year to a French boarding-school in\nRotterdam. She defrayed all her expenses while there, and furnished\nher with a liberal supply of pocket-money, that she might not see\ndistress without the power of relieving it. So much does a person's\nconduct in maturer years depend upon the habits of early life, that it\nis wise to accustom young people to feel for and to contribute in\ntheir degree to the relief of the afflicted and the needy.\n\n Lady Glenorchy was a character in whom was eminently displayed\nthe power of religion. Descended from an ancient family, married to\nthe eldest son of the Earl of Broadalbaine, beautiful and\naccomplished, she was received into the first circles of society. With\nher husband she made the tour of Europe, visiting the several courts\non that continent. Yet all these things she \"counted but loss for the\nexcellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus her Lord.\" She became a\nwidow while yet in the bloom of youth. She devoted herself to the\nservice of the Lord, and was made singularly useful. She kept a\nregular account of her income, and of the different objects to which\nit was applied. She built and supported several chapels in England,\nand erected one in Edinburgh, in which pious ministers of different\ndenominations should be admitted to preach.\n\n She also built a manufactory for the employment of the poor,\nwhere the education of children was strictly attended to: even the\nporters' lodges on each side of her gate were occupied as schools for\nthe neighboring poor. Her pleasure-grounds were thrown open for the\naccommodation of the numbers who usually come from a distance to\nattend a communion-season in Scotland. In a year of scarcity the same\ngrounds were planted with potatoes for the supply of the poor. She\ndistributed with great judgment various sums of money in aid of\nfamilies who were poor, yet deserving. She never encouraged idleness\nor pride, and often remarked that it was better to assist people to do\nwell in the sphere which Providence had assigned them, than to attempt\nto raise them beyond it. There was so much wisdom in the active\napplication of her charities, as to render them both efficient and\nextensive. She seldom was seen in these works of beneficence; her\nobject was to do good: the gratitude of those on whom she bestowed\nbenefits was no part of her motive, or even of her calculation. What\nshe did she did unto God, and in obedience to his commands; her faith\nand hope were in God.\n\n She contributed largely to the public institutions established at\nEdinburgh in her day. Of one or two of the most useful she was the\nfirst to suggest the idea, always accompanying her recommendation with\na handsome donation to encourage the work.\n\n The venerable Society for the Promotion of Christian Knowledge\nand Piety shared largely her patronage; and at her death she\nbequeathed them five thousand pounds.\n\n She indulged the hope of seeing a union of exertion, among all\nChristian denominations, for sending the gospel to the heathen. How\ndelighted would she have been with the missionary societies of\nLondon and elsewhere, had her life been spared to behold their\nextensive operations.\n\n She sold her estate of Barnton that she might apply the money to\na more disinterested object than her personal accommodation, and that\nher fortune might be expended with her life, \"I recollect here,\" said\nSaurin in one of his sermons, \"an epitaph said to be engraven on the\ntomb of Atolus of Rheims: _He exported his fortune before him into\nheaven by his charities--he Has gone thither to enjoy it_.\"\n\n This might be truly said of Lady Glenorchy. In her manner she\ndiscovered great dignity of character tempered with the meekness and\nbenevolence of the gospel. Her family was arranged with much economy,\nand a strict regard to moral and religious habits. She usually\nsupported some promising and pious young minister as her chaplain,\nwhich served him as an introduction to respectability in the church.\nWith very few exceptions, all those who entered her family as servants\nwere in process of time brought under religious impressions. So far it\npleased the Lord to honor her pious endeavors to render her family one\nof the dwellings of the God of Jacob.\n\n Mrs. Graham had the honor of attending the death-bed, and of\nclosing the eyes of this distinguished child of God. It had been Lady\nGlenorchy's express desire that Mrs. Graham should be sent for, if\nwithin twenty miles of her, when such attendance should be necessary.\n\n The following letter to a daughter, two months later, gives us\nanother illustration of the self-denial and anxiety for the salvation\nof the soul, with which Mrs. Graham personally ministered to the needy\nand the suffering, and how skilfully she improved these scenes for the\nbenefit of others.\n\n\n \"EDINBURGH, September, 1786.\n\n \"MY DEAR DAUGHTER--Such a scene as I have been witness to!--poor\nM. B---- is gone to her last abode; her state is fixed for ever. I\nattended her sick-bed for eight successive days and nights, except\nperhaps for an hour that I lay down in the same room. I held by life\nto the very last, because I feared she was not in a fit state to die.\n\n \"She took every medicine that was prescribed for her, which I\nadministered with my own hand; but the time appointed to end her\nmortal state had arrived, and go she must. She lived four days after\nthe physicians had lost all hope, and I think I never witnessed\ngreater distress. I watched every word with anxious care to find if\nany breath of prayer was to be heard; but alas, I had no such\nsatisfaction. As she was insensible after the first few days, it was\nnot to be expected she could either think or pray.\n\n \"O, why will sinners resist the grace of God, and spend the\nprecious time given to seek and find it in thoughtless folly? What can\nthey do, on such a bed of distress, who have no God? Time misspent and\ngone--opportunities unimproved and gone--calls resisted never to be\nrepeated--death hunting the soul through every avenue of life--a\ndreadful, unknown, unthought of eternity at hand--an awful Judge, and\nno Advocate secured to plead. A time was when a kind Saviour was\nexpostulating with them: 'Why will you die?' 'Hear, and your soul\nshall live;' 'Ask, and you shall receive; seek, and you shall find;\nknock, and it shall be opened unto you;' 'Look unto me and be ye\nsaved, all ye ends of the earth;' 'Let the wicked forsake his way, and\nthe unrighteous man his thoughts, and let him return unto the Lord,\nand he will have mercy upon him, and to our God, for he will\nabundantly pardon;' 'Ho, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the\nwaters'--blessings purchased by Christ: pardon of sin, reconciliation\nwith God, a new heart and spirit, all that is necessary for time and\neternity--'He that hath no money,' no merit, no good about him, no\nclaim upon any account whatever, 'come, buy and eat, without money and\nwithout price;' 'Why spend ye your money,' time, talents, affections,\ndesires, 'for that which is not bread,' and cannot satisfy? 'incline\nyour ear, and come unto me; hear, and your soul shall live, and I will\nmake an everlasting covenant with you. Now is the accepted time; now\nis the day of salvation. To-day if ye will hear his voice, harden not\nyour heart.'\n\n \"Such is the language of the dear Redeemer to sinners every day,\nin his written word, from the pulpit, and in the dispensations of his\nprovidence; but O, the madness of sinners, who will not think, who\nwill not attend, will not apply to this Saviour, whose sole errand\ninto this world was to seek and to save sinners, yea, the very chief;\nbut they will not put their souls into his hands, nor give him any\nservice. A time will come, and we are forewarned of it, when this same\ninviting Saviour will say, 'Because I have called and ye refused,\nstretched out my hand and no man regarded, I also will laugh at your\ncalamity, and will mock when your fear cometh.'\n\n \"Improve this dispensation, my dear child; beg of the Lord to\nsearch you and try you, and see that your hopes be well grounded.\n\n \"Your affectionate mother,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n The following to her beloved friend Mrs. Walker, shows the\nimpressions made on the mind of Mrs. Graham by visiting _the place\nof her nativity and the scene of her struggles with this world's\nadversity_, when the hand of God was heavy upon her.\n\n\n \"EDINBURGH, September, 1787.\n\n \"MY DEAR MADAM--I have been on a jaunt for nearly three weeks; my\nschool mostly dismissed, the remainder I left with Miss S----.\nGoodness and mercy have followed me, and the Lord has taken care of my\nhouse also in my absence. Yours was put into my hand on my return, and\nbrought fresh cause of thankfulness; your observation, that we were\nmutually feeding on the same allowance, continues to hold. I too have\nbeen considering the works and doings of the Lord, and many of them\nhave been renewed in my memory by the scenes I have passed through.\n\n \"I visited the seat of my juvenile years with my dear and only\nbrother. There I recollected the days of my vanity, and the Lord's\npatience and long-suffering; my repenting, my returning, his\npardoning, his blessing; my backslidings, his stripes and\nchastisements, his restoring and recovering, yea, many and many times.\nThere, too, I found my old acquaintances no more; most of them had\nfinished their course under the sun; some I could still clasp in the\narms of faith, as united to the glorious Head, and now singing the\nsong of Moses and the Lamb. From the idea of others, I was obliged to\nturn away and say, 'The Judge of all the earth shall do right.'\n\n \"I recollected a lowly cottage, where lived a pious father,\nmother, two daughters, and a son; where the voice of prayer seldom\nceased, the voice of complaint was seldom heard: not one stone\nremained upon another; only the bushes which surrounded it, and the\nruins of a little garden, the seat of secret communion of each with\ntheir God in turn; for one little earth-floored place was all their\nhouse-convenience, and in the winter's storm their little cow-house,\nbuilt under the same humble roof, was their secret temple. I found\nthree had gone to glory: of the other two I could learn no tidings;\nbut I shall see them one day in very different mansions. I saw others\nspreading like a green bay-tree, adding field to field, and dwelling\nalone, servants and dependents excepted.\n\n \"I saw my father's cottage, in the day when the Lord pressed\nhim down, and the place where my dear glorified-mother poured out\nmany prayers for me and mine; my own retirement too, after the\nvanity I had seen of human life, and when tired and sick of it, I\nsought to end my days in solitude, saying, 'It is enough; here let\nthy servant depart in peace, and let my children be reared in\nobscurity.' Then I returned to the town where my husband had\npractised as a physician, where I had been respected and tasted\nlargely of life's comfort. I saw the house we had lived in, and many\ntender scenes passed; to this same town I had returned a widow,\nhelpless and poor, neglected and forgotten. I saw the house where I\nhad taught my little school, and earned my porridge, potatoes, and\nsalt; when I found myself totally neglected by some who once thought\nthemselves honored by my acquaintance; while others, once shining in\naffluence, were now reduced to humble dwellings.\n\n \"The Lord has been saying, 'Know and consider all the way by\nwhich I have led thee, to prove thee, and try thee, to show thee what\nwas in thy heart, that he might do thee good in thy latter end.' He is\nnow saying, 'Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might;'\n'Occupy till I come.' Oh, for a thankful heart, a loving, a zealous\nheart, a meek and humble heart. Oh, for diligence and steadiness in\nthe path of duty, a due sense of our own weakness and inability, of\nthe Lord's power and all-sufficiency, and firm faith in the same. Give\nmy love to ----, she is the Lord's: her heavenly Father mingles her\ncup; not one unnecessary bitter drop shall be put into it; bid her\ntrust in the Lord; the time, the set time for deliverance shall come.\nI can witness, with many thousands on earth, and an innumerable\ncompany in heaven, that he is the best of masters. I have suffered\nmuch, yet not one word of all that he has said has failed. I expect to\nsuffer more; but whatever bitter draughts may yet await me, I would\nnot give one drop of my heavenly Father's mixing for oceans of what\nthe world styles felicity.\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Under another date she adds:\n\n \"When we trace the tenderness of our Daysman's conduct through\nthe whole of his tabernacling here below, and add to this the many\ngracious words which he spoke, and to these again what were spoken by\nthe disciples by his authority, can we refuse to cast all our burdens\non him, and to trust him with ourselves and them? You know how sweet\nit is, in the time of tumultuous distress, when the spirit is\noverwhelmed, when God's mercy seems clean gone for ever, and his\npromise to fail, how sweet to get even a lean upon the Saviour; but\nwhen he, as he does at times, takes the soul out of itself, and away\nfrom forebodings, reasonings, and suppositions, to his own divine\nattributes, and gives it a believing view of its interest in them all,\nin his wisdom as unerring, his power as almighty, his goodness as\nboundless, his faithfulness unchanging; when we add to these his\nhumanity, and consider that our High-priest was in all points tempted\nas we are, yet without sin, and that he has a feeling for our\ninfirmities; when we find him listening to every petition--a widowed\nmother for her son--the centurion for his servant--weeping with two\nsisters over a brother's grave--embracing and blessing the little\nchildren whom mothers, like you and me, pressed through the crowd, in\nspite of the reprehensions of disciples, to present to him--accepting\nthe effusions of Magdalene's penitent heart with tender consolation, O\nhow near does this bring the Divinity to us, and how sweetly may we\nconfide in such tenderness. Oh my friend, He rests in his love. Let us\nrest in our confidence. All shall be well.\"\n\n\n When Dr. Witherspoon visited Scotland in the year 1785, he had\nfrequent conversations with Mrs. Graham on the subject of her removal\nto America. She gave him at this time some reason to calculate on her\ngoing thither as soon as her children should have completed the course\nof education she had proposed for them. She had entertained a strong\npartiality for America ever since her former residence there, and had\nindulged a secret expectation of returning. It was her opinion, and\nthat of many pious people, that America was the country where the\nchurch of Christ would preeminently flourish. She was therefore\ndesirous to leave her offspring there.\n\n After some correspondence with Dr. Witherspoon, and consultation\nwith pious friends, her plan received the approbation of the latter;\nand having had an invitation from many respectable characters in the\ncity of New York, with assurances of patronage and support, she\narranged her affairs for quitting Edinburgh. The Algerines being then\nat war with the United States, her friends insisted on her chartering\na small British vessel to carry herself and family to the port of New\nYork. This increased her expenses; but Providence, in faithfulness and\nmercy, sent her at this time a remittance from Dr. Henderson, the\nyoung friend of Dr. Graham, who succeeded him as surgeon of the\nregiment; and a legacy of two hundred pounds bequeathed her by Lady\nGlenorchy, as a mark of her regard, was now of great use to her.\n\n Thus in the month of July, 1789, Mrs. Graham once more prepared\n_to go into a land which the Lord seemed to tell her of_.\n\n The two following extracts from her private journal, indicate the\nstate of her mind and heart previous to leaving Edinburgh.\n\n\n \"EDINBURGH, March, 1789.\n\n \"Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them alive; and\nlet thy widows trust in me,' Jer. 49: 11; the Lord's promise, which he\nmade to me in the days of my widowhood, and which I have made the\nsubject of my prayers from day to day, taking the words in a spiritual\nsense. The Lord has done wonders for me and mine since the day I was\nleft a widow with three orphans, and the fourth not born, in a strange\nland, without money, at a distance from friends; or rather, without\nfriends. Hitherto he has supplied all my wants, and laid to hand every\nnecessary and many comforts; supporting character and credit, making a\nway for me through the wilderness, pointing out my path, and settling\nthe bounds of my habitation.\n\n \"For all these blessings I desire to be grateful to the God of\nprovidence, whose is the earth and the fulness thereof; but these I\ncannot take as the substance of the promise; neither have they been\nthe chief matter of my prayers. The salvation and the life I have\nwrestled for, is that which Christ died to purchase, and lives to\nbestow--even spiritual life, and salvation from sin. My God knows I\nhave held fast this view of the words, seeking first the kingdom of\nGod for my children, leaving temporals to be given or withheld, as may\nbest suit with the conversion and sanctification of their souls. I\nhave not asked for them health, beauty, riches, honor, or temporal\nlife: God knows what share of these consists with their better\ninterests; let him give or withhold accordingly. One thing I have\nasked of the Lord, one thing only, and will persist in asking, trust\nin him for, and for which I think I have his promise--even the life of\ntheir and my soul. 1 Thess. 5:23, is my petition for me and mine;\nverse 24, my anchor of hope, preceded by Jeremiah 49:11.\"\n\n \"EDINBURGH, March 17, 1789.\n\n \"This day from the head of his own table did the Lord, by his\nservant Mr. R----, proclaim his name the I AM, and called on me to\nwrite under what I would, for time and eternity. My soul rejoices that\nGod is, and that he is what he is; nothing less than himself can\ncontent me, nothing more do I desire.\n\n \"This great I AM is my portion--what can I ask beside? He hath\nopened my eyes to see his excellency; he hath determined my will, to\nchoose him for my portion. He hath arranged and set in order a rich\ntestament sealed by the blood of his own Son, containing every\nblessing for time and for eternity. All my heart's desire is there\npromised, and faith given to believe there shall be a full\nperformance. What have I to say then, but, Amen, do as thou hast\nsaid? Father, glorify thy name. Thou hast said, 'Then will I\nsprinkle clean water upon you, and ye shall be clean; from all your\nfilthiness and from all your idols will I cleanse you. A new heart\nalso will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you; and I\nwill take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give\nyou a heart of flesh; and I will put my Spirit within you, and cause\nyou to walk in my statutes, and ye shall keep my judgments and do\nthem. And ye shall dwell in the land that I gave to your fathers:\nand ye shall be my people, and I will be your God.' Amen; Lord, do\nas thou hast said. Behold, I take hold of thy covenant for myself\nand for my children. It is well ordered in all things, and it is\nsure. My heart accords to every part of it. Wilt thou guide us by\nthy counsel while we live, and afterwards receive us to thy glory?\nAmen and amen--do as thou hast said.\n\n \"If we forsake thy laws, and go astray; if we depart from thee\nand break thy commandments, wilt thou visit our faults with rods, and\nour sins with chastisements. Blessed promise; amen, Lord, do as thou\nhast said: seeing thy loving-kindness is secured to us, and thou wilt\nnot cast us off from being thy people, nor alter that which thou hast\nspoken; wilt thou keep us as the apple of thine eye? wilt thou cover\nus with the shadow of thy wing? Art thou my Husband? art thou the\nFather of my fatherless children? wilt thou be the stay of these\norphans, and their and my shield in a strange land? wilt thou perfect\nwhat concerns us? wilt thou care for us? wilt thou _never leave us,\nnever forsake us_? in the valley of the shadow of death shall thy\nrod and staff support us? What can thy servant say but, Amen, do as\nthou hast said.\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER IV.\n\n SCHOOL IN NEW YORK--DEATH OF HER PASTOR\n DR. JOHN MASON--LAST NEWS OF HER SON.\n\n MRS. GRAHAM, after a pleasant though tedious voyage, landed in\nNew York on the 8th day of September, 1789, where she and her family\nwere received with the greatest cordiality and confidence. The late\nRev. Dr. Rodgers and Rev. Dr. John Mason were especially kind to her.\nShe came eminently prepared to instruct her pupils in all the higher\nbranches of female education; and the favorable change effected by her\nexertions was soon visible in the minds, manners, and accomplishments\nof the young ladies committed to her care. She opened her school on\nthe 5th of October, 1789, with five scholars, and before the end of\nthe same month the number increased to fifty. She not only imparted\nknowledge to her pupils, but also, by her conversation and example,\nprepared their minds to receive it in such a manner as to apply it to\npractical advantage. While she taught them to regard external\naccomplishments as ornaments to the female character, she was careful\nto recommend the practice of virtue as the highest accomplishment of\nall, and to inculcate the principles of religion as the only solid\nfoundation for morality and virtue. The annual examinations of her\nscholars were always well attended, and gave great satisfaction.\nGeneral Washington while at New York honored her with his patronage.\nThe venerable and amiable Bishop of the Episcopal church in the state\nof New York, then the Rev. Dr. Benjamin Moore, was never once absent\nfrom those examinations. She was sensible of his friendship, and\nalways spoke of him in terms of great esteem and respect.\n\n She united in communion with the church under the pastoral care\nof the Kev. Dr. Mason. This excellent man was her faithful friend and\nwise counsellor. Under his ministry her two daughters, Joanna and\nIsabella, joined the church in the year 1791. Her eldest daughter\nJessie, who had made a profession of religion in Scotland, was married\nin July, 1790, to Mr. Hay Stevenson, merchant of New York, and she\nbecame a member of the church under the care of Dr. Rodgers, where her\nhusband attended.\n\n In the year 1791 her son, who had been left in Scotland to\ncomplete his education, paid his mother a visit. Mrs. Graham,\nconsidering herself as inadequate to the proper management of a son,\nhad at an early period of his life sent him to the care of a friend,\nwho had promised to pay due attention to his morals and education. The\nboy had a warm affectionate heart, but possessed, at the same time, a\nbold and fearless spirit. Such a disposition, under proper management,\nmight have been formed into a noble character; but he was neglected,\nand left in a great measure to himself by his first preceptor.\n\n For two years of his life he was under the care of Mr. Murray,\nteacher of an academy at Abercorn. He was a man truly qualified for\nhis station. He instructed his pupils with zeal; led even their\namusements; and to an exemplary piety added the faithful counsel of\na friend. He loved, and was therefore beloved. Under his\nsuperintendence John Graham improved rapidly, and gained the\naffections of his teacher and companions. Happy for him had he\ncontinued in such a suitable situation. He was removed to Edinburgh\nto receive a more classical education. Being left there by his\nmother and sisters, the impetuosity of his temper and a propensity\nfor a sea-faring life induced his friends to place him as an\napprentice in the merchant-service. He was shipwrecked on the coast\nof Holland, and Mr. Gibson of Rotterdam, a friend of Mrs. Graham,\ntook him to his house, and enabled him to come to the United States.\nHe remained at New York for some months. His mother deemed it his\nduty to return to Scotland to complete his time of service. He\nevidently inclined to the profession of a sailor; she therefore\nfitted him out handsomely, and he embarked for Greenock in the same\nship with Mr. John M. Mason, the only son of Dr. John Mason, who\nwent to attend the theological lectures at the Divinity Hall\nin Edinburgh.\n\n The following extract shows the anguish of Mrs. Graham's mind in\nparting with her son, and how she cast him upon the covenant mercy of\nher God, placing a blank, as to temporal things, in her Lord's hand,\nbut holding on with a fervent faith and hope to the promise of\nspiritual life.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, May 20, 1791.\n\n \"This day my only son left me in bitter wringings of heart: he is\nagain launched on the ocean, God's ocean. The Lord saved him from\nshipwreck, brought him to my home, and allowed me once more to indulge\nthe yearning of my heart over him. Short has been the time he has been\nwith me, and ill have I improved it: he is gone from my sight, and my\nheart bursts with tumultuous grief. Lord, have mercy on the widow's\nson--'the only son of his mother, and she a widow,'\n\n \"I ask nothing in all this world for him: I repeat my\npetition--save his soul alive; give him salvation from sin. It is not\nthe danger of the seas that distresses me; it is not the hardships he\nmust undergo; it is not the dread of never seeing him more in this\nworld: it is because I cannot discern the fulfilment of the promise in\nhim. I discern not the new birth nor its fruits, but every symptom of\ncaptivity to Satan, the world, and self-will. This, O this is what\ndistresses me: and in connection with this, his being shut out from\nordinances, at a distance from Christians; and shut up with those who\nforget God, profane his name, and break his Sabbaths.\n\n \"O Lord, many wonders hast thou shown me; thy ways of dealing\nwith me and mine have not been common; add this wonder to the rest:\ncall, convert, regenerate, and establish a sailor in the faith. Lord,\nall things are possible with thee: glorify thy Son, and extend his\nkingdom by sea and land; take the prey from the strong. I roll him\nover upon thee. Many friends try to comfort me; miserable comforters\nare they all. Thou art the God of consolation; only confirm to me thy\ngracious word, on which thou causedst me to hope in the day when thou\nsaidst to me, 'Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them\nalive.' Only let this life be a spiritual life, and I put a blank in\nthy hand as to all temporal things. 'I wait for thy salvation.' Amen.\"\n\n\n Three months afterwards she learned that a press-gang had boarded\nthe ship in which her son was, and although he was saved from their\ngrasp by a stratagem of the passengers, yet all his effects were taken\naway from him. In the following reflections on this event, the anxious\nmother shows that she would not withdraw the blank she had put into\nher Redeemer's hands.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, August 18, 1791.\n\n \"Thus far the Lord hath tried me, and kept me to my choice.\nThis night I have tidings, through a letter to Dr. Mason, that my\nson has been seized by the press-gang. Through God's help, he\nescaped; but all his assortment of necessaries that his sisters and\nI made up with so much care, labor, and expense, they have carried\noff, and he is once more left naked. Satan and a corrupt heart unite\nin tempting me to complain. Dare I utter a word or harbor a\nmurmuring thought? Would I withdraw the blank I have put into the\nRedeemer's hand? Has he not hitherto done all things well? Have not\nmy own afflictions been my greatest blessings? Have not I asked for\nmy children their mother's portion? Has not God chiefly made use of\nafflictions as means of hedging me in, and shutting me up to my\nchoice of this portion, as well as showing me that He is a\nsufficient portion without any other? When matters have been at the\nworst with me as to this world, my triumphs in God have been\nhighest, and prospects for eternity brightest.\n\n \"Has the Lord given me in some measure victory over the world? Do\nits honors, riches, and gaudy splendor appear to me empty and vain,\nand not worth an anxious thought? Does provision of food and raiment\nby the way through this wilderness seem all that is necessary? and is\nit my wish, as well as form of prayer, that the Lord may give that in\nkind and degree which he sees fittest for me? And shall I covet that\nfor my child which I despise for myself? Alas, Lord, it is because he\nfeeds not on better things, and sometimes I fear he has no better\nportion. Still, still foolish. Was it when I was full, or when in\nwant, that I returned to my heavenly Father? Do I desire, have I asked\nand persisted in asking for my children, salvation from sin and self?\nDo I anxiously wish them to reach and to surpass my present measure of\nsubmission and resignation to thy will--to enjoy God in all things,\nand nothing without him? And shall I, dare I complain when I see the\nLord making use of the same means which first brought me to myself,\nand recovered me also from numberless backslidings since I first\ntasted the blessedness of his chosen?\n\n \"Lord, I renew my blank. I afresh roll them all over upon thee. I\nwill try to look on, in the faith that all things shall work together\nfor good to their souls, and that I shall yet see the day, or if I see\nit not, that it will come, when they shall bow at thy footstool, sink\ninto the open arms of thy mercy in Christ, melted down in holy,\nhumble, acquiescing, cordial submission to thy severest dealings with\nthem; when thou shalt put a new song into their mouths, and they shall\nsing as I do now, It hath been very good for me that I have been\nafflicted. I wait for thy salvation. Amen.\"\n\n\n Again we mark her trust in God in the more common events of life,\nand her gratitude in the reception of blessings from his hand.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, September, 1791.\n\n \"Many have been my burdens of late; strangers laid upon me to\nprovide for, even when I thought I had not sufficient to give to all\ntheir due and provide for my own family. But what is that to me? the\nLord increases business, lays more largely to hand, bears me and my\nburdens, provides for me and strangers. Lord, it is all well: give\nwhen thou wilt, and call for it again when and for what purpose thou\nwilt; it is thine own. I am thine, and all that thou givest me is\nthine; the world calls it mine, but I call it thine. If it be thy\nwill, lead me in a plain path, or if thou lead me by a way which I\nknow not, hold up my goings, so shall I be in peace and safety\nstill. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, October 10, 1791.\n\n \"This day did the Lord's sent servant, in a solemn manner, take\nus all to witness, and call in the witness of angels, that we had once\nmore avouched ourselves to be the Lord's, and that once more Christ\nand his salvation had been offered to all within the walls. This same\nday, for the second time, have my two daughters sat down at the\nRedeemer's table among his professing people, and, I have reason to\nthink, given their hearty assent to his covenant.\n\n \"Glory, glory, glory, to the hearer of prayer. I have cast my\nfatherless children on the Lord, and he has begun to make good my\nconfidence. _One thing_, one only thing have I asked for them,\nleaving every thing else to be bestowed or withheld as consisting with\nthat: I seek for my four children and myself, first of all, _the\nkingdom of God_.\n\n \"My God from day to day adds many other comforts, and strengthens\nmy hopes by promising appearances, that _the grain of mustard\nseed_ is sown in the hearts of my three daughters. They have joined\nthemselves to the people of God, and I have reason to think the Lord\nhas ratified their surrender of themselves to him; he has made them\nwilling for the time, and he will hedge them in to the choice they\nhave made.\n\n \"Saturday, September, 1791, the Lord made me a grandmother,\nassisted my poor weakly girl, and gave a son to her and my arms.\n'There was joy that a man-child was born into the world,' and\naccording to that word 'she remembered no more the anguish.'\n\n \"Thanks be to God for this salvation; but, Lord, this is but a\nsmall thing with thee. Look, O look on this twig from a guilty stock;\npoor, helpless, feeble creature, it can do nothing for its body, and\nstill less for its soul. O God of _the spirits of all flesh_,\ngive it a plunge in _the blood of Jesus_--cleanse, O cleanse him\nfrom original sin, and now, even now, in thy own sovereign and\nmysterious way, sow _the grain of mustard seed_ in his soul.\"\n\n\n In the spring of 1792, Mrs. Graham and her family were called to\na severe trial by the translation of their beloved pastor, Dr. Mason,\nto a better world. A few months before his decease, while preaching to\nhis people, his recollection failed, his sermon was gone from his\nmind, and he sat down in his pulpit unable to proceed. After a short\npause, he arose and addressed his people in a pious and affectionate\nstrain; he considered this event as a call from his heavenly Master to\nexpect a speedy dismission from the earth, and solemnly admonished\nthem also to be prepared for the will of God. His people, who loved\nhim, were affected to tears. An illness soon followed, which\nterminated in the death of the body. He departed on the night when\nMrs. Graham took her turn of watching with him, and she closed his\neyes, which she always accounted a privilege and honor bestowed upon\nher by her divine Master. But this tender and affecting scene is best\ndescribed in a letter which she wrote to her sympathizing friend Mrs.\nWalker, of Edinburgh.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, April, 1792, Sabbath noon.\n\n \"MY DEAR MADAM--It is not my custom to take my pen on this day\neven to write to a Christian friend, having occasion for the whole\ntime with my family or in secret with my God; but I cannot go to\ndinner, I cannot eat, I cannot talk to my girls; my heart must bleed\nafresh on the same altar upon which it has often been pierced. O,\nmadam, my dear Dr. Mason goes, and leaves me here alone: in all\nprobability his course is nearly finished, and his crown awaits him.\nFive physicians now attend him closely. I have seen him often, and he\nsays, 'All is well, all will be well,' Of the physicians he said,\n'Yes, yes, it is very well; they are useful men in God's hand; they\nmay be instrumental in patching up the tabernacle a little. If it be\nraised to usefulness, I am content; if not to usefulness, I do not\ndesire it. I feel no concern about the issue of this; the will of the\nLord be done.'\n\n \"I say, Amen; but Oh, I feel alone. I should need large\ncommunications from his Master to fill up this blank. I cannot write\nfor weeping; now my face is so swelled I cannot go to church. I called\nat his house this morning, found the doctors in the parlor, and\nlearned from them the worst. The bell was ringing for church. I\nstifled as much as possible my grief; would fain have come home to\ngive it vent, but durst not be absent from the house of God. I heard a\nstranger in Dr. Rodgers' church; our doors are closed; his text was,\n'Henceforth I call you not servants, but friends;' he ran the parallel\nbetween human friendship and that subsisting between Christ and his\ndisciples. I ought to be comforted, nay, I am comforted.\n\n \"The Bible lies open before me; it is full of consolation; but\nall is in prospect. I look at God, what he is in himself, what he is\nto his people _now_ and what he will be to _eternity_: the\nconsolations of hope are mine; but for the present, I feel like the\nsparrow on the house-top, or like a pelican in the wilderness; and\nwhen I think on my years and the robustness of my constitution, and\nthat I may have a long journey before me, I am not able to look at it.\nAt the same time, when I consider my children, who, having lost their\npastor, who bore them on his heart to the throne of grace, have double\nneed of a mother, I dare not indulge a wish, far less put up a\npetition for release. O, that I could get under the influence of that\nspirit which I have witnessed in my dear pastor--that entire\nconfidence in God--that perfect resignation to his will--that\ncomplacency in all he has done, is doing, or will do--that rest in\nGod, of which he seems to be put in possession even now, while his\nbreast is laboring and heaving like a broken bellows, and he cannot\nfetch one full breath. O, what cannot God effect.\n\n \"SUNDAY EVENING. I have again seen my dear pastor, and discern\nthe clay dissolving fast. The words of dying saints are precious, and\nhis are few. He thus accosted me: 'I am just waiting the will of God;\nfor the present I seem a useless blank in his hand; I can say very\nlittle; be not too anxious for my life, but transfer your care to the\nchurch; my life or death is but a trifle; if the Lord have any use for\nme, it is easy for him to raise me up still; and if he do, it will be\nagreeable to observe his hand distinct from men; if he should not, you\nwill all be cared for; leave all to him and seek his glory.' He could\nsay no more, nor will I to-night, but address myself to our Lord on\nhis behalf, yours, my own, and our dear concerns.\n\n \"Several days have elapsed since I last wrote; our dear doctor\nstill lives, often recruits, and again is reduced; but man can do no\nmore; my last page, before the vessel sails, shall be of him.\n\n \"As to myself and family, we are as the Lord would have it with\nus, and I make no doubt as we need. Business very full; a house full\nof boarders, and about sixty scholars. I begin to feel the effects of\nfatigue or age, I know not which. The almond-tree flourishes; those\nthat look out at the windows begin to be darkened; but the keepers of\nthe house stand firm, and all the wheels and springs discharge their\noffice, though more heavily; there is no judging of my days by present\nappearances. Well, let me once more return to my rest--_God_;\ncommit my way to him, who shall bring to pass what is best, and in the\nend shall complete my happiness.\n\n \"APRIL 23, MONDAY. It is finished. My dear minister's bitter\ndraught is over. On Thursday, the 19th of this month, a quarter before\nten o'clock, A.M., the Lord received his spirit and laid his weary\nflesh to rest. He had a sore conflict with the king of terrors, who\nseemed allowed to revel through every part of his mortal frame: his\nlegs were mortified to his knees; he had not been able to lie down for\nfour weeks, and died in his chair. Like his Master, he groaned, but\nnever complained: he had a draught of his Master's cup, but the bitter\ningredient _desertion_ made no part of it. I had the honor to\nclose his dear eyes, and to shut those dear lips from whence so many\nprecious truths have proceeded, and to mix with the ministering\nspirits who attended to hail the released. This honor I had desired,\nbut did not reckon myself worthy, and hardly hoped for it; but the\nLord saw the wish, though never formed into a petition, and indulged\nme. I bless him for it. And now, farewell human friendships; let me\ngird up the loins of my mind, and run with patience the little\nfurther, looking unto Jesus, and following also him my pastor, 'who,\nthrough faith and patience, now inherits the promises.'\n\n \"This is a great work finished. Dr. Mason was 'a city set on a\nhill.' He was with the army during all the war after the evacuation of\nNew York; had great influence over the soldiers; preached the gospel\nof peace uniformly, but never meddled with politics, though he was\nfully capable. In every situation the Lord supported him in uniformity\nand consistency of character, and carried him through without a single\nspot or stain. Glory to God in the highest for this repeated proof of\nhis faithfulness. 'Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright, for\nthe end of that man is peace.'\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Great was the grief of Dr. Mason's congregation on his removal.\nIn him, to great learning were united meekness, prudence, diligence,\nand knowledge of the world, and an affectionate superintendence of the\ninterests, spiritual and temporal, of his flock. He so arranged his\navocations and studies in regard to time, that he had always a few\nhours in the afternoon to devote to visiting the families of his\ncongregation. So regular was the order he observed, that Mrs. Graham\nand her family knew when to calculate on seeing him, and always\nexpected him with the anticipation of profit and pleasure. Once every\nweek they were sure of seeing him, if in health. His visits were\nshort, his conversation serious, awakening, instructive, and\naffectionate. He inquired about their temporal affairs, and in cases\nof difficulty gave them his best advice. His counsels were salutary;\nhis knowledge of the world and his discrimination of character\nrendered him well qualified to advise. In one of his visits to Mrs.\nGraham she mentioned to him the want of good servants as one of her\ntrials. \"Mrs. Graham,\" said he, \"have you ever prayed to the Lord to\nprovide good servants for you? Nothing which interests our comfort is\ntoo minute for the care of our heavenly Father.\"\n\n To one of her daughters, who felt a strong inclination to profess\nher faith in Christ by joining the communion of his church, but yet\nwas afraid that her heart was not sufficiently engaged for the service\nof God, Dr. Mason proposed the following question: \"If,\" said he, \"the\nworld, with all its wealth, pleasures, and power, were placed in one\nscale, and Christ alone in the other, which would your heart freely\nchoose as a portion?\" On her replying there would be no hesitation as\nto her choice of Christ, he gave her encouragement to profess her\nfaith, although it might not at present amount to the full assurance\nof hope.\n\n He was indeed a faithful shepherd of his flock, and his people\nmourned for him as for an affectionate father. It is much to be\ndesired that his example were more followed by Christian pastors. To\npreach with eloquence and acceptance is a talent of great value in a\nminister of the gospel; this makes him respected, and his congregation\nadmire him, because, for one reason, they are proud of him; but to\ngain their affections, to make a congregation the children of an aged\npastor, or the friends and brethren of a younger one, let the minister\nvisit the families of his people; this will seal on their hearts the\nregard which their understandings had already dictated.\n\n Very few ministers have been more remarkable for a strict\nattention to this duty, than the late Dr. John Mason and his venerable\nand attached friend Dr. Rodgers. When the former died, the latter\nexclaimed, \"I feel as if I had lost a right arm.\"\n\n The congregation, bereaved of their pastor, wrote immediately to\nhis son, the late Rev. Dr. John Mitchell Mason, to hasten his return\nfrom Edinburgh to New York; and after preaching to them with great\nacceptance for several months, he was ordained and installed pastor of\nthe church in April, 1793. Mrs. Graham entertained for him the most\naffectionate attachment, and this attachment was reciprocal.\n\n At this date we find some of Mrs. Graham's delightful\ndevotional exercises.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, 1793.\n\n \"Blessed Lord, thou hast, to the praise of thy grace, given me\nthe heritage of them that fear thy name; thou hast prepared my heart\nto pray, and inclined thine ear to hear; thou hast drawn me into thy\nfold, and hast fed me in thy green pastures. I rejoice in Israel's\nShepherd; not one of his flock shall be lost. Often have I wandered\nfrom his presence and sought pasture among the swine, but my Shepherd\nhas ever drawn or driven me back. He has a rod and I have felt it; but\nI bless the hand and kiss the rod.\n\n \"O, how wonderful to look back and see 'all the way by which he\nhas led me, to prove me, to try me, to show me what was in my heart,\nthat he might do me good at my latter end.' Amen, my God, I leave\nmyself in thy hands. I should lose myself; but thou wilt keep me from\nfoes without and foes within. What then have I to care for? My\nShepherd careth for all; he slumbers not nor sleeps, and he will\nperfect what concerns me; of this I am as sure as that I now write it.\n\n \"The law of thy mouth is better unto me than gold and silver. O\nhow I love thy law, it is my meditation all the day. Thou, through thy\ncommandments--or the whole of thy truth--hast made me wiser than my\nteachers. The law of God makes the simple wise. How sweet are thy\nwords unto my taste, yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth. Through thy\nprecepts I get understanding, therefore I hate every false way. 'Thy\nword is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.' How safe, how\nhappy are they who are taught by the word of God. 'Blessed art thou,\nSimon Barjona, for flesh and blood hath not taught thee this, but my\nFather who is in heaven.'\n\n \"O my children, enrich your minds with a full acquaintance with\nthe word of God; lay it up in your memories, when you can do nothing\nmore; be assured, if ever you are made wise unto salvation, it must be\nby this word; if ever you are taught of God, he will teach you by the\nwords contained in the Bible. 'Search the Scriptures, for they are\nthey which testify of me;' search the Scriptures, for in them are\ncontained the words of eternal life. 'Be followers of them who,\nthrough faith and patience, now inherit the promises.'\n\n \"Holy David went forward, heavenward, improving in the knowledge\nof God, of himself, and of God's plan of salvation for ruined sinners,\nby studying the word, the works, and the providences of God, but\nchiefly the word of God; praying for, watching for the influences of\nGod's Spirit on his judgment and thinking powers: it was by this that\nhe became wiser than his teachers. He was a king, and had the cares of\nthe nation to occupy his mind; he was a man of war, and had that art\nto study. But O, the privilege of the Christian! he goes through every\npart, even of his earthly way, leaning upon God. David could say, even\nof war, 'The Lord teaches my hands to war, and my fingers to fight.'\n'The Lord subdued the people under me.' In temporals and in\nspirituals, he is my shield, my strength, my buckler, my strong\ntower.' I shall not fear what man can do unto me.' 'In Judah's land\nGod is well known; there he brake the spear, the bow, and the battle.'\nHe ascribes all to God. We hear nothing of his own wisdom, his\ndisciplined armies, his order of battle and warlike powers, though\nattention to all these was his duty, and not neglected by him. He\ndevoted all his natural talents to God; he exercised them diligently,\nbut still he knew and acted under the influence of that knowledge,\nthat unless the Lord build the house, the builders lose their pains;\nunless the Lord keep the city, the watchmen watch in vain. He, as well\nas worldly men, chose the means best adapted to the end proposed. Let\nnatural men assert, and let it be admitted, that David knew better how\nto use a sling and a stone, than mail, helmet, and sword; therefore he\nchose them. But follow David until he meets the hostile foe. Do we\nhear a word of his art as a slinger, as a marksman? though we may\nsuppose he was expert at both. 'Thou comest to me with a sword, a\nspear, and a shield; but I come in the name of the Lord of hosts, the\nGod of the armies of Israel whom thou hast defied; and this assembly\nshall know that the Lord saveth not with sword and spear'--these are\nnot essential--'for the battle is the Lord's, and he will give you\ninto our hands.'\n\n \"How comfortably might Christians go through life did they walk\nwith God in their daily business and occupations, carefully observing\nthe leadings of Providence, cautiously avoiding either running before\nor lagging behind; but in all things making their requests known to\nGod; at all times committing their way to him, being careful about\nnothing, but to use with diligence the means of grace, and also the\nmeans of acquiring the good things of life, leaving the issues of both\nto God, in the full assurance that what is good the Lord will give.\n'Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and\nverily thou shalt be fed.' In spirituals and in temporals, 'the hand\nof the diligent maketh rich.' Be 'not slothful in business, fervent in\nspirit, serving the Lord.'\n\n \"Lord, teach me thy law graciously, in all its perfection, its\nextent, order, beauty, and harmony, and grant me all the assistance\nprovided to enable a lost, depraved, corrupted child of Adam, to set\nout in thy good ways, to go forward, and to finish in the same course;\nand all the consolation, joy, and peace which thou hast provided to be\nenjoyed in a measure even here, and to be perfected in the world to\ncome. Amen.\n\n \"'O Israel, return unto the Lord, for thou hast fallen by thine\niniquity.' Hos. 14. Yes, fallen, O how fallen from God the only good,\nthe fountain of happiness. Lost his image, which was the glory of man\nin paradise. Lost that sweet complacency and delight in his\nperfections and attributes which innocence enjoyed. Lost rectitude of\nreason and judgment. No longer can we judge of excellence, no longer\nlove what God loves. Our wills no longer straight with his will, but\ncrooked, opposing God, and choosing evil instead of good. 'O Israel,\nthou hast destroyed thyself, but in me is thy help.' Amen, says my\nsoul, in thee is my help.\"\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, October 3, 1793.\n\n \"'One shall say, I am the Lord's, and another shall call himself\nby the name of Jacob; and another shall subscribe with his hand unto\nthe Lord, and surname himself by the name of Israel.' Isaiah 44:5.\n\n \"I, as one, subscribe to the truth of all that God has said: I,\nas one, subscribe my assent to all he has done. I set my amen to his\nwell-ordered covenant, well-ordered in all things, and sure. And this\nis the covenant, even Christ, the sum and substance, for he hath given\nhim to be a covenant of the people. The whole and every part of it is\nGod's covenant. To me it must be a testament, the new testament in\nChrist's blood. To me it must be a covenant of gifts and promises. I\ncan be no party, having nothing to give; nothing with which to\ncovenant. He hath said, 'Thou hast destroyed thyself, but in me is thy\nhelp.' Amen. Be my help, my deliverer.\n\n \"'Look unto me, all ye ends of the earth, and be saved; for I am\nGod, and there is none else.' I do look unto thee alone for salvation.\nThou art God; there is none else: besides thee there is no Saviour.\n\n \"'I will pour water on the thirsty, and floods on the parched\nground. I will pour my Spirit upon thy seed, and my blessing upon thy\noffspring.' Amen. I yield my soul into thy hand, dry and parched, to\nreceive thy showers of reviving, quickening, fructifying grace.\"\n\n\n Writing about this date to her beloved friend Mrs. O---- of\nEdinburgh, Mrs. Graham, for the encouragement of her friend, gives\nher, in confidence, the following record of her own Christian\nexperience:\n\n\n \"It is now. I think, thirty-five years since I simply, but\nsolemnly, accepted of the Lord's Christ, as God's gift to a lost\nworld. I rolled my condemned, perishing, corrupted soul upon this\nJesus, exhibited in the gospel as a Saviour from sin. My views then\nwere dark compared with what they now are: but this I remember, that\nat the time I felt heart-satisfying trust in the mercy of God, as the\npurchase of Christ; and for a time rejoiced with joy scarce\nsupportable, singing almost continually the 103d Psalm.\n\n \"I took a view of the promises of God, and wrote out many of\nthem, and called them mine; and among the foremost was that in Psalm\n89:30-33; and well has the Lord kept me to it, and made it good: for,\nmy dear friend, never was there a more unsteady, unwatchful Christian;\nnever did the children of Israel's conduct in the wilderness depict\nany Christian's heart and conduct in the gospel times better than\nmine; and just so has the Lord dealt with me. When he slew me, then I\ntrusted in him; when he gave me carnal ease and comfort, I forgot my\nRock and rebelled. Often did I stumble too from legality, instead of\nlooking at my own weakness and impotence, and trusting wholly in my\nRedeemer's strength. I was wroth with myself, wondered at myself, and\nthought it impossible I could be as I had been. I made strong\nresolutions, yea, vows, and became a slave in means to hedge in this\nwandering, worldly, vain, flighty heart; but, alas, a few months found\nme where I was, with scarce a thought of God from morning to night;\nprayer huddled over in words that had no effect on my heart; and the\nfear of hell the chief restraint from sin or spur to duty. Then, in\ngeneral, the Lord had some affliction for me, which laid me afresh at\nhis feet, and made me take a fresh grasp of Christ, and a fresh view\nof his covenant: then again I felt safety, joy, peace, and happiness.\n\n \"Thus, by line upon line, by precept upon precept, aye, and by\nstripe upon stripe, he taught me that I could not walk a moment\nalone. This is now my fixed faith; and in proportion as I keep it in\nsight, I walk safely; but I still forget, and still stumble and\nstill fall; but I am lifted up and taught lesson after lesson; and I\nshall stumble and shall fall while sin is in me; but the last\nstumble shall come, and the last stripe shall be laid on, and the\nlast lesson taught, and that which concerns me shall be perfected.\nO, then shall I look back, and see 'all the way by which he has led\nme, to prove me and try me, and show me what was in my heart, that\nhe might do me good in my latter end.'\n\n \"I am often, even in this valley of darkness and ignorance,\nallowed this retrospective view; and am led to say not one word of\nall that he promised has failed. 'Hitherto the Lord hath helped, he\nhath been the guide of my youth, and even unto hoar hairs will he\nlead me;' and when he calls me to pass through the valley of the\nshadow of death, I shall even then fear no evil, for his rod and\nstaff shall support me; and I shall enter into the presence of my\nRedeemer, white and clean, dressed in his most perfect righteousness;\nangels and saints shall know me in this glorious robe; my Redeemer\nwill acknowledge me as his ransomed, and I shall be for ever with the\nLord.\"\n\n\n To Mr. A.D., Edinburgh.\n\n \"NEW YORK, 1793.\n\n \"I have just been reading over my dear friend's precious letters,\nand am refreshed anew by the same truths and uniform experience of\nevery Christian; which all amounts to this, that the Lord is the\nportion of his people, and that whom he loves, he loves to the end. My\nsoul melts with tenderness when I recollect my fellow-travellers in\nthe wilderness; those dear associates with whom I have so often taken\nsweet counsel; who so often comforted me with the same comforts with\nwhich they themselves were comforted. I am also led to recollect some\nwho have finished their warfare; some whose trials were sharp and\nlong, but who, through the same grace in which we trust, were\nsteadfast to the end; and now inherit a crown of life--the reward of\ngrace, not of debt.\n\n \"I rejoice to hear that your children are promising; I think it\nis the greatest comfort a parent can enjoy in this world. I have a\nlarge share of it in my three daughters; but my prodigal is not come\nto himself; he still feeds on husks, nor thinks of the plenty in his\nFather's house. I had great hopes last winter; I heard he had been\nvery ill in consequence of very severe treatment from his captain. The\nLord has been emptying him from vessel to vessel, and I have been\nwaiting the issue; but mine eyes almost fail. I have great hopes that\nGod's time of mercy will come. I am also satisfied that it will be the\nbest time; but still I cry, O how long? My dear friends, I think I\nwould recommend it to you to _keep your children about you_. No\nother had ever the influence over him that I had; and I regret that I\ndid not bring him with me.\n\n \"Our young Timothy, J.M., is a perfect champion for the gospel of\nJesus; the Lord has well girded him and largely endowed him; he walks\nclosely with God, and speaks and preaches like a Christian of long\nexperience: he was ordained about two months ago in his father's\nchurch, and a few weeks after married a lady of eminent piety, and\npreached all the day, both the Sabbath before and after: no levity, no\nnovelty appeared in word or gesture, which is not always the case with\nthe best at such times. There is probably no church in New York whose\ndiscipline is as strict, nor one which has so many communicants. He is\nreckoned a man of great talents and an orator; and many of even the\nidle and careless go to hear him.\n\n \"A few Sabbaths ago he preached from these words, 'I determined\nto know nothing among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified.'\nAfter proving that all the Scriptures, from the beginning of Genesis\nto the end of Revelation, pointed to Christ and his great work of\nredemption, and asserting that that sermon could not be called the\ngospel of which He was not the subject, he spoke home to his audience,\nand told them that this, through the aid of divine grace, was his firm\npurpose--to dwell on redeeming love. He was sure no subject would be\nwelcome to any Christian, where Christ was not to be found; nor would\nany such subject ever convert a sinner; and therefore, if any were\nabout to take their place there, expecting to hear any new or strange\nthing, let them not disappoint themselves. O, for a thankful heart;\nthe Lord has indeed done wonders for me and mine; and blessed be his\nname for his mercy also, that in a remarkable manner, by a strange\nconcurrence of circumstances, he hedged me in to become a member of\nthis congregation, where I am led and fed with the same truths which\nnourished my soul in Zion's gates at Edinburgh; and I am helped to\nsing the Lord's song in a foreign land. Often have I been tempted to\nhang my harp upon the willow, 'when Zion I thought on;' but this was,\nand sometimes still is my sin and ingratitude, for I ought to build\nhouses, and plant vineyards, and seek the good of the land; for he has\na small vineyard here, which he waters and cultivates, and I ought to\nlabor therein, and do whatsoever my hand findeth to do with diligence,\nand say, 'The earth is the Lord's, and the fulness thereof; heaven is\nhis throne, the earth his footstool,' and he fills all things and\nall places.\n\n \"'What aileth thee, Hagar?' O what a God of mercy is our God!\nOften has he hailed me in some such language: 'What aileth thee?' why\nis thy countenance sad? am I not better to thee than ten friends? Then\nhas he turned my heart to him, made me feel myself close to him; he\nhas suffered me to lean on his bosom, hang on his arm, and lisp out,\nAbba. At such blest moments I have thought the whole earth but one\npoint, and from that to heaven but one step, and the time between but\nas one moment; and my company here sufficient to satisfy me by the\nway. At such blest moments I felt perfect, full, entire satisfaction\nwith all that God is, all that he does; and could trust him fully with\nall my concerns, spiritual, temporal, and eternal. But, alas, by and\nby, like a peevish child, I began to fret, wish this, wish that;\ngrieve for this, grieve for that; fear this, fear that; stagger,\nstumble, fall. O what a God of patience and long-suffering. And O how\nrich that well-ordered covenant, that provides suitable grace for all\nthese unsteady seasons. It is my greatest consolation that the Lord\nknows it all. There are times when I cannot see him, but every moment\nhe sees me. I should fall off and leave him, but he holds me fast and\nnever leaves me. O blessed plan, where God secures us in safety, even\nfrom ourselves. We have not only destroyed ourselves, and he has been\nour help; but we are ever destroying ourselves, and still he renews\nthis help.\n\n \"Well, what shall we say? Father, glorify thy name, and let us\nlie in thy hand as clay in the potter's, till thou finish thy\nworkmanship, and fit us vessels of mercy, to be filled with happiness,\nwhen thou shalt have done thy good pleasure in us, and by us, in this\nworld, through the grace that is in Christ Jesus, who loved us, and\ngave himself for us; to whom be glory, honor, and praise in the church\nbelow, and in the general assembly above, now and ever. Amen.\n\n \"My love, my heart's love, to my dear Mrs. D----. I am ever your\naffectionate friend, in the bonds of the gospel,\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Early in 1793 Mrs. Graham heard, from a worthy clergyman at\nGreenock, who, at her request, paid attention to her son, that he had\nbeen very ill of a fever, and subsequently subject to epileptic fits.\nIn one of these he had fallen from the mast-head, and was rendered\nunfit for service for many months. The gentleman to whom he was\napprenticed, permitted him to leave. In these circumstances Mrs.\nGraham addressed to him the following letter:\n\n\n \"MY LONG-LOST BUT STILL DEAR SON--If this ever reach you, hearken\nto the voice of your mother, your only parent, and to the voice of God\nby her. O, my son, you have had a long race in the service of Satan;\nhe has kept you in bondage and made you his drudge. You are far\nadvanced in the broad way that leads to destruction--to that place of\nendless torment prepared for the devil and his angels, to which Satan\nis dragging you. He has even been seeking the destruction of your\nbody, that he might have you secure.\n\n \"O, my son, think. Has he proved a good master? What have you\nfound in his service? and has he not disappointed all your gayest\nhopes, and fed you with husks? Have you, my son, been happy? Are you\nnot obliged to drive away your own reflections? I know you are. Dare\nyou, my son, sit down and think over all the past, all the present,\nand look forward to the future with any degree of comfort? My son, you\ncannot. Hear then the word of the Lord; that Lord, that merciful Lord,\nwho has seen you in all your rebellion, heard every profane oath you\nmay have uttered, seen you rioting among the sons of Belial; yet what\nis his voice to you? O, my son, it is not, 'Bind him hand and foot,\nand cast him into the lake that burns with fire and brimstone; where\nthere is weeping, and wailing, and gnashing of teeth, where the worm\ndieth not, and the fire is not quenched.' No, my son, the door of\nmercy is still open to you; the Lord calls, 'O sinner, thou hast\ndestroyed thyself, but in me is thy help.' Only repent, so iniquity\nshall not prove your ruin.' 'Hearken unto me, ye stout-hearted, that\nare far from righteousness: I bring near my righteousness; it shall\nnot be far off, and my salvation shall not tarry.' 'Hear, and your\nsoul shall live.' 'Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be\nsaved'--saved from hell; saved from Satan and his snare; saved from\nthe force of corruption in your heart.\n\n \"I do not call upon you, my poor corrupt boy, to turn from sin\nand work righteousness in your own strength; this you can no more do\nthan the Ethiopian can change his skin; but I do call upon you to\nreceive the whole of God's salvation, and power to resist sin is a\nprincipal part of it. In God's word it is said, that the Lord gave\nChrist to be a covenant to the people: we have to covenant with him on\nour part; we are all poor, lost, miserable creatures, I as well as\nyou, by nature; but the Lord Christ is God's gift to sinners. All the\nother promises are made to those who have received and accepted of\nthis gift; but Christ himself is God's gift to sinners--to the chief\nof sinners--_to you, John Graham, by name_; and the Bible says,\nto as many as receive him, to them gives he power to become the sons\nof God. God gave Christ to become the price in our hand; we take this\ngift, and offer back, as the price of our redemption, his atoning\nsacrifice, his all-perfect righteousness; and on this ground we are\nentitled, by his own plan, which he prepared from first to last, to\nplead for the full accomplishment of all the promises in the Bible:\nfor the pardon of sin; yea, for an entire new nature.\n\n \"O, my son, open your Bible, go to your knees, look out words\nthere fit for your case; present them humbly before God, turn all the\npromises you find there, all the offers, all the calls, all the\ncommands, all the threatenings into prayer--for you of yourself can do\nnothing--and ask that God, for Christ's sake, may pour out on you the\nspirit of prayer. I know not how to have done; yet I well know, unless\nthe Lord soften your poor obdurate heart, it will still remain hard.\nO, my son, be willing to put it in his hand, to receive his salvation,\nand give yourself up to his guiding. I beg you will read with care the\n15th chapter of the gospel of Luke. The Lord spoke these parables to\nshow how very willing he is to receive returning sinners. Your mother\nand all your sisters are willing to follow his example; return to us,\nmy son. We will watch over you we will pray over you, and we will try,\nby every endearing method, to restore you not only to health, but to\ncomfort. Your sisters wish you to come; all your friends are willing\nto receive you; we will not upbraid you.\n\n \"Do, my dear, leave Greenock; come out to us by any way you can\nfind, I will pay your passage here; or if you can get to any port in\nAmerica, you can write me from that, and I will get you forwarded\nhere; and, after you are here, if you still wish to follow the sea, we\ncan get you a berth in some trading vessel from this. All your friends\nhere send best wishes. And now, my son, I commend you to the Lord. O,\nthat he may bless this to you,\n\n \"Your affectionate mother,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n The last intelligence that Mrs. Graham received of her\nunfortunate son was in a letter from himself, dated Demarara, 1794, in\nwhich he states that he had sailed from Amsterdam in a Dutch vessel;\nwas taken by the French, and retaken by the English; had arrived at\nDemarara in the ship Hope; and should he not soon hear from his\nmother, would return to Europe with a fleet which was shortly to sail\nunder convoy. Mrs. Graham notices this event as follows:\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, February 20, 1794.\n\n \"This day I have a letter from my poor wanderer. It is more than\na year since I heard of him. Accept of my thanks, good and gracious\nLord. I feared his cup had been full, and he called out of the world\nwith all his sins on his own head; for I have no tidings of his\nturning from his sinful courses, or fleeing from the wrath to come, by\ntaking hold of the hope set before him.\n\n \"I bless thee, Oh, I bless thee, for thy sparing mercy, thy\nlong-suffering, thy patience, thy forbearance. Yea, even to him, thou\nhast been more than all this. Thou hast been his preserver, his\nprovider; thou hast watched over him in many imminent dangers, in the\ngreat deeps, in burning and in frozen climes.\n\n \"Thou hast followed him with thy preserving mercy and temporal\nbounty. He is still in the land of the living, and among those who are\ncalled to look unto thee and live. Still thou feedest my hopes of\nbetter things for him. Thou sufferest my prayers to lie on the table\nof thy covenant. I will trust, I will hope, I will believe, that in an\naccepted time thou wilt hear me, and in a day of thy power thou wilt\nbow his stubborn will, and lay him an humble suppliant at thy feet.\nOh, I trust thou wilt bring this poor prodigal to himself, and turn\nhis steps towards his Father's house. See how he feeds with the swine\nupon husks, and even these not his own. O turn his thoughts to his\n'Father's house, where there is bread enough, and to spare.'\n\n \"'Lord, remember thy gracious word, on which thou hast caused me\nto hope,' and which has ever been my comfort in the time of my\naffliction, and in my straits my only relief.\n\n \"He is again launched into thy great ocean. Lord, he is far from\nevery friend and from every means of grace, and for any thing I know,\nfar from thee by wicked works; under thy curse and hateful in thy\nsight; but thou, God, seest him. Means are not necessary, if thou\nwillest to work without. Thou canst find an avenue to his heart at\nonce. Dead as he is, vile as he is, guilty as he is, far from help of\nman, and in the most unlikely situation to receive the help of God,\nyet I know all these hinderances, all these mountains shall melt as\nwax at thy presence.\n\n \"Lord, I believe, thou knowest I believe, that if thou but speak\nthe word, this dead soul shall live; this vile, this guilty soul shall\nbe cleansed, shall be renewed, and my son be changed to an humble,\nthankful, genuine child of God, through the cleansing blood of\natonement, through the imputation of the Redeemer's righteousness and\nthe implantation of thy Spirit. I can do nothing for him, but thou\ncanst do all this. I wait for it, Lord, I wait for thy salvation.\nLord, let there be 'joy in heaven over this one sinner repenting.' I\nroll him on thee. I trust in thy sovereign, free, unmerited mercy in\nChrist. Amen.\"\n\n\n All inquiries instituted by kind friends respecting this son\nproved fruitless; and as a vessel named the Hope was some months after\nreported as having been taken by the French, it is perhaps probable\nthat he died in a French prison.\n\n Thus again had his afflicted mother to exercise faith and\nsubmission, not without hope towards God that the great Redeemer had\ntaken care of, and would finally save this prodigal son. She had known\na case in her father's family, which excited their solicitude and\nencouraged her hope. Her younger brother, Archibald Marshall, a lad of\nhigh temper, though possessed of an affectionate heart, had gone to\nsea, and was not heard of at all for several years. A pious woman, who\nkept a boarding-house in Paisley, found one of her boarders one day\nreading Doddridge's Rise and Progress of Religion in the Soul, with\nArchibald Marshall's name written on the blank leaf. On inquiry, the\nstranger told her that he got that book from a young man on his\ndeath-bed as a token of regard. That young man was Archibald Marshall;\nhe was an exemplary Christian, \"and I have reason,\" added he, \"to\nbless God that he ever was my mess-mate.\" The woman who heard this\naccount, transmitted it to Mr. Marshall's family, who were known to\nher. Mrs. Graham had no such consolatory account afforded to her; but\nunder much yearning of heart she left this concern, as well as every\nother, to the disposal of that God \"who doeth all things well.\"\n\n Again she sings of mercy in a sweet meditation.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, October 1, 1794\n\n \"'Return unto thy rest, O my soul, for the Lord hath dealt\nbountifully with thee.'\n\n \"Blessed be the Lord, for he hath showed me his marvellous\nloving-kindness in a strong city--Christ, the city of refuge.\n\n \"Thou hast given me my heart's desire, and hast not withholden\nthe request of my lips. 'One thing have I desired of the Lord,' and\nthrough life sought after for myself and the children whom thou hast\ngiven me; 'that all the days of our lives we might dwell in the house\nof the Lord,' behold his beauty, and inquire in his holy temple; that\nin the time of trouble he would hide us in his pavilion, in the secret\nof his tabernacle, and set our feet upon a rock.\n\n \"O thou incarnate God; thou blessed temple not made with hands;\nthou blessed pavilion, in which thy people hide in the time of\ntrouble, and are safe; thou Rock of ages, on which we build our hopes\nfor time and eternity, and defy the assaults of sin, Satan, and the\nworld: thou, Jehovah Jesus, art all these to thy people. Thou\nbroughtest them 'from a fearful pit and from the miry clay; thou\nsettest their feet upon this spiritual rock, and establishest their\ngoings; thou puttest a new song in their mouths, even praise unto\ntheir God.' Many have seen it and sung it; many now see and sing it;\nmany shall see and sing it, and trust in the Lord. They find in thee\nall that is expressive of life; all that is expressive of safety; all\nthat is expressive of comfort; all that is expressive of happiness.\n\n \"'O how many are thy wonderful works which thou hast done, and\nthy thoughts which are to us-ward; they cannot be reckoned up in order\nunto thee: if I would declare and speak of them, they are more than\ncan be numbered.' Thou, thy blessed self, art the sum and substance of\nevery good to man. All this I know; all this have I at different times\nexperienced; and yet my heart is heavy, my spirits depressed. There is\nno cause, Oh no. Thy very afflictive providences have met my wishes,\nand been so many answers to my prayers.\n\n \"Thou Husband of the widow, thou Father of the fatherless, O how\nfully, how manifestly hast thou fulfilled these relations to thy\nworthless servant. Thou, in my early widowhood, didst call me to leave\nmy fatherless children on thee, annexing the promise that thou wouldst\npreserve them alive.\n\n \"Thou didst put it into my heart to plead the promise in a\nspiritual sense; to ask, to hope, to wait for the new birth, the life\nwhich Christ died to purchase, and lives to bestow.\n\n \"In three of these fatherless I have seen thy work. Long did the\ngrain of mustard-seed lie buried among the weeds of worldly-mindedness;\nlong were my hopes and fears alternate; but now the blessed\ndiscipline of the covenant has been exercised; I have witnessed it, I\nhave felt it--suffered the rod with them and for them, but waited for\nthe fruits in hope; and glory to thee, dear Husband and Father, I\nhave not waited in vain. Thou hast written _vanity,_ and opened our\neyes to read vanity written on every earthly enjoyment, except so far\nas thou art enjoyed in them. Thou hast enabled not only thine aged\nservant, but her children, to put a blank into thy hand, and to say,\n'Choose thou for us.' We take hold of thy covenant, and choose it for\nour portion. Is not this, O Lord, the full amount of my desires? Thou\nwilt finish the work in thy own time, and by means of thy appointing.\nAmen. Lord, do as thou hast said.\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER V.\n\n DEATH OF HER DAUGHTER--FIRST MISSIONARY\n SOCIETY IN NEW YORK.\n\n In July, 1795, Mrs. Graham's second daughter, Joanna, was married\nto Mr. Divie Bethune, merchant in New York. In the following month her\neldest daughter, Mrs. Stevenson, was seized with a fatal illness.\nPossessing a most amiable disposition and genuine piety, she viewed\nthe approach of death with the composure of a Christian and the\nintrepidity of faith.\n\n She had been in delicate health for some years, and now a\ncomplication of disorders denied all hope of recovery. She sung a hymn\nof triumph until the struggles of death interrupted her. Mrs. Graham\ndisplayed great firmness of mind during the last trying scene, and\nwhen the spirit of her daughter fled, the mother raised her hands, and\nlooking towards heaven, exclaimed, 'I wish you joy, my darling.' She\nthen washed her face, took some refreshment, and retired to rest.\n\n Such was her joy of faith at the full salvation of her child; but\nwhen _the loss of her company_ was felt, the tenderness of a\nmother's heart afterwards gave vent to feelings of affectionate\nsorrow: nature will feel, even when faith triumphs. In her devout\nmeditations before God, Mrs. Graham improves this event as follows:\n\n\n \"OCTOBER 4, 1795.\n\n \"Why, O why is my spirit still depressed? Why these sobs? Father,\nforgive. 'Jesus wept.' I weep, but acquiesce. This day two months the\nLord delivered my Jessie, _his Jessie,_ from a body of sin and\ndeath, finished the good work he had begun, perfected what concerned\nher, trimmed her lamp, and carried her triumphing through 'the valley\nof the shadow of death.' She overcame through the blood of the Lamb.\n\n \"I rejoiced in the Lord's work, and was thankful that the one,\nthe only thing I had asked for her, was now completed. I saw her\ndelivered from much corruption within, from strong and peculiar\ntemptation without. I had seen her often staggering, sometimes falling\nunder the rod; I had heard her earnestly wish for deliverance from\nsin, and when death approached she was more than satisfied: said she\nhad been a great sinner, but she had a great Saviour; praised him and\nthanked him for all his dealings with her--for hedging her in, for\nchastising her; and even prayed that sin and corruption might be\ndestroyed, if the body should be dissolved to effect it. The Lord\nfulfilled her desire, and, I may add, mine. He lifted upon her the\nlight of his countenance; revived her languid graces; increased her\nfaith and hope; loosed her from earthly concerns, and made her rejoice\nin the stability of his covenant, and to sing, 'All is well, all is\nwell; good is the will of the Lord.' I did rejoice, I do rejoice; but\nO Lord, thou knowest my frame; she was my pleasant companion, my\naffectionate child; my soul feels a want. O fill it up with more of\nthy presence; give yet more communications of thyself.\n\n \"We are yet one in Christ our head--united in him; and though she\nshall not return unto me, I shall go to her, and then our communion\nwill be more full, more delightful, as it will be perfectly free from\nsin. Christ shall be our bond of union, and we shall be fully under\nthe influence of it.\n\n \"Let me then gird up the loins of my mind, and set forward to\nserve my day and generation, to finish my course. The Lord will\nperfect what concerns me; and when it shall please him, he will\nunclothe me, break down these prison-walls, and admit me into the\nhappy society of his redeemed and glorified members: then 'shall he\nwipe away all tears from my eyes,' and I shall taste the joys which\nare at his right hand, and be satisfied for evermore.\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham made it a rule to appropriate _a tenth_ part of\nher earnings to be expended for pious and charitable purposes. She had\ntaken a lease of two lots of ground on Greenwich-street from the\ncorporation of Trinity church, with a view of building a house on them\nfor her own accommodation; the building, however, she never commenced.\nBy a sale of the lease, which her son Mr. Bethune made for her in\n1795, she got an advance of one thousand pounds. So large a profit was\nnew to her. \"Quick, quick,\" said she, \"let me appropriate the tenth\nbefore my heart grows hard.\" What fidelity in duty; what distrust of\nherself. Fifty pounds of this money she sent to Mr. Mason in aid of\nthe funds he was collecting for the establishment of a Theological\nSeminary. Her own version of this matter we have in a letter to her\nfamiliar friend Mrs. Walker, of Edinburgh:\n\n\n \"1795.\n\n \"MY DEAR MRS. WALKER--My last informed you that we had been\nmade to taste of the Lord's visitation--the yellow-fever--but in\ngreat mercy had been spared in the midst of much apparent danger. I\nhave now in my house a girl who lost both father and mother, and\nmany whole families were cut off; my house was emptied; my school\nbroken up; we confined to town, and heavy duty laid upon us at the\nsame time. I trembled again for fear of debt; but 'the Lord brought\nmeat out of the eater.'\n\n \"Three years ago, when tried by having one house taken over my\nhead, another bought, and obliged to move three times in as many\nyears, some speculating genius brought me under the influence of the\nmadness of the times, and persuaded me I might build without money. It\nis quite common here to build by contract. I could not purchase\nground, but I leased two lots of church land, got a plan made out, and\nworried myself for six months, trying to hatch chickens without eggs.\nI had asked the Lord to build me a house, to give success to the\nmeans, still keeping in view covenant provision, 'what is good the\nLord will give.' After many disappointments I said, Well; I have\nasked--I am refused--it is not good--the Lord will not give it: he\nwill provide, but in his own way, not mine.\n\n \"Of course I had to pay ground-rent, which in three years\namounted to two hundred and twenty dollars. I think I hear you say, I\nnever could have believed that Mrs. Graham could be guilty of such\nfolly--nor I; but seeing and hearing of many such things, I fancied\nmyself very clever. Last year a basin was formed, and wharves around\nit, opposite to the said lots; the epidemic raging on the other side\nof the city brought all the vessels that came in round to them, and\ngreat expectations were formed for this new basin; houses and stores\nsprung up like mushrooms, and Mr. Bethune sold my lease for one\nthousand pounds. Lo, and behold, part of it is already spent. All my\nprovision through this wilderness has been so strongly marked by\npeculiar providences, my mind seems habituated to a sense of\ncertainty. I feel my portion of earthly good safer and better in my\nLord's hand than in my own.\"\n\n\n In the ensuing year we find the following outbreathings of her\nrich Christian experience:\n\n\n \"JANUARY 3, 1796.\n\n \"'Rejoice in the Lord alway, and again I say, rejoice. Let\nyour moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.'\nPhilippians 4:4-7.\n\n \"'Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and\nsupplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto\nGod. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep\nyour hearts and minds, through Christ Jesus.'\n\n \"Christ Jesus! what does not this name comprehend? He is mine,\nand all is mine. I do rejoice in the Lord, yea, more or less, I\nrejoice always. This heart of mine is sensible to every human\naffliction; my tears flow often and fast: I weep for myself, and still\nmore for others; but in these very moments of heart-wringing\nbitterness, there is a secret joy that Jesus is near; that he sees,\nknows, and pities. He is Jehovah as well as Jesus, and could have\nprevented the affliction under which I groan; but for my good, and the\ngood of those near and dear to me, he suffered it, or prepared it. The\ngood of his people is connected with his glory; they cannot be\nseparated: therefore, Father, glorify thy name; I rejoice, and will\nrejoice. The Lord can remove, and will remove the affliction the\nmoment it has answered the gracious purpose for which it was sent. I\nwould not wish it one moment sooner. While it lies heavy, he is my\nalmighty friend, my rest, my staff of support.\n\n \"'In the time of trouble, he shall hide me in his pavilion; in\nthe secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon\na rock.\" Psalm 27:5.\n\n \"'The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in\nhim, and I am helped, therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; with my\nsong I will praise him,' and in his strength and by his grace, let\nmy 'moderation be known unto all men.' My Lord is at hand--at hand\nto support, at hand to overrule, at hand to deliver. Therefore I\nrejoice always.\n\n \"Blessed be God for the heart-easing, heart-soothing privilege of\ncasting all my cares upon him, and for the blessed assurance that he\ncareth for me and mine: that he allows, invites, yea, commands me to\nbe careful for nothing, but in all things, by prayer and supplication,\nwith thanksgiving, to let my requests be made known unto him, who is\nman, and touched with the feeling of our infirmities--Jesus wept--and\nGod, the almighty God, to support, overrule, deliver. Therefore my\nheart rejoiceth always.\"\n\n\n \"MAY 16, 1796.\n\n \"'If his children forsake my law, and walk not in my judgments,\nif they break my statutes and keep not my commandments, then will I\nvisit their transgression with the rod, and their iniquity with\nstripes: nevertheless, my loving-kindness will I not utterly take from\nhim, nor suffer my faithfulness to fail; my covenant will I not break,\nnor alter the thing that is gone out of my lips.' Psalm 89: 30. Amen;\nblessed promise. Oh, it is a well-ordered covenant, and it is sure. Of\nall the provisions of the covenant, this has been to my soul among the\nmost comfortable. Thanks be to God for the discipline of the covenant;\noften has it been administered: thou knowest, and I know in part, how\nnecessarily, although I shall not know nor understand all, until that\nblessed rod shall have perfected its correction, and shall never more\nbe lifted up.\n\n \"Many ups and downs has thy servant experienced in this vale of\ntears; many tears have watered these now aged cheeks; in a variety of\nways hast thou stricken, and at times stripe has followed stripe, but\nmercy and love accompanied every one of them. I bless thee, Oh, I\npraise thee, that I have seldom received a stripe but I had with it a\ntoken of love. Sin was imbittered, a Saviour endeared, and grace given\nto kiss the rod, and cleave to him that had appointed it. And now I\ncan read in legible characters where, in many instances, thy check met\nmy wandering steps, stopt me short of huge precipices, and preserved\nme from destroying even my worldly comfort. In some instances--I thank\nthee they have not been many--thou hast been pleased to let me alone,\nto let me pursue my own way, ways so wise in my own eyes that I have\neither not sought counsel at all, or sought it as Balaam did, with my\nheart set on my own will.\n\n \"In some cases thou hast let me eat of the fruit of my own\ndoings, and let me weary myself in my own way, until I found it not\nonly vanity and vexation of spirit, but sometimes a labyrinth from\nwhich I could find no escape: then did I cry unto the Lord; then did I\nremember my backslidings; then did I seek unto the cleansing fountain\nand to the appointed Mediator, the maker up of the breach: then did I\nexperience afresh the Lord's power to save.\n\n \"In how many instances has he given a sudden turn to providences,\nwhich have been made means of my deliverance; not only so, but brought\ngood out of my evil, so that I have been made to wonder, and to say,'\nSurely this is the finger of God.'\n\n \"I destroy myself, but in thee is my help found. O let these\nwanderings end; fix it deep on my mind, that in the Lord only have I\nwisdom as well as strength: that 'it is not in man that walketh, to\ndirect his steps.' When shall I learn to live simply on Christ, by\nthe light of his pure unerring word, and the Spirit coinciding; and\nhave done with these carnal reasonings, the wisdom of men. 'Search\nme, O Lord, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts, and\nsee if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way\neverlasting.' Amen.\"\n\n\n \"MAY 28, 1796.\n\n \"This is the anniversary of my dear Jessie's birth, no more to\ncall us together here; but I yet remember it as a day in which our God\nWas merciful to me, and made me the mother of an heir of salvation. I\nbless, I praise my covenant God, who enabled me to dedicate her to him\nbefore she was born, and to ask only one thing for her as for myself,\neven an interest in his great salvation, leaving it to him to order\nthe means, time, and manner, as of her natural birth and ripening age,\nso of her spiritual birth and ripening for glory; he accepted the\ncharge, and he has finished the work, to his own glory, to her eternal\nhappiness, and my joy and comfort. I have witnessed remaining\ncorruption fighting hard against her, and bringing her again and again\ninto captivity to the law of sin and death warring against her. I have\nseen the rod of God lie heavy upon her, according to the tenor of the\ncovenant, when she forsook his laws and went astray: when she walked\nnot in his judgments, but wandered from his way, he visited her faults\nwith rods and her sins with chastisements, but his loving-kindness he\nnever took from her, though he often hid it, nor altered the word\nwhich he had spoken, that he would never leave her, never forsake her;\nthat in due time he would deliver her from all her enemies. I\nperceived her desires to be delivered from the world and the body, and\ntaken home to the bosom of her God, since that appeared at times the\nonly way she could be delivered from sin. I heard her lament her\nunfruitfulness, her unsteadiness: I heard her exclaim, 'Oh, what a\nsinner, what a great sinner;' and, 'Oh, what a Saviour; O the goodness\nof God in hedging me in, and saving me from myself; his covenant\nstands fast, it is established, it is sure.' I witnessed a God\npardoning sin, yet taking vengeance on inventions. I witnessed the\nsinner, after being sixteen years in the school of Christ, taught by\nhis ministers, and most effectually by his rod, taking shelter in 'the\ncity of refuge,' in the atonement of God's providing, and in 'a surety\nrighteousness,' and finishing her struggles with, 'All is well.' My\nheart echoed, and does echo, and will to all eternity, 'All is well.'\nGlory to God; sing, not unto her, not unto me, not unto any creature,\nbut 'to God be the glory,' that she is now delivered from 'a body of\nsin and death, and made meet to be a partaker with the saints in\nlight.' HALLELUJAH.\"\n\n\n \"JUNE, 1796.\n\n \"'I was glad when they said unto me, Let us go into the house of\nthe Lord.' Psalm 122.\n\n \"'The house of the Lord, whither the tribes go up, the tribes\nof the Lord, unto the testimony of Israel, to give thanks unto the\nname of the Lord,' to seek his face, to learn his will, to taste his\nlove, to behold his' glory, to enjoy God as their own God and\nreconciled Father.\n\n \"Lord, let my heart be warmed more towards thy house; I have\nsought and found thee in thy sanctuary, read thy providences, and been\ntaught thy will; I have tasted thy love and beheld thy glory; I have\nenjoyed thy presence as my own reconciled Father in Christ Jesus; I\nhave been satisfied with thy goodness, as with marrow and fatness; and\nyet how cold and languid at times, how little desire to return, how\nsmall my expectations, how wandering my imagination. How do I sit\nbefore thee as thy people, and my heart with the fool's eyes at the\nends of the earth. Lord, I should blush and be ashamed were a\nfellow-mortal to see my heart at times. I may hide my eyes from\nviewing vanity, but the evil lies within. O Lord, thou knowest the\ncause. After all I have heard, seen, tasted, and handled of the word\nof life, I am still of myself an empty vessel, unable to speak a good\nword, or think a good thought. Great are thy tender mercies, O Lord.\n'Quicken me according to thy word; turn thou away my eyes from\nbeholding vanity, and quicken me in thy way: then shall I run in the\nway of thy commandments when thou hast enlarged my heart.'\n\n \"The house of God; the owner, the builder, and maker is God,\nand it is his peculiar treasure. Christ is the foundation and chief\ncorner-stone, and his house are we, built upon him, cemented\ntogether, a spiritual building; the foundation cannot fail, the\ncorner-stone can never give way; neither can we fall to pieces, or\nbe separated from him.\n\n \"The house of God; 'Jerusalem, Zion, the rest of God, where he\ndelights to dwell,' where he will for ever stay; the house of God, the\nchurch, yea, the body of Christ: Christ the head, his people the\nchurch, his members whose life is in him, and derived from him; and\nbecause he lives we shall live also. Lord, enlarge my understanding to\ncomprehend more and more of the height and depth, length and breadth\nof the love of Christ, which passeth all understanding. Open my eyes\nto behold wondrous things in thy law and gospel. I am as yet but a\nbabe; glory to God that I am what I am, a babe in Christ. I shall be\nnourished with life and strength from my divine Head; educated and\nnurtured by the blessings of the new covenant. I shall arrive at the\nperfection of stature appointed, and stand in my lot at the latter\nday. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"AUGUST 4, 1796.\n\n \"A day to be remembered. Rose at four, not to mourn--no, but to\nrepeat my grateful thanks to my covenant God for the work he finished\nthis day last year, in delivering my weak, feeble, tossed, and tried\nJessie from a body of sin and death, and giving her 'the victory\nthrough Jesus Christ, who loved her and gave himself for her.' To thee\nshe was dedicated ere she saw the light; to thee a thousand times I\nrepeated the dedication, begging that thou mightest bring her within\nthe bond of thy covenant; this was the sum and substance of all my\naskings for her. I witnessed the time of her second birth, saw the\ntears of conviction and remorse. I witnessed thy loosing her bonds,\nand tuning her heart and tongue to praise redeeming love. I witnessed\nthe teaching of thy Spirit, and the enlightening of her eyes, and the\ntaste thou gavest her of thy salvation; I thought her mountain stood\nstrong, and she would not be easily moved; but who can tell the\ndeceitfulness of the human heart? Too soon did we all turn aside like\na deceitful bow, forsook the fountain of living waters, and hewed out\nbroken cisterns that could hold no water. Glory to God for the\ndiscipline of the covenant, that he did not cast us off, but chastened\nand corrected. He repeated the discipline stripe upon stripe: I stood\nby and saw it, and though my heart melted at times, I said, 'She is in\nher Father's hand, let him do his pleasure.'\n\n \"I too was unfaithful to her, thou knowest, and often entered\ninto the same vanity of mind, which stifled the love of God in our\nhearts, instead of guarding her and warning her; still, still the\nShepherd of Israel followed after both, and with the precious rod\nrestored both, time after time, till it pleased thee to finish her\nwarfare, and deliver her from both body and sin. Lord, I thank thee\nfor all the circumstances, for the privilege of attending her in her\nwarfare, for the cheerfulness of her spirits, for the rich support we\nall experienced, for the view we all had of thy faithfulness and\nfatherly dealing, and for her last words, 'All is well.' O yes, every\nthing thou doest is well, and this was peculiarly well. I resigned her\nto thee with joy and thankfulness, and I still acquiesce. Her thou\nhast taken, me thou hast left, to be yet exercised with further\ndiscipline. It is well; thy will be done. O help me to profit by every\npang. Let sin be mortified and my soul be purified; enlarge my heart\nto run the ways of thy commandments. Now may I lay aside every weight,\nand that vanity of mind which doth so easily beset me, and hath been\nthe secret spring of much backsliding both to myself and to my\nchildren. Lord, destroy it.. O let me now live to God, closely and\nconsistently; down with my will, with self in every form. O purify my\nmotives, and let my whole heart, soul, body, substance, and influence\nin the world be devoted to thee. Empty me of every thing that is my\nown, and let 'Christ live in me the hope of glory,' and let the glory\nof thy workmanship in my soul redound to thee, and thee alone. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"AUGUST 13, 1796.\n\n \"'As ye have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him,\nrooted and built up in him, and established in the faith, as ye have\nbeen taught, abounding therein with thanksgiving.' Colossians 2:6.\n\n \"O Lord, this is what I pant after. I would fain have done with\nwandering, Lord, thou knowest, for the work is thine. I have\nreceived the Lord Jesus as thy gift to a lost world, as thy gift to\nme an individual of that world, as having made peace by the blood of\nthe cross. I account it a faithful saying, worthy of all\nacceptation, that 'Christ came into the world to save sinners, of\nwhom I am chief,' I have received thee as the Lord my righteousness,\ncrediting thy own word, that 'Christ is the end of the law for\nrighteousness,' and that 'there is no condemnation to them that are\nin Christ Jesus.' I have received thee as 'the covenant given of the\npeople.' In all the relations by which thou art held out to me in\nthis Bible, so far as I know or understand, I have received thee. I\nhave no hope in myself, no trust in myself, nor any views of\ncommunication from God of any kind, but through the one 'mediator\nbetween God and man, the man Christ Jesus.'\n\n \"O my God, what is my life, what is my happiness but a continual\nreceiving? Thou art 'the bread of life' that must keep alive the\nliving principle in my soul. In thee 'dwelleth all the fulness of the\nGodhead bodily.' Thy people are complete in thee; thou art their head,\nthey are thy body, and by joints and bands have nourishment ministered\nto them, and are knit together, and increase with the increase of God.\n\n \"This, O this is what my soul pants after, closer and more\nintimate union and communion. I would be transformed into thine image;\nI would be thy temple; I would have thee live in me, walk in me, make\nme one with thee; I would be delivered from self-will, self-wisdom,\nself-seeking; I would be delivered from that philosophy and vain\ndeceit which spoils souls and leads them off from their head: then,\nand not till then, shall I cease to wander, shall 'run and not be\nweary, walk and not faint.' Then shall 'I run in the way of thy\ncommandments,' and no longer turn aside to crooked ways. Then shall I\neat and drink, work and recreate, all to thy glory. Lord, send thy\nSpirit into my heart, that he may continually take of the things of\nChrist and show them unto me; that I may grow and be no longer a babe,\nbut arrive at the fulness of stature in Christ Jesus, and more\nsteadily, and more purely, and more zealously, and O, more humbly live\nto God, and glorify him in the world. Amen.\"\n\n\n The following extracts of letters to her friend Mrs. Walker, show\nhow ardently the true missionary spirit burned in the heart of Mrs.\nGraham, and how efficiently it was exemplified, not only in her\npecuniary donations, but her active and self-denying efforts to\ndiffuse information and enlist others in so worthy a cause. The\nefforts alluded to in the first extract evidently gave rise to the\nevent recorded in the second, _the formation of the first Missionary\nSociety in New York._ It is delightful also to notice her\nattachment to Christians of other denominations, and the gratitude\nwith which she remembered kindness received by herself when Providence\nhad cast her lot on what was truly missionary ground.\n\n\n \"Do you remember how much I used to say about our dear Methodist\nSociety in Antigua? and the three holy, harmless, zealous Moravian\nbrethren? and how the preachers gave each other the right hand of\nfellowship, forgetting their differences, in that land of open\nhostilities, on the kingdom of their common Lord? Thither the Lord\nbrought me from a land of entire barrenness, where, as far as I know,\na gospel sermon was never preached. Here I was brought into great\naffliction, and to pass through the severest trial that I ever\nexperienced before or since.\n\n \"'The Lord brought me into this fold, a poor straggling lamb, who\nhad for five years herded among the goats; and little difference was\nthere between them and me, except that my soul longed after green\npastures and rejoiced to hear the shepherd's voice, and when I heard\nit I knew it, though from one who did not belong to my original fold;\nthese good people nourished me with tenderness, bore with patience my\ncarnality. When my dear husband was taken ill, they wrestled for him\nin prayer; Mr. Gilbert was every day with him; the Lord heard and gave\na joyful parting; yes, joyful, never did I experience such joy; then\nthey sympathized with and soothed the widowed heart, fed her with\npromises, and in a measure established her: thus they wrought with God\nin calling in one, and restoring another; never, never shall I forget\nthe labors of love of that dear little society.\n\n \"How many such stragglers as I may be wandering in both East and\nWest Indies, and may be restored by these precious missionaries. I owe\nthem, of my labors, more than others. I send you a bill for _fifty\npounds._ I have received eighteen copies of the Missionary\nMagazine, as far as No. 9. I have got subscribers for them all, who\nwill continue; pay these, and send me what more numbers have been\npublished by the return of the Edinburgh packet, also eighteen\ncomplete sets from the beginning. I hope to be successful in disposing\nof them also. I suppose the sermons go to the same fund; send me a\nhundred sermons, I will see to get them disposed of; send them single,\nnot bound, and of the best; perhaps they may pave the way for more to\nfollow; every little helps; drops make up the ocean. We cannot yet\nproduce anything; we are gathering intelligence, and endeavoring to\ncollect money; but I grudge that what we can spare should be idle in\nthe meantime; the cause is one; pay the magazines at once, and the\nsermons if you have enough of my money. I hope to remit again in\nSeptember. I have a great wish to have a finger in your pie in some\nway; if I must not subscribe past our own society, I may sell books\nfor yours.\n\n \"Ever, my dear friend, yours,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"1796-7.\n\n \"I thank my friend for her letter. I rejoice with you, and\nbless the widow's God. He has indeed been so to us, to the full\namount of the promise. I have now much to sing of, little to\ncomplain of; my dear girls and Mr. B---- go forward steadily, having\nlaid aside the weights of amusements and gayety, and seem determined\nto follow the Lord fully through good and through evil report. Bless\nthe Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits. We have a full\nschool, and a very comfortable set of girls. The Lord has delivered\nfrom all heavy burthens.\n\n \"Last week a considerable number of ministers and lay Christians\nmet for the third time, and established a society for sending\nmissionaries among the Indians, and also among the poor scattered\nsettlers on the frontiers. A sermon was preached in the evening in one\nof the Dutch churches, 'The liberal deviseth liberal things,' etc.,\nafter which an address was read by the Secretary--our dear Mr.\nMason--which, when printed, I will send you.\n\n \"The society is to keep up a correspondence with your and the\nother societies. If they can effect anything themselves, apart here in\nAmerica, well; if not, they will throw their subscriptions into the\ncommon funds and get help from you. This view is very pleasant to us.\nThere is great need of itinerant preachers in our back settlements;\nthey are scattered, and no churches of any kind; even in some thick\nsettled counties they will not pay a minister. These are 'the highways\nand hedges;' O that the Lord may compel them to come in.\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n We next find Mrs. Graham administering consolation and imparting\ninstruction to a lady residing near Boston, Mrs. C----. With this lady\nMrs. Graham formed an acquaintance in New York, shortly after her\narrival in America. She was then a gay young widow; but having a\nstrong and cultivated mind, was delighted with Mrs. Graham and family;\nand a friendship was formed between them, which ceased only with\ntheir lives.\n\n As a proof of her friendship, Mrs. C---- wished to introduce her\nyoung female friends into gay fashionable society. This Mrs. Graham\nopposed; and while she stated her reasons she endeavored to persuade\nher young friend to come out from the world and cast in her lot with\nthe people of God.\n\n \"A word spoken in due season, how good it is.\" This was verified\nin the case of Mrs. C----, who, like her friend, was destined to enter\nthe heavenly kingdom \"through much tribulation.\" She afterwards\nentered the marriage state, and became a second time a widow while her\nchildren were still young; and though not destitute, her income was\nconsiderably reduced; which circumstances may throw light on parts of\nMrs. Graham's letters. Unhappily there was no evangelical minister\nnear her place of residence, which, with the want of early religious\ntraining, may account for so much darkness as to her spiritual state.\nMrs. Graham often visited her, and it pleased God in due time to\nscatter the darkness. Mrs. C---- for many years fully enjoyed the\nconsolations of religion. She trained up her children according to the\nmaxims of her friend, and had the happiness of seeing them following\nin her steps. One, Mrs. J.W., she saw depart in peace; and her own\ndying-bed was soothed by the prayers and attentions of her son, an\nesteemed and highly useful clergyman in one of our populous cities. As\nMrs. C---- adopted the signature of _Pilgrim,_ the letters to her\ninserted in the former editions of this memoir, are noticed as\naddressed to P----.\n\n\n To Mrs. C----, a Lady near Boston.\n\n \"FEBRUARY 10, 1797.\n\n \"MY EVER DEAR FRIEND--The desire of waiting you a long letter has\noccasioned too much delay on my part. One thing I can assure you of,\nyou have been much on my mind, and the subject of all our prayers.\n\n \"Tears of joy ran down my cheeks when J---- told me the state\nof your mind, and I thank our good and gracious God for opening your\neyes to see the vanity of this world, the corruption of your own\nheart, your need of atoning blood, and of a better righteousness\nthan your own. Hail, my sister in Jesus; flesh and blood hath not\ntaught you this, but your Father who is in heaven: the work is his,\nevidently his; and being begun, he will carry it on, and finish it\ntoo. Commit your soul then into his hand; he 'came not to call the\nrighteous, but _sinners_ to repentance;' his errand to our world was\nto seek and to save the _lost_. Trusting in his mercy, through\nChrist, your soul is as safe as his word is true; for none perish\nthat trust in him.\n\n \"'Trust in the Lord with all thy heart, and lean not to thine own\nunderstanding;' be not discouraged because of deadness, darkness,\nwandering, want of love, want of spirituality, want of any kind. Who\ntold you of these evils and wants? the Sun of righteousness shining\ninto your soul has shown you many of the evils there, but the half you\nknow not yet. The more you learn of the holiness and purity of the\ndivine nature and the spirituality of his law, the more you will be\ndissatisfied with every thing yours. Even a holy apostle said, 'In me,\nthat is, in my flesh,' or natural mind, dwelleth no good thing. The\nflesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; so\nthat the things that I would, I do not; and the things that I would\nnot, those I do. Yet it is not I,' not my new nature, 'but sin that\ndwelleth in me; for to will is present with me, but how to perform\nthat which is good I find not.'\n\n \"If this was the case with the apostle, who sealed his testimony\nwith his life, is it strange that you and I should have hearts full of\nall abominable things? These realities are cause of deep humility\nbefore God, but none of despair or doubt. All are alike guilty and\nvile, the whole head is sick, and the whole heart unsound; therefore\nwe need a whole Christ to atone for our sin, to cover our naked souls\nwith his imputed righteousness, and to be surety for us; to sanctify\nus by his Spirit, and prepare us for the purchased inheritance. O try\nto rest in him: believe it, you are complete in him; give up, my dear\nfriend, poring over and diving into your own heart and frames, and try\nto trust in an almighty Saviour to save you from foes without and foes\nwithin. Read Romaine's Walk and Life of Faith: he himself attained to\na high degree of holiness by getting out of himself, and trusting,\nresting, believing from day to day, for grace, for every duty, as it\noccurred. The promise runs, 'As thy days so shall thy strength be.'\n\n \"I cannot at this distance, and knowing nothing of characters,\noffer you any advice with respect to outward means; but if you know\nany truly pious, spiritual minister, I should think it your duty to\nlay open your mind to him. You may find in books matter as good as any\nman living can speak; but it is the Lord's appointed way, and he often\nhonors his servants, his ministers, by making them messengers of peace\nand comfort to his children. 'Are any sick, let them call for the\nelders of the church, and let them pray over them.' See how the\nChristians of old associated with one another. I am now doubly\nyours, etc.,\n\n \"I.G.\"\n\n\n \"APRIL 14, 1797.\n\n \"Eternity seems very near. I have often thought so without any\nvisible cause. Well, it will come; a few more rolling years, months,\nweeks, or days will assuredly land me on Canaan's happy shore. Then\nshall I know and enjoy what ear hath not heard, eye seen, nor heart\nconceived, even the blessedness that is at God's right hand. I have\ndesired, though I know not that I have asked, to glorify God on my\ndeath-bed, and to leave my testimony at the threshold of eternity,\nthat not one word of all that my God has promised has failed. He has\nbeen--O what has he not been?--in all my trials, all my afflictions,\nall my temptations, all my wanderings, all my backslidings, he has\nbeen all that the well-ordered covenant has said. Let this Bible tell\nwhat God in Christ, by his Spirit and his providence, has been to me;\nand let the same Bible say what he will be to me 'when flesh and heart\nfails;' yea, when 'the place that now knows me shall know me no more.'\nPerhaps when the messenger does come I shall not know him, but depart\nin silence. Well, as the Lord wills; he knows best how to glorify\nhimself. Jesus shall trim my lamp and perfect his image on my soul,\nsensible or insensible. I shall enter into his presence, washed in his\nblood, clothed in his righteousness, and my sanctification perfected.\nI shall 'see him as he is,' and be like him.\n\n \"Mourn not, my children, but rejoice; gird up the loins of your\nmind,' and set forward on your heavenly journey through this\nwilderness. So far as I have followed Christ, so far follow my\nexample; still living on Christ, depending on him for all that is\npromised in the well-ordered covenant. O stumble not into the world\nexcept when duty calls; at best it is a deadly weight, a great\nhinderance to spiritual-mindedness, and in as far as it gets a footing\nin your heart, it will not only mar your progress, but your comfort.\nLord, feed my children constantly with 'thy flesh and thy blood,' that\nthey may never hunger nor thirst for this world, but grow in the\ndivine life, and in the joy and comfort of the Holy Ghost. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"OCTOBER 20, 1797.\n\n \"How condescending is our covenant God. All we have or enjoy is\nfrom his hand; he gave us our being; our lives, although forfeited a\nthousand times, have been preserved. 'Our bread has been given us, and\nour water sure;' and not only these necessaries, but many comforts and\ngood temporal things have fallen to our lot; 'thou hast furnished our\ntable,' hast provided medicines and cordials when sick. Lord, I thank\nthee for all these mercies, but above all, that we can call thee our\nreconciled Father; that we have them not as the world have them, who\nare far from thee, and have no portion among thy children, nor\ninterest in thy well-ordered covenant; but that we have them as thy\nredeemed, as part of covenant provision, and with a covenant blessing,\nand among the _all things_ that work together for our good. Lord,\nenable us to be rich in good works. How condescending, that thou\nacceptest a part of thine own as freewill-offerings, and hast annexed\npromised blessings to those who consider the poor; hast said, 'He who\ngiveth to the poor, lendeth to the Lord.'\n\n \"I thank thee that thou hast laid to hand a sufficiency to enable\nme and mine to eat our own bread; even that which, according to the\nregulations of society, men call our own. Thou only hast a right to\ncall it not so, for we are thine, and all that thou hast given us; but\nof thy free bounty and kind providence, 'thou hast enabled us to\nprovide things honest and of good report in the sight of all men,' and\nto give a portion to them who need.\n\n \"I trust thy Spirit has directed my judgment in the determination\nI have taken to set apart, from time to time, this portion, according\nas thou prosperest us in business, and preservest us in health and\nability to pursue it. I bless thee for indulgent, encouraging\nappearances, that since I began the practice thou hast added to my\nstock, and that which I have given has never straitened, but thou hast\nprospered me more and more. My poor's purse has never been empty when\ncalled for, neither has my family purse. Of thine own I give thee, and\nbless thy name for the privilege.\n\n \"Grant direction with respect to whom, and how much to give.\"\n\n\n The following meditations will afford refreshment to every\nChristian heart:\n\n\n \"1797.\n\n \"'As ye have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him,\nrooted and built up in him, and established in the faith, as ye have\nbeen taught, abounding there in with thanksgiving.'\n\n \"Yes, just so, and no other way shall any poor corrupted creature\nattain holiness, in the very same manner that he received the Lord\nJesus at first. He is' the Alpha; and Omega, the first and the last,\nthe beginning and the end.'\n\n \"O Lord, my Saviour, my complete Saviour, and in whom I am\ncomplete, I received thee as my expiatory sacrifice, by whom atonement\nwas made for my sins; by whom reconciliation was made; I reconciled to\nGod, and God to me. I was then delivered from the power of darkness\nand translated into the kingdom of God's dear Son, and have redemption\nthrough his blood, even the forgiveness of sins. This same blood must\ncleanse my daily spots, must cleanse my very best services; this same\nblood must cleanse my conscience daily, and give me confidence in God,\nas my reconciled Father. By this same peace-speaking blood I daily\npresent myself in his presence, and know that he sees no iniquity in\nme so as to condemn me.\n\n \"O Lord, I receive thee as my justifying righteousness,\ndisclaiming all confidence in my own works, throwing them aside as\nfilthy rags. I place my sole dependence upon an imputed righteousness,\n_that_ righteousness wrought out by thee as my surety, in thy\nholy, meritorious life and death; believing thy testimony, that 'the\nwages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life, through\nJesus Christ our Lord.' Just so must I go on, trusting in, resting\nupon, rejoicing in the Lord my righteousness. By one man's offence\nmany were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many, and I\namong others, be made righteous. 'Christ is the end of the law for\nrighteousness,' therefore I walk at liberty, free from all dread of\ncondemnation. Not as a slave, not as a servant, not as a hireling, not\nas a probationer; but as a child and heir of God, to whom the\ninheritance is made sure. I have received the seal of the testament,\nratified and made sure by the death of the testator. All the blessings\ncontained in this Bible, the records of the well-ordered covenant, are\nmine; and, Oh glorious truth, the testator died to ratify and insure\nthis testament; but he lives again, the glorious executor.\n\n \"O Lord, I received thee as my king: depending upon promised\nstrength, I swore allegiance to thee, and to thy government. Just so,\nmy dear sovereign Master, must I go on: rejoicing in its privileges,\nsubjecting myself cheerfully to its restrictions; studying with care\nits positive commands, and setting myself to obey; submitting with\nmeekness to its discipline; claiming thy kingly power to subdue the\ncorruptions of my heart, to defend from foes within and foes without;\nand when thou callest me to fight, to arm me for battle, and lead me\non to victory.\n\n \"I received thee as my divine Saviour, as the covenant of the\npeople: the covenant arranged, ratified, and fulfilled; to me a\ncovenant of free gift. Receiving thee, I received all the promises in\ntheir fullest extent, as legally made over and confirmed to me by the\nirrevocable gift of Deity: and in thee, as my Saviour, dwelleth all\nthe fulness of the Godhead bodily; yes, dwelleth in him for his\npeople, his ransomed; dwelleth in him as our head; we are united to\nhim, one with him, as he and the Father are one, and being one with\nhim, we are complete in him. He is the head, we the members; he is the\nvine, we the branches; he is the foundation and chief corner-stone, we\nthe building. Thus let us walk in him; rooted and built up in him;\nfilled with the knowledge of his will, in all wisdom and spiritual\nunderstanding; walking worthy of the Lord, unto all pleasing--being\nfruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God;\nstrengthened with all might, according to his glorious power; unto all\npatience and long-suffering, with joyfulness; for it is he who worketh\nin us both to will and to do of his good pleasure; and although of\nourselves we can do nothing, yet we can do all things through Christ\nstrengthening us; and he has promised, that 'as our days so shall our\nstrength be.'\n\n \"It is well, Lord, it is well. Thou art mine, and I am thine:\nthou art mine with all thy fulness, what can I want besides? Nothing,\nLord. Thou hast given me 'the heritage of those that fear thy name;' I\nam satisfied with my portion. Amen. Be my God and the God of my seed,\nand glorify thy name in us.\"\n\n\n \"OCTOBER, 1797.\n\n \"'Remove far from me vanity and lies,' Psa. 119. Every deviation\nfrom rectitude and truth is sin. Who that knows any thing of the\ncorruption of the human heart, and its strange tendency to stray, to\nerr, yea, even to pervert the plainest, simplest, and most obvious\ntruths, but must see the propriety of his joining the psalmist, and\ncrying out, Lord, remove far from me the way of lies.\n\n \"The way of lies as it respects our judgment and sentiments, as\nit respects our motives of action, and as it respects our conduct.\n\n \"As it respects our judgment: how does every species of error\nabound; even the serious and earnest seekers of truth differ in many\nthings, which, although they may not prevent their final salvation,\nmar their progress in knowledge, in holiness, and in comfort. Lord,\nremove far from us the way of lies. Lead us to the pure, unmixed,\nunerring word of truth, as it respects our sentiments, and as it\nrespects our conduct. O how many deceive themselves by resting on a\nspeculative knowledge of the truth, or what they esteem such, while\ntheir hearts remain unaffected, their tempers unsanctified, and their\nlives unfruitful. Passionate, stubborn, relentless, unmerciful,\nimplacable tempers indulged and unmortified, must be a way of lies.\n'Learn of me,' says the Saviour, 'for I am meek and lowly in heart,\nand ye shall find rest to your souls.' 'The meek will he guide in\njudgment,' the meek will he teach his way.\n\n \"'Remove far from me the way of lies, and teach me thy law\ngraciously.'\n\n \"'Teach me thy law graciously,' not the ceremonial and the moral\nlaw alone, but the whole of God's revealed will. The psalmist knew the\nlaw ceremonial and moral, but he wants more and more of the teaching\nof the Spirit of God. 'He,' the Spirit of truth, 'shall take of mine,\nand show it unto you.' The word of God is ever the same; it contains\nthe whole truth, and nothing but the truth; every thing necessary to\nsafety, to holiness, and happiness: but O, the difference between him\nwho reads with a mind enlightened by the Spirit of God, and him who\nreads with no other assistance than his own poor blinded, darkened\nreason. Teach me then thy law graciously. I will praise thee with\nuprightness of heart, when I shall have learned thy judgments. 'Open\nthou mine eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy law.' The\npsalmist thirsted after more and more extensive views of the word of\nGod, and still as his views were enlarged he desired more. 'The earth\nis full of thy mercy,' verse 64; this was one lesson, but still he\ncries, 'Teach me thy statutes. Thou hast dealt bountifully with me, O\nLord, according to thy word.' Still he cries, 'Teach me good judgment\nand knowledge. It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I\nmight learn thy statutes.'\"\n\n\n \"OCTOBER, 1797.\n\n \"I love to feel the kindlings of repentance, self-loathing under\na sense of ingratitude, heart-melting with the view of pardoning\ngrace. I love to feel the sprinkling of my Redeemer's blood on my\nconscience, drawing forth the tears of joy and gratitude in the view\nof a free pardon. I love to dwell on the seal of reconciliation, while\nmy heart, glowing with gratitude, sinks into the arms of my redeeming\nLord, in full confidence of his love and my safety for ever. I love to\nfeel longings after closer communion, after more conformity to his\nimage, more usefulness to my fellow-members of the body of Christ, and\nto all his creatures. I love to feel deeply interested in the success\nof the gospel, in the declarative glory of Jehovah, as manifested in\nhis works of creation and providence, but chiefly in the\nsuperexcellent work of redemption: for 'thou hast magnified thy word\nabove all thy name.'\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER VI.\n\n FORMATION OF THE WIDOWS' SOCIETY--\n CLOSE OF HER SCHOOL.\n\n In November, 1797, the \"Society for the Relief of Poor Widows\nwith small Children\" was instituted at New York; a society which has\nrisen into great respectability, and has been productive of very\nbeneficent effects. The Lord, in his merciful providence, prepared\nthis institution, to grant relief to the many bereaved families who\nwere left widows and orphans by the ravages of the yellow-fever in the\nyears 1798 and 1799.\n\n It took its rise from an apparently adventitious circumstance.\nMr. B----, in the year 1796, was one of the distributing managers of\nthe St. Andrew's Society. The distribution of this charity was of\ncourse limited to a certain description of applicants. Mrs. B----,\ninterested for widows not entitled to share in the bounty of the St.\nAndrew's Society, frequently collected small sums for their relief.\nShe consulted with a few friends on the propriety of establishing a\nfemale society for the relief of poor widows with small children,\nwithout limitation. Invitations in the form of circular letters were\nsent to the ladies of New York, and a very respectable number\nassembled at the house of Mrs. Graham. The proposed plan was approved,\nand a society organized. Mrs. Graham was elected first directress,\nwhich office she held for ten years.\n\n At the semiannual meeting in March, 1798, Mrs. Graham made a very\npleasing report of the proceedings of the Managers, and of the amount\nof relief afforded to the poor. The ladies of New York truly honored\nthemselves and religion by their zeal in this benevolent undertaking,\nin reference to which Mrs. Graham says, in a letter to her friend\nMrs. Walker:\n\n\n \"I mentioned in my last that we had planned a society for the\nrelief of poor widows with small children: the success has been beyond\nour most sanguine expectations. We have now a hundred and ninety\nsubscribers, at three dollars a year, and nearly a thousand dollars in\ndonations. We have spent three hundred dollars this winter, and nearly\nall upon worthy objects. The poor increase fast: emigrants from all\nquarters flock to us, and when they come they must not be allowed to\ndie for want. There are eight hundred in the almshouse, and our\nsociety has helped along many, with their own industry, that must\notherwise have been there. The French, poor things, are also starving\namong us; it would need a stout heart to lay up in these times.\"\n\n\n In the same letter she informs her of the first monthly\nmissionary prayer-meeting known to have been held in the city of\nNew York.\n\n\n \"The second Wednesday in February we commenced our first monthly\nmeeting for prayer for the Lord's blessing on ours, and all the\nmissionary societies. It was far from full; but we must be thankful\nfor the day of small things, and pray, and wait, and hope. The Dutch\nchurches, the Baptist and Presbyterian have united so far as to\nofficiate in each other's churches; they have collected about\nseventeen hundred dollars, and are looking out for two missionaries to\nsend among the Indians, or to the frontiers.\"\n\n\n A few months later we find the following letter to a young man on\nhis joining the church:\n\n\n \"SEPTEMBER, 1798.\n\n \"MY DEAR YOUNG FRIEND--You have now ratified in a public manner\nthat transaction which, no doubt, passed previously in private between\nyou and your God. You have declared your belief of the gospel, and\nhave taken hold of God's covenant of promise. You have fallen in with\nhis own plan, which he has appointed for the salvation of guilty\nsinners; and rested your soul upon his word of promise that you shall\nbe saved. You have, at the same time, dedicated and devoted your soul,\nyour body, your time, your talents, your substance, your influence,\nall that you are and have, to be disposed of at his pleasure, and for\nhis glory, in the world. You are no longer your own. You are bought\nwith a price, adopted into the family of God, numbered with and\nentitled to all the privileges of his children. Your motives of\naction, your views, your interests, are all different from those of\nthe worldling. Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, your aim\nmust be, and will be, to do all to his glory. This must go with you,\nand be your ruling principle in all the walks of life. By your\nintegrity, uprightness, diligence, and disinterested attention to the\ninterest of your employers, you will glorify God and have his presence\nwith you in business. By a due and marked observance of the Sabbath,\nand attendance on the ordinances, you will glorify him. By regularity,\norder, and temperance, crowned with an open acknowledgment of God\nbefore all who may surround your board, you will glorify him in an\nespecial manner in these days of degeneracy, and, crowned with family\nworship, you will glorify him, and his presence will be with you, and\ngreat will be your comfort. God's interest in the world must also be\nyours. The good of his church in general, and that of your own family\nin particular; and O, my son, if you would be rich in comfort, follow\nthe Lord fully, and follow him openly; and if you would do it so as to\nsuffer the least from the sneer of the world, do it at once.\n\n \"Already you have received congratulations on your joining the\nchurch, by those belonging to it; soon will it be known to those who\nwill scoff at it. But Christians and worldlings will look for\nconsistency; and if it be wanting, the last will be the first to mark\nit. A decided character will soon deliver you from all solicitations\nto what may be even unseemly, and dignified consistent conduct will\ncommand respect. Not but the Lord may let loose upon you the\npersecuting sneer and banter of the wise of this world, whose esteem\nyou wish to preserve; but, if he do, the trial will be particular, and\nhe will support you under it, and bring his glory and your good out\nof it.\n\n \"And now, my son, suffer the word of exhortation. You have\nentered the school of Christ, and have much to learn, far beyond what\nmen or books can of themselves teach, and you have much to receive on\ndivine credit, beyond what human reason can comprehend.\n\n \"I would recommend to you to read carefully, and pause as you\nread, and pray as you read for the teaching of the Spirit, the epistle\nof Paul to the Ephesians. Read it first without any commentary, and\nread it as addressed to you, S---- A----. You will there find what may\nin part stagger your reason; you will find what far surpasses your\ncomprehension; but yet read on, with conscious weakness, and\nignorance, and absolute dependence on divine teaching. When you have\nread it through, then take Brown's or Henry's exposition of it.\n\n \"A degree of mystery, my son, runs through the whole of God's\nrevealed word; but it is _his_, and to be received with\nreverence, and believed with confidence, because it is _his_. It\nis to be searched with diligence, and compared; and, by God's teaching\nand the assistance of his sent servants, the child of God becomes\nmighty in the Scriptures. Let not mystery stagger you: we are\nsurrounded with mysteries; we ourselves are mysteries inexplicable:\nnor let the doctrine of election stagger you; how small a part of\nGod's ways do we know, or can comprehend! rejoice that he has given\nyou the heritage of his people--leave the rest to him: 'Shall not the\nJudge of all the earth do right?'\n\n \"Jesus took once a little child and set him in the midst of the\npeople, and said, 'Except ye be converted, and become as little\nchildren, ye cannot enter the kingdom of heaven,' intimating with what\nsimplicity and docility men ought to receive the gospel; and the\nfollowing text also alludes to this: 'Suffer little children to come\nunto me, and forbid them not, for of such is the kingdom of heaven.'\nThere are many promises made to the diligent searchers after truth:\n'Then shall we know, if we follow on to know the Lord.' 'The secret of\nthe Lord is with them that fear him; and he will show them his\ncovenant.' Yet the highly enlightened Paul calls the gospel a mystery,\nand godliness a mystery; 'for now we see through a glass darkly; but\nthen face to face: now I know in part; but then,' in heaven, 'shall I\nknow even as also I am known.' Therefore, while you use all diligence,\naccompanied with prayer and the expositions of God's faithful\nministers, to understand every part of divine revelation, be neither\nsurprised nor disheartened at the want of comprehension, far less\nattempt to reduce it to human reason, as many have done to their ruin.\nThe Scripture says, 'Vain man would be wise, though born like the wild\nass's colt.' 'The wisdom of this world is foolishness with God.'\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n Again we have the following merited strictures by one taught from\nabove, on a passage in Pope's Essay on Man.\n\n\n \"1798.\n\n \"'Glows in the stars and blossoms in the trees.'\n\n \"There the poet must stop: thus far the natural mind, richly\nendowed with human powers, can go and trace a God of power, wisdom,\nand beneficence: O that thou hadst had eyes to see, and discern what\nflesh and blood could never reach; that all these glories dwindle into\ntapers, when compared with Jehovah manifested in the face of Jesus\nChrist. Every star, every tree, all vegetating, bursting, blooming\nlife, answer the end of their creation, manifesting his glory as thou\nsayest; but can they tell thee how this God can be just, and yet\njustify those who have rebelled against all his attributes; torturing\neven his fair and beautiful creation, and bringing it into subjection\nto their lusts, as thou hast well sung; murmuring at, and rebelling\nagainst his dispensations in providence; hardening themselves against\nhis government; perverting every good to their own misery, and\nimbibing wretchedness from means of blessedness? Can all that thou\nhast sung bring into congeniality perfection of wickedness and\nperfection of holiness, perfection of wretchedness and perfection of\nhappiness, perfect opposition in nature and principle? Here thy song\nstops short. Thou seest the evils and the misery; thou hast a glimpse\nof an opposite good, but all means proposed by thee ever have proved,\nand ever will prove inadequate to the attainment of it: the very\nattributes of a just and holy God oppose it: heaven and earth must\nstand amazed at the declaration that God would justify the ungodly.\"\n\n\n In the month of September, 1798, Mrs. Graham's daughter Isabella\nwas married to Mr. Andrew Smith, merchant, then of New York. Her\nfamily being thus settled to her satisfaction, and her health not\ngood, she was prevailed upon to retire from her school, and to live\nwith her children.\n\n During the prevalence of the yellow-fever in 1798, it was with\nmuch difficulty Mrs. Graham was dissuaded from going into the city to\nattend on the sick: the fear of involving her children in the same\ncalamity, in the event of her being attacked by the fever, was the\nchief reason of her acquiescing in their wish to prevent so hazardous\nan undertaking. During the subsequent winter she was indefatigable in\nher attentions to the poor, she exerted herself to procure work for\nher widows, and occupied much of her time in cutting it out and\npreparing it for them. The managers of the Widows' Society had each a\nseparate district; and Mrs. Graham, as first Directress, had a general\nsuperintendence of the whole. She was so happy in the execution of her\ntrust, as to acquire the respect and confidence of the ladies who\nacted with her, as well as the affections of the poor.\n\n Her whole time was now at her command, and she devoted it very\nfaithfully to promote the benevolent object of the institution over\nwhich she presided. The extent of her exertions, however, became\nknown, not from the information given by herself, but from the\nobservations of her fellow-laborers, and especially from the testimony\nof the poor themselves. When she had been absent for some weeks, on a\nvisit to her friends in Boston, in the summer of 1800, her daughter,\nMrs. B----, was surprised at the frequent inquiries made after her by\npersons with whom she was unacquainted: at length she asked some of\nthose inquirers what they knew about Mrs. Graham. They replied, \"We\nlive in the suburbs of the city, where she used to visit, relieve, and\ncomfort the poor. We had missed her so long, that we were afraid she\nhad been sick; when she walked in our streets, it was customary with\nus to come to the door and receive her blessing as she passed.\"\n\n\n We next find letters to her female friend near Boston, who was\nstill in much spiritual darkness and despondency.\n\n\n To Mrs. C----, near Boston.\n\n \"MARCH, 1799.\n\n \"MY EVER DEAR FRIEND--I have just read your letter, painful to\nyou to write, but to me as the mother's anguish which precedes her\njoy. The day will soon break, and the shadows flee away; and the dear\nSaviour whom you seek, will again comfort his returning prodigal.\n\n \"I will do what you desire me, and though I have the highest\nopinion of our young Timothy, J.M., I will pass by him in this case,\nand lay it before one of the aged Christians, Dr. R----rs or Dr.\nL----n; at the same time, my friend, I am as sure of their answer as\nif I were already in possession of it. Who told my friend that she was\nblind, and miserable, and wretched, and naked? Flesh and blood never\nyet taught proud man or woman this lesson.\n\n \"My dear friend, there is nothing new nor strange in all you have\ntold me: there is scarce a heaven-taught soul, who has made any\nadvances in the spiritual warfare, but could sympathize with you from\nexperience. What have you experienced more than the Scriptures tell\nus: that 'the heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately\nwicked?' Only the Lord can search it, only he can cleanse it. He takes\nthe prerogative to himself, and he calls it his covenant that he will\nmake with sinners in gospel times. You may strive and fight, and\nresolve and vow--all will not do: you lie at his mercy for holiness as\nwell as pardon. He is exalted as a Prince to give repentance, and he\nis the author and finisher of faith. He works all our works in us, and\nwithout him we are not equal to one good thought. We are his\nworkmanship, 'created anew in Christ Jesus,' My dear friend, put the\nwork into his hand, and try to wait on him in hope--hope in every\nsituation; do more, trust.\n\n \"You entirely mistake the situation of others; none of us have\nour heaven here: no, sin dwelleth in us; the very best have their ups\nand downs. Do you think your friend is always on the mount? very far\nfrom it. I am at times so cold, so dead, so stupid, that I can neither\npray, read, nor hear. I have begun the same chapter over and over,\nstill trying to fix my thoughts, and as often they wander on every\ntrifle; but my peace lies where you will soon learn to place yours, in\nthe merits of my almighty Saviour. My safety depends not on my frames,\nbut his promise and when tossed and tempted, dead and lifeless,\nemptied of every good, perhaps buffeted like you with abominable\nthoughts, the fiery darts of Satan, casting all on Him, I am safe as\nwhen basking in the sunshine of his love, and tasting what you have\ntasted: for you have tasted, and you shall yet taste the joys of his\nsalvation. I too have proved false to his covenant, have gone off with\nthe world, and been intoxicated with its vanities and empty delights,\nand have laid up for myself seasons of deep remorse; my sins have\noften separated between my God and me, especially in my younger days;\nthe Lord calls to watchfulness and diligence in the use of means, and\nhe generally honors these means, of his own appointing, with his\nblessing. When we either trust to these means, and fancy merit in\nthem, or neglect to use them as his appointment, he generally makes us\nfeel our error, but he does not cast us out of his family; he chastens\nus, and restores us.\n\n \"I write hastily, just to say that you have my sympathy and my\nlove; for well I know, the almighty Lord alone can loose your bonds,\nand give you 'joy and peace in believing.' All my advice may be summed\nup in this--trust in the Lord with all your heart; at least aim at\nthis; I say, aim at it, for this too must be given you. Roll yourself,\nyour doubts, your fears, your sins, your duties, all on him: say,\n'Lord, I believe, help thou my unbelief.' He is an almighty Saviour to\ndeliver sinners from sin as well as from punishment. I leave you on\nthe Father of mercies, and will, when the Lord enables, pray for you.\n\n \"Yours, etc.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"At last, my dear friend, the Lord appears; appears the Bible\nGod--'the Lord God, merciful and gracious, long-suffering, abundant in\ngoodness and truth, keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity,\ntransgression, and sin.'\n\n \"When was it that the Lord proclaimed this, and took unto\nhimself this name? After Israel, his chosen, had been guilty of that\nawful sin in the wilderness, of making the golden calf, and\nproclaiming, 'These be thy gods, O Israel:' David takes it up in the\n103d Psalm, 'The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and\nplenteous in mercy.' Read on, my dear, then turn to the 130th. This\nGod is your God, and has long been your God; his work was upon your\nheart, though you could not discern it. In bondage you have long\nbeen, but not a willing captive; unbelief kept you in bondage, long,\nlong after your eyes were opened to see your bondage; and even to\ndiscern, in some feeble measure, your remedy.\n\n \"The Lord has wise reasons for all you have suffered: if not now,\nyou shall in some after-time 'know and consider all the way by which\nhe has led you, to prove you, to try you, and show you what was in\nyour heart, that he might do you good in your latter end.' You did not\nwait patiently for the Lord your God; you did not in general say,\n'Though he slay me, I will trust in him:' no, my friend has been a\ngreat unbeliever, yet hath the Lord, the sovereign Lord, 'whose ways\nare not as our ways, nor his thoughts as our thoughts,' brought you\nout of 'a fearful pit, and out of the miry clay; set your feet upon a\nrock, and established your goings; put a new song into your mouth,\neven praise unto our God.' Now you sing the 34th Psalm. I do rejoice\nwith my friend; I bless the Lord with her; let us exalt his name\ntogether. It is establishing to my own soul. I have long prayed, and\nlong looked for this: I lived in the faith of it, assured that He who\nhad begun the good work, would perfect it in his own time.\n\n \"I cannot but regret your want of pastoral food; yet ought I to\nregret any thing? The Lord himself is your Shepherd. My Bible lies on\nmy lap, and I had turned to the 34th Psalm, to know if it contained\nwhat I would point out to you: on finishing the last verse, I\nunconsciously turned my eye on the Bible; the words that met it were,\n'I will instruct thee, and teach thee in the way that thou shalt go: I\nwill guide thee with mine eye.' Psa. 32:8. And so it shall be. Amen,\nmy God, Amen. Do as thou hast said.\n\n \"Perhaps, my friend, by this time your notes are lowered. It has\npleased the Lord to give you a strange sight: Mary Magdalene, a great\nsinner at the feet of Jesus, pardoned, comforted, and highly honored\nin after-life.\n\n \"This history, accompanied by the Spirit of God, has consoled,\nstrengthened, and raised up many bowed down since that day, many now\naround the throne, who sing of pardoning love.\n\n \"I now wish to say, hold fast the beginning of your confidence.\nYour experience is that of God's people. To rejoice in the Lord at all\ntimes is your privilege, but will not be always your attainment. The\nLord has done great things for you, whereof I am glad; but, my dear\nfriend, the warfare is not over: you must endure trials as others;\nengage with 'principalities and powers, and spiritual wickedness in\nhigh places,' and, worst of all, a treacherous heart within; which,\nfor all that it has seen and tasted, is yet corrupt and deceitful. The\nnew life which Christ gives to the soul, evidences itself in the\ndesires of the heart and affections. As certainly as the new-born babe\ndesires the breast, as certainly and as evidently does the new-born\nsoul desire union to God, communion with him, and conformity to him in\nheart, life, and conversation. This principle is in its own nature\nperfectly pure, but the old nature, the law in the spiritual members,\nis as perfectly corrupt: 'in my flesh dwelleth no good thing.'\n\n \"In the order of God's covenant it has not pleased him to deliver\neven believers, all at once, from sinful inclinations and passions; he\nhas provided for their final complete deliverance, and sin shall not\nhave dominion over them even here; but it is still in them while in\nthe body, and a dying body; and the remains of sin in the soul make\nthe believer's life a warfare, and this world a wilderness; soul and\nbody are diseased; both are redeemed, and provision made for the\nentire deliverance of both--for the soul at death, for the body at the\nresurrection; but while in the body, 'if any man say he has no sin, he\ndeceiveth himself, and the truth is not in him.' I John, I:8. Look at\nPaul's experience--what does he say of the believer's state? He calls\nit a warfare, a fight, a captivity for a time: see 1 Tim. 6:12;\n1 Cor. 9:26.\n\n \"I write not thus to dishearten you, but as a friend I warn you,\nlest you fall again into unbelief. Look not within for comfort, for\nconsolation, for confidence. Christ is the end of the law for\nrighteousness, his blood the atonement, and you are complete in him,\nhis grace is sufficient for you, his strength shall be perfected in\nyour weakness, and you shall go on. Grieve for sin you will, grieve\nyou ought; but keep ever in your remembrance 1 John, 2:1, and 5:11.\n\n \"Yours, etc.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"JANUARY 14, 1800.\n\n \"My dear friend says, 'O that I could have the society of some\naged pious clergyman or Christian, who had gone through his warfare.'\nO that you could, in the Lord's hand. I hope it might do you good:\nyet, after all, the Lord himself must loose your bonds; aye, and he\nwill, and also appoint the means.\n\n \"There are two kinds of rest awaiting you, the one in this life,\nthe other will not be attained till the mortal shall put on\nimmortality. When was it that Paul, the great apostle, could say he\nhad fought the good fight? Not till he could also say he had finished\nhis course, and was ready to be offered up; till then, he like others\nhad to continue the warfare between grace and corruption; like others,\nfound a law in his members warring against the law of his mind, so\nthat the thing that he would, he did not, and that which he would not,\nthat he did. Notwithstanding this, there is a blessed rest attainable\nhere, rest from the fear of wrath and hell--a rest in Christ as our\natonement, our surety, our complete righteousness, our title to\neternal life, and all the grace necessary to fit us for it. This is\nthe work of faith, or rather, this is faith itself. The soul\nestablished in this can rest in all possible circumstances; it depends\nnot on its frames: in darkness, when it is tossed, tempted, wandering,\nconscious of unhallowed tempers, perhaps of the actual commission of\nsin, though at such times the warfare between grace and corruption is\nso strong as to make the Christian exclaim, 'O wretched man that I am!\nwho shall deliver me from this body of sin and death?' he can still\nsay, 'The Lord lives, blessed be my Rock;' see the 42d and 43d Psalms.\nThe Christian can still say, my Lord and my God; he is sure the\nconflict will end, and that his God will bring good out of it; he\nenjoys hope; he feels his state as safe as in the most enlarged frame\nof mind, when he can pray, praise, love, rejoice. This is a riddle\nwhich only Christians can understand, and even they require many\nlessons to comprehend it, many more to practise.\n\n \"Have you Newton's letters? See his second letter in Cardiphonia.\nO try to fix your anchor of hope on that sure foundation which God has\nlaid in Zion, Christ himself. Trust him to save you from every evil\nwithout you and within you. When your own weakness sinks you, try to\nbe strong in his strength; when guilt disturbs, wash in the open\nFountain. But hold fast the beginning of your confidence unto the end.\n\n \"Be comforted, fight on, aim at trusting, and you shall, in the\nLord's time, also, cease from your own works, and rest, with more\nadvanced Christians, on the faithfulness of your own God in Christ.\nSee Hebrews 4:9, also chap. 12 throughout. I finish with chap.\n13:20, 21, my earnest prayer and sure hope for you, my precious\nfriend.\n\n Yours, etc.\"\n\n\n Writing to her brother Dr. Marshall, she alludes to the prevalent\nneglect of the voice of God in his judgments, and notices the death\nof Washington.\n\n\n \"NEW YORK, March 3, 1800.\n\n \"Here comes a letter of woe from my dear brother, on a subject\nalmost already forgotten in New York, the yellow-fever. Strange as\nit may seem, the disease, and all that it carried off, seem entirely\nout of mind. No mention made of the past, no apprehensions for the\nfuture. Country retreats are multiplying around, and people appear\nas if they had made a covenant with death. Potter's Field is filled\nwith our principal citizens; the prison and prison limits with\nmany of the survivors. The rest are _feasting_, _dancing,_ and\n_revelling_, or weeping over feigned woe in the theatre--a few\nexcepted, who have fled for refuge to the hope set before them,\nwhose eyes have been opened to discern the danger and accept the\noffered Saviour: among which number, I dare, through grace, reckon\nyour sister and her children. 'Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget\nnot all his benefits.'\n\n \"The city, indeed the United States, have been swallowed up in\nthe loss of Washington. The utmost stretch of human eloquence has been\ncalled forth in panegyric. His eulogium has been sounded in every\npossible mode--not excepting our pulpits. The 22d of February, his\nbirthday, was set apart to his memory. Two of our ministers were\nappointed to pronounce an eulogium on his character: one of whom was\nDr. Mason, the other Dr. Linn. The last I admired; it had its due\ninfluence over me; but of my own minister I could form no judgment:\nthe church, the pulpit, the man, the words, seemed so connected with\nthe 'Lord Jesus Christ,' his favorite theme, I could not realize the\n_mere_ orator.\n\n \"Great things were said of Washington, and they were due.\n\n \"The Lord himself called him by name, girded him, subdued great\narmies before him, with handfuls, like Gideon. He gave him wisdom in\ncounsel, and prudence in executing justice. A nation blessed him\nwhile he lived, and with all the power of language lamented his\ndeath. Ah, human depravity, how striking. Bursting with gratitude to\na creature--with enmity to a Saviour God; to God, who 'so loved the\nworld, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth\non him should not perish, but have everlasting life; and to as many\nas receive him gives power to become the sons of God,' by putting\nhis Spirit within them, and causing them to love and walk in his\nstatutes. But alas, the carnal unrenewed mind is enmity against God\nand his Christ. O that men were wise, and could see their disease,\nand the remedy.\n\n \"What misery is in the world at this day. It is only equalled by\nthe wickedness. How does potsherd dash against potsherd, mutually\ndestroying each other. How consoling to the Christian 'that the Lord\nreigns. The Lord sits King among the nations,' even our own Jesus,\n'Head over all principalities and powers, and dominions, and every\nname that is named in heaven and in earth;' all these shakings,\nturnings, and overturnings, shall prove subservient to the real\nprosperity of his church.\"\n\n\n \"1800.\n\n \"I have entered into my closet; I have shut my door; I would pray\nto my Father who is in secret; I would be shut up with my indwelling\nGod; but see the crowds that follow; see my treacherous heart that\ngives them admission; see my unsanctified imagination going off with\nthem, leaving nothing before thee but a lifeless lump of clay. Help,\nLord. Hast thou not redeemed me from vain imaginations? Lord, fill all\nthy temple; cast out the buyers and sellers; thyself prepare room for\nclose, undisturbed, holy conference. Grant that, according to the\nriches of thy glory, I may be strengthened with might by thy Spirit in\nthe inner man: dwell in my heart by faith, that 'rooted and grounded\nin love, I may be able to comprehend with all saints, what is the\nbreadth, and length, and height, and depth, and to know the love of\nChrist, which passeth knowledge, and be filled with all the fulness of\nGod.' Give unto thy redeemed servant the Spirit of wisdom and\nrevelation. Reveal thyself more and more in my soul; enlighten the\neyes of my understanding. Lord, improve, enlarge the powers of the new\nman. Spirit of the Father and of the Son, do thine office; take of the\nthings of Christ and show them unto me; that I may know what is the\nhope of his calling, and what the 'riches of the glory of his\ninheritance in the saints, and what is the exceeding greatness of his\npower to us-ward who believe, according to the working of his mighty\npower, which he wrought in Christ when he raised him from the dead,\nand set him at the Father's right hand, in the heavenly places, far\nabove all principalities, and powers, and might, and dominion, and\nevery name that is named, not only in this world, but also in that\nwhich is to come; and hath put all things under his feet, and given\nhim to be the head over all things to the church, which is his body,\nthe fulness of him that filleth all in all.' Filled with all the\nfulness of God; 'the fulness of him who filleth all in all!' O what\nthings are these. My soul stretches to comprehend; but, weak and\nfeeble, cannot climb those glorious heights, nor dig into these, to\nme, unsearchable depths. I can only spell after the language of the\nHoly Ghost, lisp out his own words. I dare not trust my powers of\ncomprehension to vary even the mode of expression.\n\n \"Well, it may be best for me; the valley of humility may be\nsafest for me. 'Father, glorify thy name.' Thou hast quickened me; I\nam not what I was. Thou hast wrought in me a measure of faith and\nlove; thou hast sealed me with the Holy Spirit of promise; thou hast\ngiven me the earnest of my inheritance; the full possession shall come\nin thy appointed time. Wherefore I will sing unto Him that is able,\nand will do exceeding abundantly above all I can ask, think, or\ncomprehend, according to that same mighty power that worketh in us.\nUnto him be glory in the church, by Christ Jesus, throughout all ages,\nworld without end. Amen.\n\n \"My covenant God, and the God of my house. Thy Spirit saith, 'If\nany man lack wisdom, let him ask of God.' Thou knowest the difficulty\nand danger of the present case. We are ignorant of hidden motions and\nprinciples, of Satan's suggestions, of corresponding or discordant\ncircumstances, of future providences and events. Lord, give counsel.\n\n \"If information and advice be duty on the part of thy servant,\ndetermine on the side of duty, be the danger what it may; and Oh,\nsearch, try, and deliver from every selfish or hidden impure motive.\nGive prudence in the choice of words, in the time and manner as well\nas purity in the matter. Save from injuring any of the individuals\nconcerned. And Oh, prepare the heart of thy other servant to receive\nthis office of friendship with a proper degree of confidence. Save\nfrom unjust suspicions, that it may be taken as meant in love, in\nChristian love and friendship.\n\n \"O thou who knowest all hearts, all motives, all circumstances\npast, present, and future, overrule for the manifestation of truth,\nfor the safety and good of thy servant, and for the closer union of\nall concerned in the bands of Christian love, confidence, and\naffection; and as our covenant God, in whom we trust for guidance in\nevery path of duty, glorify thy name.\n\n \"I record this prayer in faith, and wait an answer of peace from\nthy inward teaching and manifestation in the course of thy providence.\nAmen.\"\n\n\n \"1800.\n\n \"'His name shall endure for ever: his name shall be continued as\nlong as the sun: and men shall be blessed in him; all nations shall\ncall him blessed. Blessed be the Lord God, the God of Israel, who\nalone doeth wondrous things. And blessed be his glorious name for\never: and let the whole earth be filled with his glory. Amen, and\nAmen.' Psalm 72:17.\n\n \"Again have I and my children been fed with Christ's flesh and\nhis blood at his own table. Glorious things are said of thee, thou\ncity of our God; and rich the provision of the house of our God;\nwonderful the scheme that hath made sinful, guilty, rebel sinners the\ncitizens of this holy city, inhabitants of this holy house. Mysterious\ntruth. The city itself the house of God; the temple of the Lord, in\nwhich he delighteth to dwell. Closer yet, more mysterious, yet equally\ntrue, 'his body, his flesh, and his bones;' closer still, one Spirit\nwith him. As Mediator Emmanuel, he is the bond of union, whereby the\nguilty sons and daughters of Adam are made one with the Father, the\nSon, and the Holy Ghost.\n\n \"Wonderfully and fearfully are we made as creatures: as a\nrational creature, who can understand and comprehend himself; how\nthese members were fashioned; how this spark of vital flame was\nbreathed into the lifeless lump or atom? Wonder-working Lord, thou\nonly knowest. Wonderful are all the works of creation; but Oh, what\nare they to thy work of redemption? To bring worlds out of nothing, to\nbring light out of darkness, was thy easy work; but to bring good out\nof evil, this, this was the wonder. Thousands and ten thousands of\nworlds were, and may yet be created without cost. God says, Let it\n_be_, and it is; but redemption! O, who can tell the cost?\nBlessed Jesus, God manifested in the flesh; Christ, babe of\nBethlehem--man of sorrows--victim on the cross; thou only canst tell.\n'Blessed be the Lord God of Israel, who alone doeth wondrous things,\nand blessed be his glorious name for ever!' Whatever the cost, _it\nis finished_. He bowed his head and said, 'It is finished!' This\nfinished work is the new testament which he bequeathed to his\ndisciples 'the same night in which he was betrayed,' when he took\nbread, blessed it, brake it, gave it to his disciples, and said, Take,\neat, this is my body broken for you; and took the cup, and gave\nthanks, and gave it to them, saying, Drink ye all of it; for this is\nthe new testament in my blood, which is shed for many, for the\nremission of sins.\n\n\n \"The new testament! O, who can tell the blessings and benefits\ncontained in this testament, this dying legacy of our dear Emmanuel,\npurchased and sealed with his blood! What is the amount of it? What\nthe sum of blessings contained in it? Behold, God is become our\nsalvation. This is the amount. God himself, God in Christ reconciling\nus unto himself: by his mighty power subduing the enmity that is in\nus; melting our flinty hearts; drawing us with the cords of love;\ncreating us anew after his own image, which we had totally lost;\nuniting us to himself, even _us_, who were enmity itself, but now\nare become one with God, who is love. This is the work we have this\nday been celebrating: a given, a born, a living, a suffering, dying,\nrisen, ascended, glorified, reigning Saviour. The Lord of hosts, the\nKing of kings, the Almighty God dwelling with men, dwelling in men,\nand feeding them with his own body and blood. 'Behold, God is become\nour salvation; we will trust and not be afraid, for the Lord Jehovah\nis our strength and our song; he also is become our salvation,\ntherefore with joy will we draw water out of the wells of salvation.'\nHis attributes are the never-failing source; his ordinances the wells\nof salvation. God himself is ours, all that he is is ours, to bless\nand to make us happy. Ten thousand springs issue from this blessed\nsource, specified and particularized in his Bible, experienced and\ncelebrated by his saints. Let us drink and be refreshed, rejoice and\npraise: for Oh, who can tell the amount of our riches, in having God\nfor our portion? All things are ours, we are Christ's, and Christ\nis God's.\"\n\n\n The Widows' Society met monthly, when the money in the treasury\nwas divided among the managers, for the relief of the widows under\ntheir care. Mrs. Graham, as directress, thus acknowledges God and asks\nhis counsel:\n\n\n \"1800.\n\n \"O my God, I account it an honorable office thou hast given me. I\nhave received it from thee. Enable me to execute it to thee.\n\n \"Father of the fatherless, husband of the widow, make me a fit\ninstrument in thy hand of distributing thy bounty. Give discernment\nand judgment, tenderness, gentleness, humility, and love; let love to\nthee be the principle of my every action; lead me in the straight path\nof duty; on the matter, the manner, the time, let 'holiness to the\nLord' be written. I thank thee for this sum towards the relief of thy\ncreatures; be with us this evening, and direct our determination as to\nthe division of it. Amen.\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER VII.\n\n BENEVOLENT LABORS--MRS. HOFFMAN--\n CORRESPONDENCE.\n\n\n The \"Society for the relief of Poor Widows with small Children,\"\nhaving received a charter of incorporation, and some pecuniary aid\nfrom the Legislature of the state, the ladies who constituted the\nboard of direction were engaged in plans for extending their\nusefulness: Mrs. Graham took an active part in executing these plans.\nThe Society purchased a small house, where they received work of\nvarious kinds for the employment of their widows. They opened a school\nfor the instruction of their orphans, and many of Mrs. Graham's former\npupils volunteered their services, taking upon themselves, by\nrotation, the part of instructors. Besides establishing this school,\nMrs. Graham selected some of the widows best qualified for the task,\nand engaged them, for a small compensation, to open day schools for\nthe instruction of the children of widows in distant parts of the\ncity: she also established two Sabbath-schools, one of which she\nsuperintended herself, and the other she placed under the care of her\ndaughter. Wherever she met with Christians sick and in poverty, she\nvisited and comforted them; and in some instances, opened small\nsubscription lists to provide for their support.\n\n She attended occasionally for some years at the almshouse, for\nthe instruction of the children there in religious knowledge: in this\nwork she was much assisted by an humble and pious female friend, who\nwas seldom absent from it on the Lord's day. In short, her whole time\nwas occupied in searching out the distresses of the poor, and devising\nmeasures to comfort and establish them to the extent of her influence\nand means. At the same time, far from arrogating any merit to herself,\nshe seemed always to feel how much she was deficient in following\nfully the precepts and the footsteps of her beloved Lord and Saviour,\nwho \"went about doing good.\"\n\n It was often her custom to leave home after breakfast, taking\nwith her a few rolls of bread, and return in the evening about eight\no'clock. Her only dinner on such days was her bread, and perhaps some\nsoup at the soup-house, established by the Humane Society for the\npoor, over which one of her widows had been, at her recommendation,\nappointed. She and her venerable companion, Mrs. Sarah Hoffman,\nsecond directress of the Widows' Society, travelled many a day and\nmany a step together in the walks of charity. Mrs. Graham was a\nPresbyterian, Mrs. Hoffman an Episcopalian. Those barriers, of which\nsuch an unhappy use has been made by sectarians to separate the\nchildren of God, fell down between these two friends at the cry of\naffliction, and were consumed on the altar of Christian love. Arm in\narm, and heart to heart, they visited the abodes of distress,\ndispensing temporal aid from the purse of charity, and spiritual\ncomfort from the word of life.\n\n At each annual meeting, Mrs. Graham usually gave an address to\nthe Society, with a report of the proceedings of the managers through\nthe preceding year.\n\n In April, 1800, she stated that \"again the pestilence had emptied\nthe city; again every source of industry was dried up; even the\nstreams of benevolence from the country failed. Those storehouses,\nfrom which relief was issued to thousands in former calamities, now\ndisappointed their hopes; and those spared by the pestilence were\nready to perish by the famine. Such widows as had no friends in the\ncountry, under whose roof they might for a time seek shelter, were\nshut up to the only relief within their power, even to that society\nwhich had formerly saved them in many a strait. They came, were\nreceived with tenderness, assisted with, food, advice, and medicine.\n\n \"Four of the society's board, at the risk of their lives,\nremained in the city, steady in the exercise of their office. One\nhundred and forty-two widows, with four hundred and six children,\nunder twelve years of age, by far the greater part under six, have,\nfrom time to time, during the winter, been visited and relieved. Widow\nis a word of sorrow in the best of circumstances; but a widow left\npoor, destitute, friendless, surrounded with a number of small\nchildren, shivering with cold, pale with want, looking in her face\nwith eyes pleading for bread which she has not to give, nor any\nprobable prospect of procuring--her situation is neither to be\ndescribed nor conceived. Many such scenes were witnessed during the\nlast winter; and though none could restore the father and the husband,\nthe hearts of the mourners were soothed by the managers, while they\ndispensed the relief provided for them by their Father and their\nHusband, God.\"\n\n\n In the summer of 1800, Mrs. Graham again visited her friends in\nBoston, whence she wrote her daughter Mrs. B---- as follows:\n\n\n \"BOSTON, August, 1800.\n\n \"I yesterday received my dear J----'s letter, which gives fresh\ncause for thankfulness. The more my absence is lengthened, the less I\nam able to support the want of intelligence. Let us all bless God\ntogether for all his mercies: among those which are temporal, health\nis the chief; and I believe to most mothers it is more valued in their\nchildren than in their own persons. I rejoice with you over our\nrestored J----y. O that our covenant God may give the more important\nblessing of divine life. You had need to be importunate for this,\nafter the importunity exercised for natural life. I thank God also for\nthe alleviation of your own distress, for our dear D----'s restoration\nfrom complaints less alarming so far as they existed, but which might\nhave been the seeds of serious affliction.\n\n \"I could go on enumerating, for causes of thankfulness crowd into\nmy mind; but all are swallowed up in the grand mercy, the\ndistinguishing mercy of redeeming love to our souls. Salvation, not\nonly to me, but to my house. Oh, all words fail here. Read over with\nme, sing with me, in your heart, the 103d Psalm. O my God, dare I even\nsigh in thy presence, under any temporal pain, or hurt of body or\nmind, with such a Father, such a Christ, such a Comforter, such a\nrichly-furnished well-ordered covenant, such a constitution of grace\nand providence--O, such an all in all, even 'all the fulness of God.'\nMy God and the God of my seed, the God of my house; yea, and the God\nof my prodigal, who shall in heaven, if never on earth, join the song,\n'To him that loved us and washed us from our sins in his own blood, be\nglory, honor, dominion, power, and praise, for ever and ever. Amen.' O\nshall a murmur ever pass these lips, shall this unthankful heart\nindulge even a sigh over any object but sin; shall I shrink from any\ncross with such a crown? Father, glorify thy name.\n\n \"I have been to church; the subject, 'be not weary in\nwell-doing.' Many arguments were adduced for exertion; but the gospel\nwas wanting. O that my friends could hear our shepherd; he would sound\nhis Master's voice more in unison with their own hearts' experience,\nand views of new covenant provision and gospel motives: except in the\nBaptist congregations, the gospel is much mutilated here, and kept out\nof sight even by the few who are supposed to build upon it.\n\n \"Sabbath next brings round your--I will add, my gospel feast. I\nwill endeavor to meet you to-morrow evening, and to have you all on my\nheart, then and on the Sabbath, in that one Lord, one faith, one\nSpirit, one God and Father of all, who is above all, through all, and\nin all redeemed to himself by Jesus Christ, and sanctified by that one\nSpirit uniting all. What subjects! I cannot attain to the\ncomprehension, but I experience the truth and enjoy the comfort\nof them.\"\n\n\n The two following letters, addressed to a young lady whose\nacquaintance Mrs. Graham made while at Boston, show how tenderly she\nsympathized with the feelings of the young, and how earnestly she\nsought their good.\n\n\n To Miss M----, Boston.\n\n \"There was, my dear Miss M----, something in your countenance and\nmanner, at our last interview, which has dwelt on my mind ever since.\nYour former attentions, which I also marked, I attributed to the\nnatural benevolence of your heart; but your following a stranger, an\nold woman, of whom you know so little, and whom you were likely never\nto see again, to solicit her friendship and an interest in her\nprayers, spoke a language beyond nature. Either my sweet friend has\nalready chosen God in Christ to be her portion, and his love in her\nheart powerfully draws her to every one in whom she thinks she\ndiscerns his image, or she conceives that this world cannot give her\nhappiness even in this life; and impressed with the importance of that\nwhich is to come, she wishes to cast in her lot among God's people,\nthat she may know the good of his chosen and rejoice in their joy, and\nbecome a partaker of that peace which the Saviour bequeathed to his\ndisciples when about to leave them: 'Peace I leave with you. My peace\nI give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you; let not\nyour heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.'\n\n \"Let me congratulate my friend, which ever of these be the case.\nIf the first, you have, or will soon have, a peace which the world can\nneither give nor take away; if the last, the Saviour stands at the\ndoor of your heart and knocks, soliciting that heart which has too\nlong been hunting shadows and vanity. If your soul is dissatisfied\nwith the things of the world, and tired with disappointment, cast a\nlonging eye to the fountain of happiness. This is the claim of that\nGod whose name is love: 'My son, give me thy heart.' 'Come unto me,\nall ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.' 'In\nthe world ye shall have tribulation, but in me ye shall have peace.'\nBe assured, my dear friend, if you could obtain all of this world that\nyour heart could wish for, you would find vanity written on the\npossession. Nothing short of God himself can give happiness to the\nsoul; and exactly in proportion as man becomes weaned from the world,\nand his affections centre in God, is he in possession of happiness.\n\n \"But how is this to be attained? By God's own plan, and no other.\nAs many weary themselves in vain, hunting the shadows of time; so,\nmany great philosophers, sensible of this great truth, that God alone\ncan satisfy the rational soul, also weary themselves in vain, because\nthey will not seek the blessing in God's own way. 'When the world by\nwisdom knew not God, it pleased him by the foolishness of\npreaching'--what was esteemed so--'to save them that believe.' 'I\nthank thee, O Father, that thou hast hid these things from the wise\nand prudent, and hast revealed them unto babes.'\n\n \"The Saviour said, 'Ye will not come to me, that ye might have\nlife. No man can come to the Father but by me. I am the way, the\ntruth, and the life.' 'Search the Scriptures, for in them ye think ye\nhave eternal life, and they are they which testify of me.' The\nScripture testifies what our own hearts must assent to, that human\nnature is depraved and corrupt; broken off from God; at a distance\nfrom him by sin; enmity against him in his true character; opposed to\nhis holy law, in its extent and spirituality: we are also helpless,\ndead in trespasses and sins. 'O Israel, thou hast destroyed\nthyself'--blessed be God for what follows--'but in me is thy help.'\n\n \"The same Scripture which testifies the misery of man, reveals\nalso his remedy--a remedy of God's own providing, by which man may be\nrestored to the image and favor of God, and to that communion with\nhim which is life and bliss. 'God so loved the world, that he gave\nhis only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him might not\nperish, but have everlasting life: for God sent not his Son into the\nworld to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be\nsaved. And this is life eternal, that ye believe on him whom he hath\nsent.' When man becomes convinced that he is lost, helpless,\nwretched, lying at mercy, and submits to the method of God's own\nproviding; casts himself on the mercy of God in Christ, and coming to\nhim, rests on his free promise, 'Him that cometh to me, I will in no\nwise cast-out;' disclaiming all confidence in himself, or in his own\nworks, he accepts of God's offered grace, in God's own way, a _free_\nand _finished_ salvation. This is the record of God, that he giveth\nunto us eternal life, and this life is in his Son; who, of God, is\nmade unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and\ncomplete redemption. Believing this, according to his faith it shall\nbe. Christ shall be in him, 'a well of water springing up to\neverlasting life.' He will shed abroad his love in his heart, and\naccording to his promise, give him power to become a child of God.\nThe Holy Ghost, the Comforter, shall be given unto him, to teach him\nthe knowledge of the Scriptures, and to become a principle of\nholiness in his heart. Then shall he find that wisdom's ways are ways\nof pleasantness, and all her paths peace; then shall he experience\nthe blessedness of that man whose God is the Lord; then is the way\nopen for communion and converse with God the Father, Son, and Holy\nGhost.\n\n \"If, my dear Miss M----, I have made myself understood, you have\nmy view of God's method of making his creatures happy; and I believe\nhe will make us to know that he is a sovereign God, and that there is\nno other name, or method, by which men can be saved, but the name of\nChrist Jesus. But, take nothing on my word, nor the word of any\ncreature; search the Scriptures; read the first eight chapters of the\nRomans, the whole of the Ephesians: stumble not at mysteries--pass\nthem over, and take the milk for babes; pray for the teaching of the\nSpirit; and let me recommend to you the advice of Mr. Newton, in his\nOmicron's Letters, a book well worth your reading. 'Lay not too much\nstress on detached texts, but seek for the sense which is most\nagreeable to the general strain of Scripture.'\n\n \"My dear Miss M----, I am now old, and I hope have done with the\nworld; but I have been young and drunk deeply of youth's choicest\npleasures. I was blest with the best and most indulgent of parents; I\nwas the wife of a man of sense, sentiment, and sensibility, who was my\nvery first love and lover; and that love ripened and improved with\nyears. My children were good and healthy; love, health, peace, and\ncompetency blessed our dwelling. I had also, in early life, taken hold\nof God's covenant, and tasted his covenant love; and devoted myself to\nhis service, which was in my mind a principle of moderation, compared\nwith mere worldlings; but very far was I from that non-conformity to\nthe world which the precept of the gospel requires. Had I kept close\nto my covenant God, enjoyed his bounty with thankfulness, occupied my\ntalents, devoted my time to usefulness and communion with him; had I\nprayed against corruption within and temptation without, the Lord\nwould have directed my steps and held up my goings, and I should have\ncontinued to inherit the earth, and should not have been diminished.\nBut this was very far from being my conduct; the bent of the natural,\nunrenewed heart, is still opposed to God; and the best are sanctified\nonly in part, while in this life; the law in the members still wars\nagainst the law of the Spirit of life in the mind. The goodness of\nGod, which ought to have been a powerful motive to gratitude, love,\nand diligence, was misimproved; I enjoyed the gifts, and forgot the\ngiver; 'hugged my comforts to death.' Many, many light chastisements,\nmy dear, my kind, my indulgent heavenly Father exercised me with; I\nhad many repenting seasons under his strokes, many manifestations of\npardon I received, and many fresh and solemn dedications of my heart,\nlife, and substance did I make; but no sooner was ease and comfort\nrestored, than my heart turned aside like a deceitful bow: my whole\nlife, from fifteen till the thirtieth year of my age, was one\ncontinued succession of departure and backsliding on my part--of\nchastening, forgiving, restoring, and comforting on the part of\nmy God.\n\n \"He did not cast me off, but dealt with me according to the\nconstitution of his well-ordered covenant: 'If his children,'\nChrist's, 'forsake my law and walk not in my judgments, if they break\nmy statutes and keep not my commandments, then will I visit their\ntransgression with the rod, and their iniquity with stripes.\nNevertheless, my loving-kindness will I not utterly take from him, nor\nsuffer my faithfulness to fail; my covenant will I not break, nor\nalter the thing that is gone out of my lips.' Psalm 89:30. This is the\ncovenant--made with Christ as the head of all who believe--of which I\ntook hold in early life; my God kept me to my choice, and manifested\nhis own faithfulness and the stability of his covenant. When lighter\nafflictions proved ineffectual, he at last, at one blow, took from me\nall that made life dear, the very kernel of all my earthly joys, my\nidol, my beloved husband. Then I no longer halted between two\nopinions; my God became my all. I leave it as my testimony, that he\nhas been a father to the fatherless, a husband to the widow, the\nstranger's shield and orphan's stay. Even to hoar hairs and to old age\nhe has carried me, and not one good word has failed of all that he has\npromised. 'He has done all things well,' and at this day I am richer\nand happier than ever I was in my life. Not that I am yet made free\nfrom sin, that is still my burden--want of love and gratitude,\nindolence in commanded duty, self-will, and nestling in the creature.\nBut my heart's wish and earnest desire is conformity to the divine\nwill. The bent of my will is for God; and if my heart deceive me not,\nmy God is the centre of my best affections. It is by grace that I am\nwhat I am, and the same grace engages to perfect the work begun.\n\n \"This God is my God; he will guide me even unto death, through\ndeath, and be my portion to eternity. This God I recommend to my\nfriend; and this well-ordered covenant, this all-sufficient Saviour,\nfor your acceptance: the Bible for your guide, pray to God for his\nHoly Spirit to lead you to the knowledge of the very truth as it is in\nJesus. Accept this as a testimony of friendship, and believe me\n\n \"Yours, in love,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"NOVEMBER 2, 1800.\n\n \"You have, I find, been the child of affliction: she is a stern,\nrugged nurse; but blessed often are the lessons she teaches. I have,\nsays God, chosen thee in the furnace of affliction. It is God's\nordinary way of drawing sinners to himself, either to dry up or\nimbitter the streams of worldly comfort, that he may shut them up to\nseek that comfort that depends not on any transitory source.\n\n \"I have no doubt but you shall yet sing with the royal Psalmist,\n'It is good for me that I have been afflicted; for before I was\nafflicted I went astray, but now I have kept thy word. Blessed is the\nman thou chastenest, O Lord, and teachest him out of thy law.' Many\nare the texts to the same purport; take them for your consolation as a\npart of God's well-ordered covenant.\n\n \"You have met with a late bereavement, which has entered deep\ninto your soul. We are not called to stoicism, but to tenderness of\nheart and spirit. Jesus wept with the two sisters over a brother's\ngrave. But still, the Christian's spirit must be resigned, and say,\nand try to say with cheerfulness, 'Not my will, but thine be done.'\nAnd Oh, my friend, great will be the wisdom and happy the\nacquisition, if every new bereavement enlarge the room for divine\nlove in the heart, and be filled up with that most noble, most\nblessed of principles. Seek not, my friend, to replace friendship\nwith any mere worldling; beg of God to fill up the vacuum, then will\nyou be a great gainer.\n\n \"Why hesitate to join the church? Let not a sense of unworthiness\nkeep you back--a deep sense of unworthiness is one grand part of due\npreparation; and no worthiness of yours can give you any title to that\nnew testament in Christ's blood, which was shed for the remission of\nsins. Worthless, vile, empty, helpless is every son and daughter of\nAdam's race: but it was for the ungodly that Christ died; it was while\nwe were without strength; his name was called Jesus, because he should\nsave his people from their sins. In that day, that great day of the\nfeast, Jesus stood among a mixed multitude, and cried, 'If any man\nthirst, let him come to me and drink--whosoever will, let him take the\nwater of life freely.'\n\n \"If conscious at the time it is the supreme desire of your soul\nto be washed in his blood, clothed with his righteousness, sanctified\nby his Spirit, go and take this water of life freely; go as a\n_sinner_ to a _Saviour_; go at his command, put honor on his\nappointment, and repeat the dedication of all that you _are_,\n_have_, or _can_ have, over the symbols of his body broken\nfor you, his blood shed for you; go, trusting in his mercy, and leave\nall to his management, believing that _he will_ shed abroad his\nlove in your heart, order your footsteps in his ways, and in due time\nperfect his image in your soul. Keep close to him in the use of means,\nbut look beyond the means for life and power. I commit you to our God\nand Saviour, and pray that he may be to you 'wisdom, righteousness,\nsanctification,' and complete 'redemption.'\n\n \"I am, my dear Miss M----,\n\n \"Your ever affectionate,\n\n \"I.G.\"\n\n\n In March, 1801, the health of her daughter Mrs. B----, requiring\na sea-voyage and absence from care, Mr. and Mrs. B---- sailed for\nBritain, and the following letters were addressed to them during\ntheir absence:\n\n\n \"MARCH 23, 1801.\n\n \"MY DEAR CHILDREN--This is mortifying to us all that you should\nbe anchored half a mile from us, and there lie for hours; but even\nthis, trifling as it may appear, has its end to answer in _His_\nscheme, without whom 'not a sparrow falls.' I have retired with my\nBible, to commit you, and all my cares and concerns, afresh to that\nGod whose goodness and mercy have followed us through life; who is my\nGod, your God, and the God of our children; who answered my prayers in\nopposition to my inconsistent conduct; took you out of my idolatrous\nmanagement into his own more merciful guidance. He has done all things\nwell, and he will perfect his own work.\n\n \"Now, may the Angel that redeemed you, be with you, keep you in\nthe hollow of his hand, and as the apple of his eye; be with you on\nhis own ocean, and command the billows not to touch you; carry you to\nthe bosom of your dear native country, where a large proportion of his\nbody live in him and by him; bless you, and make you a blessing\nwherever his providence shall carry you, and restore you with\nblessings to us, in his own time. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, after morning service, March 29.\n\n \"This, my dear children, is a day of storm, wind, and rain. O\nthat the prayer of our dear pastor, and I hope of many present, may be\nwith you, and be answered to and for you: Lord, be with that family,\nwho now, on the mighty ocean, desire an interest in our prayers. May\nhe whom winds and waves obey, preserve them in this tempestuous\nseason; may they see and improve his wonders in the great deep; may\nthe blessings of the everlasting gospel preserve their souls in peace,\nconduct them in safety to their destined port, and restore them to us,\nenriched with the blessings of thy well-ordered covenant.\n\n \"I sent two notes for the Dutch churches, enclosed to Mr. B----;\none for Wall-street, to Mr. A----, and one for the Brick church, to\nMr. M----. I watered all with my tears.\n\n\n \"FIVE O'CLOCK.\"\n\n \"O, how it blows and rains. O my children, how my poor heart\naches for you; if not in danger, yet sick, and in much discomfort. I\ngave a note in the old church in the afternoon, supposing the\ncongregation on this dreadful day to be different. Mr. M---- prayed:\n\"The Angel of thy presence be with them; give them much of the\nconsolations of thy Spirit. Conduct them in safety to the place of\ntheir destination, and restore them, enriched with thy blessing, to\nworship with us again in this thy house of prayer.' I write on this\nday merely to record, for your perusal, the prayers of your church. I\nthink you ought, if the Lord conduct you safe, to propose public\nthanks to that God who heard and answered, if agreeable to Mr. M----.\nWrite me how it was with you on this day. Now I will go to a throne of\ngrace for you and all of us. O keep close to the Lord; may he save you\nfrom a dissipated, trifling, carnal spirit; may he sanctify all your\ncomforts, and give you a just estimation of all you see and hear: may\nthe Christian's portion rise more and more; and the world and its\nvanities sink in your view.\"\n\n\n \"APRIL 10.\n\n \"What the Lord is going to do with his and my children I know\nnot; but the Samuel Elam has returned to port with a leak, after being\nout nineteen days. On the day of storm, she had seven feet of water in\nher hold. I hope the Lord, in mercy to you, to his church, and to me\nhis unworthy servant, has guided you in safety, and that the prayers\nof his church were answered in your behalf. O, my children, what would\nbe the situation of my heart had I not confidence of your being within\nthe ark. I desire to rejoice over all my fears, for this unspeakable\nconsolation, that nothing can hurt you. I experience for you what I\ndid in my own case, when darkness and tempest added to the horrors of\nmany, while our vessel kept dashing on the rock: I, too, expected her\nto go to pieces every moment; but the idea was ever with me, 'in the\nbosom of God's ocean, I shall find the bosom of my Saviour.' On the\nnight of the 29th of March I dreamt my dear J----y fell overboard, and\nI saw her floating on the billows, supporting herself by her little\nchair: this is the state of my mind; yet I am thankful, and enjoy much\npeace. The Lord has given me what I have asked--the salvation of your\nsouls. In a little time we shall all be gathered around his throne.\nWell may I leave to him all intervening circumstances, as well as who\ngoes first, and how. O how he blesses my latter end, how he soothes\nand comforts my old age; far other things have I merited, that my soul\nknows; but he has not only pardoned, but comforts, and draws a veil\nover my transgressions, covering them from the world's observation.\nWhat can I say? He is God, a God of mercy.\"\n\n\n \"APRIL 17.\n\n \"I have brought the reality near me, that mine eyes may never\nbehold you again on earth. I can say, even of that, it is well; but\nthe idea of the horrors of tempest, a leaky vessel racked by the\nstorm, and sinking by inches; sickness, nervous timidity, and the\nsufferings to be undergone before the entrance to the haven of rest be\nattained, is my chief disquietude, I will not even say distress,\nbecause when these horrors--horrors they are to mere nature--dart\nacross my mind, filling my soul with momentary anguish, Satan too\nseeking to distract my mind, the Spirit of the Lord lifts up a\nstandard against him, and comforts me with his own word, the\neverlasting promises suited to every possible circumstance in the\nbeliever's lot. Thousands of times have I grasped that promise, 'Leave\nthy fatherless children, I will preserve them alive.' I pleaded it for\nthe life of their souls; He answered my prayers; he has given them\nlife, and they live to him. Yes, I see the fruit, and though\niniquities still prevail against them, he still purges away their\ntransgressions; kindles their repentance; humbles their souls; lays\nthem prostrate in penitential confession; washes them afresh in the\nopen fountain; restores to them the joys of his salvation; seals their\npardon by shedding abroad his love in their hearts, and making them\nwalk in the path of righteousness for his own name's sake.\n\n \"Thus he carries them on from strength to strength by various\nmeans of his own appointing, and some terrible things in\nrighteousness, in the course of his providence; in all which he is\nsovereign, but ever consistent with his new covenant name, as\nproclaimed to Moses on the mount, as manifested in the character of\nGod dwelling with us in our own nature, in whom mercy shone prominent;\nby which mercy they shall appear in Zion, before God, in due time.\n\n \"Is it so? Is this God my God, and the God of my seed? Is he\nhimself become our salvation? Are we heirs of God and joint-heirs with\nChrist? Is our life hid with Christ in God? When he appears, shall we,\nI and the children which he hath given me, in very deed appear with\nhim in glory? Is all this so, and shall I tremble at the approach of\nany of his providences? Shall I not say when it has taken place, 'The\nwill of the Lord be done,' especially when clothed with love? I trust\nthat as my day, so shall my strength be, and in the interim I have the\nsame confidence for you; for 'he giveth power to the faint, and to\nthem that have no might he increaseth strength.'\"\n\n\n \"APRIL 25.\n\n \"The wind roars and howls in my windows, though not facing the\nstorm, and the white waves in the river picture in my mind the foaming\nbillows of the ocean. The name of our God is my consolation: 'though\nthe waters roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with the\nswelling thereof, there is a river the streams whereof shall make glad\nthe city of God. God shall help her, and that right early.' When I\nwalk about Zion, and go round about her, when I tell the towers\nthereof, mark her bulwarks, and consider her palaces, my heart\nrejoices that 'this God is our God; he will be our guide even unto\ndeath; and O the joy that my children are the citizens of this Zion,\nand the heirs of all the promises by virtue of the new testament in\nChrist's blood. A covenant of works it was to our Surety, and his\nheart's blood finished the requisites of it. It is now a testament to\nyou, sealed by the same blood. Wherever in his word I meet the\ncharacter, the providence, the work of God, I read my own and my\nchildren's interest. I hope your experience shall be in Psalm 107:28.\nIf not wholly, it shall terminate in Psalm 23:4. Though you walk\nthrough the valley of the shadow of death, you shall fear no evil, for\nthis God, who is your guide even unto death, shall be with you, his\nrod and staff shall comfort you; and our darling Jessy he shall carry\nas a lamb in his arms, and hide her from the horrors, in his bosom. I\ndwell much on these subjects, and I feel comforted, whatever be\nthe event.\n\n \"If the Lord has carried you safe through, and you live to read\nthis in the body, know that our God continues to bless us abundantly\nin health, peace, and plenty, as to temporals; we also experience the\npeace of his covenant, and have tastes of the bread and of the water\nof life. Thanks, all thanks to our new covenant Head for the stability\nof the covenant; we change, but he changeth not. He himself is the\ncovenant given to the people, and because he lives, his people shall\nlive also, in spite of Satan and his colleague sin in our hearts: sin\nmay, and does bring his people into captivity, but it shall not keep\nthem in bondage for ever. The time of deliverance shall come, when\nthey shall revive as the corn. Oh, is it not a well-ordered covenant,\nand sure?\"\n\n\n Her next letter gives an illustration of fidelity in a difficult,\nand, it is to be feared, much-neglected duty.\n\n\n \"MAY 10, 1801.\n\n \"MY DEAR CHILDREN--Last evening was preparation sermon. Mr. Y----\npreached a very excellent sermon from the Song of Solomon, 'Who is\nthis that cometh up from the wilderness leaning on her beloved?' First\nthe wilderness of this world, next the church coming up, then the\nattitude leaning, and on whom; I thought the simile well supported,\nand practical, as he went on. His application was rich on the\nChristian's support, where he brought into view many of the names\nof Christ.\n\n \"After sermon we witnessed a most affecting scene; two female\nmembers rebuked and restored to the communion of the church. Never,\nnever did our dear Mr. M---- shine so bright in my eyes; many tears\nwere shed. I knew nothing of it, and wondered to what he was leading,\nwhen he addressed the congregation, after sermon, upon Christian walk,\nwatchfulness, and temptation, and the distress occasioned in Christian\nsociety when any of the members were left to fall into open and\naggravated sin. Such was the case in our own congregation: two, naming\nthe offenders, had been so far left; but while deeply wounded by the\nsin and scandal, he was consoled by their penitence: he assured the\ncongregation that they had given great evidence of deep contrition;\nand were now come forward to acknowledge their crime before their\noffended and grieved brethren, and to give all the satisfaction in\ntheir power, by submitting to the censure of the church in this public\nmanner, which, although painful to him, he must pronounce according to\nGod's appointment. 'Them who sin before all, rebuke before all.' He\nthen asked them to rise; scarce an individual turned to look; many\nwere weeping while he laid before them their guilt in strong, yet\ntender terms; and finished by expressing his approbation of their thus\nsubmitting to the rod, and exhorting them to humility and redoubled\nwatchfulness. Then again he addressed the members, requesting them to\nreceive into their Christian love and affection their repenting,\nreturning sisters; that they would treat them with tenderness, and\nrestore them in the spirit of meekness, considering themselves as also\nin the body and subject to temptation. 'Let no one put them in\nremembrance of the sin which the Father of mercies has blotted out,\nnor open those wounds which he has closed,' 'He doth not chide\ncontinually, nor retain his anger for ever.'\n\n \"May the Lord bless the discipline of his church; may he meet us\nto-morrow with multiplied pardons: may he melt our hearts to\ncontrition, heal our backslidings, and manifest himself as married\nunto us; may he bring us into his banqueting house and his banner over\nus be love; may his grace be magnified and his name glorified; and may\nhe send a portion to my dear children--yea, a Benjamin's portion; may\nhe open wide the leaves of that new testament, and let them read their\nrich inheritance and rejoice in their portion.\n\n \"Farewell, my dear children. The Lord bless you, keep you, guide\nyou, and cause his face to shine on you, prays your affectionate\nmother.\"\n\n\n The following to the same, was written while on a visit to a\nworldly friend:\n\n\n \"MAY 21, 1801.\n\n \"I would fain begin to hope that my children are now on, or near\nthe green fields of Albion. Many a severe gale has agitated them, and\ntried their faith and confidence before this day. But as He who\nsitteth on the clouds, commanding and governing the elements, is\ntheir own God in covenant, who loves them, careth for them, and\nperfects what concerns them, I hope they have had much of his\npresence: I hope they have found, even on the boisterous ocean,\namidst the horrors of the swelling deep, agitated with winds and\ntempests, all things necessary to life and godliness in these great\nand precious promises, accompanied by divine power, by which they are\nmade partakers of divine life, and escape the pollution that is in\nthe world through lust. I hope they are enriched in experience, and\nadvanced in the divine life, by all they have suffered, and all they\nhave tasted of divine support in their sufferings; that Christ is\nstill more precious, his word more tried, and their confidence in him\nmore established: if so, great is their gain. And our darling J----,\nbeing a sharer in the suffering, shall, at her God's hand, be also a\ngainer, though it be not evident to our perception. O how rich is the\nChristian, how inexhaustible his portion! his table is ever\nfurnished, his cup ever full; all is blessing, no curse mingled--that\nour Surety took to himself; prosperity and adversity, sickness and\nhealth, light and darkness, all, all shall bless us, work for our\ngood, turn to our profit, and end in the glory of God and our\nunspeakable, inconceivable happiness.\n\n \"I have been here a week yesterday; all vegetable nature glows\nand shines in the perfection of beauty; flowers, shrubs, trees, grain,\ngrass, falling waters turning the busy mill, the brook murmuring on\nits way to the ocean, fit emblem of eternity, all glorify their\nCreator; and although no such birds as in Britain charm the listening\near, we have some sweet chirpers of his praise; and what is wanting to\nthe ear, is made up to the eye, for in beauty they excel.\n\n \"These I may enjoy; with these hold communion; for Oh, spiritual\ndeath holds all within these walls in dismal bondage; not one symptom\nof life appears, but death, as the dry bones in the valley of vision.\nWhy do I not wrestle more for the Spirit to breathe on them? I do\npray: but Oh, formal, formal.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"JUNE 17, 1801.\n\n \"MY DEAR CHILDREN--Difficult it is for me to exercise patience:\nthe 23d, of this month will make three months since you waved the\nhandkerchief on board the Mars, off the Battery. I had made up my mind\nnot to give way to expectation short of three months; they are nearly\npast: how many events take place in that space of time; how many\nduties ought to be performed; how many sins are really committed; how\nguilty to wish to annihilate the time that a certain event may come\nround. For every moment of time we must account, and not one moment of\nit can we recall. Much you have seen; much you have suffered; much,\nperhaps, also enjoyed: for the Lord can give songs in the night, and\nin a dungeon. 'Surely his salvation is nigh them that fear him;' to\nthem there is no want. The Lord is their shepherd, he feedeth them in\ngreen pastures beside the gently flowing waters; if they wander, he\nrestoreth them, perhaps with the rod, but it is the rod of love; they\nneed not be afraid to enter even the valley of the shadow of death;\ntheir Shepherd is with them, and his rod, rod of support, and staff\nshall comfort them.\n\n \"I hope this has been a profitable time to you both; that you\nhave seen more of the evil of sin, and of your own hearts, their\ndeceitful double turnings and windings to cover and conceal the enemy\nof God and your own souls; more of the extent and spirituality of the\ndivine law, fulfilled indeed in every jot and tittle by your Surety;\nbut still doubly binding on you as a rule of life in the hand of your\nRedeemer, who hath bought you to himself, and taken you into his own\nhands, that you might be a holy people to himself, delivered not\nmerely from the penalty and curse, but from the power and indwelling\nof sin. I hope you have seen more of the unsearchable riches of\nChrist in all he has done and is now doing for your and his church's\nhappiness, and of those exceeding great and precious promises by\nwhich you are made partakers of the-divine life, and privileged to\nescape the pollution that is in the world through lust; more of the\nfaithfulness of God, as a God in Christ, pardoning sin and\nreconciling you to himself; and day by day, teaching you by his word,\nSpirit, and providences.\n\n \"I am but just beginning to see that I am blind; my own character\nopening upon me as a sinner, in heart and tongue and conduct, against\nmy God, my neighbor, and my own soul: how comes it then that I am at\nease in God's world; in health, in peace, in comfort, all in an\nextraordinary degree as to temporals; and as to spirituals, though\ngrieved with self, my joy in Christ also abounds. Can I believe it?\nWhat can I say; what can I render to the Lord for all his gifts to me?\nNothing can I do, but just take the cup of salvation, calling upon the\nname of the Lord, and remain an eternal debtor to his grace for\nspirituals and temporals.\"\n\n\n \"JUNE 26.\n\n \"By this time you are already in port, on earth or in heaven.\nBlessed alternative. Ought I to be sad, who can say, 'or in heaven?' O\nno, I trust grace will be given to acquiesce in his most blessed will;\na most gracious will it has been to me and mine.\n\n \"I wrote you in my last, that our dear Mr. M---- leaves us next\nmonth for Britain; his errand is to state the situation of this\ncountry, as greatly in want of ministers and the means of educating\nministers. Many of his people are dissatisfied, as he has two\ncongregations to supply, and a large family of his own. Why should he\nbe the man? For my own part, I think he is the very man; and I am\nthankful to feel a degree of disinterestedness. Though I love my\nminister, value his ministry and his person, I hope the general\ninterest of Christ's body is more dear to me, and of infinitely more\nimportance than my private comfort, which, after all, I do not believe\ncan suffer by parting cheerfully with its apparent food to Christ, who\nhimself is the sum and substance of all that any minister can be\ninstrumental in conveying. All means are alike to him, or no means. I\ntherefore rejoice in his will, and pray that the Lord may prosper him,\ngive him a double portion of his Spirit, and favor in the eyes of all\nwhose influence is necessary to advance the Redeemer's kingdom\nin America.\n\n \"Our friend Mrs. K---- is gone; she died suddenly: both Mr. and\nMrs. T---- died at their country-seat; he first. She fancied she was\ngetting better. The physician advised her not to ride, as she could\nnot stand the fatigue; she had more faith in air and exercise: the\nlast day she went out she fainted getting into the carriage, and again\ncoming out; and died in the afternoon. She lived near us, yet I never\nsaw her, nor offered one kind office towards the salvation of her\nsoul, which, if lost, leaves me not innocent of her blood, and if\nsaved, as I hope it may be, my sinful neglect is not the less. What a\npicture in them of the vanity of all under the sun; and in me of the\nevil of procrastination, for I meant to visit her. O my Saviour, is\nthis the return I make for the millions of pardons which thou hast\npassed on my account; sparing even the rod, and blessing me with\nhealth, restored limbs, and mercy on mercy, comfort on comfort? I want\nwords to paint my abominable ingratitude, indolence, and cruelty; and\nyet, Oh yet I am spared, and my mercies are spared, as far as I\nknow--but trial may be at hand. Perhaps I write what my children may\nnever read. Well, even then, mercy, mercy shall be my song; for I sing\nthe song on earth which they sing in heaven. I am just going to town\nto attend preparation sermon. Our feast is on Sabbath.\"\n\n\n \"JULY 17, 1801.\n\n \"What shall I render to the Lord for all his mercies--mercies\ntemporal, mercies spiritual, mercies eternal, multiplied mercies? The\none thing that I asked of the Lord has been answered in full, and Oh,\nhow much added. God himself become my salvation, and the salvation of\nmy house; how unspeakable the blessing. Although chastisement and\naffliction were the means of correction and sanctification, or even\nthe vengeance taken on my inventions, yet, as a God, he at the same\ntime pardoneth. For Oh, my character is ever the same with backsliding\nJudah and treacherous Israel. Glory to that name which is ever the\nsame, and changeth not. 'The Lord, the Lord God, merciful and\ngracious, long-suffering, abundant in goodness and truth, forgiving\niniquity, transgression, and sin.' This was his name among a\nstiff-necked people, an idolatrous, ungrateful people; this is his\nname to me alike in character. O how he has magnified this name to me,\na backslider in heart and life; multiplying pardons while I have\nmultiplied transgressions: still he has been last with me, healing my\nbacksliding; restoring my soul; leading me to the open fountain;\ngiving faith to wash, and joy and peace in believing; not only so, but\nin this land of drought, this waste howling wilderness, this vale of\ntears, where 'man is born to trouble as the sparks fly upwards,' my\ncup with temporal comfort is full and running over; all his creatures\nminister to my comfort; and as days and nights roll on, his daily\nprovidence adds, and diminishes not.\n\n \"I had hardly hoped to see the faces of my children again; for he\ncommanded, and raised the stormy winds and lifted up the waves of the\nsea; they mounted to heaven and sunk again to the deep; death with all\nits _natural_ horrors surrounded them; the deep yawned to devour\nthem; but God, their own God, was at hand, their anchor of hope, their\nark of safety, their hiding-place till the calamity was past: they\ncried to him, and he saved them out of their distresses; he made the\nstorm a calm, and the waves thereof still, and brought them to the\ndesired haven. This trouble was not unto death, but for the glory of\nGod and the exercising of your faith, for the manifestation of his\npower and goodness, and the enriching of your experience.\n\n \"O then let us praise the Lord for his goodness, and for his\nwonderful works to the children of men. Let us exalt him in the\ncongregation of his people, and praise him in the assembly of\nthe elders.\"\n\n\n \"OCTOBER 23, 1801.\n\n \"Surely, surely my heart feels grateful for the time, though\nthis, like every other good motion, will, like the morning dew, soon\npass away.\n\n \"My children not only preserved through the tempestuous storms\nthat threatened death with circumstances shocking to nature, but my\npoor sick child preserved during a long and fatiguing journey; that\njourney made comfortable, yea, delightful, by the warm reception of\nmany kind friends, dear to nature, and many doubly endeared by grace:\namong the last, the mother and sisters of the kindest and best of\nhusbands; they receiving her as their own flesh and blood, as well as\ntheir fellow-member in Christ; blest with a measure of health to enjoy\nall, and a measure of grace to profit by all; eyeing by faith the dear\ninvisible hand of a covenant God, preserving, leading, guiding through\nevery step--his love the marrow of the whole, and their charter for\nsafety, even amidst the dangers of prosperity.\n\n \"Is not godliness gain? profitable for this life as well as that\nwhich is to come? What is the portion of the worldling? even in this\nlife 'shadowy joy or solid woe,' without a balance to the first, or\nconsolation in the last; no sure footing in the one, nor support in\nthe other; distanced from the fountain of happiness by nature,\nprosperity incrusts their hearts and increases their carnality;\nnestling in their worldly comforts, they forget they are the creatures\nof a day, that an endless eternity lies before them, and only the\nfeeble uncertain thread of life between them and that curse under\nwhich they were born. Not so the child of God; all things work\ntogether for his good--_all things;_ his standing is not in\nhimself; his footsteps are directed by infinite wisdom: he is kept by\nthe power of God, through faith, unto salvation. Nothing can separate\nhim from the love of God. His life is hid with Christ in God: there is\ncause to rejoice always; his privileges are boundless, infinite, for\nGod himself is become his salvation.\n\n \"Have we then any cause for fear? Yes, my children, yes; though\nnothing can rob us of our charter, there is another side to be beheld.\nIn Christ we have all things richly to enjoy, but we have not all in\npossession: what we have is by faith; all is secured by our Surety for\neternity. We shall overcome by the blood of the Lamb; but by the\nconstitution of the covenant we must enter into that rest, that\nperfect rest, through great tribulation. While our eternal salvation\nis secured by our Surety, it hath pleased infinite Wisdom to appoint\nanother connection, which shall exist while we remain on earth: even\nthe connection between our steadfastness, consequently our comfort,\nand the means of grace which he hath appointed, making the first to\ndepend in a great measure on our diligent use of the last, insomuch\nthat a great number of the promises are proposed conditionally. Many\nexhortations are given in this view, and also many threatenings. 'They\nthat wait on the Lord shall renew their strength,' etc. 'Seek, and ye\nshall find; ask, and ye shall receive; knock, and it shall be opened\nunto you.' 'Abide in me; as the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, no\nmore can ye, except ye abide in me.'\n\n \"Close, intimate, near communion with God, is to be sought by\nmeans of prayer, meditation, and reading. If the Christian be careful\nto husband time, and set apart a portion for God, and set about these\nduties, he will not always miss communion; and this prepares him for\nother duties, and arms him against temptation; as the promise is\nconcerned to keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on Him.\n'If ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how\nmuch more will your heavenly Father give his Holy Spirit to them that\nask him.' 'So shall ye know the Lord, if ye follow on to-know him.'\n'Delight thyself in God, he will give thee the desire of thy heart.'\n'Nevertheless, I will be inquired of by the house of Israel,' etc.\n'If his children forsake my laws, and go astray, I will visit their\nfaults,' etc. 'Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation.'\n'But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet,' etc. 'Thy\nFather, who seeth in secret, shall reward thee openly.' All is laid\nbefore us in the Scriptures, in the view of comfort during our\npilgrimage, as well as the certainty of our inheritance in the end;\nthe ground whereon we stand, our danger, and the means of safety.\nSee Eph. 6:11.\n\n \"There is provision made in the covenant for great comfort,\nconsistent with human frailty and imperfection, but not with\ncarelessness and negligence. While, therefore, we rejoice in the Lord,\nwe have good reason to join trembling with our exultation; while\nstanding high in comfort, to take heed lest we fall, through the\ndeceitfulness of sin. We carry about with us 'a body of sin and\ndeath;' 'the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he\nmay devour.' We wrestle not with flesh and blood, but with\nprincipalities and powers,' etc. We live in a world lying in\nwickedness; the captives of sin and Satan exerting every faculty to\nbanish all thoughts of God, death, and eternity; contriving, with\nunwearied industry and amazing ingenuity, new gratifications for body\nand mind in endless variety, suited to all constitutions, all tempers\nand dispositions, and to those in all circumstances. Of these, the\nmost rational are the most subtle, and, in the hand of the enemy, the\nmost calculated to keep men ignorant of themselves, their misery, and\nof the great salvation; and alas, by these he often _spoils_\nunwary Christians, who, though heirs of heaven, heirs of God, and\njoint-heirs with Christ, are, during their minority, subject to like\npassions with themselves, and ever in danger of being spoiled of their\ncomforts when off their guard.\n\n \"With the people of the world Christians have much to do: they\nare fellow-members of society with them; they have many duties to\nperform to them, with them, and by them; many of the things of the\nworld are necessary to them, many of its pleasures lawful; for 'the\nearth is the Lord's and the fulness thereof,' and he gives them of it\nas his wisdom sees good for them. That which he gives them they gather\nin the same manner as and in society with the world, by industry and\ndiligence in their lawful calling and business. Keeping near the\nCaptain of salvation, and armed in his whole armor, they are safe.\nWhen off their guard, the vigilant enemy gains some advantage, and\nthey get into trouble. O how many gracious names our dear Redeemer has\nassumed in his word, for our comfort, our meditation, our spiritual\nexercise; how pleasant and delightful in the light of his countenance\nto analyze them! Besides the names peculiar to himself as God-man, how\nmany has he condescended to take from among men, and the natural\ncomforts and safeguards of men--our Shepherd, our Rock, our Ark, all\nthe relations in life--and ends with our All in all. But I must have\ndone, that I may tell you that goodness and mercy follow us in this\nfamily also.\"\n\n\n \"July 28, 1801.\n\n \"My dear pastor, Mr. M----, sailed for Britain. I thank thee,\ngood and kind Shepherd of Israel, for all those providences, which\nseemed small things at the time, that hedged me into that\ncongregation; for all the benefits and comforts I enjoyed under the\nministry of thy aged servant now before thy throne, and that thou\npreparedst thy young servant to fill his place when the time of his\ndeparture came.\n\n \"I thank thee for all the endowments of our young pastor, of\nnature and grace. I thank thee, that thou hast kept him faithful to\nHim who has called him, and for the precious treasure thou hast put in\nthat earthen vessel.\n\n \"Now, Lord, that thou hast called him to leave his family and his\nflock, to travel to a foreign land in the service which thou\nrequirest, go with him, prosper him, overrule all his concerns for thy\nglory, the good of his soul, of the church in general, and his own\nlittle flock in particular. Amen. Glorify thy name\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER VIII.\n\n JOURNAL AND LETTERS--LADIES' SCHOOL\n FOR POOR CHILDREN.\n\n\n \"NOVEMBER 22, 1801.\n\n \"ISABELLA SMITH,\" a grandchild, \"is very ill; she appears to be\nin a stupor. Two physicians are attending, but my eyes are to the\nLord. She is his own, given to him by faith, as a covenant God in\nChrist for her in particular, for ourselves and our children. I desire\nnot to draw back, but, the Lord strengthening me, to give up at his\ncall. If it be his will to spare her, she is still his own, to be done\nby, with, and for, as his infinite wisdom may see fit, for his own\nglory and her eternal interest. If he is about to remove her out of\nthe world, she is his own; out of the mouth of this babe will he\nperfect praise; with that company of whom is the kingdom of heaven,\nshe shall join in the song of Moses and the Lamb, 'to Him that loved\nus, and washed us from our sins in his own blood, to him be glory,\nhonor, dominion, and power.'\n\n \"O Lord, one petition I prefer--if it be thy will to take her out\nof the world, take her in thine arms and carry her through the dark\nvalley; grant to her a gentle and easy passage, and an abundant\nentrance into thy kingdom; and tune our hearts to sing, 'The Lord\ngave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.'\nAmen.\"\n\n\n \"NOVEMBER 23.\n\n \"This day the dear Isabella joined the church triumphant, and\ntook her place among that company which Christ has pronounced blessed.\nI yesterday asked of the Lord that he would take her in his arms and\ncarry her through the dark valley, that he would give her a gentle and\neasy passage, and an abundant entrance into his kingdom. He heard my\nprayer; it was indeed soft and gentle; not a struggle, not a groan;\nand the affliction which brought down the frame was moderate\nthroughout. I was enabled to resign the Lord's own into his own hand,\nin the faith that he did receive, and would keep that which I\ncommitted to him.\n\n \"My soul is satisfied--more than satisfied; I rejoice, and\ncongratulate the lovely babe on her early escape from a world of sin\nand sorrow, to the arms of her dear Redeemer, and to perfect\nblessedness with him.\"\n\n\n \"NOVEMBER 24.\n\n \"It is done--finished--the soul with God, the body in the tomb.\nIt is all well; yes, our covenant God, thou doest all things well. I\nfirmly believe thy mercy is over all thy works. Goodness, mercy, yea,\nloving-kindness has marked thy every step. I believe it now. I shall\nsee it soon.\n\n \"Now, our God, follow this bereavement with thy purifying,\nsanctifying grace. Enable us all to search and try our ways. Lead our\nsouls into a knowledge of the secret corruptions of our hearts, that\nwe may confess and mourn over them, wash in the blood of Christ, be\npardoned, restored, and get a great victory. Enable us through life to\nabide in Christ; to keep close to thee, transacting all our affairs\nwith thee, before they come into the view of the world. Let thy wisdom\nand thy Spirit, in connection with thy providences, be our\ncounsellors. O keep us in a dependent frame of mind, humble and\nwatchful. Strip us of all self-confidence. May we at the same time be\nstrong in the Lord and in the power of thy might; rejoicing in thee,\nthe God of our salvation, the strength of our heart, and our portion\nfor ever. Glory, glory, glory, to Father, Son, and blessed Spirit.\nAmen, and Amen.\"\n\n\n \"DECEMBER, 1801.\n\n \"It is my earnest desire to 'grow in grace, and in the knowledge\nof our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ,' It is my desire to love the\nLord my God with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my strength,\nand with all my mind; and to love my neighbor as myself, so as to do\nto Mm whatever I could expect from Christian principles in him, on an\nexchange of circumstances.\n\n \"It is my desire to give all diligence to add to my faith virtue,\nto virtue knowledge, to knowledge temperance, to temperance patience,\nto patience godliness, to godliness brotherly kindness, to brotherly\nkindness charity, that these things being in me and abounding, I may\nbe neither barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord and\nSaviour Jesus Christ.\n\n \"I desire to grow in grace day by day, to profit by every\nordinance of God's appointing, and by every providence; and I pray,\nLord, I pray that thou wouldst grant me my desire, so as that I may\nbecome more spiritual, more discerning in the Scriptures, more\nfruitful in good works: that thou mayest increase also my humility.\nOpen to my view more of the extent and spirituality of thy divine law;\nthe majesty, purity, holiness, of thy nature; the exceeding sinfulness\nof sin; the hidden corruptions of my own heart, and my inability to\nsearch them out, and to crucify them: give me also more just views of\nmy past life, that I may ever be convinced that I am, what I really\nam, the very chief of sinners, and the least of all saints; and that\nit is entirely of grace that I am what I am. O make out this promise\nto me; I will record it in thine own words: 'I will establish my\ncovenant with thee: and thou shalt know that I am the Lord,' Ezekiel\n16:62. I confess myself the character described in the two foregoing\nchapters; and though thou hast chastened me ten thousand times less\nthan my iniquities deserve, even by the constitution of the new\ncovenant, thou hast chastened me. Now, O Lord, most merciful and\ngracious, who 'pardonest iniquity, transgression, and sin,' for thy\nname's sake, do to and for me as thou hast said: 'I will establish my\ncovenant with thee; and thou shalt know that I am the Lord. That thou\nmayest remember, and be confounded, and never open thy mouth any more\nbecause of thy shame, when I am pacified towards thee for all that\nthou hast done, saith the Lord God.' Amen.\"\n\n\n To Mr. and Mrs. B----, in Britain.\n\n \"DECEMBER 7, 1801.\n\n \"I have received my dear J----'s three letters from Dingwall:\nfresh matter of praise to our covenant God. You have had your season\nof affliction; and now you have a season of refreshing, a\nresting-time. The cup of the Christian is always more or less mixed.\nYour afflictions have ever been mixed with much mercy, and now your\nseason of rest is also mixed. I well know that no temporal comfort can\ncompensate the absence of your justly beloved D----. He, however, who\nis the God of both, who goes with him, and stays with you, can not\nonly support, but comfort. The omniscient, the omnipresent, the\nomnipotent God is our God, and the God of our house; all that he is is\nours, to bless us. Behold, God is become our salvation. Every\nendearing name known among men he takes to himself, to inspire us with\npleasing, confiding love--every name that connects the idea of\nprotection, to keep our minds in quiet peace, in the assurance of\nsafety: Father, Husband, Brother, Friend, Prophet, Priest, King,\nPhysician, Help, Health, Light, Life, Counsellor, Guide, Sanctuary,\nAnchor--but I should fill my sheet. I said it all at first: God is\nours, and ours with the knowledge of all our backslidings, which he\nheals; our wanderings, from which he restores us; and our sins, which\nhe forgives: one of his names is the God of pardons. He delights in\nmercy. Are we not his witnesses? What has our whole life been, but\nsin, backslidings, and wanderings? What have his dealings with us\nbeen, but pardons, healings, restorations? Therefore we remain, as at\nthis day, with our desires towards him, and our faces Zion-wards. What\nhe hath begun he will perfect, and in a little while our eyes shall\nbehold him, our hearts shall enjoy him, we shall be like him, and see\nhim as he is.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"DECEMBER 26, 1801.\n\n \"I rejoice over my dear children, and bless our gracious God that\nhe has led them a sweet and most delightful sojourning among his\nchurches, animating their spirits by their mutual communion; blessing\nthem, and, I hope, making them blessings. I pray the Lord may make our\ndear D---- an instrument among others of spreading his gospel,\nbuilding up his church, and pulling down the strong-holds of Satan;\nand that you may be in your place a help-meet for him, in this as in\nevery thing else. May the Lord choose his path and direct his steps,\nand yours with him. Women were helpers of the apostles and others in\nPaul's days: at the same time care must ever be taken not to obtrude\nin any respect. I pray that you may be kept spiritual and humble:\neminence in God's service is truly desirable, if the heart be kept\nhumble. If the Lord open the eyes to behold more of the extent and\nspirituality of his law, the holiness and purity of his nature, the\nevil of sin, and its contrariety to all that is in God; and if he turn\nthe eyes inward to the hidden corruptions of the heart, when it is\nevident to the soul that all is of grace, then may eminent services\nbe safe.\n\n \"'I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes,' was the exercise\nof Job; and justly so. Job, who was eyes to the blind and feet to the\nlame, a father to the poor, and the cause which he knew not he\nsearched it out: when the ear heard him, it blessed him; when the eye\nsaw him, it gave witness to him; who withheld not the poor from his\ndesire, nor caused the eye of the widow to fail; the stranger did not\nlodge in the street, but he opened his door unto the traveller: all\nthis was true as far as the external act, and as he then thought, with\na proper temper of heart, Job could justify himself before his\nfellow-sinners, Blind like himself; but when God comes to deal with\nhim, how different his views. Then it was, 'Behold, I am vile; what\nshall I answer thee? I will lay my hand on my mouth:' even with the\nvery best there is cause for this exercise, could we see in the\nsame light.\n\n \"How deceitful is the human heart; how unfaithful the conscience;\nhow little do we know of the sins of our daily walk. We are called to\nwatch and pray, that we enter not into temptation; to walk with God in\nclose, intimate communion: whether we eat or drink, to do all to his\nglory: to consult him in all the affairs of life, narrowly observing\nhis providence in connection with our circumstances; weighing all in\nhis presence, requesting him to determine our wills and direct our\nsteps. We ought not to say, 'We will go into such a city,' and do this\nor that; but, 'If the Lord will.' How inconsistent our conduct with\nthese rules. How often do rashness, precipitation, and self-will\naccompany our determinations and movements. And how often do His\ngoodness and wisdom over rule our folly, save us from our own pits,\nand prevent the evil that might be expected. At no time does he deal\nwith us as we sin, though sometimes he stands by and allows us a taste\nof our folly: then we are in trouble, we dig our pits and fall into\nthem, but we cannot deliver ourselves. O what a God! who, even at such\na time, says to us, 'Call on me in the time of trouble; I will deliver\nthee, and thou shalt glorify my name; thou hast destroyed thyself, but\nin me is Blessed help; mercy to pardon, goodness to wisdom to guide,\nfaithfulness to carry through and perfect what concerns us, overruling\nour very follies, and causing them to teach us to profit. This is\nGod's way, according to many declarations of himself in his word, and\nthe experience of all his redeemed.\n\n \"Blessed then is the man that trusteth in the Lord; they truly\nare a blessed people whose God Jehovah is.\"\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY, 1802.\n\n \"MY DEAR, MY BELOVED CHILDREN--I trust the Lord is your support;\nI know you are in trouble; it cannot be that opportunities have been\nwanting all this time, nor can it be that my children have been\nnegligent: no, no, I cannot suppose it. My children are in trouble;\nthey could not write that they were otherwise, and therefore remain\nsilent until they can write the issue. It is proper, and sure the Lord\nfeeds me with comfort. O the comfort of knowing that the Almighty God\nis their own reconciled Father by an everlasting covenant; Christ, the\nMediator and Surety, their Advocate, Brother, and Friend; the Holy\nGhost their Teacher, Guide, and Comforter. It cannot be ill with my\ndear children, who are also God's dear children. My Father, I know it,\nthou chastenest for their profit. I know not where they are, nor how\nthey fare. I know not what to ask for them; but thou art everywhere\npresent, thine eye is upon them, thou knowest all their wants, all\ntheir burdens, all their bereavements, or whatever tries them. O let\nthy sensible presence be with them; open wide the leaves of that new\ntestament in Christ's blood, and let them read their rich legacy,\ntheir unsearchable riches in Christ; give them confidence in thy\nwisdom and goodness, and sweet acquiescence in all thy dealings with\nthem. Thou hast spared in mercy, perhaps now thou hast taken in mercy:\nyes, thy tender mercies are over all thy works, and a large ingredient\nin every cup thou puttest into the hand of thy children. It is well,\nit is well.\n\n \"Since writing the above, I have received my dear D----'s\nletter, second copy, by the way of London. The Lord is your God. and\nthe God of your seed. John the Baptist leaped in the womb when the\nsalutation of Mary sounded in his mother's ears; he was then a living\nsoul, and an heir of salvation at that moment. If your babe was\nconceived in sin by the first covenant, he is an heir of grace by the\nsecond. Think it not hard; no, you do not think it hard that you have\nconceived him in sickness, carried him in sickness, and suffered the\npangs of birth without the succeeding joy to make you forget your\nanguish. All this shall be for the glory of God, and that is what you\nseek; believe it now, you shall see it soon. I do sympathize; my fond\nheart had embraced a sweet babe added to the family for one taken.\nThe Lord has taken this also; it is his due: I shall soon leave the\nmortal and join the immortal; five have joined the head, six remain;\nand one I know nothing of, more than that I cast him on the Lord, and\nlook for mercy. I thank my God that he gave you the grace of\nresignation, and supported you in the solitary confinement. Alas, my\nchild, did you listen for the voice of your babe? O, what a suspense;\nbut let me stop--he had reached maturity ere that time; without the\nfight, obtained the victory; he is of the travail of the Redeemer's\nsoul; children are God's heritage, the fruit of the womb his reward.\nRest then in the Lord; this is to his glory, both without and within\nyour soul.\"\n\n\n \"MAY 20, 1802.\n\n \"MY DEAR CHILDREN--Here am I in my little room, surrounded with\nevery comfort, and as the provision of my God, I value all; but there\nlies the chief, _my Bible_, the testament of my dying, risen,\nascended, reigning Saviour, bequeathing to me eternal life, executed\nin full, and made as sure as the promise and oath of God. The\ninfluences of the Holy Ghost on my mind, taking of the things of\nChrist, and showing them unto me; opening wide the leaves of that new\ntestament, in which I read unsearchable riches, and my title to them\nsure: yes, sure, even to me, a base idolatrous gentile, a rebel\nagainst the eternal King, my Creator, Preserver, Provider; a\nbackslider in heart and in life. What has such a one to do with a holy\nGod? He hath said only return; and he himself hath turned to me,\nchastened, convinced, restored, comforted. His ways are not as our\nways, nor his thoughts as our thoughts; but as the heavens are above\nthe earth, so are his ways above our ways, and his thoughts high above\nour thoughts, and his plans above our conception. For although it is\nfor ever true, that he is of purer eyes than to behold evil, and\ncannot look on iniquity; that his law has denounced a curse upon the\ntransgressor who keepeth it not in every jot and tittle; it is for\never true, that this God is unchangeable in his nature and purposes.\nWhat he hath said, that will he do. It is for ever true, that I am all\nI have said, and worse, a sinner in heart, tongue, and practice; yet\nam I a beloved child, a justified one, an heir of God.\n\n \"Here is the testament, here is my charter with the seal of God\nupon it--JESUS, thou art the Secret of the Lord; thou art the Lion of\nthe tribe of Judah, the root and offspring of David. Thou hast\nprevailed to open this book of secrets, to loose the seven seals, and\nlay open its mysteries. Thou Lamb of God, the appointed and anointed\nto the great work; in our room, and in our nature, thou hast sustained\nthe curse. Thou hast obeyed the law; thou hast drunk the last drop of\nthe last vial of that wrath which would have sunk my soul in the\nendless depths of misery; and I never could have expended one drop,\nbut sunk deeper and deeper under it. O not unto me, not unto\nministers, not unto any creature be the praise. As for me, I am, in a\nword, all that is vile in myself; ministers, providences, afflictions\nare just what God makes them; without his blessing they will not only\npass without profiting, but Satan and corruption will make them\nministers to themselves. Worthy is the Lamb that was slain, for he has\nredeemed me with his blood. Worthy is the Lamb to receive power, and\nriches, and wisdom, and strength, and honor, and glory, and\nblessing--to him, to him alone, be the praise; who, of an heir of\nhell, hath made an heir of heaven, by a substitutional righteousness\nwrought out in his own person: mine by free gift, in which I am\ncompletely justified. To this work let nothing be added, with this\nwork let nothing be mixed.\n\n \"There is another work going on by the same Spirit of truth; also\nhis purchase and gift--sanctification. In this I am called to occupy,\nwatch, strive, fight. Life is given; means of support and growth\nprovided; weapons of warfare--all things necessary to life and\ngodliness: these are promised to the diligent use of means; and\npoverty, stagnation, discomfort threatened to the indolent. O how\nsovereign and gracious has my God been in his dealings with me in this\nrespect also. For a sluggard have I been in the days of youth and the\nprime of life; yet to me hath he given the comforts promised only to\nthe diligent. Here I sit on the verge of threescore; my heart in some\ngood measure loosened from the world, although in full possession of\nit. Health, ease, plenty, elegance, friendship, respectability; old\nage welcome, death unstung become a familiar friend, the messenger of\nmy Father to fetch me home to those mansions which my Redeemer has\ntaken possession of in my name. My hope is strong for my offspring.\nStately have been his steps of mercy towards them already, and he\nsaved them from their mother's snares; he heard and answered my\nprayers, for his name's sake, and overruled my practices; he is my\nGod, and the God of my children; the God of my children's children to\nthe latest generation; my cup is full of comfort, temporal and\nspiritual. O praise him, praise him, for he is your God, and the God\nof your offspring also.\"\n\n\n \"JUNE 4, 1802.\n\n \"Making allowances for the difference of time, and supposing my\ndear children in health, all about them is in a racket. This is his\nmajesty's birthday; and you are at this moment, perhaps, set in some\nsocial company, by invitation, to honor the anniversary, to repeat\nthe wish of long life, health, and comfort to the lawful sovereign\nof Britain.\n\n \"Here sit I in my dear little room, with a lovely landscape in\nview; B. M----'s park in velvet verdure; the full-grown trees\nscattered thin to display the carpet, and in full foliage; the clump\nof willows weeping to the very ground, with a gentle wave agitated by\nthe zephyr; while the other trees keep their firm, majestic posture;\nthe Hudson river covered with vessels crowded with sail to catch the\nscanty breeze; some sweet little chirpers regaling the ear with their\nshare of pleasure. I think I never heard any little warbler in this\nland sing so sweet as those which now salute my ear.\n\n \"These are thy glorious works, Parent of good.'\n\n \"Can all the philosophic ingenuity of London, this evening,\nproduce such a scene? The gardens no doubt will be glorious, but the\ngroundwork is also God's; but why say I that in particular? All is\nhis; the very notes that warble through so many guilty throats are his\ncreation; all the art of man cannot add to their number. Sweet bird,\nthy notes are innocent, O how sweet. Lovely trees--ye who stand erect,\nand ye who weep and wave; I wish no brighter scene. The shadows\nlengthen fast, so do yours and mine, my sovereign;* a few, a very\nfew anniversaries, and we must change the scene--change to where no\ncourtiers flatter, no false meteors blaze--where shadows flee away,\nrealities appear, and nothing but realities will stand in any stead.\n\n*Mrs. Graham received a pension as a British officer's widow until\n her death.\n\n \"O may we meet; for me, I nothing have, I nothing am. But One\nthere is, who was and is all that the mind of saint or angel can\nconceive of glory and of happiness; and he is mine, and I am most\nblessed. Lengthen on, ye shadows, until all is shadow on these orbs of\nflesh. Then, O then,\n\n \"'My captive soul set free\n From cloggish earth which oft has made me sigh,\n Ascends the eternal hills, as seen to see,\n As known to know, and grasp the Deity.'\"\n\n\n \"1802.\n\n \"Our friend B---- has now proved how far it is safe to leave the\nfate of eternity unsettled. He is gone to the state of the dead: with\nwhom his soul is gathered, He only knows whose mercy none ought to\nlimit; he is gone to his own place; if without a Surety-righteousness,\nwhich he sought not after in health, we know where that place is; but\nafter reading of a thief on the cross, nothing with God is impossible.\nMy mind is much impressed; that sentence rings in my ears, so often\nrepeated, 'I am determined to do all the good I can, and leave the\nrest to God. I have no time to search.' Oh, oh, one thing is needful.\n\n \"'Life's a folly, age a dream\n Borne along the common stream,\n Earth's a bubble light as air,\n If my rest be centered there.\n How can that be solid joy\n Which a moment may destroy?'\n\n \"Mr. B---- was seized with the fever in its most malignant form;\nfor him every genius was exerted, and the medical store ransacked for\nthe healing balsam, but in vain. The Judge calls for the soul, and the\nbody must, at his command, dislodge its tenant; how awful, if no\nsurety was at hand, if he must stand naked--we know the rest: did I\nsay we know? O no. What can we know of that wrath which in the garden\nof Gethsemane, when no murderous hand was near, no high-priest, no\ncouncil, or cross, wrung the blood through every pore of the pure, the\ninnocent Lamb of God, supported by Godhead. If such things were done\nin the green tree, what shall be done in the dry?\"\n\n\n Another of her grandchildren was shortly after removed by death;\nhis illness is noticed in the following meditation:\n\n\n \"AUGUST, 1802.\n\n \"'And that which cometh into your mind shall not be at all, that\nye say, We will be as the heathen, as the families of the countries,\nto serve wood and stone.' 'And I will bring you into the wilderness,\nand there will I plead with you face to face: like as I pleaded with\nyour fathers in the wilderness of the land of Egypt, so will I plead\nwith you, saith the Lord God; and I will cause you to pass under the\nrod, and I will bring you into the bond of the covenant.' 'And ye\nshall remember your ways, and all your doings, wherein ye have been\ndefiled; and ye shall loathe yourselves in your own sight, for all\nyour evils that ye have committed: and ye shall know that I am the\nLord, when I have wrought with you for my name's sake, not according\nto your wicked ways, nor according to your corrupt doings, O ye house\nof Israel, saith the Lord God.' Ezek. 20:32, 35, 36, 43, 44.\n\n \"It is good, yes, Lord, it is all good; too often have we said,\n'we will be as the heathen, to serve wood and stone.' Often hast thou\nchastened, often have we confessed, often resolved that we would walk\nmore softly, more tenderly, more circumspectly before thee. But, alas,\nwhen thy hand is removed, when thou healest us, and restorest to us\nhealth, comfort, and our pleasant things, we wax fat and kick, nestle\nin our comfort, abuse thy gifts, and lose sight of the giver. Alas,\nLord, thus it must ever be with us, when we keep not near to thee; we\ncannot walk one step alone without stumbling. Thou knowest these\nnaturally wicked hearts, that they are deceitful above all things;\nthey betray us before we are aware. Blessed, ever blessed be our God\nfor his well-ordered covenant. Blessed for the discipline of it. O\nLord, we are again in the wilderness, and under thy chastising rod:\nfor weeks past, we have 'eaten no pleasant bread;' thy rod is still\nsuspended over our pleasant, our dear child; the streams of life ebb,\nhe sickens, he dies, if thou interfere not. But the issues of death\nare in thy hand, and our eyes are towards thee. In vain are all means,\nall medicines, if thou impart not the healing virtue. Thy weeping\nservants seek the healing virtue from thy waters, thy seas, thy pure\nair. All nature is in thy hand and ministers thy pleasure; to some\nconveying health, to some disease. An herb to be boiled in simple\nmilk, as the figs for Hezekiah's boils, has been proposed, O let this\nprove the appointed means, or direct and point out that which thou\nwilt bless, and let our hearts and tongues give the glory to thee.\n\n \"We deserve this bereavement; but, Lord, what do we not deserve?\nEven according to the constitution of the covenant of grace, and\nconsistent with thy pardoning, saving mercy, and all thy\nlong-suffering, wert thou to take vengeance on our inventions, by\nexercising all thy threatened chastisements, should we ever be out of\nthe furnace? But even in this view, thou never hast dealt with us as\nour iniquities deserved. 'He will not always chide, neither will he\nkeep his anger for ever.' Thou hast, in thousands of instances, 'cast\nour sins behind thy back, into the midst of the sea; blotted them out,\nto remember them no more for ever. Thy ways are not as our ways, nor\nthy thoughts as our thoughts,' We may plead, 'Deal not with us as we\nsin; but according to the multitude of thy mercies blot out our\ntransgressions. Pardon our iniquity, for it is great.' Affliction is\nappointed, but it is 'in measure, when it shooteth forth.' O debate\nwith it, and according to thy promise, 'stay thy rough wind in the day\nof thine east wind.' Lord, say it is enough, give the blessing, and by\nthis measure shall iniquity be purged, and the fruit be to take away\nsin. All means are alike in thy hand, and any measure. In holy\nsovereignty and consummate wisdom thou afflictest, and in thy hand\nafflictions yield the peaceable fruits of righteousness: the hearts of\nthy people are melted, and they sing of mercy and of judgment, and\nglorify thy name. But, O Lord, a look, such as thou gavest to Peter,\nwill melt our hearts and restore our backsliding souls. The announcing\nof our pardon by the same power, will make them overflow with love. If\nthou but call us by name, as thou didst her who sought thee at thy\nsepulchre, with the same power we shall recognize our Saviour and\nworship him.\n\n \"O Lord our God, ever faithful to thy promises, thou hast said,\n'Whatsoever ye ask in my name, believing that ye receive, I will do\nit.' O Lord, I ask not the life of this child on this ground. I have\nthrough life asked one thing of thee, and that will I seek to obtain\nwhile life and breath remain, and reason and grace; I will seek it,\nseek it with importunity, holding fast by thy promise to do it, and\nbelieving that it shall be according to my petition. Make good to me\nthis thy promise, in a spiritual and eternal sense. Be my God, and the\nGod of my children, and of my children's children, to the latest\ngeneration. Let my children according to the flesh, be thine by\nregeneration of the Holy Ghost: it is a great boon; but hast thou not\nsaid, 'Open thy mouth wide, I will fill it?' Father, do as thou hast\nsaid: this is my one petition, and I cannot be said nay. I ask for\nmyself, my children, and my children's children, to the latest\ngeneration, the life which Christ died to purchase, and lives to\nbestow, that we may be made one with him, and our life hid with him in\nGod. Amen, and Amen.\n\n \"But, O my Father, thou hast said, 'Be careful for nothing; but\nin every thing, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let\nyour requests be made known unto God.' I ask, with submission to thy\nholy will, if consistent with thy glory, his good, and the good of the\nparents, the life of this child; that thou mayest spare him for our\ncomfort, but first for thine own glory; that thou mayest give the\ndifferent branches of this family a joyful meeting, a full feast of\ngrateful thanks to thee for all thy mercies; and our hearts may\nrejoice before thee for the abundance of comfort. Shouldst thou, in\nthy adorable wisdom, otherwise determine, thy blessed and thy holy\nwill be done. Wash the soul of this child in the blood of Jesus,\nclothe him with thy righteousness, sanctify him by thy Spirit, and fit\nhim in every respect for thy kingdom. And O, my divine Redeemer, I\nrenew my petition which thou didst so evidently grant in the case of\nour dear Isabella: take him in thine arms of mercy; soften and shorten\nthe parting pangs, and carry him gently through the dark valley, and\ngive him an abundant entrance into thy heavenly kingdom, to join the\nhosannas of thy little children, of whom thy kingdom is partly made\nup: and O, sanctify the affliction to all concerned; direct our\ndiscipline according as thine all-seeing, heart-searching eye sees we\nneed; that it may bring forth the peaceable fruits of righteousness,\nand 'the fruit of affliction be to take away sin,' and the glory of\nall redound to thee, Father, Son, and blessed Spirit. Amen, and Amen.\"\n\n\n \"SEPTEMBER, 1802.\n\n \"'What manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy\nconversation?'\n\n \"'O give thanks unto God, for he is good; his mercy endureth\nfor ever.'\n\n \"'How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God; how great is\nthe sum of them.'\n\n \"'If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand.\nWhen I awake I am still with thee.'\n\n \"'The Lord is gracious and full of compassion, slow to anger, and\nof great mercy.'\n\n \"'The Lord is good to all, and his tender mercies are over all\nhis works.'\n\n \"'All thy works shall praise thee, O Lord, and thy saints shall\nbless thee.'\n\n \"'He hath not dealt with us after our sins, nor rewarded us\naccording to our iniquities.'\n\n \"'Who is a God like unto thee, that pardoneth iniquity, and\npasseth by the transgression of the remnant of his heritage. He\nretaineth not his anger for ever, because he delighteth in mercy.'\n\n \"'He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us, he will\nsubdue our iniquities, and thou wilt cast all our sins into the depths\nof the sea.'\n\n \"'Let Israel hope in the Lord, for with the Lord there is mercy,\nand with him is plenteous redemption.'\n\n \"'And he shall redeem Israel from all his iniquities.'\n\n \"'The Lord hath done great things for us, whereof we are glad.'\nThe Lord hath turned our captivity, filled our mouth with laughter and\nour tongue with singing.\n\n \"Thomas,\" her grandchild, \"is restored to perfect health. Thou\nhast heard our petitions, and continuest to us all our pleasant things.\n\n \"It is a time of prosperity; thou givest us the 'upper and the\nnether springs;' thou blessest my children 'in their basket and in\ntheir store;' and while the riches of many are making to themselves\nwings and flying away--while many are sinking from affluence to\npoverty, falling on the right hand and on the left, by thy most\nmanifest providence thou hast preserved them from the wreck. O teach\nthem to acknowledge thy hand in all this, and to say and feel, 'Not\nunto us, O Lord, not unto us, but to thy name be the glory.' It is God\nthat giveth power to get riches. O, enable them to honor thee with\ntheir substance, and with the first-fruits of all their increase.\n\n \"In the day of prosperity let them rejoice, but let this joy be\nin the Lord. O let thy gifts ever, ever lead them to the giver, and\nfill their hearts with gratitude, their mouths with praise; and let\ntheir very actions be worship, while they acknowledge thee in all\ntheir ways, and thou directest their steps. May they be as 'a city set\non a hill, which cannot be hid,' and their light so shine before men,\nthat they seeing their good works, may glorify their Father in heaven.\n\n \"And now, O Lord, we wait for thy blessing in the restoration of\nour dear D---- and I. B---- and J----. 'Thou hast shown them great and\nsore adversities,' and thou hast manifested thy power to save. When\nthey passed through the waters thou wast with them, and through the\nrivers they did not overflow them. When they walked through the fire\nthey were not burnt, neither did the flames kindle upon them. For thou\nart the Lord their God, the Holy One of Israel, their Saviour.\n\n \"Thou didst stay thy rough wind in the day of thine east wind,\nand in the multitude of their thoughts within them did thy comforts\ndelight their soul. Thou humbledst them under thy mighty hand, and\nthou hast in the multitude of thy mercy exalted them in due time.\n\n \"In all their sojourning thou hast been with them; and in\nfellowship with thy church greatly hast thou comforted them. Thou hast\ngiven them favor in the hearts of thy people, and made 'the stones of\nthe field to be at peace with them.' And now, O Lord, restore them to\ntheir friends and Christian society, and to their place which thou\nhast in thy goodness given and preserved to them. Here may they be thy\nwitnesses, that 'thou art the Lord, and besides thee there is\nno Saviour.'\"\n\n\n \"SEPTEMBER, 1802.\n\n \"This day has the Lord our God answered our prayers, and enriched\nus beyond the ordinary lot of humanity. D---- and I. B---- and J----\nare restored to their preserved places, and to the bosom of their\nfamily. We are as men who dream; our mouths are filled with laughter,\nour tongues with singing; the Lord hath done great things for us,\nwhereof we are glad. Thou hast turned our captivity as the streams in\nthe south. We sowed in tears, we have reaped in joy. Bless the Lord, O\nour souls; ever true and faithful is his word: 'He that goeth forth\nand weepeth, bearing precious seed, shall doubtless come again with\nrejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him.'\n\n \"'O Lord, from thee is our fruit found;' may our sheaves be many\nand weighty, thou working all our works in us, to thine own glory and\nour blessedness. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"1802.\n\n \"Dear brother Pero,* happy brother Pero, thy Jesus, in whom thou\ntrustedst, has loosed thy bonds, has brought thee to that rest which\nremains for the people of God; thou drinkest of the pure river that\nmaketh glad the city of our God; of that blessed fountain from which\nissue all the streams which refresh and revive us weary pilgrims. But\na little while ago, and thou wast weary, dark, and solitary; thy flesh\nfettering and clogging thy spirit; thy God trying thy faith, hope, and\npatience, which he had previously implanted, watered, and made\nvigorous, to stand that trial more precious than gold that perisheth,\nthough it be tried by fire, and was made manifest to the glory of that\nSaviour who leaves not his people in any case. If need be, they are in\nheaviness, through manifold temptations; but he knows how to deliver\nthem, having himself been tempted.\n\n*Pero was an elderly man of color whom Mr. Andrew Smith had\n purchased, and made free.\n Pero had previously been a freed man of Christ. He had been for some\n time in ill health; Mrs. Graham kindly attended on him, and read the\n Scriptures to him: he died by the bursting of a bloodvessel, at an\n hour when none of the family were with him. Mrs. Graham, in humility\n of spirit, reproaches herself in this exercise, for having been\n absent from him, without inquiring into his situation for one hour.\n\n \"Thou hadst a taste of his cup: like him thou didst endure the\ncontradiction of sinners; like him thou didst experience the desertion\nof friends, even thine old mistress, whom thou lately didst esteem as\na sister in Christ, and to whom thou didst look for fresh\ncommunication from and through that written word, which she could\nread and thou couldst not. Oh, how did she prove as a broken reed\nunto thee; how did she neglect thy necessity, and her own opportunity\nof bringing forth fruit in its season. Thou hast been no loser. The\nLord passed by the slothful servant, the unfaithful steward, who\nneglected to give thee thy meat in due season, and himself took her\nplace; took thee from that household which was not worthy of thee,\nand led thee to those mansions of bliss which himself purchased and\nprepared; set thee at that table which shall never be drawn, where\nthou shalt feast on all the fulness of God, and drink of those\npleasures which are at his right hand for evermore. No need of old\nmistress now; no need of any earthly vessel now, nor of that written\nword which thou didst so highly prize. The Word made flesh has\nremoved the veil that shaded the glory of the God-man from thine\neyes; flesh and blood could not behold it; of this he has unclothed\nthee--left it with us to look upon and mourn our sin. Thee he has\nintroduced into the full vision of eternal day, where thou knowest as\nthou art known, and seest as thou art seen. O that full communion\nenjoyed between a holy soul and the perfection of holiness! O that\nlight of life, that ocean of love, that inconceivable blessedness.\nHow hast thou outrun us, brother Pero; how distanced us in a moment.\nOh, could I not watch with thee one hour? Oh that I had received thy\nlast blessing, instead of which, conscious offence, deserved rebuke,\npainful compunction wring my heart; and perhaps the rod of correction\nmay be suspended, and now ready to fall on my guilty head.\n\n \"Father, O my Father, am I not still thy child--still thy\nadopted? Have not I an Advocate with thee, Jesus Christ the righteous,\nwhom thou hearest always? does not the blood of Christ cleanse from\nall sin? yes, O yes. This is my universal remedy; thousands and ten\nthousands of times have I experienced its efficacy. Father, I again\napply; blessed Spirit, do thine office. Wash me, and I shall be clean;\npurge me, and I shall be whiter than snow. I confess my sin, I\nacknowledge mine iniquity. Thou didst bring to me an old disciple,\nnear and dear to his and my Saviour; thou didst require me to minister\nunto him all that he needed; the honor was great, the opportunity\nvaluable. Thou didst empty thy servant for a time, thou didst hide his\ncomfort, that I might, through thy written word, draw living waters\nfor him, and give him to drink. O the honor; O the negligence. Thou\ndidst send the call for thy disciple to come up to thee; in thy\nprovidence thou didst make it first known to me, that I might be\ninstrumental in conveying to him, through the same channel, oil and\ntrimming for his lamp. Great was the honor; dignified the service; but\nlost to me for ever. I passed by on the other side. Blessed, blessed\nJesus; thou good Samaritan, who pouredst the oil and wine into his\nwounds, and tookest him, not to an inn, but to those mansions in the\nskies which thou, with thine own blood, purchasedst for him; sanctify,\nO sanctify to me this thy providence; pardon my neglect. Saviour, wash\nme in thy blood, and sanctify and bring good out of even my\ntransgression. By thy grace, let it be a means of stirring me up to\nmore watchfulness, that I may meet the opportunities afforded me in\nthy providence, to occupy till thou come.\"\n\n\n \"DECEMBER, 1802.\n\n \"The lovely plant which the Lord had blasted, which brought down\nour hearts with grief, which he had restored and clothed with smiling\nhealth and comfort, again sickened, declined, wasted; every means\nproved ineffectual; the Lord refused the healing virtue. He was\nbrought to town to be near the physicians, but the Physician of Israel\naided them not. Disease increased; with pain, sickness, convulsion,\nmuch he suffered, and long; he had a taste of the bitterness of sin,\nbut no part of the curse: _that_ the Redeemer drank and expended;\nand having by his atoning blood purged this little one from his sins,\nand perfected all his redeeming work in his soul, he received him into\nhis own heavenly abodes. It is well, all well. Amen.\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham lived alternately with her children Mrs. Bethune and\nMrs. Smith until 1803, when Mrs. Smith removed from New York. After\nthat time she made her home with Mr. and Mrs. Bethune until her\ndeparture to her heavenly home. They loved her not only from natural\naffection, but for her superior worth. They believed that her prayers\nbrought a blessing on the family, as the ark of God did to the house\nof Obed-Edom.\n\n\n \"MARCH, 1803.\n\n \"I read this day the 36th chapter of Ezekiel, and pleaded God's\npromises from the 22d verse to the end, for myself, for my children,\nand for my children's children; for the church of God throughout the\nworld, in particular for this country, for Britain and Ireland, France\nand Germany, where his name was once known, and his gospel flourished.\nThat the Lord would 'build the waste places and repair the breaches;'\nthat he would 'purify the sons of Levi,' fill all pulpits with able,\nfaithful ministers of the new testament, who shall 'declare the whole\ncounsel of God;' and that wherever his name is recorded, the Holy\nGhost might fill the place, and convince the hearts of preachers and\nhearers, of sin, of righteousness, and of judgment; might take of the\nthings of Christ and show unto them; and that the great Head of the\nchurch might regulate and overrule all these breaches, differences,\nand shakings in his churches.\n\n \"O Lord, I am ignorant; I know not the mind of the Spirit of\npromise as thou knowest it. The promise of the fruit of the tree, and\nthe increase of the earth, of the corn, the wine, and the oil is\nthine, as are all others. I am ignorant how far this refers to\nspiritual prosperity, how far to temporal. I ask, O Lord, covenant\nprovision, the fruit of the seed sown in the hearts of men by thine\nown Spirit; and that thou mayest build the ruined cities of thy\nchurches, and fill them 'with men like a flock, as the flock of\nJerusalem in her solemn feasts; so shall the waste cities be filled\nwith flocks of men, and they shall know that thou art the Lord.' Thy\nfair, thy rich, thy beautiful creation is also the fruit of grace. The\nwicked possess it, but they enjoy it not. Thy people are the heirs,\nbut thou, as a wise and merciful Father, givest them to possess\naccording as thy wisdom sees safe and good for them. When with the\nthings of this world they imbibe the spirit of the men of the world;\nwhen they nestle in thy gifts and forget the Giver; when they enjoy\nwith a carnal spirit, and not with thankfulness and a due sense of\ntheir dependence on thee as the God of providence as well as of grace;\nthou, in mercy as in sovereignty, blastest their pleasant things,\nmixest their cup of prosperity with wormwood and gall, or sweepest all\naway with a turn of thy hand, that thou mayest teach them that man\ndoth not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of\nthe mouth of God; that thou mayest withdraw them from sinful purposes,\nand hide pride from them; that thou mayest open their ears to\ninstruction, and seal it on their hearts: thou dashest to pieces their\nbroken cisterns, that thou mayest lead them back to the fountain of\nliving waters.\n\n \"It is good, O Lord, all good; I lay hold upon it: be thou the\nprovider of me and mine; feed us with food convenient for us. Thine\nown word testifies that 'every creature of God is good, and nothing is\nto be refused if it be received with thanksgiving, for it is\nsanctified by the word of God and prayer.' I and the children for whom\nI pray, possess many, yea, and abundance of temporal good things. O\nLord, give suitable grace, grace for grace. Spirit of grace, keep us\nthankful, humble, dependent, spiritual; enable us to receive all\nthrough a covenant channel, as the provision of our Father by the way,\nthrough this wilderness. O may all be sanctified by thy word and\nprayer, and we be enabled 'to eat and drink to thy glory.' Amen.\n\n \"Read the 138th Psalm: 'Though the Lord be high, yet hath he\nrespect unto the lowly; though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou\nwilt revive me. The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me; thy\nmercy, O Lord, endureth for ever; forsake not the works of thine\nown hands.'\n\n \"Redeeming work is thy work; regenerating work is thy work;\nsanctifying work is also thine.\n\n \"The first is finished, the second begun, to be perfected in the\nthird. O Lord, I hang on thy promises, which with Christ are all mine,\nthough I have not at all times the savor of them; this is mine\ninfirmity, and often my sin. O keep me looking unto Jesus.\"\n\n\n \"MARCH 25, 1803.\n\n \"Communion Sabbath, Dr. M---- preached from Romans 6:17: 'But God\nbe thanked that ye were'--were in the past time, not now--'the\nservants of sin; but ye have obeyed from the heart that form of\ndoctrine which was delivered you.'\n\n \"O Lord, I believe the doctrines of thy gospel; I know that I am\ndelivered from sin as a master; it hath not dominion over my will, nor\nentire dominion over my affections; I would be thine, thy servant, thy\nchild, thine in all obedience. I feel this new principle in the\ndesires of my soul. I would do all things to thee, in act and in\nprinciple. But O, Lord, the old man is still here, harassing and\nhindering my new will, which I have received from thee, from acting\nwith freedom and energy. Unhallowed motives steal in, by-ends present\nthemselves; and when outward duty is attained to, there is more of sin\nthan of righteousness. Though entered upon with some measure of\npurity, yet before it is finished I am at a loss to discern the true\nprinciple by which I am actuated. Lord, help me; hast thou not\npromised to work in me both 'to will and to do of thy good pleasure?'\nIs it not the grand end of thy death, that thou mightest purify to\nthyself a glorious church, 'not having spot nor wrinkle, nor any such\nthing;' and shall not I be a partaker? Art thou not made of God unto\nthy people, wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption?\n\n \"O Lord, my heart pants for redemption from indwelling sin. This\ndepravity of my nature, this opposition, this evil that is ever\npresent with me when I would do good, this indolence, this\nlistlessness, this want of zeal, or else self-will, keenness of\ntemper, impatience, haste: O Lord, there is a host of enemies; gird\nme, arm me, shield me, lead me forth under thy banner; be my\nvictorious King. 'I will go in thy name, trusting in thy promised\nstrength and grace to help in every time of need.' Glory be to God,\nFather, Son, and blessed Spirit, for the grace in which I stand. But\nfor grace I had been a willing slave to sin to this hour. By that same\ngrace I shall one day attain to victory. I cast my burden on the Lord,\nhe will sustain until he deliver; I will go up through the wilderness,\ntrusting in the promises, and continue fighting in his strength. 'My\nsoul waits for thy salvation.' Lord, enable me to keep 'looking unto\nJesus, the author and finisher of faith.' O give faith in every part\nof his mediatorial character. May I feed upon him and be strong for\nthis sore fight. Give courage, O Lord; press me forward: may I\nresolve, and keep the resolution, to resist unto blood, striving\nagainst sin.\n\n \"I have been a slothful servant in thy family, an idle laborer in\nthy vineyard, 'an unfruitful branch,' a poor dwarfish member in thy\nbody. Grant, O grant a little fruit on the topmost bough. O, at the\n'eleventh hour' may I begin to work, to bear some fruit, to the glory\nof that grace by which my soul is saved from the wages of sin, death,\nand hell, and made heir, by free gift, of the wages of righteousness,\neternal life, and glory. I wait for thy salvation.\"\n\n\n There being no public, free, or Sabbath-schools in the city, Mrs.\nGraham used her endeavors to promote such as would at least furnish\neducation to the children of the widows under her care; and several\nyoung ladies offered their services, which she thus notices:\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY, 1804.\n\n \"A new thing is on the wheel in the city of New York. A society\nof ladies, organized for the purpose of relieving widows with small\nchildren, was new in this country. It is now, by the blessing of God,\napparently established. It was entered upon with prayer; it has been\nconducted thus far with prayer. The blessing of God has rested upon\nit, and much good has been done by it. Some of us have looked long,\nand requested of God to open a way by which the children of these\nwidows might be instructed and taught to read his word, and by his\nblessing on it, come to the knowledge of the way of salvation. One\nmeans has been attempted of an ordinary kind: twelve children were\nlast week placed at school with Mrs. L----, to be taught to read, and\nsome more are to be placed with another of our widows, for the same\npurpose. But this indeed is new. A society of young ladies, the first\nin rank in the city, in the very bloom of life, and full of its\nprospects, engaged in those pleasures and amusements which tend to\nengross the mind and shut out every idea unconnected with them, coming\nforward and offering--not to contribute towards a school, but their\nown personal attendance to instruct the ignorant, O Lord, prosper\ntheir work. If this be of thee, it shall prosper, and be productive of\nmuch good; but if thou bless not, it will come to nothing but shame.\nNo good can be done but by thee, for there is none good but One;' and\nwhat are all thy creatures, but instruments in thy hand, by which thou\nbringest to pass the purposes of thy will? _Christians_,\nredeemed, enlightened, sanctified, are no more; thou workest all their\nworks in them; they themselves are thy workmanship, created in Christ\nJesus unto good works, which thou hast prepared, that they should walk\nin them. Worldlings also are thy instruments: by them thou workest and\nbringest to pass the counsels of thy will; thou puttest into their\nheart the good thing which thou workest, and girdest them for the\npurpose: though not the children of thy covenant, they are the\ninstruments of thy providence.\n\n \"O Lord, take up this matter; gird these young women to this very\npurpose, and prosper them in the art of teaching these orphans of thy\nprovidence. And Oh, Lord, hear my more important petition. I am not\nworthy to be heard. O Lord, I am not worthy to be named in connection\nwith any good done by thee. I am the chief of sinners, the chief of\nbacksliders; every thing in me, of me, or by me, is vile as far as it\nis mine. All that is otherwise, all good implanted in me, or done by\nme, is thine own; it is grace, free grace, the purchase of thine own\nAnointed, my dear Redeemer, my dying, risen, ascended Saviour, and the\nfruit of the Holy Ghost, the sent of the Father and of the Son, to set\nup a kingdom of righteousness in the hearts of the redeemed. Let me,\nas a sinner saved by grace, to whom thou hast been pleased to give the\nexceeding great and precious promises--let me, under the sprinkling of\nthe blood of the covenant, and in entire dependence on my\nsurety-righteousness--let me draw near and present my petition, in the\nname and for the sake of Him whom thou hearest always. O Lord God\nAlmighty, by this very thing, build up thy Zion. Lay hold of these\nyoung creatures, and while they are in the way of thy providence,\nbring them to the house of our master's brethren. O thou great\nTeacher, teach thou teacher and taught. Be found of them who seek thee\nnot, and say with power, 'Behold me, behold me,' to a people not yet\ncalled by thy name, and out of this small thing in thy providence,\nbring revenues of praise to thy name as the God of grace. Amen.\n\n \"And now, O Lord, for myself, I pray for deep humility; I ask,\nfor His sake who was meek and lowly, to be kept where my place really\nis, at the feet of all thy servants; and if it be thy pleasure to make\nme a useful instrument, in proportion make me a humble soul. Let me\never remember my ways and be ashamed, and never open my mouth any more\nbecause of my shame, when thou art pacified towards me for all that I\nhave done. O keep me in this contrite frame of mind. In all that to\nwhich thou callest me, give me a willing heart, and furnish me with\nevery necessary for thy glory. And now prepare me to speak to these\nyoung women good and acceptable words. Save me from sacrificing truth,\nor departing, in any respect, from Christian duty; give me such wisdom\nas maybe suited to the occasion: in all things mine eyes are to the\nLord; from thee let my fruit be found.\"\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY 17, 1804.\n\n \"Saturday, the 11th, twenty-nine young ladies met with Mrs.\nHoffman and myself, at Mr. O. Hoffman's, Wall-street, on purpose to\nreceive instructions respecting the school; and having paired\nthemselves according to their mind, I delivered what I had prepared\nfor them: they all seemed hearty in their engagement; and on Monday,\nthe 13th inst., Miss L----t and Miss L----n attended at the\nschool-room and commenced teaching thirteen children; four have been\nadded since.\n\n \"Again, O Lord, let me request thy blessing on this institution;\nput thy seal upon it, and mark it for thine own. Gird the teachers for\ntheir work, and open the minds of the scholars to instruction. And O,\nLord, in thine own time, and by means of thine own devising, provide\nspiritual instruction for teachers and taught. Is it thy pleasure,\nLord, that I attend the children on a day appointed for the purpose?\nWilt thou accept of me as an instrument by which thou wilt do good to\nthe souls of these children; and wilt thou keep me humble and contrite\nin my own soul? Bless also Mrs. L----'s school; there too let thy work\nappear; deal with her soul as 'thou dealest with thy chosen;' teach\nher the way of salvation, and make her a teacher by thine own Spirit.\nIf it be my dear Master's pleasure to use me, I would also attend that\nschool as his instrument. 'Search me, O Lord, and know my heart; try\nme, and know my thoughts; and see if there be any wicked way in me,\nand lead me in the way everlasting.'\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham's address to the young ladies, above alluded to, is\ngiven as a specimen of the appropriateness of her addresses on similar\noccasions, and as an incentive to kindred exertions in every condition\nof life.\n\n\n \"MY DEAR YOUNG LADIES--Every thing new becomes matter of\nspeculation and variety of opinion.\n\n \"An association of ladies for the relief of destitute widows and\norphans, was a new thing in this country. It was feeble in its origin,\nthe jest of most, the ridicule of many, and it met the opposition of\nnot a few. The men could not allow our sex the steadiness and\nperseverance necessary to establish such an undertaking. But God put\n_his_ seal upon it; and under his fostering care it has prospered\nbeyond the most sanguine expectations of its propagators. Its fame is\nspread over the United States, and celebrated in foreign countries. It\nhas been a precedent to many cities, who have followed the laudable\nexample. This fame is not more brilliant than just. The hungry are\nfed, the naked are clothed, shelter is provided for the outcasts,\nmedicine and cordials for the sick, and the soothing voice of sympathy\ncheers the disconsolate. Who are the authors of all these blessings?\nYour mothers, ladies, the benevolent members of this so justly famed\nSociety. But who are these children that idly ramble through the\nstreets, a prey to growing depravity and vicious example? hark, they\n_quarrel_, they _swear_, and such no doubt will _lie_ and _steal_. And\nthat group of dear little creatures, running about in the most\nimminent danger, apparently without protection, are they under the\ncare of this so justly famed society? They are; they are fed, they are\nclothed, their mother's fireside is made warm for them; but no culture\nis provided for their minds, nor protection from baneful example.\nThese will in time follow that of the older ones, and grow up the\nslaves of idleness and vice, the certain road to ruin.\n\n \"Alas, alas, and is there no help--no preventive? Yes, there is.\nBehold the angelic band; hail, ye virtuous daughters; worthy of your\nvirtuous mothers, come forward and tread in their steps. Snatch these\nlittle ones from the whirling vortex; bring them to a place of safety;\nteach them to know their Father, God: tell them of their Saviour's\nlove; lead them through the history of his life; mark to them the\nexample he set, the precepts he recorded for their observance, and the\npromises for their comfort. And by teaching them to read, enable them\nto retrace all your instructions when their eyes see you no more.\n\n \"My dear young ladies, the sacrifice you have made shall most\nassuredly meet its reward: but like your mothers, you will experience\nmuch painful banter, you will be styled school-madams. Let it pass;\nsuffer it quietly; when your scheme begins to ripen and the fruits\nappear, who shall be able to withhold their praise? Only be steadfast,\ndraw not back and justify the prophecies of many.\n\n \"A great general, in ancient times, in search of glory, landed\nhis troops on the hostile coast, and then burnt all his ships: they\nmust conquer, or die. You have, ladies, already embarked in this\ndesign; there is no remaining neuter now; your name and undertaking\nare in every mouth; you must press forward and justify your cause: and\njustified it shall be, if you persevere; it cannot be otherwise. The\nbenevolence you contemplate is as superior to that already in\noperation, as the interest of the soul is to that of the body; and it\nis your own--the very scheme originated in a young mind in this\ncompany. The society were contemplating mercenary agents, schools for\npay, and one is already established.\n\n \"But this labor of love; who could have hoped for it? A society\nof _young ladies,_ in rank the first in the city, in the very bloom\nof life, and full of its prospects, engaged in those pleasures and\namusements which generally engross the mind, and shut out every idea\nunconnected with self, coming forward and offering--what? not their\npurses, that were _trash;_ but their own personal services to\ninstruct the ignorant, and become the saviors of many of their sex.\nIt is indeed a new thing, and more strange in this age of dissipation\nthan that institution from which it sprung. May this too become the\ndarling of Providence. May God put his seal upon this also. May he\nbless and prosper you in this undertaking, bless you, and make you\na blessing.\"\n\n\n We next have her wrestling supplications for the revival of God's\nwork in the church with which she was connected.\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY 21, 1804.\n\n \"O Thou, who art Alpha and Omega, the first and the last, who\nholdest the seven stars in thy right hand, and walkest in the midst of\nthe seven golden candle-sticks, who livest and was dead, and art alive\nfor evermore. Amen. And hast the keys of hell and of death. Out of thy\nmouth goeth a sharp twoedged sword, by which thou reachest the hearts\nof the most hardened. O write with power, speak with power, in the\nheart of the angel of this church. Hast thou not in former days had\nthy dwelling among them? in days of trouble didst thou not work in\nthem the fruits of labor and patience, so that for thy name's sake\nthey labored and fainted not? Thou blessedst them and gave them peace,\nand they rejoiced in the light of thy countenance; thou multipliedst\nthem also, so that from a handful they became _two bands_. Alas,\nLord, we have, Jeshurun-like, 'waxed fat and kicked;' we have left our\nfirst love; we have not watched and prayed, as thou gavest\ncommandment, and thou hast left us to enter into temptation; we have\nforsaken the counsel of our old men, and given heed to flatterers; we\nhave forgotten our dependence on thee, and said, 'Ashur shall save us,\nwe will ride upon horses.' We have set up our idols in our hearts, and\nput the stumbling-block of our iniquity before our eyes; we have taken\ncounsel, but not of thee, and covered ourselves with a covering, but\nnot of thy Spirit; we have gloried in our own wisdom, and strengthened\nourselves in our own strength.\n\n \"We are poor, and blind, and miserable, and naked; rich in our\nfancied wisdom, seeing by our own light, and compassing ourselves\nabout with our own sparks; we feed on ashes: a deceived heart has\nturned us aside.\n\n \"'O Lord, the hope of Israel, and the Saviour thereof.' It is of\nthe Lord's mercies that we are not consumed. To us belong shame and\nconfusion of face--O cover us with it--but to thee belongs mercy.\nHumble us, O Lord, and we shall be humbled; 'turn us, and we shall\nbe turned.'\n\n \"It is in our nature to backslide for ever; thou, and thou only,\nknowest the deceitfulness of the heart; thou, and thou only, canst\nsearch it. O search us, and try us, and show us what wicked ways there\nare in us, and lead us in the way everlasting. Deal not with us\naccording to our sins, but according to the multitude of thine own\nmercies. We have no other plea; our sins call for judgment, and until\nthou, thine own blessed self, turn us, we are in no situation to\nreceive mercy. Work with us for thy name's sake, establish with us\nthine own covenant of free, unmerited, undeserved mercy. Then shall we\nknow that thou art the Lord.\n\n \"Make us thine by thine own covenant, established in Christ,\nthine own anointed; the blessed surety, by thine own appointment; our\nsubstitute, on whom it hath pleased thee to lay the iniquities of us\nall; in whose sacred person thou tookest vengeance for all our sins;\nby whom thy law is fulfilled, magnified, and made honorable; whose\ndoing and suffering in our stead is accepted by Jehovah. 'The Lord is\nwell pleased for his righteousness' sake.' No covenant short of one\nfulfilled in every jot and tittle could benefit us.\n\n \"Thy covenant is well-ordered in all things, and it is sure.\n\n \"Here, O Lord, I take my stand; here I lay my foundation, and on\nthis thy covenant I build; or rather, here thou thyself hast laid my\nfoundation, and on this rock hast thou set my soul and built my hopes,\nthou subduing my enmity. I acquiesce. I will now 'remember the years\nof thy hand,' look back to thy dealings with thine own nation, whom\nthou didst choose and set apart from all other nations, though of the\nsame blood with all those that dwell on the face of the whole earth.\n\n \"They, like us, destroyed themselves, but in thee was their help.\nThey also sinned, committed iniquity, and did wickedly; they\nremembered not thy mercy, but provoked thee at the Red sea, after the\ngreat deliverance thou hadst wrought for them, and the wonders thou\nmadest to pass before them in the land of Egypt. Nevertheless thou\nsavedst them for thy name's sake, that thou mightest make thy mighty\npower known; thou didst repeat thy wonders, and didst dry up the sea\nbefore them. He fed them with corn from heaven; they did eat angel's\nfood. He clave the rock in the wilderness, and caused waters to run\ndown like a river. After all, they forsook the God of their mercies;\nthey believed not his promises, nor trusted in his salvation; they\nlusted, and they murmured, and desired to turn back to Egypt. Thou\ndidst chasten them sore for their sin, and didst bring down their\nheart with grief.\n\n \"When thou didst slay them, they sought thee, and remembered\nthat God was their rock, and the most high God their Redeemer.\nNevertheless they did flatter with their mouth and lied unto thee with\ntheir tongue, for their heart was not right with thee, neither were\nthey steadfast in thy covenant. But thou being full of compassion,\nforgavest their iniquity and destroyedst them not; yea, many a time\nturnedst thou away thine anger, and didst not stir up all thy wrath.\n\n \"O how many times did they turn back, tempted God, and limited\nthe Holy One of Israel. Yet did he fulfil all his promises, and by\nwonders in the sea, wonders in the desert, wonders in Zoan's field,\nand in the camps of their enemies, he led them safely to the border of\nhis sanctuary, to the mountain which his right hand had purchased. He\ncast out the heathen before them, and gave them rest in the land of\npromise. Even there they provoked the Most High, provoked him to\njealousy with their graven images.\n\n \"Again thou didst chasten them sore, let loose the corruptions of\nmen upon them, and suffer them to fall before their enemies. Thou\ndeliveredst thy strength into captivity, and thy glory into the hands\nof their enemies.\n\n \"Yet, O Lord, again didst thou deliver them, and sentest\nprovision for them by thine own covenant. Thou didst choose David thy\nservant, and take him from the sheep-folds. Thou broughtest him to\nfeed Jacob thy people, and Israel thine inheritance. So he fed them\naccording to the integrity of his heart, and guided them by the\nskilfulness of his hands.\n\n \"Such are the people with whom thou hast still to do. Such, O God\nof infinite mercy, such the God with whom we sinners have to do, even\n'the Lord God, merciful and gracious, keeping mercy for thou sands,\nforgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin; and that will by no means\nclear the guilty.' O what could man or angel have done with this last\ncharacter of thy name? Thy covenant makes provision. In Christ Jesus,\nour blessed substitute, all is reconciled. Thy name is one; the just\nGod, and the justifier of the ungodly who believe in Jesus; This God\nis our God; we will make mention of his righteousness, and his only.\nBy his own covenant, in his own time, and by means of his own\nproviding, he will revive us. Amen.\"\n\n\n \"APRIL, 1804\n\n \"All my desire is before thee, and it is all contained in thy\nwell-ordered covenant. Many years of vanity, of idolatry, of\nbacksliding, wandering, and folly have passed over my head since I\nfirst took hold of thy covenant. How fickle, false, and deceitful have\nI proved; yet thou knowest, thine own Spirit through all my wanderings\ntestified in my heart, that out of the channel of this covenant there\ncould be neither safety nor comfort; and never, so far as I can\nremember, have I deliberately chosen to be dealt with by any other.\nIts corrections and chastisements have reached the deepest\nsensibilities of my heart. Thine arrows stuck fast in me, thy hand\npressed me sore; there was no soundness in my flesh, neither rest in\nmy bones, because of my sin; mine iniquities went over my head, were a\nburden too heavy to bear. I was feeble and sore broken, and roared by\nreason of the disquiet of my heart. My lovers and friends stood aloof\nfrom my sore, and my kinsmen stood afar off. I was ready to halt, and\nmy sorrow was continually before me; yet even in my darkest, deepest\nafflictions, when deep called to deep, and thy waves and billows were\npassing over me; when my soul seemed sinking in the mire where there\nwas no standing, I groped in the dark; my heart panted, my strength\nfailed, and the light of mine eyes seemed gone out. I was weak with my\ngroaning; in the night I made my bed to swim with my tears; yet even\nthen, by that same covenant by which I was suffering, light sprang out\nof darkness, glimmering hope in the midst of despair. I remembered the\nyears of thy right hand; in the multitude of my thoughts within\nme--the provision made in this covenant--thy comforts delighted\nmy soul.\n\n \"I was furnished with a plea which would condemn, by every\ncovenant but thine: Pardon my iniquities, for they are great. Thou,\neven thou, art he who blottest out transgressions as a cloud, and\niniquity as a thick cloud. Verily thou art a God that pardoneth,\nthough thou takest vengeance on the inventions of thy rebellious\nchildren. 'Vengeance!' not the vengeance of the curse; no, that, O\nthou blessed Covenant, thou blessed Surety, that fell on thy devoted\nhead. Thou by this covenant wast 'made a curse for us.' Thou didst\ntread the wine-press alone, and of the people there was none to help\nthee. Thou didst expend the last drop of that cup of vengeance. Every\ncup put into our hand, though a cup of trembling, is a cup of\nblessing. I this day take a fresh hold of thy covenant, for myself,\nfor my children, and for my children's children, to the latest\ngeneration. For my brother and sister, for their children, and\nchildren's children; for the near concerns of our dear D. B----; and\nfor all whom I carry on my mind to thy throne of grace. This is the\nsum and substance of my prayers. Bring them into the bond of this\ncovenant, and deal with them according to the order of it, and the\nprovision made for them in it, in all possible circumstances. Amen.\n\n \"O God, in the multitude of thy mercies hear me, in the truth of\nthy salvation. Truth of thy salvation! thou only knowest the truth of\nthy salvation. How little do we know of thy work. Many of those\nprovidences which appear to us dark and dismal, are wheels turning\nround 'the truth of thy salvation;' opening our blinded eyes to the\nissues of sin, and also delivering from the snares of the devil. Deal\nnot, O Lord, with me, and mine, as our iniquities deserve; this has\nnever been thy way with us; but according to thy former\nloving-kindness, and to all the long-suffering, patience, and\npardoning mercy which thy aged servant has experienced through her\nsinful guilty pilgrimage. Thou hast forgiven me all the way from\nEgypt. Leave me not now, when I am old and grey-headed; but when\nstrength and heart fail, be thou the strength of my heart and portion\nfor ever. Amen.\"\n\n\n The winter of 1804-5 was unusually severe: the river Hudson was\nshut by frost as early as November; fuel was consequently scarce and\ndear, and the poor suffered greatly. Mrs. Graham visited those parts\nof the city where the poorer class of sufferers dwelt;* in upwards of\ntwo hundred families she either found a Bible their property, or gave\nthem one; praying with them in their affliction. She requested a\nfriend to write, first one religious tract and then another, suited to\nthe peculiar situation of those afflicted people. One was called, \"A\nDonation to Poor Widows with Small Children;\" the other, \"A Second\nVisit to Poor Widows with Small Children.\" And lest it might be said\nit was cheap to give advice, she usually gave a small sum of money\nalong with the tracts she distributed. There was at this time neither\na Bible nor Tract Society in New York. Mrs. Hoffman accompanied her in\nmany of her excursions. In the course of their visits, they discovered\na French family from St. Domingo in such extremity of distress as made\nthem judge it necessary to report their case to the Honorable Dewitt\nClinton, then mayor of the city. The situation of this family being\nmade public, three hundred dollars were voluntarily contributed for\ntheir relief. Roused by this incident, a public meeting was called at\nthe Tontine Coffee-house, and committees from the different wards were\nappointed to aid the corporation in ascertaining and supplying the\nimmediate wants of the suffering poor. The zeal of Mrs. Graham and\nMrs. Hoffman paved the way for this public-spirited exertion, which\nprobably was the means of saving the lives of some of the destitute\nand friendless.\n\n*The following notice of these scenes appeared in one\n of the periodical publications of the day:\n\n \"When sorrow shrunk before the piercing wind,\n And famine, shelterless, in suffering pined;\n When sickness drooped in solitary pain,\n Mid varying misery's relentless reign;\n Oh, then tumultuous rose the plaints of grief,\n And loud and strong the clamors for relief!\n Then active charity, with boundless care,\n From gloomy faces chased the fiend Despair,\n Dispelled the horrors of the wintry day,\n And none that asked went unrelieved away.\n \"Yet there are some who sorrow's vigils keep,\n Unknown that languish, undistinguished weep;\n Behold yon ruined building's shattered walls,\n Where drifting snow through many a crevice falls;\n Whose smokeless vent no blazing fuel knows,\n But drear and cold the widow's mansion shows;\n Her fragile form, by sickness deeply riven,\n Too weak to face the driving blasts of heaven,\n Her voice too faint to reach some pitying ear,\n Her shivering babes command her anguished tear:\n Their feeble cries in vain assistance crave,\n And expectation 'points but to the grave.'\n \"But lo, with hasty step a female form\n Glides through the wind and braves the chilling storm,\n With eager hand now shakes the tottering door,\n Now rushes breathless o'er the snow-clad floor.\n Her tongue soft comfort to the mourner speaks,\n Her silver voice with soft emotion breaks;\n Round the drear hovel roves her moistened eye,\n Her graceful bosom heaves the lengthened sigh.\n \"I know thee now--I know that angel frame--\n O that the muse might dare to breathe thy name:\n Nor thine alone, but all that sister-band\n Who scatter gladness o'er a weeping land;\n Who comfort to the infant sufferer bring,\n And 'teach with joy the widow's heart to sing.'\n \"For this, no noisy honors fame shall give,\n In your own breasts your gentle virtues live;\n No sounding numbers shall your names reveal,\n But your own hearts the rich reward shall feel.\n \"ALBERT.\"\n\n\n In the month of August, 1805, Mrs. Graham paid another visit to\nher friends in Boston, of whom she spoke with much affection and\nesteem. She used to mention, with peculiar approbation, a society of\npious ladies there, who met once in every week for prayer and mutual\nedification.\n\n On returning to New York, she again wrote to her friend Mrs.\nC----, renewing her endeavors for her consolation and establishment in\nthe faith of Christ; and soon after informed her of the dangerous\nillness of two of her grandchildren, one of whom, in the righteous\ndispensations of an unerring Providence, was taken, and the\nother left.\n\n\n To Mrs. C----, Boston.\n\n \"GREENWICH, N.Y., Sept. 26, 1805.\n\n \"MY DEAR FRIEND--I arrived here on Monday. I found my children in\nhealth, but much affected with the death of the amiable youth M----,\nand the melancholy situation of his bereaved parents.\n\n \"The epidemic spreads over the city in every direction among the\nfew remaining in it. All the public offices are here; crowds of the\ncitizens, and houses and stores spring up in a day; all is bustle and\nconfusion, and all seem mad on business.\n\n \"Parting with my dear friend was most painful, so painful that\nnothing could alleviate it but the presence of my own children, who,\ncould there have been room from deeper sorrows, would have shared it\nwith me. O that I could put my God in my place in your heart. What are\nearthly friends? How few are steady against all change of\ncircumstances; of these, fewer still have it in their power to supply\nevery link of friendship's chain; a thousand unforeseen incidents\ndisappoint their wishes and frustrate their hopes, rendering abortive\ntheir greatest exertions. But there is a Friend, everywhere present,\nthoroughly acquainted with every circumstance of the heart and of the\nlife; all-powerful to relieve; whose love is invariable, and ever the\nmost tender when every other friend stands aloof; a friend in\nadversity, 'a friend who sticketh closer than a brother,' whose love\nsurpasseth the love of women. This Friend receiveth sinners--casts out\nnone who come to him. He was never known to disappoint the hopes of\nany poor sinner. He receives them into his heart; he takes all their\nburdens and cares on himself, pays all their debts, answers all\ndemands against them, and is every way surety for them; they become\nhis own, no one has any thing to say to them but himself. He knows\nthem--how apt to err, to wander, yea, to forget him, and prove\nungrateful; all this he knows, but he has made provision for all. He\nhas a rod, and he will subdue their iniquities. He will heal their\nbackslidings, he will bring back and restore his wanderers. He will in\ndue time perfect what concerns them, and present them to his Father\npurified, without spot or wrinkle.\n\n \"In the meantime he requires them to confide in him; to go up\nthrough this wilderness leaning upon him; to tell him all their\ncomplaints and griefs, and to comfort themselves: and he will impress\nthe comfort by means of his great and precious promises, scattered\nlike so many pearls through his sacred Bible, tabled there on purpose\nfor us to ground our prayers upon, and delight ourselves in. This is\nyour friend's Friend, and of ten thousand besides. This was the wicked\nMagdalene's Friend; this, the persecuting Paul's Friend, wicked\nManasseh's Friend; the adulterous, murdering David's Friend. And he is\nyour Friend, though your eyes are holden that you see him not. He is\nleading you by a way that you know not. This is one of his characters,\n'I will bring the blind by a way that they know not.'\n\n \"I was happy to find your niece was to return with Mr. C----;\nbut, my dear, a painful dread has assaulted my peace, lest Satan get\nthe advantage by means of a stranger in the family, and undo what has\nbeen begun. The world may have peace without God; but you shall not.\nYou have, however feebly, taken hold of his covenant, and he will keep\nyou to your choice. 'If his children forsake his laws and go astray,'\netc. Psalm 79:30.\"\n\n\n \"NOVEMBER, 1805.\n\n \"MY DEAR FRIEND--This is not our rest; through much tribulation\nall Christ's disciples must follow him. There is a rest prepared for\nthe people of God: as far as tasted in this world--and in this world\nit is tasted--it consists in a mind resigned to the will of God in\nproportion as it can say, 'Thy will be done on earth, as it is done in\nheaven.' Christ himself was made perfect through suffering, and all\nhis followers shall be so in their appointed measure. What is our cup\nto his? O my dear friend, we are ransomed, we are redeemed, and we are\nfitting and preparing for the purchased inheritance, that perfect rest\nprepared for the people of God when their warfare is finished. Let him\ndo all his pleasure with us here; let him subdue our iniquities in his\nown way; let him glorify his name by our sufferings--his glory is ever\nconnected with his people's best interests. We shall one day\nacknowledge that he has done all things well, and that not one word of\nall that he has promised has failed.\n\n \"It has pleased the Lord to take from us our dear sweet Rebecca;\nyoung as she was, through much tribulation she entered in: I have\nscarcely seen severer suffering, nor a harder dismission. It is well;\nthe Lord will answer his own ends by it for the good of all concerned,\nas well as for his own glory. Our dear G---- was ill at the same time,\nand all hope was lost as to him also; for a whole week we looked upon\nhim as dying, A bold measure was taken with him, which succeeded; the\nLord had commanded life; it was not thought of for her. God had\nappointed to her entrance into life eternal. It is all well. Blessed,\nblessed be his name; for her he has taken and him he has restored,\nboth equally. I.G. S---- was confined at the same time with a broken\narm; N. B---- with the fever and pleurisy. Deep have been the wounds in\nthis aged heart, not yet weaned from earth, but tremblingly alive to\nevery thing that concerns my children. Yet I do give up. I have asked\nbut one thing with importunity, and by that I abide. I did not ask for\ntemporal life, but the life which Christ died to purchase, and lives\nto bestow; let him answer my petition by means of his own appointing:\nby health or by sickness, by riches or by poverty, by long life or\nearly deaths--only let all mine by the ties of nature, be his by\nregeneration of his Spirit.\"\n\n\n Having felt the trials and the responsibilities of widowhood, she\nwrote to her brother's widow, Mrs. Marshall, in 1805:\n\n\n \"You are now, my dear sister, the only head of your family. Will\nyou take Joshua's determination? 'As for me and my house, we will\nserve the Lord.' Take hold of God's covenant for your orphan children\nas for yourself, and consider them as his, to be brought up for him.\nBe a priestess in your own house, and keep up the worship of God daily\nin your family, and confess your Lord and Master before angels, men,\nand devils. Those who thus honor God, he will honor.\n\n \"You are indeed, my dear, arrived at an important stage of your\njourney through this great wilderness. You are now the head of the\nfamily, and are to God immediately answerable. No earthly\nconsideration must make you give up the government of it, nor the\nprerogative which he hath given you, to counsel, and even beseech your\nhousehold to serve the Lord. You cannot give grace; you cannot give\nlife; and where there is no life there can be no spiritual exercise:\nbut you may use means, although there is much prudence to be observed\nto avoid disgust.\n\n \"Be faithful, then, my dear sister, to your important trust. See\nthat your household remember the Sabbath-day to keep it holy; your\nchildren, of course, will accompany you to the house of God, but let\nnot your servants absent themselves from his ordinances, and endeavor,\non your return home, to explain and bring home the word that may have\nbeen spoken to their consciences. Above all, let it be your constant\naim to set before them a godly, consistent example, and be much\nengaged in prayer for them--I mean for your servants as well as for\nyour children, and God will, in all probability, make you a mother in\nIsrael, the mother of many spiritual children, and turn your captivity\ninto rejoicing, and fill your mouth with songs of praise; or should\nyou not have this comfort, should the night of adversity last to the\nvery valley of the shadow of death, the morning of eternal rest shall\nthen beam forth upon your own soul, and your prayers may be answered\nfor others, when the eyes that wept and the breast that heaved are at\nrest in the dust. O, then, my sister, possess your soul in patience,\nand seek to make daily advances in holiness.\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER IX.\n\n ORPHAN ASYLUM SOCIETY--FOREIGN\n MISSIONARIES--LETTERS.\n\n\n On the 15th of March, 1806, the female subscribers to proposals\nfor providing an asylum for orphan children met at the City Hotel;\nMrs. Graham was called to the chair, a society organized, and a board\nof direction chosen, Mrs. Hoffman was elected the first directress of\nthe Orphan Asylum Society. Mrs. Graham continued in the office of\nfirst directress of the Widows' Society, but took a deep interest in\nthe success of the Orphan Asylum also; she, or one of her family,\ntaught the orphans daily, until the funds of the institution were\nsufficient to provide a teacher and superintendent. She was a trustee\nat the time of her decease. The wish to establish this new society was\noccasioned by the pain which it gave the ladies of the Widows' Society\nto behold a family of orphans driven, on the decease of a widow, to\nseek refuge in the almshouse; no melting heart to feel, no redeeming\nhand to rescue them from a situation so unpromising for mental and\nmoral improvement.\n\n \"Among the afflicted of our suffering race,\" thus speaks the\nconstitution of the society, \"none makes a stronger or more impressive\nappeal to humanity than the _destitute orphan_. Crime has not\nbeen the cause of its misery, and future usefulness may yet be the\nresult of its protection; the reverse is often the case of more aged\nobjects. God himself has marked the fatherless as the peculiar\nsubjects of his divine compassion. 'A Father of the fatherless is God\nin his holy habitation,' 'When my father and my mother forsake me,\nthen the Lord will take me up.' To be the blessed instrument of,\ndivine Providence in making good the promise of God, is a privilege\nequally desirable and honorable to the benevolent heart.'\"\n\n\n And truly God has made good his promise towards this benevolent\ninstitution. He has crowned the undertaking with his remarkable\nblessing. It was begun by his disciples in faith, and he has\nacknowledged them in it. Having for fourteen months occupied a hired\nhouse for an asylum, the ladies entertained the bold idea of building\nan asylum on account of the society. They had then about three hundred\nand fifty dollars as the commencement of a fund for the building; they\npurchased four lots of ground in the village of Greenwich, on a\nhealthful, elevated site, possessing a fine prospect. The corner-stone\nwas laid on the 7th of July, 1807. They erected a building fifty feet\nsquare; from time to time they proceeded to finish the interior of the\nbuilding, and to purchase additional ground as their funds would\npermit; and such was the liberality of the legislature and of the\npublic, that the society soon possessed a handsome building and nearly\nan acre of ground, all of which must have cost them little short of\ntwenty-five thousand dollars. In that house Mrs. Graham and Mrs.\nHoffman spent much of their time; there they trained for eternity the\nchildren of those whose widowed dying mothers they had cheered with\nthe hope that when they should be taken away, God would fulfil his\ngracious promise and preserve their fatherless children alive.\n\n Mrs. Hoffman survived Mrs. Graham seven years. Her end, like that\nof her friend, was peace. But though God removed those mothers in\nIsrael, their prayers are still before him, and the institution\ncontinues to prosper. In 1836, the city having extended to where the\nasylum was situated, and the property at the same time increased in\nvalue, the society became desirous to remove where the children would\nenjoy purer air, and have greater convenience for a garden and pasture\nfor cows. With the advice of their patrons, they sold the property for\nabout thirty-nine thousand dollars; purchased nearly ten acres of\nground at Bloomingdale, and on the 9th of June the same year laid the\nfoundation-stone of their present beautiful building.\n\n In the Thirty-fourth Annual Report of the society for 1840, we\nfind the following record of God's goodness:\n\n \"On no former occasion has the board of direction been privileged\nto make to the friends and patrons of this institution a more\nfavorable report than the present. The orphan's home is completed, and\nthe beautiful building on the banks of the Hudson is alike an ornament\nto the city and a memorial of the liberality of its inhabitants.\nWithin it are found, not only ample accommodations for a numerous\nfamily, but a place for the Lord, a habitation for the orphans' God.\nOn the 19th of November last the chapel was opened for religious\nworship; the services were performed by reverend clergy of different\ndenominations; and a highly respectable and apparently gratified\naudience attended. All the children, one hundred and sixty-five in\nnumber, were present, from the infant in arms to the youth who will\nthis day pronounce the valedictory.\n\n \"To those who have witnessed the progress of this institution\nfrom the _small frame-house_ of 1806 to the noble edifice of\n1840, accompanied by the recollection that the door has never been\nclosed against the destitute orphan, how deep must be the conviction\nof an overruling Providence--the truth of the declaration, that God is\nthe father of the fatherless in his holy habitation, and the\nfulfilment of his gracious promise, 'Leave thy fatherless children, I\nwill preserve them alive.' Nor is the orphan family merely furnished\nwith sufficient accommodation for dwelling and moral and religious\neducation: the grounds afford ample room for exercise and recreation;\nthe garden supplies them with fruit and vegetables; and there being\npasture for several cows, wholesome milk is added to their simple\nbreakfast, while the abounding river invigorates the frame by a saline\nbath, and by casting a net into it, furnishes an occasional dinner of\nfresh fish.\"\n\n The society, ever grateful to the founders, have erected a tablet\non the wall of the beautiful chapel, which bears the following\ninscription:\n\n\n SACRED TO THE MEMORY\n\n OF\n\n ISABELLA GRAHAM,\n WHO DIED 27TH JULY, 1814;\n\n AND OF\n\n MRS. SARAH HOFFMAN,\n WHO DIED 29TH JULY, 1821.\n\n THEY WERE BOTH FOUNDERS OF THIS INSTITUTION.\n\n TO THEIR PRAYER OF FAITH,\n AND WISDOM IN DIRECTING ITS COUNSELS,\n THE SOCIETY IS INDEBTED FOR MUCH OF THE SUCCESS THAT HAS\n ATTENDED IT.\n\n THEY WERE LOVELY IN THEIR LIVES,\n AND DURING MANY YEARS THEY TRAVELLED TOGETHER THE WALKS\n OF CHARITY.\n\n WHEN THE EAR HEARD THEM IT BLESSED THEM, AND THEY CAUSED THE\n WIDOW'S HEART TO SING FOR JOY.\n\n THEY NOW REST FROM THEIR LABORS,\n\n PARTAKERS OF THE BLESSEDNESS OF THOSE\n WHO DIE IN THE LORD:\n\n THEIR WORKS DO FOLLOW THEM.\n\n The success which has attended the Orphan Asylum Society,\nfurnishes strong encouragement to attempt great and good objects even\nwith slender means. God in his providence will command a blessing on\nexertions of this character. It is too common a mistake, and one fatal\nto the progress of improvement, that great means should be in actual\npossession before great objects should be attempted. Ah, were our\ndependence simply on apparent instruments, how small must be our hopes\nof success. There is a mystery, yet a certainty, in the manner by\nwhich God is pleased in his providence to conduct feeble means to a\nhappy conclusion. Has he not preserved, cherished, and blessed his\nchurch through many ages, amidst overwhelming persecutions, and that\noften by means apparently inadequate to this end? We must work for, as\nwell as pray for the blessing which God has promised to bestow on our\nsinful race. We must put our shoulder to the wheel, while we look up\nto heaven for assistance, and God will bless those who are found in\nthe path of duty.\n\n In this asylum, the ladies have set no limits to the number to be\nreceived; and it has pleased God also not to set limits to the means\nnecessary for their support. The institution is a great favorite with\nthe public, and is frequently visited by strangers, who are delighted\nwith the cleanliness, health, and cheerful countenances of the\norphans.\n\n The Society have received a charter of incorporation from the\nlegislature; they have a handsome seal, with this inscription:\n\"Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, ye have\ndone it unto me.\"\n\n For several years it was customary with Mrs. Graham to visit the\nNew York hospital; and before the admirable provision since made for\nthe separate care of those mentally deranged, she paid a particular\nattention to patients of this description.\n\n To the apartments appropriated to sick female convicts in the\nstate prison, she also made many visits; she met with some affecting\ncircumstances among this class.\n\n In the winter of 1807-8, when the suspension of commerce by the\nembargo rendered the situation of the poor more destitute than ever,\nMrs. Graham adopted a plan best calculated in her view to detect the\nidle applicant for charity, and at the same time to furnish employment\nfor the more worthy among the female poor. She purchased flax, and\nlent wheels where applicants had none. Such as were industrious, took\nthe work with thankfulness and were paid for it; those who were\nbeggars by profession never kept their word by returning for the flax\nor the wheel. The flax thus spun was afterwards wove, bleached, and\nmade into table-cloths and towels for family use.\n\n Mrs. Graham used to remark, that until some institution should be\nformed to furnish employment for industrious poor women, the work of\ncharity would be incomplete. It was about this time that, deeming the\nduties too laborious for her health, she resigned the office of first\ndirectress of the Widows' Society, and took the place of a manager.\nShe afterwards declined this also, and became a trustee of the Orphan\nAsylum Society, as more suited to her advanced period of life.\n\n The lady to whom the following letter was addressed was Miss\nFARQUHARSON, a person of genuine piety and worth, whom Mrs. Graham had\neducated and prepared to become her assistant in teaching. When Mrs.\nGraham retired from her school, Miss Farquharson declined to succeed\nher, preferring to accompany and enjoy the society of her patroness\nand friend. Until 1804 she proved as efficient an assistant to Mrs.\nGraham in her charitable labors in the Widows' Society and\nSabbath-school, as she had been in her boarding-school.\n\n During the prevalence of the yellow-fever in 1804, she was called\nto attend her own dying mother, and underwent so much fatigue, that on\nher return to Mrs. Graham she broke a bloodvessel, and for four months\nwas confined to her room, during all which time Mrs. Graham attended\nher night and day. Her medical attendants prescribed a long voyage and\nresidence in a hot climate as the only means of saving her life. About\nthat time Mr. Andrew Smith was preparing to sail for the East Indies\nwith his family, by the way of England. With them she embarked. She\nsojourned several weeks in Birmingham, and there the circumstances\ncommenced which eventually led Miss Farquharson to become a\nmissionary's wife, and the first American missionary to foreign lands.\nHer history has been published by Rev. Mr. Knill, in a tract entitled,\n\"The Missionary's Wife.\"\n\n The London Missionary Society were preparing to establish a\nmission in the idolatrous city of Surat, but the East India Company\nwould not allow Christian missionaries to sail in their ships. The\nSociety thankfully availed themselves of the privilege of sending Mr.\nLoveless and Dr. Taylor in the American ship Alleghany. They arrived\nin Madras, June, 1805.\n\n During the voyage an attachment was formed between Mr. Loveless\nand Miss Farquharson which death only could sever, and introduced her\nto scenes of usefulness for more than thirty years, for which she was\neminently qualified by early training. As soon as Mrs. Graham heard\nhow her friend was going to be employed, she wrote to her as follows:\n\n\n \"MY DEAR SALLY--Many tears have I shed over your letter. What a\nchanging lot has been that of my family! The Lord's providences to me\nand mine have not been of the ordinary kind, and you, as one in it,\nseem to be a partaker with us. Surely, of all others, we have most\nreason to say, We are strangers and pilgrims on the earth. Oh that we\nmay drink into the true spirit of that phrase, and enjoy the genuine,\nfirm faith of an everlasting habitation, of living at home with God.\n\n \"My dear Sally, take the comfort of this, that it is the Lord who\nhath led you all the way by which you have gone. Of all persons whom I\nknow, you were, from your temper and disposition, the least likely to\ntravel, still less to continue a traveller. No ordinary means would\nhave led you to leave your friends and religious privileges. And many\na pang it has cost me, on reflection, to think how positive I was that\nyou should take the voyage. But it was of the Lord. The physicians\nurged it as the only chance you had for life, and they had reason; for\nof all those who were attacked in the same manner, there is not one\nalive, within my knowledge, at this day.\n\n \"The Lord, by wonderful means, called you from your native land,\nand led you to the very spot where you met Mr. Loveless. The same God,\nbeing also his God, led him, by means perhaps equally unforeseen and\nuncommon, to the same spot, united your hearts to each other, and made\nyou one in his hand, and I trust to his glory. You ask my blessing: I\nhave carried both of you to my God and Saviour, and have prayed, and\ncontinue to pray, that the Lord will bless you individually and\nunitedly, give you much sweet communion with himself, and much social\nenjoyment with him and with one another. May he bless Mr. Loveless as\na missionary, and give him the spirit of his office, and much fruit\namong the heathen, as seals to his ministry; and may you be a helper\nwith him, and both be blessed and made a blessing.\n\n \"I feel my loss. You were a comfort and a help to us all,\nespecially to me: but I do not mourn; I heartily acquiesce. This is\nnot only agreeable to me, as it is one of God's wise arrangements to\nyou and us all, but I think it will be more to your comfort. Religion\nand conjugal love will sweeten almost any lot. It is the Lord's\nappointment and his richest earthly blessing.\n\n \"My dear Sally, I have ever considered you as my child. You are\nvery dear to my heart. Tell Mr. Loveless he must ever consider me as\nhis mother.\n\n \"Your affectionate mother,\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n In the month of January, 1807, the London Missionary Society, of\nwhich Mr. Bethune was a foreign director, sent to this country the\nRev. Messrs. Gordon, Lee, and Morrison; the two first to sail in an\nAmerican ship for the East Indies, and Mr. Morrison for China. These\ndevoted missionaries shared largely in the hospitalities of Christians\nin New York, and spent much of their time with Mr. Bethune's family.\nMrs. Graham took great delight in conversing and advising with them,\nand though none of her letters addressed to them have come to hand, it\nis believed she corresponded with them. The following extract of a\nletter from Dr. Morrison, indicates the respect and Christian\naffection with which he regarded her.\n\n\n \"ON BOARD THE TRIDENT, May 24, 1807.\n\n \"MY EVER DEAR MOTHER GRAHAM--I think you were led by the special\ninterference of our gracious Lord, to put into my hands the work which\nyou did, accompanied by the edifying and comforting letter which you\nwrote me.\n\n \"I thank you for telling me what God did for your soul, and join\nwith you in ascribing to the Lord salvation and honor. I had, my\nmother, from the time of leaving my dear relations and friends, passed\nthrough waters deep as the fathomless ocean which I crossed; but with\nthe Lord there is mercy; with him is 'plenteous redemption.' He is\nready to forgive. He has restored to me, in some measure, 'the joy of\nhis salvation,' and will not, I trust, take his Holy Spirit from me.\nThis is my prayer. To-day he enabled me, on board of this vessel, to\nopen my lips to teach transgressors his way. O, that sinners may be\nconverted unto him.\"\n\n\n To Mr. and Mrs. B----, at Ballston Springs.\n\n \"NEW YORK, August, 1807.\n\n \"MY BELOVED CHILDREN--A husband, wife, and child, make a family,\nand God ought to be acknowledged by them as such. I am anxious that\nyou should meet in your room for that purpose some time every morning.\n\n \"If it cannot be accomplished at an early hour, redeem that time\nin a later, and also before going to rest in the evening. The Lord has\nhonored your family worship with genuine fruits, follow it up in all\nplaces. Like Abraham of old, wherever you pitch your tent, for a\nlonger or shorter period, there raise an altar to the Lord, to that\nGod who has fed you all your life, carried you as on eagle's wings,\nand will carry you to old age and gray hairs.\"\n\n\n To Mrs. Juliet S----, New York, one of her former pupils.\n\n \"BELLEVILLE, September 16, 1808.\n\n \"MY DEAR JULIET--Since the hour I received your letter, you have\nbeen little out of my mind. You call upon me as mother, friend,\ncounsellor. Shall conscious unworthiness, or weakness, or ignorance,\nprevent my answering? No; for God often chooses weak instruments to\nbring to pass great ends, I have been once and again to a throne of\ngrace, for wisdom to direct me, and grace to be faithful. If your\ndesire after spiritual knowledge be sincere, and from the Spirit of\nGod operating on your heart, you will bear searching.\n\n \"You are a communicant, my Juliet; this presupposes that a very\ngreat and important change has taken place in your mind--that you have\nbeen made deeply sensible of what the word of God testifies of every\nson and daughter of Adam's race. 'As it is written, There is none\nrighteous, no, not one.' Rom. 3:10. Man is born as the wild ass's\ncolt, going astray from the womb. Job. The heart is deceitful above\nall things, and desperately wicked; I the Lord search it. Having the\nunderstanding darkened, alienated from the life of God, through the\nignorance that is in us, because of the blindness of our hearts. Dead\nin trespasses and sins. Eph. 4:18; 2:1.\n\n \"Your profession presupposes that this chapter may be addressed\nto you, Juliet, by name: 'You hath he quickened, who were dead in\ntrespasses and sins; wherein in time past ye walked according to the\ncourse of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air,\nthe spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience: among\nwhom also we all had our conversation in times past, in the lusts of\nour flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and\nwere by nature the children of wrath, even as others. But God, who is\nrich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, even when we\nwere dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ; by grace\nare ye saved, through faith, not of works, lest any man should boast.'\nWorks there are, my Juliet, most assuredly; every quickened soul will\nlive, and bring forth fruits of righteousness; but these works are not\nattainable but in God's way and order. It follows, 'For we are his\nworkmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath\nbefore ordained that we should walk in them.'\n\n \"My Juliet says, 'To you then I look up to teach me.' Let me then\nbring you to the great Teacher and Prophet of the church, without\nwhose teaching all human instruction will be ineffectual. We read of\ntwo amiable characters coming to Christ professedly for instruction.\nThe first you will find in Matthew 19:16. The young man asks him,\n'What good thing shall I do, that I may inherit eternal life?' Jesus\nanswers him by referring him to the moral law: the young man, not made\nacquainted by the Spirit of God, either with the extent or\nspirituality of that law, or of the depravity of his own nature,\nanswers, as many in like circumstances still do,' All these things\nhave I kept from my youth up.' I do not suppose any one could\ncontradict him. It is added that Jesus loved him, and he was a person\nof attractive character; but Jesus knew that the true principle was\nnot there--supreme love to God, 'with all the heart, with all the\nsoul, with all the strength, and with all the mind:' therefore he gave\nhim a test which proved that the world was uppermost in his heart. He\nwent away sorrowful, and we hear no more of him.\n\n \"Of the other person we read in that remarkable chapter, the\nthird of John's gospel--Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews, and also a\nteacher. Well knew he the law, as to the letter of it, both moral and\nceremonial; he must also have been acquainted with all the Old\nTestament scripture types and prophecies, it being his office to\nexpound; and no doubt, among others, was looking for the promised\nMessiah. Jesus does not send him to either the law or the prophets.\nThis ruler comes with a conviction and an acknowledgment that Jesus\nhimself was a teacher immediately from God; and Jesus immediately\ntakes upon himself his great office, and begins with urging that which\nis a sinner's first business--'to know himself,' what he is by nature,\nand the necessity of the new birth. Nicodemus, with all his learning,\nwas a stranger to this doctrine: 'How can a man be born when he is\nold?' Jesus repeats his doctrine, 'He must be born of water and the\nSpirit;' baptized with water and the Holy Ghost. 'That which is born\nof the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.\nMarvel not that I said unto you, Ye must be born again.' Humble that\nproud reason that will believe nothing but what it can understand.\n'The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound\nthereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh or whither it goeth; so\nis every one that is born of the Spirit.' A mystery it is;\nnevertheless it is true.\n\n \"Follow out the chapter, my dear: Jesus preaches his own gospel,\nand brings in that beautiful type, the serpent, which he had commanded\nto be raised on a pole, that those who had been bitten with fiery\nserpents, whose bite was death, should look upon it and be healed.\nRead it, my dear, in the 21st of Numbers; and in reference to this, he\nhimself says, 'Look unto me, and be ye saved, all the ends of the\nearth.' Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.\nQuickened, renewed in the spirit, of his mind, old things pass away\nand all things become new--new principles, new desires, new pleasures,\nnew ends. The work is God's. The whole plan of redemption is his from\nfirst to last. It is clearly revealed in Scripture, and there is no\ndispute among Christians concerning it. The fall of man, his\ncorruption and depravity; his state under the curse of a broken\ncovenant, and his exposure to eternal misery; his helplessness and\ntotal inability to gain acceptance with God; his ignorance of\nhimself--'dead in trespasses and sins,' 'without God and without hope\nin the world:' this is his situation by nature. But there is good news\nproclaimed: 'God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten\nSon,' to become the surety of lost sinners. He took our nature upon\nhim, our sins upon him, our duties upon him: he was placed in our\nstead; sustained the penalty of the broken law; fulfilled its utmost\ndemands; redeemed us; gave us a new covenant, of which himself\nis the surety: and there is 'no condemnation to them that are in\nChrist Jesus.'\n\n \"The merits of Christ, exclusive of any thing of ours, are the\nsole foundation of our hope. Christ is set forth, in Scripture, as the\natonement, the propitiation for sins, the one sacrifice for sin;\nChrist is the end of the law for righteousness; all is made ours by\nfree gift. 1 John, 5:11. All is ready, justice satisfied, God\nreconciled, peace proclaimed. But what is all this to a thoughtless\nworld, insensible of their situation, danger, and need? It is an awful\nsaying, but it is of the Holy Ghost, If our gospel be hid, it is hid\nto them that are lost, in whom the god of this world hath blinded\ntheir minds, and darkened their understandings, and hardened their\nhearts, etc. Therefore the application of this grace is also of God;\nit is all within his plan; he has appointed means, and commanded our\ndiligence in the use of them. We have his Bible in our hands, his\nministers in our churches, who are also pastors and teachers if we\napply for their aid in private; we have a throne of grace to go to,\nand many great and precious promises held up in God's word for us to\nembrace and plead for Christ's sake: we have many prayers in the\nScriptures which we may adopt.\n\n \"I acknowledge we are all still dependent for the effect; that\nmust be from God himself. But he does honor his own ordinances. He\nputs forth his power, and convinces of sin; this is his first work.\nThe soul is awakened, aroused, convinced of sin and misery; sins of\nthe heart, sins of the tongue, sins of the life, press upon the\nconscience which never disturbed us before; misspent time, wasted\ntalents, lost opportunities, neglect of God's word and ordinances, so\nthat the soul cannot rest. O, my Juliet, this is a hopeful case. I\nhope you have experienced something of this. It is one of the surest\nmarks of the operation of the Spirit of God, and a prelude to the new\nbirth. It never takes place without it, for the whole need not a\nphysician, but they that are sick. Only the weary and heavy laden will\nprize rest, and Christ is the rest they need; only a convinced sinner\nwill or can prize the Saviour, and now the Lord opens his mind to\nunderstand the Scriptures. He sees the provision which God has made\nfor ruined sinners, by providing a substitute to stand in his room; he\nperceives how God can be just and justify the sinner who takes shelter\nin Jesus; he falls in with God's gracious plan: receives the Lord\nJesus as God's gift to sinners; trusts entirely in his merits for\npardon, peace, reconciliation, and eternal life; resigns his soul into\nthe hands of his Saviour, in the faith that he will save it, and\ndevotes himself unreservedly to his service, in the faith that he will\ngive him grace to live to him in all holy obedience. Now, and not till\nnow, according to God's promise, he receives power to become his\nchild; this is God's order, John 1:12. Now he receives life and begins\nto live; but there is yet a great work before him. It hath pleased God\nin his plan to finish at once a justifying righteousness; it is his\nown work, and was finished in that awful hour when he announced it in\nhis last words on the cross. John 19:30. To this nothing of ours is to\nbe added, with this nothing of ours mixed; it is for ever perfect, it\nis God's gift made ours in the hour when we first believe, receive it,\nrest our souls upon it.\n\n \"But it hath not pleased God in this plan to deliver the believer\nat once from indwelling sin. This is the subject of the Christian\nwarfare, the race, the good fight. Now the believer receives life, and\nis called to work. 'Work out your own salvation with fear and\ntrembling, for it is God that worketh in you both to will and to do.'\nAll the promises in this blessed Bible are his, they are yea and amen\nin Christ; Christ himself is his; his Spirit dwells in him. The\nbeliever is united to Jesus by as real a union as the branch to the\nvine, the members to the head, the building with the foundation. Yet\nsin dwelleth in him, and is to be expunged by constant applications to\nChrist in prayer; by means of watching, striving, fighting--fighting\nunder his banner. In his blessed word we are informed where our\nstrength lies, what our weapons, what our armor. But what can I say on\nthose subjects? the whole word of God is on the subject of redemption;\nto this refer the whole labors of Christ's ministers, and the whole\ndispensation of God's providence.\n\n \"Are these things so? My Juliet, this is not the doctrine of any\none church. About these subjects there is no dispute. Presbyterians,\nEpiscopalians, Baptists, Independents, all agree in these great\nthings. And are these things so indeed? O, my Juliet, where is the\ntime to be spared for plays, assemblies, and such numerous idle\nparties of various descriptions? I must stop; the subject is great,\nand we have many excellent treatises on the various parts of it, by\nable, pious men. It would be improper to crowd it thus into a letter,\nunless to instigate to further investigation.\n\n \"Farewell; I ever am, my dear Juliet,\n\n \"Yours affectionately,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n The delicate state of health to which one of her granddaughters\nwas reduced in 1808, made it necessary for her to spend the summer\nseason for five successive years at Rockaway, Long Island, for the\nadvantage of sea-bathing. Mrs. Graham went with her, it being\nbeneficial to her own health also. In this place she met with many\nstrangers; the company residing there treated her with much affection\nand respect. She always attended to the worship of God morning and\nevening in her room, and was usually accompanied by some of the ladies\nwho boarded in the house. Her fund of information, vivacity of manner,\nand the interest which she felt in the happiness of all around her,\nmade her society highly valued and pleasing. Few of those ladies who\nstayed with her at Rockaway for any length of time, failed to express,\nat parting, their esteem for her, and they generally added a pressing\ninvitation for a visit from her, if ever she should travel near where\nthey dwelt.\n\n\n The following is one of her sweet meditations while at Rockaway:\n\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, August, 1809.\n\n \"Sweet health again returns, which, considering the agitation of\nmy mind, surprises me; but it is the Lord's pleasure. I did not wish\nto recover. I was in hopes the Lord was about to deliver me from 'this\nbody of sin and death.' Lord, reconcile me to thy most holy will.\nHealth is certainly a great blessing. I feel its sweetness. O make me\nthankful. Great and numerous are my mercies. Every thing pleasant and\nevery thing necessary to life, to godliness, is mine: food and raiment\nto the utmost desires of nature; the beauties of thy fair creation\nsurround my ordinary dwelling; my dear little room, my Bible, and\nbooks of every virtuous kind--by grace, thy chief mercy, I desire no\nother--and by the kindness of my children, I possess all as if they\nwere my own personal property. By thy wonderful loving-kindness, thou\nhast given me, instead of the contempt which I have merited, the love\nand esteem of thy people, and thou hast made the very stones of\nthe field to be at peace with me, so that wherever I go I meet\nwith kindness.\"\n\n\n To Mrs. Marshall.\n\n \"NEW YORK, October, 1809.\n\n \"I find your letter dated 'Elderslie'--the very name gives a\nthrill to my old heart; in a moment the various scenes of my youthful\ndays rise before me--the old mansion itself, and all its beloved\ninmates, every one of whom have now crossed the Jordan of death,\nleaving me a solitary wanderer in this weary wilderness. Ah, I can at\nthis moment think of spots, by the burnside and the braeside, endeared\nto my heart by a thousand tender associations. There have I wandered\nwith my beloved, idolized husband, and there has he delighted my heart\nwith professions of love. These were indeed moments of ecstasy; but\nhush, there are you a widow with very, very different sensations, and\nhere am I a widow with sensations equally different. The Lord has\nshowed us many and sore adversities, but he will bring us up from the\ndeeps below; we are much nearer our Father's house, and I hope\nproportionably riper for those joys which are at his right hand; and\nalthough your letter has brought some pleasing recollections to my\nmind--days of love and courtship, days, some of solitude, some of\ndisappointment, some of ecstasy--yet I find they were all days of\nidolatry, therefore to be mourned over, not retasted, reenjoyed with\ndelight. No, no; Father, forgive me.\"\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER X.\n\n NEW YORK BIBLE SOCIETY--ASSOCIATIONS FOR\n PRAYER--HAPPY OLD AGE--LETTERS.\n\n \"In December, 1809, a Bible Society was organized in New York,\nand about the same time twenty respectable persons united in a\nsociety, to wait on the Lord, to know what their hands could find to\ndo to promote his glory, to advance his kingdom, to spread the savor\nof the Redeemer's name, or in any way to benefit the souls of their\nfellow-sinners.\n\n \"On Monday a meeting for prayer was instituted in Hetty-street,\nand another in Mulberry-street, with which the Presbyterian ministers\nhave agreed to meet in rotation. It is the Lord. We have heard of\nrevivals all around, but feared lest the aggravated sins of New York\nmight provoke the Lord to pass by, leaving our fleece dry, while the\ndew wet all around. Great have been our privileges; the gospel trumpet\nhas sounded in every corner of our city. The Lord's servants have set\nbefore us life and death, assuring us, from God's word, that 'though\nhand join in hand, the wicked shall not go unpunished;' beseeching us\nto flee from the wrath to come, and lay hold on the hope set before\nus. God in his providence has visited us with mercies and with\njudgments: stricken us, and healed us; scattered us, and gathered us:\nbut alas, alas, we were 'eating and drinking, marrying and giving in\nmarriage.' Many, very many, wasting their time, health, and substance,\nin all manner of immorality, and our rulers caring for none of these\nthings; yea, many of them practising the same things; and Oh, God's\nown saved people sitting still, restraining testimony before men and\nprayer before God. What were we to expect but that God should say, Why\nshould they be stricken any more? they will revolt more and more: they\nare joined to idols; let them alone. Such, O Lord, would be the case\ndidst thou not deliver us out of our own self-destroying snares. If\nthou turn us not, we shall never turn; it is in our nature to\nbackslide for ever.\n\n \"But is not the time come to pass when before thy people call\nthou answerest, and while they are yet speaking, thou hearest? Art\nthou not calling with power, 'Return, ye backsliding children, and I\nwill heal your backslidings?' and hast thou not prepared their hearts\nto answer, Behold, we come unto thee, for thou art the Lord our God?\ntruly, in vain is salvation looked for from the hills, and from the\nmultitude of mountains; truly, from the Lord our God is the salvation\nof Israel. Hast thou not, O God, prepared the hearts of thy people to\npray, and thine ear to hear? Is not this Bible Society, and are not\nthese associations for prayer, tokens from thee for good? More and\nmore, Lord, may thy people give thee no rest, until thou make Zion a\npraise in the earth. O the Hope of Israel, and the Saviour thereof, be\nnot as a wayfaring man, that turneth aside for a night. May thy people\nconstrain thee to abide with us for ever, to form us a people for\nthyself, to show forth thy praise.\n\n \"I have just conveyed dear Mrs. A----le to the confines of the\neternal world. I trust the dear Redeemer received her spirit. I have a\ngood hope that she is now in possession of the mansion purchased and\nprepared for her by that dear Saviour whose name she professed, and I\nthink, in an humble, steady, quiet way, faithfully followed. She loved\nthe word of God, the house of God, the people of God. She spoke\nlittle, but said she had a good hope: asked me to read the Bible\ndifferent times, and also to pray; said the invitations of the gospel\nwere sweet to her: observed that the Lord had been very merciful to\nher in her affliction.\n\n \"A few hours before her death she desired me to read that hymn,\n\n \"'To him that loved the souls of men,' etc,\n\nAlso,\n\n \"'Come, let us join our cheerful songs,' etc.\n\nShe asked if I thought she would continue long. I said, No, my\ndear, you will very soon be with Jesus; and encouraged her as the Lord\nenabled me. She repeated the question some time after, and I gave her\nthe same answer. She then said, 'This night?' I answered, Yes, my\nlove, this night. She bowed her head with a sweet smile, laid it in a\nreclining posture, and set herself to wait with patience the Lord's\ntime. She was very much oppressed, and breathed with much difficulty.\nSome time after she asked me to pray, which I did, and begged that the\nLord would increase her faith and patience, and, if according to his\nwill, give her a gentle passage and an abundant entrance. In a short\ntime her breathing became short and low; she shut her eyes and gently\nbreathed weaker and weaker, till her God delivered her without motion\nor groan. I was on my knees praying. I then thanked God for his\ngoodness in this sweet dismission; prayed for the husband, the\nchildren, the two young men present, and us all, gave glory to God,\nand rose to watch to future duty.\n\n \"O my God, is not my own death at hand? It is a hard battle. My\nJesus, thou knowest the struggle. I too must drink of this cup; mix it\nfor me, my Redeemer. O let a full sense of free pardon, the\nrecollection of the great and precious promises, a bright view of the\njoys at God's right hand, as the fruit of thy death, be applied to my\nsoul in that awful hour. Holy Spirit, pour in the oil and wine of thy\nconsolations in that trying hour. O let me not be straitened. Open\nwide to my soul the leaves of that well-ordered covenant, of which\nChrist himself is the sum and substance. Redeeming God, may I\nexperience proof in that solemn hour, that 'thy flesh is meat indeed,\nand thy blood is drink indeed.' O feed me with this living food; may I\nfeel life spring up in my soul, and be assured that I shall 'never\ndie.' O my God, grant one more request. Open my lips, and let them, as\nwell as my heart, be filled with the high praises of my redeeming God.\n\n \"I know I am unworthy; the vilest of the vile; but magnify thy\ngrace. I have much forgiven; O let my heart burn with love and\ngratitude in that hour, and my lips utter its effusions in songs of\npraise. Amen.\n\n \"When the short thick breathing comes, and the slow fetches,\nsealing up speech and expelling the spirit from its abode, O let me\nhear or understand thee saying unto me, 'It is I, be not afraid.'\"\n\n\n \"JANUARY, 1810.\n\n \"'Come and let us return unto the Lord, for he hath torn, and he\nwill heal us; he hath smitten, and he will bind us up. After two days\nwill he revive us, in the third day he will raise us up, and we shall\nlive in his sight.'\n\n \"O Lord, turn us and we shall be turned, draw us and we will run\nafter thee. Revive us, and we shall live in thy sight. Thou must ever\nbe first. It is in our nature to backslide for ever: and whenever we\nsee a backslider restored, or a rebel lay down the weapons of\nrebellion, _there_ we may trace thy footsteps, O God of grace.\n\n \"No external providence will touch our hard, our deceitful\nhearts. All that goes under the name of misfortune will but drive us\n_from_ thee, never _to_ thee, till thou teach us to profit,\nand lead us by the way that we should go. Thou callest, 'Return, ye\nbacksliding children, and I will heal your backslidings;' but we have\nbeen foolish, sottish children, without understanding, wise to do\nevil, but to do good having no knowledge.\n\n \"Let the days come when the children of America--the earth is the\nLord's--shall 'come with weeping, and seek the Lord their God;' when\n'they shall ask the way to Zion, with their faces thitherward;' when\nthey shall come, saying, 'Let us join ourselves to the Lord in a\nperpetual covenant, never to be forgotten.' O the Hope of Israel and\nSaviour thereof, is not that day and that time come? Hast thou not\nbeen working on the right hand and on the left? Thou hast given us\npastors according to thine own heart, who feed us with knowledge and\nunderstanding: and thou art here and there proving thy gospel thy\npower and thy wisdom, to the salvation of sinners; casting down the\nimaginations of pride, and bringing all into subjection to thy Son\nJesus.\n\n \"O pour out the spirit of grace and supplication, upon thy living\nmembers, that they may wrestle with thee, and not let thee go until\nthou bless us, until thou make this 'cloud like a man's hand' cover\nour heavens with blackness, and issue in a plentiful rain. O pour\nwater upon him that is thirsty, and floods on the dry ground; thy\nSpirit upon our seed, and thy blessing upon our offspring. O Lord,\nhast thou not said that thou wilt do it, and that they shall spring up\nas among the grass, and as willows by the water-courses. One shall\nsay, I am the Lord's, another shall call himself by the name of Jacob,\nand another shall subscribe with his hand unto the Lord, and surname\nhimself by the name of Israel. Amen, O our God, Amen.\n\n \"Last week the Lord's young servant, Mr. R----, received to the\ncommunion of the church seven adults, Mrs. B---- and her two\ndaughters, Dr. H---- and sister, Mr. C----, and a black woman, servant\nto Mr. H----. It was a glorious sight, and revived the hearts of God's\npeople who witnessed it. O God of grace, grant that the fruits of\nrighteousness may prove that they are broken off from the wild\nolive-tree, and grafted into thee, thou living and life-giving\nolive-tree; from thee must their fruit be found. O cause them to bring\nforth much fruit. Herein is the Father glorified, that they bear much\nfruit; so shall they be Christ's disciples, and attain to the\nassurance of that happy state. Father, glorify thy name. Amen.\"\n\n\n In the year 1810, while bathing at Rockaway, she was carried by\nthe surf beyond her depth, and for some time there was scarcely a hope\nof her regaining the shore. Her grandchildren were weeping on the\nbeach, and the company assembled there were afflicted but hopeless\nspectators of her danger. At that moment of peril she prayed to the\nLord for deliverance, but acquiesced in his will, if he should see fit\nto take her to himself in this manner. Able to swim a little, she kept\nherself afloat for some time: she became at length very faint; and\nwhen her friends on the beach apprehended her lost, they perceived\nthat the waves had impelled her somewhat nearer to them. A gentleman\npresent, and her female attendant, stepped into the surf and extending\ntheir arms for mutual support, one of them was enabled to lay hold on\nMrs. Graham's bathing-gown and to pull her towards them. When they\nbrought her ashore she was much exhausted, and had swallowed a\nconsiderable quantity of water. It was some hours before she revived,\nwhen she addressed the company in a very serious and impressive manner\nthat affected them to tears. Her health during the following winter\nwas much impaired by the shock it had received.\n\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, June 15, 1810.\n\n \"Came here the first of the month, with the children in the\nwhooping-cough. No 'church-going bell' here, but the Lord is\neverywhere; and I have found him here, warming my heart with gratitude\nand contrition, and drawing it out in prayer for his people met to\nworship in his sanctuary.\n\n \"When at a distance from my own people, it has been my practice\nto join with whatever class of professing Christians might be near me.\nHere it has been with the Methodists, who, I believe, enjoy communion\nwith God. Yesterday I went to a meeting of ----, who lay great stress\non good morals; but, O my God, what could I do, shut up with them?\nWithout the finished work of my Saviour, I could have no hope; without\nhis law-fulfilling righteousness, I must stand a law-condemned sinner.\n\n \"The preacher yesterday took no text; in the course of his sermon\nhe said the Scriptures were only secondary guides. He began with the\nimportance of thinking of death, and said it could not be possible for\na rational being to live carelessly, with thoughts of death and\neternity in view. Is it so? No; we see sinners die, under the full\nconviction that they are dying, as thoughtless as they have lived.\n\n \"He said, that by constantly attending to the motions of the\nSpirit and complying with them, Christians arrived at a state of\nperfection even here; and brought in that text, 'He that is born of\nGod cannot sin,' etc. Spoke highly of watchfulness, and avoiding\nconnection with the world; said a real Christian could not hold any\noffice of power among men. Paul held one, but he gave it up when he\nbecame an apostle. Christ's kingdom was not of this world. Laws and\nofficers were necessary among the men of the world, but not among\nChristians. Spoke of the cross of Christ as consisting in suffering\nand self-denial. His blood was the Spirit which cleansed from all sin,\nby delivering all who obeyed him from its power. He named not my\nblessed Saviour, except when he had occasion to mention some of his\nmoral sayings. He said, indeed, that he was the Light that lightened\nevery man that came into the world, and the condemnation was that men\nwould not receive it; but one word of his blessed priesthood he spoke\nnot, but said we were in a state of probation, and every one would be\njudged according to his works, taking into view the advantages he had\nenjoyed; recommended the reading of the Scriptures, especially the\ninspired books, the New Testament and the prophets; for it needed no\ninspiration to write the national history of the Jews more than that\nof any other nation. Said the Scriptures were good secondary guides,\nand contained excellent lessons and truths.\n\n \"When I was coming away he offered me his hand, saying that I was\nnot a resident there. I answered no, I was separated from my own\npeople, but wished to unite with any class of Christians who met\nprofessedly to worship God; but confessed I could not live upon what\nhe had this day delivered. He asked what was wrong. I answered, he had\ngiven some good exhortations; I agreed with him in many things\nrespecting conduct; but I missed the foundation. He repeated the\nscriptures, 'Other foundation can no man lay,' etc. I said, Exactly:\noff this foundation there is no salvation; on this foundation there\nmay be loss, but no condemnation. We have a great and merciful\nHigh-priest, who can have compassion on the ignorant, and them who are\nout of the way; and there may be straw, hay, stubble, which will be\nburnt up, but the soul itself, being on the foundation, is safe. He\nsaid with firmness, That will be burnt up in this world; without\nholiness no man shall see the Lord. I said, True; but why avoid the\ntenor of Scripture? read all the epistles; the Lord Jesus Christ, the\ngift of God, the propitiatory sacrifice, the meritorious\nlaw-fulfilling righteousness, is set forth, in every one of them, as\nthat which saves from wrath and entitles to eternal life. He said they\nwere all emblems of our being made holy in heart and life; Christians\nwere baptized unto the death of Christ, and rise with him to newness\nof life, buried with him, etc. I granted that as one reading of these\nwords. He said every other view was shadow. I said, No--the blood of\nbulls and goats is shadow; Christ himself, his person, his offices,\nhis life, his sufferings, his death, his burial, resurrection,\nascension, and intercession within the veil, are all substance--the\nsole foundation of my hope, and my only plea at a throne of grace.\n\n \"Dear Name, the rock on which I build,\n My shield and hiding-place,\n My never-failing treasury, filled\n With boundless stores of grace.\n\n Jesus, my Husband, Shepherd, Friend,\n My Prophet, Priest, and King,\n My Lord, my life, my way, my end,\n Accept the praise I bring.\"\n\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, August, 1810.\n\n \"Hebrews is my ordinary, when no other passage of Scripture\nattracts my particular attention. This is the third morning I have\nopened the New Testament on the 14th chapter of John, and have fed\ndelightfully on the first three verses. There is at all times a thorn\nin my heart, keeping me in continual remembrance of my vile,\nungrateful backslidings, so that I eat my sweetest morsels with bitter\nherbs. It was particularly painful to me this morning; nevertheless;\nthe Lord God, merciful and gracious, repeated on my heart, 'Let not\nyour heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.' I was arrested at\nthe fourth verse, 'Whither I go ye know, and the way ye know.' I have\nhad many comfortable exercises on the eighth verse, the Redeemer's\nanswer to Philip's inquiry. But this morning my mind was led to a\ndifferent view of that saying, and which I think was literally\nincluded. The Redeemer was going to his Father, and his way lay\nthrough death, the death of the cross. The hour was at hand when he\nwas to make his holy and righteous soul an offering for sin, that he\nmight become the author of salvation to all who obey him. All the sins\nconfessed and pardoned by the sacrifices under the law were laid on\nthis blessed Surety--they were only the shadows, he was the\nsubstance--the real Lamb of God which taketh away the sin of the\nworld, was now to be offered up. This was he who said, 'Sacrifice and\noffering thou wouldest not, but a body hast thou prepared me; in\nburnt-offerings and offerings for sin thou hast had no pleasure; then\nsaid I, Lo, I come to do thy will, O God:' by which will we are\nsanctified through the offering of the body of Jesus Christ once\nfor all.\n\n \"He was going to the garden--Oh that garden! Peter had said he\nwas able to drink of that cup and to be baptized with that baptism. Ah\nno, Peter; that exceeding sorrow in the garden, when no visible hand\nwas upon him, was a cup the least drop of which would have overwhelmed\nthe strongest angel. No strength short of omnipotent could have\nsustained that hour and power of darkness. It was not the scourge, the\nthorns, the nails, nor the last pangs of dissolution; through all\nthese he was as a lamb led to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her\nshearers, dumb. It was a mysterious horror, of which no created being\ncan have any conception. It was this that wrung the great drops of\nblood through every pore of his sacred body--this that extorted the\nagonizing prayer, 'Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from\nme;' and again, in his last moments on the cross, 'My God, my God, why\nhast thou forsaken me?' Blessed, for ever blessed be our Jehovah\nJesus, who said, 'Not my will, but thine be done.' The will of God was\ndone, and he said, 'It is finished,' and gave up the ghost.\n\n \"All his people must follow him by the way of death; nearly all\nhis disciples followed by the death of the cross, and many others\nafter them, supported by his almighty grace, rejoiced that they were\ncounted worthy to suffer for his sake; but they drank not of that cup.\n\n \"Some of his people, for holy and wise purposes, have had a taste\nin the hiding of God's face, but no curse; that he himself drank to\nthe last drop: He trod the wine-press alone, and of the people there\nwas none with him. By his own death he destroyed him that had the\npower of death, and secured victory to all his followers: he changed\nits aspect from that of the king of terrors to that of a welcome\nmessenger from their redeeming God, to conduct them to those blessed\nmansions which he has purchased and prepared for them; neither will he\nleave them alone with that messenger: 'And if I go, I will come again\nand receive you to myself, that where I am, there ye may be also. I\nwill not leave you comfortless, I will come to you. The world seeth me\nno more, but ye see me; because I live, ye shall live also. Let not\nyour heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.' Amen. 'Come, Lord\nJesus.'\n\n \"'Sacrifice and offering thou didst not desire; mine ears hast\nthou opened: burnt-offering and sin-offering hast thou not required.\nThen said I, Lo, I come: in the volume of the book it is written of\nme, I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is in my heart.'\nPsalm 40:6. 'Above when he said, Sacrifice and offering and\nburnt-offerings and offering for sin thou wouldst not, neither hadst\npleasure therein--which are offered by the law--then said he, Lo, I\ncome to do thy will, O God. He taketh away the first, that he may\nestablish the second. By the which will we are sanctified, through the\noffering of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. This man, after he\nhad offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right\nhand of God. For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that\nare sanctified. Whereof the Holy Ghost also is a witness to us: for\nafter that he had said before, 'This is the covenant that I will make\nwith them after those days,' in consequence of Christ's doing the will\nof God, fulfilling all righteousness: 'I will put my laws into their\nhearts, and in their minds will I write them; and their sins and\niniquities will I remember no more. Now, where remission of these is,\nthere is no more offering for sin. Having, therefore, boldness to\nenter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way,\nwhich he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say,\nhis flesh; and having a High-priest over the house of God; let us draw\nnear with a true heart, in full assurance of faith, having our hearts\nsprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure\nwater. Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering;\nfor he is faithful that promised.' Hebrews 10:8-23; 8:10. Again, 'The\nLord sware, and will not repent; thou art a priest for ever after the\norder of Melchizedek. By so much was Jesus made a surety of a better\ntestament; because he continueth ever, and hath an unchangeable\npriesthood. Wherefore he is able to save them to the uttermost that\ncome unto God by him, seeing he ever liveth to make intercession for\nthem,' Heb. 7:21-25. 'Christ glorified not himself to be made a\nhigh-priest, but He that said unto him, Thou art my Son, to-day have I\nbegotten thee; as he saith also in another place, Thou art a priest\nfor ever after the order of Melchizedek.' Heb. 5:5, 6. 'For the law\nmaketh men high-priests which have infirmity; but the word of the\noath, which was since the law, maketh the Son, who is consecrated for\nevermore.' Heb. 7:28. 'The word which God sent unto the children of\nIsrael, preaching peace by Jesus Christ: He is Lord of all. How God\nanointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Ghost and with power; who\nwent about doing good, and healing all that were oppressed of the\ndevil; for God was with him. To him give all the prophets witness,\nthat through his name whosoever believeth in him shall receive\nremission of sins.'\" Acts 10:36-38, 43.\n\n\n How well she was qualified to give instruction to young\ndisciples, will appear in the following letters to two, who died\nshortly after of consumption.\n\n\n To Miss Van Wyck, New York.\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, 1810.\n\n \"MY DEAR, MY BELOVED ELIZA--Mr. and Mrs. B---- are here on a\nvisit for one night. I did not expect to see them so soon, or I would\nhave had a letter ready. I expect another opportunity in the course of\na few days, when I will send you a long letter, from my heart, and, I\nhope, dictated by your and my Teacher.\n\n \"I learn by my children that you continue much in the same way in\nwhich I left you. It is your own God who mixes your cup, and it is to\nyou a cup of blessing; there is no curse in it. Your Jesus drank that\ncup to the very dregs, that bitter as well as sweet might be to you a\ncup of blessing. O then, my darling, hold fast by your Redeemer: he is\nthe Lord your righteousness, and the Lord your strength; he connects\nyour profit with his own glory. You shall in this protracted\naffliction manifest it, and hold out the word of life to those around\nyou.* You shall witness for him that he is the Lord, and besides him\nthere is no Saviour--that he gathers the lambs in his arms, and\ncarries them in his bosom--that he is to them a hiding-place from the\nwind, and a covert from the tempest--as rivers of water in a dry\nplace, and as the shadow of a great rock in a weary land. That it is\nhe that teacheth them to profit, and leadeth them by the way that they\nshould go, and that in due time he will perfect all that concerns\nthem. Farewell.\n\n*This prediction was remarkably fulfilled in the experience of\n this dear young saint; an interesting account of whose illness\n and death was published in the Christian's Magazine, and\n afterwards as a Tract.\n\n \"Yours with affection,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n To the same.\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, Sabbath, 1810.\n\n \"MY DEAR, MY BELOVED ELIZA--I wrote you a few lines yesterday by\nMr. B----. I now propose to fulfil my promise. I expect an opportunity\nto-morrow or next day, for I saw a great many carriages pass this way\nto the tavern, as I suppose, from New York. It is a common thing with\nsome to come here on Saturday and return on Monday, to spend this\nblessed day in pastime. You would not, I know, exchange situation's\nwith them; you would rather be suffering than sinning.\n\n \"It is your own observation that God does all in wisdom; in this\nwisdom he is pleased to lengthen your day of affliction. Sin, my\ndarling, is the cause of all suffering; but is not always the\n_immediate_ cause. Besides particular chastisement for particular\nsins, there are afflictions to be filled up in the body of Christ--his\nchurch--a measure of which, in kind and degree, is appointed by\nunerring wisdom to each individual member. Col. 1:24. These sufferings\nbear no part in atoning for sin, nor in redeeming our forfeited\ninheritance. Christ trod the wine-press alone, and of the people there\nwas none to help him. He was made sin for us, who knew no sin, that we\nmight be made the righteousness of God in him; who when he had by\nhimself purged our sins, sat down on the right hand of the Majesty on\nhigh. Heb. 1:3. Again, 'And every priest,' in the Levitical law,\n'standeth daily ministering and offering oftentimes the same\nsacrifices, which can never take away sins: but this man, after he had\noffered _one sacrifice_ for sins for ever, sat down on the right\nhand of God. For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that\nare sanctified. Whereof the Holy Ghost is also a witness to us; for\nafter he had said before'--see from verse 5--'This is the covenant\nwhich I will make with them after those days, saith the Lord; I will\nput my laws into their hearts, and in their minds will I write them;\nand their sins and iniquities will I remember no more. Now, where\nremission of these is, there is no more offering for sin.' Heb.\n10:11-18. Paul says the Holy Ghost is a witness, because he copies\nfrom the ancient Scriptures the prophecies of Jer. 31:31, and Ezek.\n36:25, and from Psalm 60:7. Your mother will read to you also the\neighth chapter of Hebrews, containing the same things, the new\ncovenant, in consequence of Christ, as the surety of sinners, having\nmade full atonement, magnified the law, and made it honorable;\ntherefore there is now no condemnation to them who are in\nChrist Jesus.\n\n \"It has pleased God, my darling, in the adorable plan of\nreconciling sinners to himself by Jesus Christ, to perfect at once a\njustifying righteousness for them, and to bestow it upon them as a\nfree gift. 'This is the record, that God hath given to us eternal\nlife; and this life is in his Son.' 1 John, 5:11. But it has not\npleased him to deliver us at once from depravity; provision is made\nfor final deliverance by the same covenant, and is effected by the\nsame power: but in this believers are called to work. It is evident\nfrom Scripture, and the experience of Christians answers to it, that\nin the hour of believing they pass from death to life, considered as a\nstate. This is the hour of the new birth: they then receive life for\nthe time, and it is their privilege, by the constitution of the new\ncovenant, to ask and receive, from day to day, grace to help in every\ntime of need. To them, and not to the unregenerate, the exhortation is\naddressed, 'Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for\nit is God who worketh in you, both to will and to do, of his good\npleasure,' The means are of God's appointing, in the diligent use of\nwhich they go from strength to strength. The grand means is faith in\nGod's promises, of which there are very many in the Scriptures.\nBelievers are to put forth their own exertions, as the children of\nIsrael were called to go out against their enemies, in the faith that\nGod would give them victory and lead them to their promised rest. The\nbattle was the Lord's, and he fought for them; but the means were\ntheir exertions. Believers are God's workmanship; but this work he\ncarries on by exercising their natural powers, which he sanctifies to\na different end from that to which they were formerly by their own\nspirit directed. Still, the Scripture testifies that if any man say he\nhas no sin, he deceives himself, and the truth is not in him; and\nwhile sin remains, its consequence, suffering, must. The judgments of\nGod, as the moral Governor of the world, are denounced against, and\nexecuted upon the workers of iniquity. The children of God experience\npersonal chastisements for personal sins, as a provision of the\ncovenant. Psalm 89:30. And, if I mistake not, there are afflictions\nexperienced by individuals, as members of Christ's body, in which God\ndoes not bring into view the personal sins of the sufferer. In this\nsense I read Paul's epistle to the Colossians, 1:24: 'Who now rejoice\nin my sufferings, and fill up that which is behind of the sufferings\nof Christ in my flesh, for his body's sake, which is the church.' 'I\nsent Timotheus to establish you, and to comfort you concerning your\nfaith, that no man should be moved by these afflictions; for\nyourselves know that we are appointed thereunto.' 1 Thes. 3:3. 'Yea,\nif I be offered upon the sacrifice and service of your faith, I joy\nand rejoice with you all; for the same cause do ye joy and rejoice\nwith me.' Phil. 2:17. 'And whether we be afflicted, it is for your\nconsolation and salvation; or whether we be comforted, it is for your\nsalvation and consolation.' 2 Cor. 1:6. There is no conscious personal\nsin expressed in these sufferings; on the contrary, Paul says, 'For\nour rejoicing is this, the testimony of our conscience, that in\nsimplicity and godly sincerity, not with fleshly wisdom, but by the\ngrace of God, we have had our conversation in the world, and more\nabundantly to you-ward.' 2 Cor. 1:12.\n\n \"Most of the prophets and apostles suffered martyrdom. They\nindeed sustained public characters, but the beggar Lazarus, who, in\naddition to poverty, was full of sores, was carried by the angels from\nthe rich man's gate to Abraham's bosom. And thousands and tens of\nthousands of redeemed highly sanctified ones have suffered lengthened\nmartyrdom, and perished with hunger, in holes and caves of the earth,\nunknown in history, except in groups--unseen at the time, except by\nthe eye of the omniscient Jehovah, by whom the hairs of their head are\nnumbered; their tears are in his bottle; nor shall one sigh nor one\ngroan perish without its result.\n\n \"O my Eliza, what delightful wonders shall open to our view when\ndelivered from these prison-holds of earth.\n\n \"I have finished one sheet, my dear Eliza; I fear it is too much,\nand may prove too fatiguing, especially as there are many references\nrequiring a stretch of attention. I have been reading the epistle to\nthe Hebrews, and you have naturally got my thoughts on part of it.\n\n \"I remember once of your complaining that you had made small\nprogress in knowledge, in comparison of a young person that had just\nleft you; but you checked yourself, and said, 'The Lord has given me\nfaith, let me be thankful.' I at that time considered your departure\nas very near, and advised you to keep your eye fixed on Christ, as\nyour Redeemer and Saviour, who had performed all things for you, and\nwould perfect all that concerned you; and added, one hour in heaven\nwill make you wiser than the most enlightened saint on earth. Since\nthat it has pleased your Lord to add many days to your life. He has\nmitigated your pain, and given you some intervals of ease and\ncomposure, and our dear Eliza has grown in that time. Should it please\nGod to spare you for a yet longer season, and continue your intervals\nof ease, no subject can be so profitable; and I hope your Lord will\nmake it pleasant as that of the contents of the New Testament, which\nyour Saviour bequeathed to you, sealed and ratified in his blood.\nThere is a vast variety of precious promises contained in the\nScriptures of the Old and New Testament, which are all yours with\nChrist; for, as a member of his body, 'you are built upon the\nfoundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ himself being\nthe chief corner-stone.' And now I commend you to your own covenant\nGod, who does and will support you, through life and through death, to\nthat happy land where we shall all meet; and Oh then, eye hath not\nseen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man the\nthings he hath prepared for them that love him.\n\n \"I am, with much love and affection, yours,\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n To Mr. James Todd, New York.\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, Long Island.\n\n \"MY DEAR JAMES--This will probably be handed you by our mutual\nfriend Mrs. C----. The thought of her being with you, makes me part\nwith her with less reluctance. You have not been forgotten by either;\nwe have talked much of you, and have united in prayer to your and our\nGod, that he may manifest himself unto you as your reconciled Father\nin Christ Jesus; and give you 'joy and peace in believing'--that he\nmay give you patience in suffering, and entire resignation to his most\nholy will.\n\n \"It has, my dear young friend, been my earnest inquiry,\nespecially of late years, standing on the brink of eternity, 'What is\nthere within us, or without us, on which a sinner can rest in a dying\nhour?' If it be a holy life, there is no peace for me. Taking the law\nof God for my rule, backslider is my name; yet peace I have found, and\non the best Security; this blessed Bible is my charter. I have\nsearched it with diligence and prayer, and my mind is confirmed in the\nfollowing truths: That the whole world is become guilty before God,\nand is under his wrath and curse on that account. This is our state: a\nmiserable state it is, and as hopeless as miserable, for any thing we\ncan do merely of ourselves. But I read in this Bible to the full\namount of the following conclusions--that in the counsel of the\nmysterious Triune Jehovah, Jesus Christ, the second person of the\nincomprehensible Trinity, was sanctified, or set apart to become the\nSaviour of law-condemned sinners, to take their nature upon him,\ncomply with the requisitions of the eternal immutable law of God, and\nbecome their surety. Man is a rebel, it is put to his account: a\npenalty is incurred--He, as their surety, is made liable. Are they\nagain to be made heirs of eternal life? Perfect obedience is the\ncondition--and of Him, as their surety, it is demanded. All this being\nfulfilled, sinners are become his property: he has paid their debt,\nand merited for them eternal life, all in their own nature, as their\nHead and representative; so that believers are complete in him. This\nis the righteousness of God, wrought out by Jesus Christ, in his own\nperson, God-man, as their surety. To this nothing of the believer's is\nto be added--with this nothing of his mixed; it is for ever perfect;\nentirely distinct from that holiness of heart and life which is\nwrought in him in consequence of this. God has declared himself well\npleased with this righteousness, and that being himself reconciled, he\nis in Christ Jesus reconciling sinners to him.\n\n \"Hence all the invitations scattered thick in the Old and New\nTestament, not only to the penitent, weary, and heavy laden, but to\nthe stout-hearted, the backslider, to them that are wearying\nthemselves in their own way. 'Ho, every one that thirsteth'--'Whosoever\nwill, let him take the water of life freely,' Hence all the promises\nannexed to believing, accepting, receiving, trusting, resting: Christ\nthe Saviour is the object--the gift of God to sinners for all the\nabove purposes. The Lord has convinced me that I have nothing in\nmyself on which I can rest; my conscience echoes to his word in all\nthat it asserts of my nature and my state; but this Saviour is\nprovided for sinners exactly of this description. I am invited to put\nin my claim, I believe the record, I rest my salvation on his word;\nGod giveth to me eternal life, and this life is in his Son. Jesus\ncalls me to look unto him, and be saved; I do look unto him, and I am\nsaved. He assures me that those who come unto him shall never be cast\nout. I do go to him and commit my sinful soul to his keeping; I shall\nnot be cast out. As many as receive the gift of his Son, receive at\nthe same time power to become the children of God. I do receive his\ngift, and lay claim to his promise. He is my reconciled Father, and I\nam his adopted child, and he hath sent his Spirit into my heart, by\nwhich I can say, Abba, Father.\n\n \"I have, my dear James, taken this method of laying before you\nthe grounds of my own hope, because I think it the most simple method,\nand containing at the same time my counsel to you to lay hold on the\nsame hope. The warrant is given us in God's own word, as sinners,\nwithout respect to fruit or any works of ours. I can, if necessary,\ngive you chapter and verse, to the full amount; but you have those\nabout you who can give it to you by little and little, as your weak\nstate can bear it. This gift is held out to the sinner's acceptance in\nmany places of the word of God, and becomes the sinner's in the moment\nof believing. Provision is made by the same covenant for his\nsanctification; but that makes no part of justifying righteousness.\nChrist is made of God unto him wisdom, righteousness, sanctification,\nand redemption. Try, my precious young friend, to lay hold on this\nhope, and enter into the rest provided for the believer here. Stretch\nforth 'the withered hand,' the Lord himself will give you strength.\nCommit your precious soul into his hands, and rest assured that he\nwill perfect all that concerns you--work all his work in you--carry\nyou safely through the Jordan of death, and put you in possession of\nthe inheritance he has purchased for you. That all this shall be,\nis the prayer and firm hope of\n\n \"Your affectionate friend,\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n The two following extracts, addressed to Mrs. C----, near Boston,\npresent a very gratifying view of Mrs. Graham in her advanced years,\nand may well awaken the desire not only to die the death, but to enjoy\nthe \"fruitful old age\" of \"the righteous.\"\n\n\n \"I have, as you know, enjoyed much in life, enjoyed its dearest,\nsweetest comforts, love and friendship, with a heart tremblingly alive\nto both. Lover and friends of youth are long since gone, other\nfriendships I have formed, and have been happy even in these; now I am\nshut up with ails and aches. The world, properly so called, is a dead\nblank to me; yet I do think I never enjoyed life more. I would not\nexchange my present happiness for the most transporting moments of my\nlife--of which I have had a large share--though thousands of years\nwere added to enjoy them. I do not mean barely that happiness which\nconsists in the anticipation of pleasure beyond the grave; that is\nindeed delightful; but I enjoy life now. Books of taste are mine no\nmore: still less those of science and history; but my dear Bible;\nprecious subjects; my dear Saviour. The height, the depth, the\nbreadth, the length of the glorious plan of redemption open to my\ndelightful perception more and more, and the Spirit witnesseth with my\nspirit, that I have my part in it by the gift of _faith_. I\nbelieve the record, that God giveth to us eternal life, and I put in\nmy claim as a sinner. I account it a 'faithful saying, and worthy of\nall acceptation, that Jesus Christ came into the world to save\nsinners, of whom I am the chief,' I still enjoy the ordinances of the\ngospel: my memory, as you know, is much impaired: I recollect very\nlittle of the sermons I hear; but I think I never heard with so much\nattention. I am delighted, instructed, and fed at the time, and the\nsubjects open to me without my being able to recollect the order or\nthe words of the speaker. O let me recommend this dear Lord to your\nheart and confidence; commit all your concerns to him; mistrust no\npart of his providential dealings with you; his wisdom shall manage\nfor you, and you shall one day say, 'He hath done all things well.'\"\n\n\n \"MARCH, 1811.\n\n \"I am daily on the lookout; one year and three months will\ncomplete my threescore and ten. I do not know one individual alive\nwhom I know in my school-days; it has been the case for many years. I\ndo not long for my dismission, neither am I tired of life; but nothing\nin this world, unless closely connected with another, interests me;\nand Oh, I am tired of sin; still it cleaves to me; in all things I\ncome short, and many duties neglect altogether; for I still have a\nconsiderable, share of health, and might do some good, had I will\nequal to my opportunities; as to the power, it is not in me, but I\nknow I have it in my blessed Head, and for the asking. I cannot but\nlong to be delivered from sin, and sinful apathy in particular; for\nreally my heart must be wickedly fertile, to find out opportunities of\nmoral transgression. Food and raiment are mine without care; my\nchildren, under God, care for me. I have my dear little room, my\nBible, and books founded on it. I have a dear pastor and Christian\nfriends, lively ordinances, and also much of the Lord's presence at\ntimes; my cup runs over with blessings, but my gratitude bears no\nproportion; my zeal for the glory of God and the good of my\nfellow-sinners seems buried under self-indulgence and apathy. O that\nthe goodness of the Lord may lead me to repentance.\n\n \"And now, my dear friend, let me know how it is with you and your\ndear family. The severe winter is past; how have you got along? with\nwhat temporal comfort, and how has the Lord dealt with your soul? Has\nthe barrel of meal or the cruse of oil failed? Does the opening spring\ncheer your spirits, and furnish a song of praise? Does it find you in\na situation to dig your garden, sow your seeds, and make provision for\nfuture comfort? Has the Lord turned your captivity, and dried up the\nbitter waters that flowed against you? How are your eyes, after all\nthe briny tears that have steeped them? How are your poor nerves,\nafter all the shocks that have agitated them? All these things have\nbeen on my mind; but from my long silence, you cannot believe it. What\nare we all, but broken reeds, which pierce the hand when laid hold of\nfor support? There is but one Friend to poor, fallen, miserable man,\nin the universe. He is mercy; he is goodness; he is truth; he is\nwisdom; he is unchangeable, and never will fail you: take him to your\nheart; give it all to him; he only is worthy, no other is.\"\n\n\n Her friend Mrs. C---- had now experienced new trials, by which\nshe was again plunged into the depth of despondency. In the following\nwe have a noble effort of Mrs. Graham's mind and heart to raise her up\nto \"sit in heavenly places in Christ Jesus.\"\n\n\n \"JUNE 27, 1811.\n\n \"I received my dear friend's letter this day week, and have been\nanswering it ever since. Never was I in such a strait. It contains the\neffusions of disappointed hopes and anticipations of sore evils;\nindicates a soul deeply wounded, and taking in Christian principles\nunder temptation. Where shall I begin? I have laid it before our\ncompassionate High-priest, I have requested direction. Assist me, O\nthou blessed Comforter, whose office it is to convince of sin, as well\nas to minister consolation. Do both, from the heart and by the pen of\nthy handmaid.\n\n \"It appears to me salutary to call your attention first to the\nsovereignty of God. The silver and the gold are his, and the cattle on\na thousand hills; he gives them to whomsoever he pleases; he setteth\nup one and putteth down another, doing whatsoever pleaseth him in the\narmies of heaven, and among the inhabitants of this earth; none can\nstay his hand, or say unto him, What doest thou? He attributes to\nhimself all events; men and other creatures are but instruments. Men's\nwicked hearts impel them to commit evil, but the events are of the\nLord, which he overrules for his own glory, and for the good of his\npeople. 'Him being delivered by the determinate counsel' of God, ye\nhave taken, and by wicked hands have crucified him. Joseph said, 'Ye\nthought evil against me; but God meant it for good,' 'to save much\npeople alive.' The Lord does not often, at the time, give his people\nreasons for afflicting them, though they can often read them at an\nafter-period.\n\n \"Job was a holy man; his afflictions from God's own hand were\nvery deep; the teasing unkindness and injustice of his friends made\ngreat part of the temptation, and he spoke unadvisedly with his lips.\nWhen God did appear, he did not answer his cavils, nor give him one\nreason why he had dealt with him thus; but silenced him with views of\nhis majesty, power, and wisdom--of his own meanness and vileness,\nthough correct in his conduct beyond most others. I believe he spoke\ntruth when he said, 'I delivered the poor that cried, and the\nfatherless, and him that had none to help him. The blessing of him\nthat was ready to perish came upon me, and I caused the widow's heart\nto sing for joy. I was eyes to the blind, and feet was I to the lame.\nI was a father to the poor, and the cause which I knew not, I searched\nout.' God allowed the weight of the trial to be upon his spirit, with\nthe conviction of his presumption, till he brought him to his feet.\n'Behold, I am vile, what shall I answer thee?' 'I will lay my hand\nupon my mouth.' 'I abhor myself, and repent in dust and ashes.' These\nthings were written for our example and profit.\n\n \"This afflictive providence is now finished, at least so far.\nWhat you now possess is the allotment of your God. Set all instruments\naside and listen to the Holy Ghost: 'Humble yourselves under the\nmighty hand of God, and he shall exalt you in due time.' In order to\nthis, I would recommend to you to take a close, retrospective view of\nyour past life, with earnest prayer that God would search you and try\nyou, and show you what wicked ways have been or now are in you. Go\nback to the days of your youth; take a close view of the use you made\nof affluence and influence; not comparing yourself with others, but\njudging yourself by the law of God, the only standard of right and\nwrong, truth and error. Seek for humbling views of yourself in\nyourself. If the Holy Ghost enlighten, you will find sufficient\ngrounds. Seek for consolation in the free promises of God, through\nJesus Christ, of which there are also abundance, even to the chief of\nsinners. What I recommend to you has been my own practice, especially\nin times of trial; and if health will admit of it, add fasting,\nbecause I think it is the Lord's ordinance. 'The days shall come when\nthe bridegroom shall be taken from them, then shall they fast in\nthose days.'\n\n \"Read the third chapter of Jeremiah's lamentations; endeavor to\ncome under the feelings of contrition on account of your sins, and\nderive consolation from faith in God's great mercy; ever keeping in\nview the only channel through which mercy can flow to sinners of\nAdam's race. Take also a view of God's dealings with his elect nation,\nin the wilderness: they had nothing but manna, and were punished for\nmurmuring; while at that very time the nations in Canaan, the\nEgyptians, and Assyrians, were living in all manner of luxury. What\nwas their whole history but backsliding, threatening upon threatening?\nthen chastisement, turning, repenting, pardon, reconciliation, and the\nsame round again, every chastisement severer than the last, while\nworldlings in general have their day to the end; then 'are they\nbrought into desolation as in a moment.' I wish you to take a\nparticular view of God's dealings with them, before Nebuchadnezzar\nsacked the city of Jerusalem. The decree was passed after many\nwarnings, and much long-suffering. How many pauses, as it were, did\nthe merciful Lord God make before he gave them finally up to their\nenemies; and when the decree was irrevocable, and the chastisement to\ntake place, still he followed them with mercy. See Jeremiah 27:12; and\nchapter 29, the letter which God commanded Jeremiah to write to those\nwho had been carried away captive with Jehoiakim, advising them to\nbuild houses and plant vineyards, and to make the most of their\nsituation. Those at Jerusalem were commanded to submit to the king of\nBabylon, as in that case he would not destroy the city; but no, they\nstood it out, and the threatened vengeance overtook them.\n\n \"The poor were left to take care of the vineyards. Jeremiah\nremained with them in preference to going with the king of Babylon to\nbe promoted to honor. God offered to take them under his protection\nand be their God: but no, they would go to Egypt, and put themselves\nunder the king of Egypt's protection. Jeremiah told them from the\nLord, that Egypt itself should soon go into captivity. But to Egypt\nthey went and carried Jeremiah with them. See Isaiah's prophecy on\nthis occasion, chapter 30:1-4. Now look at chapter 42:24; there you\nsee God's judgment and chastening; follow him in the beginning of\nchapter 43, and view his mercy; in the end of the same chapter, again,\nsee his charge against them, but it is followed, with mercy,\nnot judgment.\n\n \"Thus we learn the character of God. Thus we learn his dealings\nwith his people. They are not called to earthly comfort and\nprosperity. They ever have been, and still are a suffering people;\nthey are all sinners--sin brings suffering, and God overrules\nsuffering, so as to make it profitable to them. Though redeemed by the\nlife and death of Christ, being justified by faith, they have peace\nwith God; yet the Lord has not pleased all at once to qualify them for\nthe purchased possession. They receive a new birth, new life, and are\ncalled to work out their own salvation with fear and trembling, with\nthis consolation, that God worketh in them both to will and to do of\nhis good pleasure. This is not their home, here they have no\ncontinuing city; they are travelling through the wilderness, to the\ncity and mansions purchased and prepared for them by their Saviour,\nand must be made holy before they can enter in. They have many\ncorruptions to be mortified, and many errors in their estimation of\nmen and things to be corrected. Their hearts require to be made\nspiritual, humble, tender, resigned, and loving. 'Who fed thee in the\nwilderness with manna--that he might humble thee, and that he might\nprove thee, to do thee good at thy latter end.'\n\n \"Besides, all suffering is not the immediate punishment of sin in\nthe individual sufferer, nor for his exclusive profit; it is evident\nfrom Scripture, there is suffering for the benefit of the body of\nChrist, _his church_, of which, I think, all have some share. God\nhas wise ends to answer by all the suffering of his creatures, and\nespecially of the members of his body. The apostles rejoiced in this,\nand so ought we. 'If we suffer with him, we shall also reign with\nhim.' Paul says, 'I fill up in my flesh that which is behind of the\nsufferings of Christ, for his body's sake, which is the church.'\n\n \"Now, my dear friend, look at your real situation, as a suffering\nmember of a suffering body. Take a view of the saints of God in\nhistory, sacred or profane, and compare your own individual suffering\nwith theirs: I am apt to think that, great as it is, it will not rise\nto mediocrity. I could expatiate on this subject, from what comes\nevery day within my own knowledge. The Lord is working in this way all\naround me; but of that another time. In your own case, try for a\nmoment to shut out of view every thing without your own family, what\nyou once were, what you once possessed and enjoyed; also what your\nfriends possess and enjoy at this present time; detach yourself from\nall. What was yours is gone; what you calculated upon is also gone;\nset all aside, and consider yourself a sinner saved from destruction\nby grace; in a state of purgation and preparation for happiness; on a\npilgrimage with thousands of others your fellow-saved sinners, through\nthe wilderness, to that inheritance which was purchased for you at\n_such a price_. Your Saviour is your leader, protector, provider;\nalso your physician, and the physician of the whole body, perfectly\nacquainted with the constitution, disposition, and temper of every\nindividual. He has made provision for each, all the journey through,\nand given security that none shall suffer _real_ want.\n\n \"Bread and water are promised; nothing beyond these, though in\ngeneral he gives more; to each he gives a portion in hand, to some for\na day, some for a week, some for a year, which they calculate upon\nwith more or less probability: none with certainty. Your portion\nis--for a year; take a view of those whom you know; one with another,\nI am inclined to think the Lord has still given you your full share of\nprivilege. Look at the ordinary provision he makes for the ministers\nof his gospel, most of them with large families; many of those in the\ncountry have five hundred dollars, some four hundred, some three\nhundred, generally ill paid. The Lord puts a blessing in it, he makes\nit go far; they do what their hands find to do, and get along: so will\nhe do with you, my dear. He will put you upon methods of industry and\neconomy: your one chicken divided into six parts, with a little bit of\npork, with the fruit of God's blessing on your industry in the garden,\nshall both taste sweet and satisfy for the time. Try to be thankful;\nMoses said of the manna, 'This is the bread which the Lord your God\ngiveth you.' Pray and watch against dwelling on the plentiful tables\nof others; and when bidden to a feast take your portion, and say, this\nis from the Lord for the time. Do not let a thought of misery or\nwretchedness dwell upon your mind. O no, God is good; you shall not\nwant. O, what sweet meals have I and my children made on hot potatoes,\nnicely boiled and cracked, with salt--not merely content, but they\ntasted good and savory. There are peculiar pleasures in a life of that\nkind. You shall yet sing of it.\n\n \"Now, my dear friend, I have done with what I had to say on this\nhead. I have had great fears of wounding, lest you should reckon me\namong Job's friends; but you call me mother, and it is required of a\nmother to be faithful. I now leave it with the Lord. We are delighted\nto find you girding up the loins of your mind and setting about active\nduty. Let us meet at a throne of grace, and look to the course the\nLord marks out for us.\"\n\n\n To Mrs. G---- Y----.\n\n \"MY DEAR MADAM--I have just parted with my dear afflicted friend\nMrs. C----; she left it in charge to me, that I should write to you in\nthe time of your affliction. Surely I would do any thing whatever that\nI thought might alleviate either her or your distress. But there are\ncases to which God alone can speak; afflictions which he alone can\nconsole. Such are those under which the sufferer is commanded to be\n'still and know that he is God.' He never leaves his people in any\ncase, but sometimes shuts them up from human aid. Their grief is too\ngreat to be consoled by human tongue or pen.\n\n \"Such I have experienced. I lost my only son; I neither know when\nnor where; and for any thing I know, in a state of rebellion against\nGod. Here at my heart it lies still; who can speak to me of it?\nneither can I reason upon it. Aaron held his peace. Old Eli said, 'It\nis the Lord; let him do what seemeth him good.' Samuel in his turn had\nhis heart wrung by his ungodly son. David lamented over his beloved\nAbsalom; but it availed him nothing. Job's sons and daughters were all\ncut off in one day; he himself lay in deep, sore bodily affliction;\nhis friends sat seven days and seven nights without opening their\nmouths, because they saw his affliction was very great; and if they\nspoke, it was to aggregate it; and when God himself spoke, he gave him\nno reason for his dealings, but charged him with folly and madness.\n'Shall he that contendeth with the Almighty instruct him? He that\nreproveth God, let him answer it.' Then he laid his hand on his mouth,\nconfessed himself vile, and became dumb before God; abhorring himself,\nand repenting in dust and ashes, instead of the splendid catalogue of\nvirtues enumerated in chapter 29, and complaints in chapter 10, which\nI make not the least doubt were true, as far as human virtue can\nreach; but if God charge even his angels with folly, shall man,\ncorrupt, self-destroyed man, plead merit before God?\n\n \"But, my dear friend, I do not find in all God's Bible any thing\nrequiring us to acquiesce in the final destruction of any, for whom we\nhave prayed, pleaded, and committed to him; least of all, our\noffspring whom he has commanded us to train up for him. Children are\nGod's heritage. I do not say he has given us any promise for the\nobstinately wicked; but when cut off, he only requires us to be still,\nto hold our peace. I do not think he takes hope from us. God has set\nlimits to our faith for others; our faith must not rest in opposition\nto his threatenings. We must believe that the wicked shall be turned\ninto hell, and all that forget God; but he hath set no bounds to his\nown mercy; in that glorious plan of redemption, by which he\nsubstitutes his own Son in the stead of sinners, he has made provision\nfor the chief of sinners, and can now be just and consistent while he\njustifies the ungodly who believe in Jesus. Short was the time between\nthe thief's petition and the promise of salvation; nay, the petition\nwas the earnest of it. The same was the case with the jailer; I think,\ntoo, the publican had the earnest in his petition. Now, instead of\nlaboring to bring my mind to acquiesce in the condemnation of my\nchild, on the supposition of its being for God's glory, I try to be\nstill, as he has commanded: not to follow my child to the yet\ninvisible world; but turning my eyes to that character which God has\nrevealed of himself--to the plan of redemption--to the sovereignty of\nGod in the execution of that plan--to his names of grace, 'The Lord,\nthe Lord God, merciful and gracious, long-suffering, and abundant in\ngoodness and truth, forgiving iniquity, and transgression, and sin,'\nwhile he adds, 'and that will by no means clear the guilty;' I meet it\nwith his own declaration, 'He hath made Him to be sin for us who knew\nno sin, that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.' I read\nalso that 'mercy rejoiceth against judgment,' and many other like\nscriptures, which, although I dare not ground a belief of his\nsalvation on them, afford one ray of hope after another, that God may\nhave made him a monument of mercy to the glory of his grace.\n\n \"Thus God himself consoles his own praying people, while man\nought to be very cautious, if not silent, where the Scriptures are\nsilent, as it respects the final state of another, whose heart we\ncannot know, nor what God may have wrought in it. God hath set bounds\nto our faith, which can nowhere find solid ground to fix upon but in\nhis own written promise. Yet, as I said above, he has set no bounds to\nhis own mercy, and he has made provision for its boundless flow, as\nfar as he shall please to extend it, through the atonement and merits\nof his own Son, 'who is able to save to the uttermost all who come\nunto God by him,' Now, my dear friend, you have my ideas of our\nsituation; if they be correct, I pray that our compassionate Father\nmay comfort you by them; if otherwise, may he pardon what is amiss,\nand lead you, my dear friend C----, and myself, to such consolation as\nhe himself will own as the work of his Spirit, and save us from the\nenemy and our own spirit.\n\n \"Since writing the foregoing, I feel afraid of what I have said;\nit is dangerous seeking comfort where the Scriptures are silent; yet\nwhile we plead with God to be preserved from error, and try to be\nstill before him, he will save us from the subtlety of the serpent, as\nwell as from the rage of the lion. I am, with love,\n\n \"Your sympathizing friend,\n\n \"ISABELLA GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n \"ROCKAWAY, September 10, 1811.\n\n \"I have been here four Sabbaths. The first I spent at home, the\nweather not permitting our going abroad; the second I spent at a\nprayer-meeting with the Methodist brethren; the third we rode to\nHempstead, where I heard two plain gospel sermons from Mr. C----,\nPresbyterian minister; and the last I attended at the Episcopal\nchurch, same place; heard a good plain gospel sermon from Mr. H----,\nand witnessed the dispensation of the Lord's supper.\n\n \"To sing the praises of our redeeming God, and to lift up my\nheart in prayer with my fellow-sinners, in the comfortable hope that\nthere are other living souls praising and praying with me, refreshes\nme: to hear the word of God read, and to be led to meditate upon it,\nhowever simple and common the exposition, also refreshes me. I am\ngenerally led to pray much for minister and people; to consider myself\nas one with them in Christ. However weak his natural powers, however\nfew or small his talents, if I have reason to think that he is taught\nof God that which flesh and blood cannot teach, I desire to esteem him\nhighly for his work's sake. I thank God for the meanest and weakest\nof such: I believe they never labor in vain. 'Out of the mouths of\nbabes and sucklings,' in talents as well as in years, God will\nperfect praise.\n\n \"In this new world, thickly settled in many places with natural\nmen 'eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage,' while the\nflood of wrath is hastening to overwhelm them, and none to warn them\nof their danger, nor point out the ark of safety; shall such men be\nreckoned of none account, and their labors of no value? No, the wealth\nof both Indies cannot balance their work; nor all the talents ever\npossessed by fallen man, with all the orthodoxy which mere talents are\ncapable of acquiring, without that divine teaching which many of\nthose, thus contemned, possess. That same small discourse, those few\nplain points, these same things repeated in the same way, contain\ntruths by which sinners may be saved, by which sinners shall be saved.\n\n \"Suppose, for it is but a supposition, that these men have made a\nmistake. They are the Lord's, and in their place by his providence. He\nwill be forth-coming for them, and without miracle. From him shall\ntheir fruit be found, and his power be manifested by their weakness.\nExert your energies, ye gifted doctors of divinity; and may the Lord\nprosper the means used to produce a ministry which shall render\nattendance upon their ministrations the interest of both the\nunderstanding and the heart. Persuade men who are adding field to\nfield, house to house, thousand to thousand, to provide a competent\nmaintenance for them. If these last remain obstinate, and it be idle\nto hope that youths of talents without fortune, whatever be their\npiety, will serve the church of God at the expense of devoting\nthemselves to infallible penury, and all the wretchedness which\nbelongs to it--is it wise to weaken the hands and discourage the\nhearts of those ministers already settled pastors, or to furnish their\npeople with arguments in their own vindication for leaving them in\nwant and penury?\"\n\n\n In the year 1811, some gentlemen of New York established a\nMagdalen Society: they elected a board of ladies, requesting their aid\nto superintend the internal management of the Magdalen House. This\nboard chose Mrs. Graham their presiding lady, which office she held\nuntil her decease; the duties attendant on it she discharged with\nfidelity and zeal. In 1812 the trustees of the Lancasterian school\nsolicited the attendance of several pious ladies, to give catechetical\ninstruction to their scholars one afternoon in every week: and Mrs.\nGraham was one of those who attended regularly to this duty.\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER XI.\n\n DEVOTIONAL EXERCISES AND CORRESPONDENCE.\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY 8, 1812.\n\n \"'By faith Moses, when he was come to years, refused to be called\nthe son of Pharaoh's daughter; esteeming the reproach of Christ\ngreater riches than the treasures of Egypt; for he had respect unto\nthe recompense of the reward: choosing rather to suffer affliction\nwith the people of God, than to enjoy the pleasures of sin for a\nseason.' Heb. 11:24.\n\n \"All that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer\npersecution; the natural heart is enmity against God, and hates his\nimage wherever found. If individual Christians have the favor of\nindividual worldlings, it never is for their piety, that is rather\nborne with than loved; and too often Christians save themselves from\nreproach by unfaithfulness; that, alas, has been my sin and shame. In\nall my friendships with worldlings, some of which have been tender,\nhow unfaithful have I been to friendship's highest office. How seldom\nhave I endeavored to rescue my friend from sin and Satan, by leading\nher to the Friend of sinners, the source of happiness. Contenting my\nvile, selfish heart, with things pertaining to this life unconnected\nwith that to come, leaving her under the influence of 'the lust of the\neye, the lust of the flesh, and the pride of life;' without eyes to\nsee her danger, or friend to warn her of it; and while she\ncommunicated with me in things common to both, in all the good she\nknew, keeping back nothing from me of all she possessed; how often\nhave I concealed my richest treasure, without inviting her to the\nparticipation. O, faithless friend! O, ungrateful, unfaithful--first\nto that gracious God who opened mine own eyes, arrested ray attention,\nstopped up my path, and turned me to the way of life; and next to\nmy friend, whom I have left to pursue that same way of death,\nwithout attempting to lead her to this same sovereign, merciful,\ngracious Deliverer.\n\n \"And what withheld! Shame belongs to the heart governed by such\nmotives; fear of contempt, reproach, or, at most, the loss of a carnal\nfriendship. Of three such friends, now gone to their place, two\ncontinued their worldly course to the last, so far as I know; for the\nthird the Lord provided a more faithful friend, who became worker\ntogether with the Spirit of God, led her to the Friend of sinners, who\nhas compassion on the ignorant, and them that are out of the way, By\nHim she was received, and in Him she found life, light, and peace.\n\n \"She soon outran faithless me in the heavenly race; gently chid\nme for my remissness, but continued my friend and helper. Ever\nforemost in the race, humble and steady in faith, she looked not back,\nnor halted. She has long since finished her course, received her crown\nand reward of grace, and become fruit to the account of that friend\nwho supplied what was wanting in me. I rejoice with them both, give\nglory to God, from whom their fruit was found, and take shame and\nconfusion for my part.\n\n \"How many opportunities have I lost, and from the same sinful,\nshameful cause. O my Redeemer, what can I say to thee? Words are\nwanting to express my loathing of that vile, selfish cowardice.\n\n \"Didst Thou, who art the Creator of heaven and earth, the\nbrightness of the glory of God, the express image of his person, and\nupholder of all things, suffer shame, contempt, anguish, death for my\nsake, that thou mightest redeem me from the second death, and purchase\nfor me eternal life; and do I shrink and turn away from the least\ntaste of thy cup, though the curse is extracted and a blessing\ninfused!\n\n \"And after all this, art thou pacified towards me? I search in\nvain for words to express the amazing grace. 'As the heaven is high\nabove the earth, so great is his mercy towards them that fear him, and\ntowards vile me, who can lay small claim to that character; yet, as\nfar as the east is from the west, so far has he removed my\ntransgressions from him. Bless the Lord, ye his angels, who excel in\nstrength, that do his commandments, hearkening to the voice of his\nword. Bless the Lord, all ye his hosts, ye ministers of his that do\nhis pleasure; ye ministering spirits, sent forth to watch over and\nminister to them who shall be heirs of salvation.\"\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY, 1812.\n\n \"Dr. M----. 'Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of\nthe world,' John 1:29.\n\n \"He dwelt chiefly on the substitution of the victim in the room\nof the transgressor. When a victim was offered for an individual, he\nwas to lay his hand on the head of the animal, by the appointment of\nGod, as a token of his faith that his sins should be transferred to\nthe victim which suffered death in his stead, and that his sins were\nforgiven and his person accepted. If the victim was for the whole\ncongregation, then the elders, as their representatives, were to lay\ntheir hands upon the head of the victim, signifying the same faith.\nGreat was the subject of the plan of redemption: The Son of God\nclothed with our nature, given and set apart as a propitiatory\nsacrifice, the victim upon whom the sins of his elect were laid, and\nhe sacrificed in their stead.\n\n \"The Lamb of God, which took away the sins not only of the Jewish\ntransgressors, but the sins of the elect out of every nation, kindred,\nand tongue throughout the world--on this Lamb of God rests my own\nindividual hope for pardon and for acceptance. I lay my own individual\nhand of faith on his dear head, confess my sin, and rely upon his\nsacrifice for pardon and acceptance, through the atonement made by\nhimself, God's anointed Priest.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, April, 1812.\n\n \"Dr. Romeyn. 'Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus\nshall suffer persecution.' 2 Timothy 3:12. Gone as usual; but it came\nhome to my heart. I have not suffered persecution; and why? because my\nlife has not testified sufficiently against a sinful world. Alas,\nalas! the world loves its own, and I have been so accommodating, to\nsay the least, as not to disturb it. 'The carnal mind is enmity\nagainst God; is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be;'\nbut the world saw little in me of that image which they hate, and\nenough of assimilation to balance that little. O my God, my\nlong-suffering, sin-pardoning God, thou knowest my vile cowardice;\nwith professors a professor of thy name, with worldlings a seeming\nworldling. And now the season is past, the opportunity lost; the time\nof life is arrived when the world itself expects to be abandoned. No\nline of conduct in me will now reprove them; they account it wise to\nlook out for a better portion, when the world can no longer be\nenjoyed; and through the deceitfulness of their own hearts, and the\nsuggestions of the ever-vigilant enemy of souls, may be hardened in\nsin, by hoping to become religious in old age. O, let thy grace\nprevent it.\n\n \"The sinfulness, and O, the ingratitude of my past life rise in\nmagnitude every review I take of it. And what can I say? Father,\nforgive. Yes, I dare say, Father, forgive. I dare say more, Thou hast\nforgiven. This grief of heart proves that thou hast not sealed me up\nin impenitence. Thou rememberest thy covenant with me in the days of\nmy youth, when thou didst draw me with the cords of love and the bands\nof a man; and though no language can express my baseness and my\ningratitude, through all my backsliding life, thy covenant stands\nfast.\n\n \"'I remember, and am confounded, and will never open my mouth any\nmore because of my shame, now that thou art pacified towards me for\nall that I have done. And I know that thou art the Lord.\n\n Contrition dwell within this breast,\n That God within this heart may rest:\n Shame and confusion flush this face,\n And magnify this glorious grace.\n Grace be my theme while I have breath,\n And on my quivering lips in death.\n Angels and fellow-sinners, say,\n Will you not join me in this lay,\n Now, and through heaven's eternal day?\n\n \"Blessed Comforter, thou seest old age upon me, loss of memory,\nand a desultory mind; I cannot retain even the substance of my dear\npastor's sermons. I thank thee for the food and refreshment at the\ntime, and often after for refreshing meditations on the same subjects.\nI commit all to thee; keep them for me, and feed me with these truths\nas thou seest I need. O be to me memory, judgment, presence of mind,\nfor order, regularity, and natural powers are gone. I rejoice in my\ndear Saviour, who of God is made unto me wisdom, righteousness,\nsanctification, and redemption. He shall perfect that which concerneth\nme, and finish the work he has begun. Therefore I say, All is well.\"\n\n\n \"COMMUNION SABBATH, May 17, 1812.\n\n \"Was much melted under a sense of indwelling sin, and the\ndeceitfulness of the human heart, and of my own heart in particular. I\nhave been. I think, much in the exercise of contrition for the sins of\nmy past life, and exercised in watching over my words, thoughts, and\nactions; now that the Lord has delivered me from all necessity to\ncare, having every thing provided for me _necessary to life and\ngodliness:_ pleasant food and clothing both for body and mind; my\ndear room, retirement, fire, candle, attendance; my precious Bible,\nand precious, lively, spiritual ordinances; a faithful and beloved\npastor, who feeds me with truth: I taste it, and I am fed. I am, as\nthe Lord God merciful and gracious has awarded, under the constant\ninfluence of shame and confusion for my highly aggravated\ntransgressions: but I also enjoy the full sense of pardon; being\njustified by faith, I have peace with God through our Lord Jesus\nChrist; and knowing that I have a 'great high-priest that is passed\ninto, the heavens, Jesus the Son of God,' I am enabled to hold fast my\nprofession, comforted by this, that I have not a high-priest who\ncannot be touched with the feeling of my infirmities, but was in all\npoints tempted as we are, yet without sin. I dare come, not very\nboldly, for I am under much depression, to the throne of grace, that I\nmay obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Every time is\na time of need with me, for sin still dwelleth in me. I have peace\nwith God through my dear Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, but am at\nconstant war with myself. I plead thy promise, that thou wilt subdue\nmy iniquities, that sin shall not have dominion over me. And now,\nCaptain of salvation, I renew the fight, but it is depending upon thee\nto fight for me, with me, and in me. I will set myself to watch, but I\nshall watch in vain, if thou keep not the avenues of my heart, and the\ndoor of my lips. O, clothe me with thy meek and lowly spirit.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, July 26, 1812.\n\n \"Tired of the bustle of Rockaway, and having some subordinate\nmotives for returning home for a time, I embraced this season in\nparticular; having, in the compass of one week, Sabbath, Wednesday my\nbirthday, and the day set apart both by the General Assembly of our\nchurch and the Governor of our state, for fasting, prayer, and\nhumiliation, besides lectures on the same evening. I returned\ntherefore on Friday, the 24th.\n\n \"Dr. R---- preached from Psalm 27:1,'The Lord is my light and my\nsalvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of\nwhom shall I be afraid?'\n\n \"O my God, my merciful and gracious God, what can I say of thy\namazing, distinguishing mercy to me? Delivered from all these fears,\nand able to adopt the text fully, I know of none who have more or\ngreater cause of fear as sinners. My transgressions have been of\n_crimson_ and _scarlet_ hue. O my God, thou knowest them,\nwords cannot paint them. My Saviour, thou knowest them, for thou\nbaredst them; every jot and tittle was put to thy account, and thou\ndidst cancel all. O that garden, that cry on the cross! the effects\nwere seen on thy sacred body, but who can conceive the mysterious\nhorror which agonized thy sacred soul? But thou saidst, _It is\nfinished,_ and finished it is. Lamb of God, which takest away the\nsins of the world, on thy consecrated head I lay the hand of faith,\nconfess my sins, pray for forgiveness, and believe that I am forgiven.\n\n \"July 29th, my birthday, and the last day of the threescore years\nand ten of my sinful life. What an, exhibition will that day produce,\nwhen the secrets of all hearts will be laid open, all my actions and\nall the springs of them. In all the myriads which shall appear at the\nbar of God, will there be such a sinner--taking into view the early\ngrace manifested?\n\n \"Born, I think, about the seventeenth year of my natural life;\npreviously instructed in the doctrines and precepts of the Scriptures,\nas far as the natural mind can conceive, by pious parents and a\nfaithful pastor; with milk provided for my spiritual infancy, and\nricher food set before me for my growth; the leaves of the new\ncovenant were opened to my view, and the fulness treasured in Christ\nfor my supply, to be asked, to be delighted in; and delighted I was,\nand satisfied. But Oh, I forsook the fountain of living waters, and\nhewed out broken cisterns, that could hold no water. Where can\nlanguage be found to depict my ingratitude, my madness, my folly; and\nwhere to describe the long-suffering, the compassionate remonstrances,\nthe kindly, fatherly chastisements, the repeated pardons and\nrestorations of my gracious God in days of youth--aggravating my\nrenewed backslidings, bringing upon my sinful soul vengeance for my\ninventions? What were the sins of Israel and Judah to mine? Mine were\ncommitted after the great atonement was made; the adorable\nHigh-priest, Jesus, had with his own blood entered within the veil,\nand was set on the right hand of the throne of the Majesty of the\nheavens: the minister of the sanctuary, and of the true tabernacle,\nwhich the Lord pitched, and not man. The new covenant was exhibited,\nestablished on better promises, himself the Mediator. The new and\nliving way was consecrated to the holiest of all by the blood of\nJesus; a throne of grace was established, Jesus himself our Advocate\nand Intercessor. We are now privileged to come boldly to a throne of\ngrace, that we may find grace to help in the time of need. O how\naggravated my sin above theirs, having such great and precious\nprivileges and promises, and a High-priest who can be touched with the\nfeeling of our infirmities, who was in all points tempted as we are;\nwho owns us as his brethren and sisters, yea, the very _members of\nhis body_, and his Spirit dwelleth in us.\n\n \"I set apart the day for fasting and deep humiliation; took\nanother survey of my past sinful life; confessed particulars on my\nknees, and made a fresh application to the blood of sprinkling which\ncleanseth from all sin; took a fresh hold of his new covenant of\npromise. 'This is the covenant that I will make with them after those\ndays, saith the Lord; I will put my laws in their hearts, and in their\nminds will I write them, and their sins and their iniquities will I\nremember no more.' Lord, do as thou hast said. I rest my immortal soul\non thy promise.\"\n\n\n \"JULY 30, 1812.\n\n \"The day set apart by the General Assembly and State Legislature\nfor fasting and humiliation, confession of sin and prayer.\n\n \"Our pastor read the second chapter of Jeremiah, a great portion\nof which belongs to my own character as an individual; and is laid up\nas part of that provision which is to support me through the last\nstage in the wilderness, and through Jordan, over which I must shortly\npass; laid in as a proof of the amazing long-suffering of God, and his\nreadiness to forgive even the vile backslider in heart and life, as\nproclaimed in chapter three.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, NOV. 22.\"\n\n \"'Turn ye to the strong-hold, ye prisoners of hope.' Zech. 9:12.\nMy Jesus--my hope, my stronghold, my safety, my Saviour, my portion,\nmy life, my happiness--yes, my happiness, for safe I am and happy,\nthough sometimes in heaviness, for yet sin dwelleth in me, and in\nothers dear as my own soul; and though I know it is pardoned, and\nprovision made for pardon to the end, yet, O it is bitter, and bitter\nlet it be. I would not have it otherwise. Heal my depravity, O God;\ntake sin out of this heart; O fill it with love to thee, and to all my\nfellow-sinners. My dear High-priest, it can be but a little further to\nJordan. My seventy years are run. Does not the ark of the covenant\nappear, going before me? am I not called to decamp and follow after? O\nmy blessed, blessed High-priest, keep my eye fixed on thy person, and\nlet me the little further follow thee step by step, foot after foot,\nwithout losing one mark all the way to Jordan; and there let me see\nthee. Blessed ark of the covenant, roll back the waters of terror,\nstand firm in Jordan, and bid me come unto thee, and set up the stones\nof memorial in a song of praise in the midst of Jordan.\n\n \"O then thy glory let me see,\n Then cause thy face to shine on me,\n And tune my heart, and tune my voice,\n And language furnish to rejoice,\n That all around may lend their tongue,\n And sweetly join my dying song.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, December 8, 1812.\n\n \"'Though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou wilt revive me:\nthou shalt stretch forth thy hand against mine enemies, and thy right\nhand shall save me.' 'The Lord will perfect that which concerns me:\nthy mercy, O Lord, endureth for ever: forsake not the works of thine\nown hands.' Psalm 138:7, 8.\n\n \"I will no longer mourn over loss of memory; I think the Lord has\nmore than made it up to me by his sensible presence while hearing and\napplying the sermon to my heart at the time; not only so, he\nenlightens my understanding; it opens more to the elucidations of my\npastor; and though I forget the words and the order of his discourses,\nI am instructed in the knowledge of the subject and the Scriptures in\ngeneral. Shall I deny the grace of God through fear or pride? I see it\nnot to be my duty. Can I attribute any thing to myself? No; shame and\nconfusion of face belong to me, for my carelessness and idleness in\nthe use of means during health and strength of body and mind. Never\nhas God dealt with me as I sinned, but according to his own mercy, and\nin a way of great sovereignty. Let me record his great goodness, his\ntender mercies, and bless his name.\n\n \"Old age is upon me, and some of its infirmities; my memory is\nmuch impaired, and my mind in temporal things and subjects becomes\nvery desultory. Not so in spirituals: I think I not only hear and read\nwith more intense attention and prompt application, but my mind is\nmore disposed to meditation; and though I cannot remember much of the\nsermons I hear, yet my mind is often furnished with happy and\nprofitable thoughts on the same subjects; and I find myself instructed\nwithout remembering the instructions. This is evidently from the Lord.\nIt appears to me also that I have not lost the sensibility of youth. I\noften shed tears, not only of compunction, but of gratitude. I seldom\ncommune without tears. I think much of death; am solemnized, but\nnot afraid.\n\n \"As far as I know, my confidence rests upon a\nsurety-righteousness, exclusive of every thing in myself. I am not\nconscious of self-righteousness; I have no complacency in any thing\never done by me. I not only believe that in all things I come short,\nand that sin is mixed in all I do, because God hath said so, but am\nsensible of the particular depravity. It is my sincere desire to be\nstript of every thing that is mine--sins and duties laid in one\nheap--and to be clothed in the surety-righteousness of my Redeemer;\nall that is mine put to his account, and all that he did and suffered,\nas the Mediator and surety of the covenant, to mine.\n\n \"I am afflicted with rheumatism, but God gives me patience,\ndisposes me to enumerate my many remaining mercies--eyes to read his\nword and ears to hear it preached; hitherto such moderation of pain as\nvery often to be able to attend with fixedness. I have my room at my\nown command, candle, fire, and attendance; and O, bless the Lord, my\nsoul, much of his sensible presence. In the night when my aches\nprevent me from sleeping, he gives me some sweet hymn; I sing, my pain\nis diverted, while my heart is melted and warmed under the\nexpressions, and I often drop asleep with the words on my tongue.\n\n \"I am convinced that the provision I have laid in for my last\njourney in the wilderness and through Jordan, is selected by the\ninfluence of the Holy Ghost. He takes of the things of Christ and\nshows them unto me; and while he keeps upon my mind my meanness, my\nvileness, wrings my heart with the retrospect of my backslidings and\nhighly aggravated transgressions, he opens at the same time the leaves\nof the New Testament and shows me my deliverance from punishment, the\nredemption of my soul, and my translation into the kingdom of God's\ndear Son: I weep and rejoice; I loathe myself, and clasping my Saviour\nto my heart, am at a loss for words to express how precious he is to\nmy saved soul.\n\n \"Jesus, I love thy charming name,\n 'Tis music to my ear;\n Fain would I sound it out so loud\n That heaven and earth should hear.\n\n Yes, thou art precious to my soul,\n My transport and my trust,\n My Saviour, Shepherd, Husband, Friend,\n No other good I boast.\n\n All my capacious powers can wish,\n In thee doth richly meet;\n Not to mine eyes is light so dear.\n Nor friendship's self so sweet.\n\n Thy grace shall dwell upon my heart\n And shed its fragrance there,\n The noblest balm of all my wounds,\n And cordial of my care.\n\n I'll speak the honors of thy name\n While I have life and breath;\n Then, speechless, clasp thee in my arms,\n The antidote of death.'\n\n \"Dr. M---- preached in the evening from Eph. 3:30: 'For we are\nmembers of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.' It was a rich\nsermon; I enjoyed it at the time, but cannot recall it. Blessed\nSpirit, keep it for me, and feed me with the substance of it, as I\nstand in need.\n\n \"Accept of my thanks, blessed Jesus; that through thy meritorious\nlife and death, I have an interest in the great whole. Accept of my\nthanks, blessed Spirit, for thus taking the things of Christ and\nshowing them unto me. And accept of my thanks, Father of mercies, for\nthe gift of thy Son, and all these blessings in him.\n\n \"'Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who\nhath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places, in\nChrist Jesus.' Amen.\"\n\n\n \"GREENWICH, Sabbath.\n\n \"Heard Dr. Milledoler preach in the state prison to the convicts,\nfrom Luke 19:10: 'For the Son of man is come to seek and save that\nwhich was lost.' He addressed them as fellow-sinners, all being by\nnature lost and dependent on the same means for recovery.\n\n \"True, my heart accords. O Lord, thou knowest I stand in my own\nestimation a sinner, the chief of sinners. These have added to their\nsin against thee, breach against men, and are suffering the penalty.\n\n \"My sins have been chiefly, though far from exclusively, against\nGod, and with many aggravations. That I was born in a Christian land,\nof pious parents, who gave me religious instructions; brought up under\nfaithful, lively ministers, and in religious society; exposed to few\ntemptations but what arose from the corruptions of my own heart, are\naggravations, which, perhaps, many are mourning over, as heightening\nthe sin of unbelief in their unregenerated state. But the\naggravations--the painful remembrance of which mars my comfort and\ncovers me with shame and confusion even now, though I know that God is\npacified with me--are as far above these as the heavens are above the\nearth. For in that Christian land, under those Christian parents and\nfaithful pastors, while yet young and tender, I was enlightened,\ntasted of the heavenly gift, was made a partaker of the Holy Ghost,\ntasted of the good word of God and the power of the world to come. I\nwas taken from the fearful pit and miry clay; my feet set upon the\nrock, and a new song put into my mouth, even to the amount of, O\ndeath, where is thy sting?--of redeeming love, pardoning grace, new\ncovenant mercy, I had 'joy and peace in believing,' But forgetting my\nnatural character, the extreme volatility of my spirits, my taste for\ngayety; forgetting the danger of smothering the heavenly spark by\nindulging to the utmost bound of lawful pleasure; forgetting my\ncontinual need of fresh supplies of grace to preserve and feed that\nnew life which could not live on earthly food; forgetting the\ndeceitfulness of my heart, the injunctions of my Bible, I became cold,\nnegligent in the use of means, distant in prayer, lost enjoyment, and\nmy heart, naturally carnal and madly fond of pleasure, got entangled.\n'The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eye, and the pride of life'\nregained their power; other loves usurped the place of that Beloved\nwho had bought me with his blood, and betrothed me to himself; 'that\nwhich came into my mind was, that I would be as the families of the\ncountries, to serve wood and stone.' Blessed be his name, he said, 'It\nshall not be.' He brought me into the wilderness and pleaded with me,\ncaused me to pass under the rod, brought me again into the bond of\nthe covenant.\n\n \"O how often hast thou wrought with me, for thy name's sake. One\nself-willed step brought with it a train of consequences dangerous to\nspiritual life, filling even the path of duty with pits and snares,\ncutting me off from ordinances, pastor, parents, church, country, and\nChristian society; placing me at the same time in the midst of carnal\ndelights; and every thing in my natural temper and dispositions was\ncongenial to them. What saved me? What in heaven or earth could save\nme, but thy covenant? Truly thy covenant standeth fast; therefore I\nwas not lost in the vortex. But 'the Lord God, merciful and gracious,\nlong-suffering, and abundant in goodness and truth, forgiving\niniquity, transgression, and sin,' kept his eye upon me; many a time\ndid he stop up my path. O from how many delusions of my own seeking;\nhow many snares and nets of my own weaving; how many pits of my own\ndigging, hast thou delivered me, when wandering, bewildered, on\ntemptation's ground, in the cloudy dark day. How often hast thou\nsought me out; how often bound me up when broken, strengthened me when\nsick, and fed me with judgment, and very, very often, thou madest\nthyself known to me. I knew thy hand when it shook the rod, when it\narrested me on some mad career. I knew thy hedge, thy bar; saw not\nonly escapes, but my Deliverer: often paused, turned, and took fast\nhold of thy covenant. I had no afflictions in those days, but every\npleasure lawful to be enjoyed, and natural to the heart of woman; but\nno pastor, no church, no Christian society; yet God was there, my\nBible, my Doddridge, and other good books. And to my shame and\nconfusion this day, he was not, in the midst of all my idolatry, a\nbarren wilderness, nor a land of drought to me. I had many Sabbaths;\nliterally the Sabbath was a sign between my covenant God and me: ill\nspent it often was, but not with company; it was spent in retirement.\nThe Lord did not leave me so far as to give up the Sabbath to the\nworld. Though my heart was incrusted, and spiritual life scarcely\ndiscernible, sometimes the Lord met me, and strange to tell, not with\nthreatenings causing terror, but with compunction, melting, turning,\nand ere the day was over, manifestations of pardon, though not joy;\nfor I was grieved at my ingratitude.\n\n \"I did expect affliction long before it came, and my presumptuous\nheart calculated upon the fruit being the peaceable fruit of\nrighteousness, and to take away sin; but still I held my way, gadding\nabout, drinking the waters of Sihor and the rivers of Syria, and\neating the worldling's dainties. Oh, Oh, at last it came; yes, it\ncame. Thou didst cut off the desire of my eyes with a stroke, and with\nthat made the world a blank to me. But O the stately steps of thy\nprovidential mercy previous to that trying hour. O my God, I must ever\nwonder and stand amazed at thy exuberant grace. In consistence with\nthy covenant, thou mightest have struck me among these worldlings, in\nthat dry and barren land, where not one tongue could speak the\nlanguage of Canaan, nor bring forth from thy precious Bible the words\nof consolation to my wounded and bereaved spirit; richly had I merited\nthis; but never, no, never hast thou dealt with me as I sinned.\nThrough the whole of my life, from the time that the Lord called me\nout of darkness into his marvellous light--from the time that he first\nled me to the Saviour, and enabled me to take hold of his covenant,\nwanderer, backslider, transgressor, rebel, idolater, ingrate, and if\nthere be any name more expressively _vile_ and _abominable_,\nthat is mine. And from the hour of my birth, through the whole of this\nrefractory perverse life, 'the Lord, the Lord God, merciful and\ngracious, long-suffering, abundant in goodness and truth, forgiving\niniquity, transgression, and sin,' has been, and now is, thy\nname to me.\n\n \"No, ye strong-built walls, ye grated windows, ye gloomy cells,\nye confine no such sinner as I. And did the Lord take vengeance on my\ninventions? O no, _mercy_ preceded, _mercy_ accompanied\njudgment; yea, it was all mercy, not vengeance. He brought me and my\nidol out of that barren land, placed us under the breath of prayer,\namong a dear little society of Methodists; he laid us upon their\nspirits, and when the messenger Death was sent for my beloved, the\nbreath of prayer ascended from his bedside, from their little meeting,\nand I believe from their families and closets. The God of mercy\nprepared their hearts to pray, and his ear to hear, and the answer did\nnot tarry. Behold, my husband prayeth; confesses sin; applies to the\nSaviour; pleads for forgiveness for his sake; receives comfort;\nblesses God for Jesus Christ, and dies with these words on his tongue,\n'I hold fast by the Saviour,' Behold another wonder; the idolatress in\nan ecstasy of joy. She who never could realize a separation for one\nsingle minute during his life, now resigns her heart's treasure with\npraise and thanksgiving.\n\n \"O the joy of that hour; its savor remains on my heart to this\nmoment. For five days and nights I had been little off my knees: it\nwas my ordinary posture at his bedside, and in all that time I had but\n_once_ requested life. Surely the spirit of prayer and supplication\nwas poured out. The Spirit helped mine infirmities with groanings\nwhich could not be uttered, leading me to pray for that which God had\ndetermined to bestow; making intercession for my husband, according\nto the will of God.\n\n \"O sing unto the Lord a new song, for he hath done marvellous\nthings. His right hand and his holy arm hath gotten him the victory.\nThe Lord hath made known his salvation. His righteousness hath he\nopenly shown in the sight of the heathen. He hath remembered his mercy\nand his truth toward the house of Israel. All the ends of the earth\nhave seen the salvation of our God.\" Psalm 98.\n\n\n \"FRIDAY, December.\n\n \"Sermon from John 4:10: 'If thou knewest the gift of God, and who\nit is that saith, Give me to drink, thou wouldest have asked of him,\nand he would have given thee living water,'\n\n \"This is part of my provision laid in for my passage through\nJordan. Christ is the gift of God. Christ is the water of life; he is\nthis living water, and the bread of life _given_; given by God,\nreceived by the sinner. Life and comfort are experienced, and fruit\nproduced is the evidence; but first of all, this gift must be known,\nand the soul's need must be known; Christ, the anointed prophet,\ntaught this woman both, and no other could. 'Search me, O Lord, and\ntry me.' Hast thou not taught my soul its miserable and ruined state\nby nature; its helplessness as well as misery? Hast thou not also\nbrought me to this living, life-giving water? Oh, hast thou not given\nme faith to come, faith to drink; and have I not experienced its\nsolacing quality? Has it not satisfied my soul, and in some degree\nallayed my thirst for carnal delights? Blessed Spirit, the gift of the\nFather and of the Son, pour into my soul repeated draughts of this\nliving water; yea, be in me, according to my Redeemer's promise, a\nwell of water springing up to eternal life, and cause me to bring\nforth fruit to the glory of the Father.\n\n \"'Other foundation can no man lay, than that which is laid,\nChrist Jesus.'\n\n \"Do I, O my God, seek for or desire any other foundation? Are not\nall my hopes for time and eternity built on this foundation? Is not\nChrist all my salvation and all my desire? Do I not embrace thy\ncovenant just as it is, believing that thou givest unto me eternal\nlife, and that this life is in thy Son, whom thou hast given 'to be a\ncovenant of the people.' Iniquities prevail against me; but thou wilt\nnot only purge them away, but wilt subdue them. Sin shall not have\ndominion over me, for I am not tinder the law, but under grace.\"\n\n\n To Miss Walker, Edinburgh.\n\n \"NEW YORK, 1812.\n\n \"My dear Miss Walker, I think, is in my debt; but that is no\nreason why I may not inquire after her health and welfare, and through\nher, of that of her brother, sister, and other dear friends yet in\ntheir pilgrimage. My dear, dear Mrs. Walker lives in my affections,\nand surely what concerns her children can never be to me a matter of\nindifference. Your dear brother's persevering kindness and tried\nfriendship have written gratitude in indelible characters on my heart.\n'A friend in need is a friend indeed;' and such was he. I trust the\nLord has rewarded and will reward him. I have still in my possession\nmany dear remembrances of your worthy mother; her sensible, pious\nletters, some of which have proved prophetic, are among my treasures.\nWhat a lovely group presses upon my memory at this moment, united to\nJesus and to one another on earth, and the union is now perfected in\nheaven. Your dear mother, Mrs. Brown, dear Mrs. Randall, and Lady\nGlenorchy, all zealous for the welfare of the widow and orphans, whose\nway lay peculiarly through Vanity Fair, and whose spirits were too\nmuch assimilated to the wares there exhibited, and most unworthy of\nall the care and pains they bestowed upon her. Tell my then dear\npastor the pilgrim is not lost; he will find her in the 18th chapter\nof Ezekiel: he may remember that he and dear Doctor Erskine gave me\nover to the Lord when leaving Edinburgh. Well has he kept the charge,\nthough I have not my part, after all the chastisements and charges\nreceived. But he is 'the Lord, the Lord God, merciful and gracious,\nlong-suffering, and abundant in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for\nthousands, forgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin.'\n\n \"I am now a happy Mary, enjoying the full sense of pardon and the\nlight of his countenance in the meantime, and the full prospect of\nbeing soon with him, made like him, and capacitated to praise him.\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH, January 18.\n\n \"Dr. R----. 'By grace ye are saved through faith; and that not of\nyourselves: it is the gift of God.'\n\n \"All is of grace, all is free gift, or we wicked, wretched\nsinners, could have no interest in it. Thanks be unto God for his\nunspeakable gift of Jesus Christ, given for a covenant of the people.\nThanks be unto God for the gift of faith, by which we apprehend this\ncovenant, and become interested in him, as the salvation of our souls.\nThanks be unto God for life to work; for new principles and new\nmotives, new desires, new hopes, new fears, and, in some measure, new\nconduct. All of grace, and to the God of grace be all the glory.\n\n \"Afternoon. 'Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither\nlet the mighty man glory in his might; let not the rich man glory in\nhis riches: but let him that glorieth, glory in this, that he\nunderstandeth and knoweth me; that I am the Lord which exercise\nrighteousness, loving-kindness, and judgment in the earth: for in\nthese things I delight, saith the Lord.' Jer. 9:23.\n\n \"O Lord, hast thou not taught me by thy word, by observation, and\nby experience, that 'all flesh is grass, and all the glory of man as\nthe flower of grass?' Alas, how much have I gloried in even more\nworthless and transient things; but thou hast put a worm in them,\nwhich I hope has cut the roots, and they are in a dying state. O let\ngrace supplant them; let me now glory only in thee and thy blessed,\ngracious, and well-ordered covenant. Do I understand and know thee,\nthat thou art the Lord which exerciseth righteousness,\nloving-kindness, and judgment in the earth? Dare I say that I, worm\nas I am, and a sinful worm, am the subject of this loving-kindness,\nthrough the righteousness of Christ? Yes, I dare, by the constitution\nof thine own covenant--the Covenant of the people, the Mediator, the\nguarantee of the covenant of grace, which is all summed up in him.\n\n \"When thou givest Christ, thou givest freely all the blessings of\nthe new covenant.\n\n \"'And this is the record, That God hath given to us eternal life,\nand this life is in his Son.'\n\n \"I believe the record, and do understand and know that thou art\nthe Lord, etc.\"\n\n\n \"FEBRUARY 4, 1813.\n\n \"My dear grandchildren J. and I. B---- waited on their beloved\npastor Dr. Romeyn, and professed their faith in the Lord Jesus Christ\nas the Saviour of sinners and their Saviour, their desire to give\nthemselves to the Lord and to his church, and to be in all things\ngoverned by it; to receive the seal of the covenant of grace,\ncommemorate the dying love of their Redeemer the next opportunity, and\nswear allegiance to him over the symbols of his body and blood.\n\n \"Glory to God for this fresh manifestation of his mercy and grace\nto sinners. Not unto us, O Lord God, but to thy name be the glory.\nThou hast made a covenant with thy chosen, and with believers in him;\nand thou hast, by thy Holy Spirit, drawn them to take hold of this thy\nown covenant, and to give themselves to thee to be made the subjects\nof it. And now, O Lord, remember thy own covenant, and do as thou hast\nsaid: Put thy laws in their minds, and write them in their hearts, and\nbe unto them a God, and they shall be unto thee a people; be merciful\nto their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities remember\nno more. Give them understanding to know and believe thy laws,\nmemories to retain them, hearts to love them, consciences to recognize\nthem, courage to profess and power to put in practice. O, grant that\nthe whole habit and frame of their souls may be a table and transcript\nof thy law. Blessed Redeemer, gather these lambs in thy arms and carry\nthem in thy bosom. O, seal them with the Holy Spirit of promise. They\nlook forward to that feast of love which thou didst institute in that\nsame night in which thou wast betrayed into the hands of sinners. If\nit may please thee, manifest thyself to them as thou dost not unto the\nworld. Blessed Shepherd, call these lambs by name; may they know thy\nvoice, rejoice to hear it, and follow thee. In all the preparatory\nexercises speak to their hearts and commune with them in secret. O\ngive them some love-tokens, which they may never forget; and make\nthyself known to them in the breaking of bread. Exercise their parents\nwith thankfulness and gratitude, and thine aged servant, to whom, in\nan especial manner, belong 'shame and confusion of face,' while she\nstands amazed at the stately steps of thy free, sovereign mercy and\ngrace to her, and to her children according to the flesh. Husband of\nthe widow, Father of the fatherless, Shield of the stranger, glorify\nthy name, magnify thy grace: all these thou hast been to me; give\nthese parents deep humility, if they have received grace to be more\nfaithful than I; yet thy holy eye has seen much shortcoming in them\nalso. Glory to thy name for the grace in which they stand, and that\nthou hast enabled them to train up these children for thee. Oh, let\nthis be a heart-searching time with us all; humble us, and exalt thy\nname, and magnify thy grace.\n\n \"O Lord, my covenant God, all my desire is before thee; is it not\nthat thou magnify thy grace in me and in my family? There are others,\nLord, and the residue of the Spirit is with thee. Put forth thy power\nin the heart of I.G. S----, and compel him to come in. And Oh, my dear\nI. S---- and her family; thou biddest me open my mouth wide. Lord, see,\nthere is much for thee to do. I praise thy name for what thou hast\ndone, and lay me at thy feet waiting for further manifestations of thy\nmercy, thy sovereign mercy: I have no other plea.\n\n \"Work with us, for thy name's sake, and with J. M----, for whom\nmy worthless prayers have been presented to thee, as also a member of\nthis family. O Lord, he is now gone out into the world; he is no\nlonger under the control of man; bring him under thy gracious control;\ncall him into thy kingdom of grace, and make him a willing subject in\nthe day of thy power. Father, glorify thy name.\"\n\n\n \"APRIL, Sabbath, 1813.\n\n \"'Wherefore, laying aside all malice, and all guile, and\nhypocrisies, and envyings, and all evil speaking, as new-born babes\ndesire the sincere milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby.' 2\nPeter, 2:1, 2.\n\n \"Blessed Spirit, thou hast convinced me of the indwelling of\nevery one of these, and also of my helplessness of myself to make\nsuccessful war against them. But Oh, hast thou not led me to the\nCaptain of salvation for armor, for strength, for wisdom, for power;\nand is not my dependence for success on thy promise that sin shall not\nhave dominion over me; that thy grace is sufficient for me; that as my\nday, so shall my strength be?\"\n\n\n \"MAY 5.\n\n \"'Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God,\nthrough our Lord Jesus Christ.' Rom. 5:1.\n\n \"Blessed, blessed, blessed doctrine; by no other doctrine can I\nbe justified and saved. Christ the gift of God, and faith the gift of\nGod. All, all is of grace.\n\n \"I have shut my door, desiring to commune with God, but feeling\ndull and lifeless, ask what shall I read? My Bible lies just at hand;\nwhere shall I read? every part is good. I open and find it marked: 'My\nprayer is unto thee, O Lord, in an acceptable time; O God, in the\nmultitude of thy mercy hear me, in the truth of thy salvation.' Psalm\n69:13. In an acceptable time--when? 'To-day if ye will hear his\nvoice.' Nevertheless, I am continually with thee; thou holdest me by\nmy right hand, and ever upholdest me, in the time of need especially.\n\n \"'In the multitude of thy mercy hear me, in the truth of thy\nsalvation.' What is the truth of God's salvation? To be the property\nof Christ by purchase, to have Christ made our property by the\nFather's gift; to have the Holy Spirit sent into our hearts, to\nenlighten our understandings, to govern our wills, to regulate our\naffections and tempers, and to be in us 'a well of water springing up\ninto everlasting life.' Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, ours by gift and\nby power; this. Oh, this contains all my asking for myself, for my\nchildren and children's children, for nay friends and all dear to me.\nTake us, O Lord, and in 'the truth of thy salvation' give thyself to\nus; do all the needful for us, and glorify thy name.\"\n\n\n \"SABBATH.\n\n \"'A certain man made a great supper, and bade many, and sent his\nservants at supper-time to say to them that were bidden, Come, for all\nthings are ready. And they all, with one consent, began to make\nexcuse.' Luke 14:16.\n\n \"Alas, such are our hearts, that we make idols even of the\nblessings and bounties of providence; no room is left for Christ,\nthough without him every temporal good is under a curse, and our own\npersons also.\n\n \"O Lord, bless the gracious invitations given to perishing\nsinners this day; the pathetic and tender remonstrances of thy\nfaithful servant. O, may many of the poor, the maimed, the halt, the\nblind, from the streets and lanes of the city, and may many from the\nhighways and hedges, be compelled to come, that thy house may be\nfilled. And Oh, my gracious Father, let these careless ones, who are\nmy flesh and blood, be among the number. Hear, O hear the prayers\noffered this day for poor, self-deluded, self-destroying sinners;\nawaken them, O Lord, and sweep away all lying refuges, and, gracious\nGod, settle and establish these halters. O bring to the birth, and\ngive life and love and zeal to make a full profession to the glory of\nthy powerful grace, and to the joy and comfort of fellow-members. Let\nthy kingdom come.\"\n\n\n \"GREENWICH, June 11, 1813.\n\n \"In my large light closet, within my airy, comfortable room; the\nprospect from my windows such as I have ever delighted in, woods and\nwater, flower-garden and fruit-trees, and beautiful shrubs of various\nkinds, all as much mine as if my own individual property by the laws\nof the land in which I live; surrounded with books, and my children's\nrich library at my command; enjoying rich gospel ordinances, under a\ngodly, gifted pastor, with pious, loving, sensible church-members; a\ncarriage to convey me, Sabbath and week-days, to places of worship;\nchildren whose desire is that I may enjoy all these to the full\nwithout care or trouble, they caring for me; with all these a large\nmeasure of health, my eyes see my teachers, my ears hear their voice.\nWhy then these tears? Are they all for sin? Lord, search and see. Does\nno wounded pride, no selfish hurt mix? Ah, Lord, thou knowest. I have\ndetected much, and mourn and weep on that account; but I fear there is\nyet much lurking and working that I know not.\n\n \"I have set apart the remainder of this day for fasting and\nhumiliation on account of past sins which I already know, and for yet\nfurther search into what I know not of at present. Lord, give me\nheart-searching exercises. Glory, glory, glory to Father, Son, and\nblessed Comforter, that I am forgiven; thy Spirit witnesseth with my\nspirit that I am forgiven. Thou hast given me faith in the truth of\nthy testimony, that the blood of Christ cleanseth from all sin--that\nthis is thy own provision for sinners--that Christ died for the\nungodly--that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us--that\nChrist hath loved us, and given himself for us--that 'God so loved the\nworld that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in\nhim should not perish, but have everlasting life.' These last words\ncame from thy own lips of flesh. Thou gift of God to a perishing\nworld, and to me, one of the most guilty in it, thou also saidst, 'He\nthat believeth on the Son hath everlasting life.' Thy Spirit\nwitnesseth with my spirit, that to me it is given on the behalf of\nChrist to believe in him. Phil. 1:29. Therefore I have everlasting\nlife. Him who was slain and hanged on a tree, 'Him hath God exalted to\nbe a Prince and a Saviour, for to give repentance and remission of\nsins.' From this exalted Prince I have repentance and forgiveness of\nsin, and therefore I dare look at my sins: I look with grief, but not\nwith terror. Though forgiven, and though provision is made for\nforgiveness, sin is still an evil and a bitter thing.\n\n \"This day is set apart for mourning. I desire to search, to know\nmore of my vileness, that I may mourn yet more; that while my heart is\nwrung for my ingratitude, the Lord may make it the means of crucifying\nmy sins, especially that which so easily besets me, that he will give\nme the prayer of faith that they may be forgiven, and that I may be\ndelivered from their power in my heart; that I may be clothed with\nhumility, so humble that nothing can hurt me, wearing my Redeemer's\nyoke, leaning upon him who was 'meek and lowly,' that I may find rest\nto my soul. Now, Lord, assist me for the rest of the day\" and let\nto-morrow be the beginning of days.\"\n\n\n \"Ten o'clock at night.\n\n \"The day is spent, and I look for the blessing. It has not been\nspent so much in my usual way of retracing, confessing, and bewailing,\nbut with Owen on the subject of indwelling sin, of purification and\nthe, means appointed by God. The blood of Christ is the only effectual\nmeans not only as atonement for sin, setting us free from\ncondemnation, but also for cleansing, as sprinkled on the conscience\nby the Holy Ghost, and purging it from dead works. There are means in\nwhich we are to exercise ourselves, depending on the Spirit for\nbenefit. We are to work in the faith that God works in us.\nMortification is one means, and though the mortification of the body\nis perhaps one of the lowest, I think it is of divine appointment,\ntherefore not to be neglected. I have been also studying the death of\nChrist, and his previous sufferings; the unbelief, the opposition,\ncontradiction, contempt, and cruel mocking which he endured; and his\nmeekness, patience, and submission under them; healing Malchus' ear,\npraying for his murderers; that, as the children of Israel were healed\nby looking to the brazen serpent, I may be healed by looking unto the\nuplifted Jesus; the Spirit producing the effect. And as the woman with\nthe bloody issue was healed by a touch, exercising faith in the power\nof Christ, so I may be healed by a look, exercising the same faith,\nthe Spirit producing the effect of conformity to his example, working\nin me that meek and lowly spirit for which I have been praying. And\nnow, by grace communicated, I hope to watch over my spirit with more\nsuccess than formerly. I wait for thy salvation.\"\n\n\n The following letter shows how Mrs. Graham persevered in her\nendeavors to guide and benefit immortal souls as long as God gave her\npowers to be employed.\n\n To Mrs. J. W----.\n\n \"GREENWICH, 1814.\n\n \"Did not the dove, my dear J----, get into the ark? Yes, Noah put\nout his hand and pulled her in; both are types of Christ. He is the\nArk of safety from the flood of wrath that must overwhelm unbelievers.\n\n \"I know not, my dear, the amount of that over which you mourn\nwith so much agony; I know not even if it be sinful, except in the\ncircumstances; you are conscious of sincerity, and you do not now wish\nto draw back. We can, my dear, do nothing in our own strength; no, not\nso much as think a good thought. To make any resolution without\ndependence on God for strength to perform, is sinful; to make any vow\nwithout a consciousness of our weakness and dependence on God for\nstrength to perform, is an aggravation of the evil.\n\n \"I suppose my J---- has sinned; what then? If any man say he has\nno sin, he deceives himself, and the truth is not in him. And if you\nsuppose that your sin in this is greater than many other sins with\ntheir aggravations, you judge wrong. I think that any one\n_deliberate_ sin, wilfully committed with a knowledge that it is\nsin, is greater than yours in such circumstances. You are bound by\nyour vow, and God will enable you to perform it. Turn, my dear, to the\nsecond chapter of the Acts of the Apostles, where Peter preaches to\nthe very murderers of our blessed Saviour, and charges the guilt upon\nthem, verse twenty-second; and again in verse thirty-sixth, 'Therefore\nlet all the house of Israel know assuredly, that this same Jesus whom\nye crucified, God hath made both Lord and Christ; and when they heard\nthis, they were pricked in their hearts.' Read on, my dear; Peter\nexhorts even them to repent and be baptized in the name of Christ, for\nthe remission of sins. I make no doubt but many have made vows in a\nrash manner; but, so far as I know, you have vowed only to serve the\nLord; this you are bound to do with or without a vow; and if the Lord\nmakes this vow the means of keeping you watchful and humble, and firm\nin avoiding what you have vowed against, it will, by his overruling\nSpirit, prove a blessing.\n\n \"You 'do not know where to look for comfort!' To, Jesus, my dear;\nnot to yourself, nor to any creature. 'Look unto me and be ye saved,\nall the ends of the earth: for I am God, and there is none else.' Isa.\n45:22. 'O Israel, thou hast destroyed thyself, but in me is thy help.'\nHosea 13:9; chap. 14. Take a view, my dear, of the character of God in\nhis dealings with his perverse Israel, after they had made the molten\ncalf, and sinned otherwise grievously against God. He, at the\nintercession of Moses, forgave their sin, and proclaimed that\nwonderful name, which to this day is the encouragement of convicted\nsinners, and mine in particular. And the Lord passed by him (Moses)\nand proclaimed, 'The Lord, the Lord God, merciful and gracious,\nlong-suffering, abundant in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for\nthousands, forgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin.' And how can\nGod do this, whose law is, as himself, immutable; and who adds 'that\nhe will by no means clear the guilty?' Exodus 34:6. Look now to the\nfifty-third chapter of Isaiah, where you will find your Redeemer\nstanding in your stead. In the thirtieth chapter is another amazing\ndisplay of God's forgiveness. The prophet begins the chapter with,\n'Woe to the rebellious children!' and lays grievous things to their\ncharge till you come to the eighteenth verse, where he says,\n'Therefore will the Lord wait, that he may be gracious to you;\ntherefore will he be exalted, that he may have mercy upon you; for the\nLord is a God of judgment, blessed are all they that wait for him.'\nOnce more look at the proclamation, Jeremiah 3:12. God has provided a\nsacrifice of sufficient value to atone for our most aggravated\ntransgressions, and a righteousness answerable to the uttermost extent\nof his holy law. Both are made over to the sinner by free gift. 'He\nhath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin, that we might be made\nthe righteousness of God in him.' 2 Cor. 5:21. _In Him_--He, our\nsurety, having fulfilled all righteousness for us, _as_ our\nsurety and representative.\n\n \"You fear that it is not the hand of the Lord that is upon you. I\ndo think that it is, my J----. It is the peculiar office of the Spirit\nto convince of sin, and I do think that he is at this time dealing\nwith your soul. But why look so much at your vow? you have sinned, my\nJ----, in heart, lip, and life. 'Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with\nall thy heart.' O my J----, what prostituted affections, what misspent\ntime. While God says, 'Whether you eat or drink, or whatsoever you do,\ndo all to the glory of God,' what self-indulgence and self-will,\ninstead of self-denial. Listen to the voice of convictions, listen to\nit as the voice of mercy, leading you to Christ the great propitiatory\nsacrifice, 'the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world.'\n\n \"Go to Christ, my dear, as a sinner; tell him you commit your\nsinful soul into his hands; say, Thou hast bid me look unto thee and\nbe saved. Saviour, I do look unto thee for salvation. Wash me in thy\nblood, clothe me in thy righteousness, sanctify me by thy grace,\naccept of me as thy pardoned, saved child; and be a surety for me for\ngood, that having vowed to thee that I would be thy servant, I may\nperform my vow; furnish me with both will and power to devote myself\nto thee every day of my life.\n\n \"Try, my dear, to rest on Christ; put your trust in him; if you\ndo he will not disappoint you; as your faith, so shall it be unto you.\nNow faith is a saving grace; thereby we receive and rest upon Christ\nfor salvation, as he is offered to us in the gospel. Do as you have\nsaid: wait his appointed time, in the use of means, till he manifest\nhimself to you. I am hurried for time to get this to town. Farewell. I\nwill pray for you.\n\n \"I. GRAHAM.\"\n\n\n \"1814.\n\n \"'A day of darkness and gloominess, a day of clouds and thick\ndarkness, as the morning spread upon the mountains.' Joel 2:2.\n\n \"Not in temporals, nor in the means of grace; every thing that\nearth can afford is gathered into my present cup; it is full and runs\nover with earthly good, and a large measure of health to enjoy it.\nMoral temporals are also mine in no common degree, friendship, society\nat my choice, and respectability in it. Rich means of grace within my\nreach, my Bible, and books of every kind and great variety at my hand,\nof instruction and of devotion. Mine eyes see my teachers, and my\njudgment approves their doctrine as corresponding with that sure word\nof testimony given me as the test of all human writings. Yet it is a\nday of darkness and of gloom.\n\n \"'Who is among you that feareth the Lord, that obeyeth the voice\nof his servant, that walketh in darkness and hath no light? Let him\ntrust in the name of the Lord and stay upon his God.' Isa. 50:10.\n\n \"To trust in the name of the Lord and to stay myself upon my God\nis still my privilege, and though with little life and little comfort,\nmy experience. My mind is so desultory! My Bible, and helps derived\nfrom men's deductions and experiences, seem useless; they are not\nblessed as means to fix my heart; trifles of every sort pass and\nrepass often; while my eyes read the words, my mind is gone in a dream\non some other subject; my heart remains unimpressed, my mind\nuninformed; the same in prayer, especially in secret and in the\nfamily; less so in the sanctuary.\n\n \"I seem, as to apprehension, left to my own dark, dismal, carnal\nself; naked faith on the finished work of my Redeemer is all that\nsupports me; and that as a bare preventive of fear and source of a\nhope that 'I shall yet praise Him who is the health of my countenance\nand my God.' I know his covenant stands fast, I have taken hold of it;\nI do at this cold and stupid moment place my confidence in it. Christ\nis God's covenant, God's gift to sinners; I believe it; he is the Lamb\nof God, which taketh away the sin of the world; I believe it; I\nbelieve on the Son for all the purposes for which God has sent him\ninto the world; therefore I have everlasting life; I believe the\nrecord that God gave of his Son; that God hath given to me eternal\nlife, and this life is in his Son, not in me, but in union with him.\n'He that hath the Son hath life; he that hath not the Son, hath\nnot life.' John 5.\n\n \"I thank thee, my God, that thou hast not left me to cast away my\nconfidence in Christ. I have life in him, and no life but as I have it\nfrom him. Thou seest how it is with me. Thou art my reconciled Father\nin Christ, but thou hast shut me out from thy presence. I do not enjoy\nthee; my poor heart is tossed from trifle to trifle. It has been my\nway through life to destroy myself, and thy way to deliver me. Thou\nhast been very gracious to me in my old age. I have enjoyed much of\nthy presence in thy sanctuary and in my private hours; and although\nsin has dwelt and does dwell in me, I have enjoyed thy forgiving\ngrace, and have tasted thy love, far beyond what I have for weeks\npast. 'Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my\nthoughts; and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the\nway everlasting.' Show me wherefore thou contendest with me. Am I\nliving in the indulgence of any known wilful sin; or in the habitual\nneglect of any known duty? Lord, 'it is not in man that walketh to\ndirect his steps.' I know I have been unthankful, unwatchful, idle;\nalas, this is my ordinary course; but it is not the ordinary course of\nmy Lord God, merciful and gracious, to mark iniquity against me, but\nto forgive me daily, to lead me to the blood of sprinkling, to give me\ncontrition, and to restore me to his favor by giving me 'joy and peace\nin believing.' Help, Lord; give me heart-searching exercises. I read\nthy word, I set about that to which thou callest me. I set apart this\nday for fasting, but the gracious exercises are not in me. Come, O\ncome, and be with me. Exalted Prince, give repentance and remission;\nin thy light let me see light.\n\n \"'Therefore now turn ye unto me with all your heart, with\nfasting, with weeping and mourning; rend your heart and not your\ngarments, turn unto the Lord your God; for he is gracious and\nmerciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of\nthe evil.' Joel 2:12. O, do I not know thee by this name; has it not\nbeen thy name to me throughout this wide wilderness, 'pardoning\niniquity, transgression, and sin?' Thou hast prepared a prayer for me,\n'Turn me, and I shall be turned, for thou art the Lord my God.' Jer.\n31:18. I look to thy new covenant in the same chapter; it is all\npromise, I can do nothing in it. Christ by thine own appointment\nanswers for my part; or rather, I have no part. I can render nothing\nto the Lord for all his benefits to me. I will put forth the withered\nhand to 'take the cup of salvation, and call on the name of the Lord.'\n\n \"Ten o'clock. The day is spent; I have confessed, and endeavored\nto turn to the Lord with mourning, but with little sensibility.\n\n \"I attended meeting in the evening, heard two excellent\ndiscourses on the priesthood of Christ, and joined in two prayers and\nthree hymns with more fixed attention than has been my attainment\nlately; for this I thank thee, my God. Many have been the beginnings\nof days and of months which thou hast afforded after backsliding. O\nadd this to the number. 'Hear my prayer, O Lord; give ear to my\nsupplications; in thy faithfulness answer me, and in thy\nrighteousness. Enter not into judgment with thy servant, for in thy\nsight shall no man living be justified.' Psalm 143.\n\n \"My spirit is overwhelmed within me, my heart within me is\ndesolate. I stretch out my hands unto thee; my soul thirsteth after\nthee in a thirsty land. Hear me speedily, O Lord; my spirit faileth;\nhide not thy face from me, lest I be like unto those that go down into\nthe pit. Cause me to hear thy loving-kindness in the morning, for in\nthee do I trust; cause me to know the way wherein I should walk, for I\nlift up my soul unto thee. Deliver me, O Lord, from mine enemies; I\nflee unto thee to hide me. Teach me to do thy will, for thou art my\nGod. Thy Spirit is good; lead me into the land of uprightness. Quicken\nme, O Lord, for thy name's sake; for thy righteousness' sake bring my\nsoul out of trouble. I wait for thy salvation.\n\n This heart my Jesus bought with blood,\n It is his honest claim;\n O seize it, fix it, Saviour God,\n To give it is my aim.\n\n Take full possession of this heart,\n And here set up thy throne;\n Command each idol to depart,\n And make it all thine own.\n\n O dare I not to thee appeal,\n That 'tis my first desire,\n That on this heart thou stamp thy seal\n And grave it with love's fire?\n\n To fix this heart to stray no more\n I e'en would quit the clay;\n Would hasten on to Jordan's shore,\n And plough the watery way.\n\n Nor fear nor dread my soul should move,\n With Jesus in my heart;\n Each passion swallowed up in love,\n I'd court the friendly dart.\n\n The resurrection and the life\n In death itself he'll prove,\n And while he closes mortal strife,\n Breathe his own life of love.\n\n Then boast not, monster, of thy sting,\n Nor of thy victory, grave;\n In th' arms of God's anointed King\n I dare thy fiercest brave.\n\n\n\n\n CHAPTER XII.\n\n CLOSING LABORS FOR THE POOR--\n SICKNESS AND DEATH.\n\n During the last two years of her life, Mrs. Graham found her\nstrength inadequate to so extensive a course of visiting the poor as\nformerly; there were some distressed families, however, that\nexperienced her kind attentions to the last. She would occasionally\naccompany the Rev. Mr. Stanford on his visits to the state-prison,\nhospital, and to the Magdalen house. This gentleman was the stated\npreacher employed by \"the Society for the Support of the Gospel among\nthe Poor,\" and devoted his time to preaching in the almshouse,\nhospital, state-prison, debtors'-prison, etc., with great assiduity\nand acceptance.\n\n Mrs. Graham now spent much of her time in her room, devoted to\nmeditation, prayer, and reading the Scriptures; she seemed to be\nweaning from earth and preparing for heaven. Prayer was that sweet\nbreath of her soul which brought stability to her life. Genuine\nhumility was obvious in all her sentiments and deportment. Religious\nfriends prized her conversation, counsel, and friendship; sometimes\nthey would venture on a compliment to her superior attainments, but\nalways experienced a decided rebuke. To her friend Colonel L----, who\nexpressed a wish to be such a character as she was, she quickly\nreplied with an air of mingled pleasantry and censure, \"Get thee\nbehind me, Satan.\" To a female friend who said, \"If I were only sure\nat last of being admitted to a place at your feet I should feel\nhappy.\" \"Hush, hush,\" replied Mrs. Graham, \"There is ONE SAVIOUR.\"\nThus she was always careful to give her divine Redeemer the whole\nglory of her salvation.\n\n This example of humility, self-denial, and sensibility to the\nimperfection of her conduct, is the more to be valued, as it is so\ndifficult to be followed. Flattery is too commonly practised; and\nthere is no sufficient guard against its dangerous consequences,\nexcept a constant and humbling recognition of the spirituality of the\nlaw of God, and our lamentable deficiency in fulfilling it. Pride was\nnot made for man: \"I have seen an end of all perfection,\" said the\nPsalmist, \"but thy commandment is exceeding broad.\" It was by\ncherishing this sentiment, by studying her Bible, by searching her\nheart and its motives, and above all, by grace accorded of heaven in\nanswer to her prayers, that Mrs. Graham was enabled to maintain such\nmeekness of spirit, such an uniformity of Christian character\nthroughout her life. May all who read her history be directed to the\nsame sources of true peace and genuine happiness.\n\n In the spring of 1814 she was requested to unite with some ladies\nin forming a society for the promotion of industry among the poor.\nThis was the last act in which she appeared before the public. A\npetition, signed by about thirty ladies, was presented to the\ncorporation of New York, praying that they would assign them a\nbuilding in which work might be prepared and given out to the\nindustrious poor, who being paid for their labor, might be saved the\nnecessity of begging, and at the same time cherish habits of industry\nand self-respect. The corporation having returned a favorable answer,\nand provided a house, a meeting of the Society was held, and Mrs.\nGraham once more was called to the chair. It was the last time she was\nto preside at the formation of a new society. Her articulation, once\nstrong and clear, was now observed to have become more feeble. The\nladies present listened to her with affectionate attention; her voice\nbroke upon the ear as a pleasant sound that was passing away. She\nconsented to have her name inserted on the list of managers, and to\ngive what assistance her age would permit in forwarding so beneficent\na work. Although it pleased God that she should cease from her labors\nbefore the House of Industry was opened, yet the work was carried on\nby others and prospered. Between four and five hundred women were\nemployed and paid during the following winter. The corporation\ndeclared in strong terms their approbation of the result, and enlarged\ntheir donation, with a view to promote the same undertaking for the\nsucceeding winter.\n\n In the month of May, 1814, a report was received from Mr. Stephen\nPrust of Bristol, in England, of the Society for establishing\nAdult-schools. Mrs. Graham was so delighted with a perusal of it, as\nimmediately to undertake the formation of such a school in the village\nof Greenwich. She called on the young people who were at work in some\nneighboring manufactories, and requested them to attend her for this\npurpose every Sabbath morning at eight o'clock. This was kept up after\nher decease as a Sunday-school, and consisted of nearly eighty\nscholars. She was translated from this work of faith on earth, to\nengage in the sublimer work of praise in heaven.\n\n For some weeks previous to her last illness she was favored with\nunusual health and much enjoyment of religion; she appeared to have\nsweet exercises and communion in attending on all God's ordinances and\nappointed means of grace. She was also greatly refreshed in spirit by\nthe success of Missionary and Bible Societies, and used to speak with\nmuch affection of Mr. Gordon, Mr. Lee, Mr. May, and Dr. Morrison, with\nwhom she had been acquainted when in New York, on their way to\nmissionary stations in India and China.\n\n Mrs. Graham was very partial to the works of Dr. John Owen, Rev.\nWilliam Romaine, and Rev. John Newton, and read them with pleasure and\nprofit. One day she remarked to Mr. B----, that she preferred the\nancient writers on theology to the modern, because they dealt more in\nitalics. \"Dear mother,\" he replied, \"what religion can there be in\nitalics?\" \"You know,\" said she, \"that old writers expected credit for\nthe doctrines they taught, by proving them from the word of God to be\ncorrect: they inserted the scripture passages in italics, and their\nworks have been sometimes one-half in italics. Modern writers on\ntheology, on the contrary, give us a long train of reasoning to\npersuade us to their opinions, but very little in italics.\" This\nremark of hers has great force, and deserves the serious attention of\nthose who write and those who read on theological subjects.\n\n On the two Sabbaths preceding her last illness she joined in\ncommunion at the Lord's table. On the 10th of July, 1814, at\nGreenwich, and on the 17th at her own church in Cedar-street. On each\nweek preceding these seasons she attended three evenings on religious\nexercises; on Thursdays at the Orphan Asylum, on Friday evenings the\npreparation sermons, and on Saturday evenings at the prayer-meetings.\nShe appeared lively, and expressed comfort in those religious seasons,\nand continued actively useful until the very day on which her\nillness commenced.\n\n On the morning of the 17th she attended the Sabbath-school with\nher daughter and grandchildren. Thus the Lord was pleased to direct\nthat she should lead her children's children into the walks of\nusefulness before she took her flight to heaven, and impose a pleasing\nobligation on them that they should follow her steps. Of the same date\nis the last meditation in her diary.\n\n\n \"COMMUNION SABBATH, July 17, 1814.\n\n \"'Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him\nnot, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory:\nreceiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls,' 1\nPeter, 1:8, 9.\n\n \"I had requested to be brought to my Lord's banqueting-house, and\nto be feasted with love this day. I ate the bread and drank the wine,\nin the faith that I ate the flesh and drank the blood of the Son of\nman, and dwelt in him and he in me. Took a close view of my familiar\nfriend Death, accompanied with the presence of my Saviour, _his\nsensible presence_. I cannot look at it without this; it is my only\npetition concerning it. I have had desires relative to certain\ncircumstances, but they are nearly gone. It is my sincere desire that\nGod may be glorified, and he knows best how and by what circumstances.\nI retain my one petition,\n\n \"Only to me thy countenance show,\n I ask no more the Jordan through.\"\n\n Thus she arose from her Master's table, was called to gird on her\narmor for a combat with the king of terrors, and came off more than\nconqueror, through Him who loved her.\n\n On Monday she appeared in perfect health, and visited and gave\nreligious instruction to the orphans in the asylum.\n\n On Tuesday, the 19th of July, she complained of not feeling well,\nand kept her room; on Thursday her disorder proved to be a\ncholera-morbus, and her children sent for a physician. She thought\nthis attack was slighter than in former seasons. On Saturday, however,\nshe requested that Mrs. Chrystie might be sent for; this alarmed Mrs.\nB----, knowing there existed an understanding between those two\nfriends, that one should attend the dying-bed of the other, Mrs.\nChrystie was a very dear friend of Mrs. Graham. For upwards of\ntwenty-four years they had loved each other, feeling reciprocal\nsympathy in their joys and their sorrows; the hope of faith was the\nconsolation of both, and oftentimes it had been their delightful\nemployment to interchange their expressions of affection towards Him\nwhom having not seen, they loved, and in whom, though they saw him\nnot, yet believing on him, they rejoiced with joy unspeakable and full\nof glory. On Mrs. Chrystie's entering the chamber of her friend, Mrs.\nGraham welcomed her with a sweet expressive smile, seeming to say, \"I\nam going to get the start of you, I am called home before you; it will\nbe your office to fulfil our engagement.\" When she sat by her bedside,\nMrs. Graham said, \"Your face is very pleasant to me, my friend.\"\n\n During Saturday night, a lethargy appeared to be overpowering her\nframe. On Sabbath morning she was disposed to constant slumber;\nobserving Mr. B---- looking at her with agitation, she was roused from\nher heaviness, and stretching her arms towards him and embracing him,\nshe said, \"My dear, dear son, I am going to leave you; I am going to\nmy Saviour.\" \"I know,\" he replied, \"that when you do go from us, it\nwill be to the Saviour; but, my dear mother, it may not be the Lord's\ntime now to call you to himself.\" \"Yes,\" said she, \"now is the time;\nand Oh, I could weep for sin.\" Her words were accompanied with her\ntears. \"Have you any doubts, then, my dear friend?\" asked Mrs.\nChrystie. \"Oh no,\" replied Mrs. Graham; and looking at Mr. and Mrs.\nB---- as they wept, \"My dear children, I have no more doubt of going\nto my Saviour, than if I were already in his arms; my guilt is all\ntransferred; he has cancelled all I owed. Yet I could weep for sins\nagainst so good a God: it seems to me as if there must be weeping even\nin heaven for sin.\"\n\n After this she entered into conversation with her friends,\nmentioning portions of scripture and favorite hymns which had been\nsubjects of much comfort and joy to her. Some of these she had\ntranscribed into a little book, calling them her \"victuals\" prepared\nfor crossing over Jordan; she committed them to memory, and often\ncalled them to remembrance as her songs in the night when sleep had\ndeserted her. She then got Mr. B---- to read to her some of these\nportions, especially the eighty-second hymn of Newton's third book:\n\n \"Let us love, and sing, and wonder;\n Let us praise the Saviour's name:\n He has hushed the law's loud thunder,\n He has quenched mount Sinai's flame:\n He has washed us with his blood,\n He has brought us nigh to God,\" etc.\n\n Mrs. Graham then fell asleep, nor did she awaken until the voice\nof the Rev. Dr. Mason roused her. They had a very affectionate\ninterview, which he has partly described in the excellent sermon he\ndelivered after her decease. She expressed to him her hope as founded\naltogether on the redemption that is in Jesus Christ: were she left to\ndepend on the merit of the best action she had ever performed, that\nwould be only a source of despair. She repeated to him, as her view of\nsalvation, the fourth verse of the same hymn:\n\n \"Let us wonder: grace and justice\n Join, and point at mercy's store;\n When, through grace, in Christ our trust is,\n Justice smiles and asks no more;\n He who washed us with his blood,\n Has secured our way to God.\"\n\nHaving asked Dr. Mason to pray with her, he inquired\nif there was any particular request she had to\nmake of God by him; she replied, that God would\ndirect: then as he kneeled, she put up her hands, and\nraising her eyes towards heaven, breathed this short\nbut expressive petition, \"Lord, lead thy servant in\nprayer.\"\n\n After Dr. Mason had taken his leave, she again fell into a deep\nsleep. Her physicians still expressed a hope of her recovery, as her\npulse was regular and the violence of her disease had abated. One of\nthem, however, declared his opinion that his poor drugs would prove of\nlittle avail against her own ardent prayers to depart and be with\nChrist, which was far better for her than a return to a dying world.\n\n On Monday the Rev. Mr. Rowan prayed with her, and to him she\nexpressed also the tranquillity of her mind, and the steadfastness of\nher hope, through Christ, of eternal felicity.\n\n Her lethargy increased; at intervals from sleep she would\noccasionally assure her daughter, Mrs. B----, that all was well; and\nwhen she could rouse herself only to say one word at a time, that one\nword, accompanied with a smile, was, \"Peace.\" From her there was a\npeculiar emphasis in this expression of the state of her mind: \"Peace\nI leave with you, my peace I give unto you,\" had been a favorite\nportion of scripture with her, and a promise, the fulfilment of which\nwas her earnest prayer to the God who made it. She also occasionally\nasked Mr. B---- to pray with her, even when she could only articulate,\nas she looked at him, \"Pray.\" She was now surrounded by many of her\ndear Christian friends, who watched her dying-bed with affection and\nsolicitude. On Tuesday afternoon she slept with little intermission.\nThis, said Dr. Mason, may be truly called \"falling asleep in Jesus.\"\nIt was remarked by those who attended her, that all terror was taken\naway, and that death seemed here as an entrance into life. Her\ncountenance was placid, and looked younger than before her illness.\n\n At a quarter past twelve o'clock, being the morning of the 27th\nof July, 1814, her spirit gently winged its flight from a mansion of\nclay to the realms of glory, while around the precious remnant of\nearth her family and friends stood weeping, yet elevated by the scene\nthey were witnessing. After a silence of many minutes, they kneeled by\nher bed, adored the goodness and the grace of God towards his departed\nchild, and implored the divine blessing on both the branches of her\nfamily, as well as on all the Israel of God.\n\n Thus she departed in peace, not trusting in her wisdom or virtue,\nlike the philosophers of Greece and Rome; not even like Addison,\ncalling on the profligate to see a good man die; but like Howard,\nafraid that her good works might have a wrong place in the estimate of\nher hope, her chief glory was that of \"a sinner saved by grace.\"*\n\n*This was Howard's epitaph, dictated by himself.\n\n After such examples, who will dare to charge the doctrines of the\ncross of Christ with licentiousness? Here are two instances of\npersons, to whose good works the world have cheerfully borne\ntestimony, who lived and died in the profession of these doctrines. It\nwas faith that first purified their hearts, and so the stream of\naction from these fountains became pure also. Had not Christ died and\nrisen again, all the powers of man could never have produced such\nlives of benevolence, nor a death so full of contrition, yet so\nembalmed with hope. Hallelujah, \"unto Him who loved us, and washed us\nfrom our sins in his own blood, and hath made us kings and priests\nunto God and his Father: to him be glory and dominion, for ever and\never. Amen.\"\n\n At the next weekly prayer-meeting which she had usually attended,\nthe circumstances of her death were made subjects of improvement. On\nthe 16th of July she was a worshipper with her brethren and sisters\nthere, and on the evening of the 30th they were called to consider her\nby faith as in the immediate presence of her God, among \"the spirits\nof the just made perfect.\" The services of that evening were closed\nwith the following hymn from Dobell's collection, which is beautifully\ndescriptive of her happy change:\n\n \"'Tis finished! the conflict is past,\n The heaven-born spirit is fled;\n Her wish is accomplished at last,\n And now she's entombed with the dead.\n\n The months of affliction are o'er,\n The days and the nights of distress,\n We see her in anguish no more--\n She's gained her happy release.\n\n No sickness, or sorrow, or pain,\n Shall ever disquiet her now;\n For death to her spirit was gain,\n Since Christ was her life when below.\n\n Her soul has now taken its flight\n To mansions of glory above,\n To mingle with angels of light,\n And dwell in the kingdom of love.\n\n The victory now is obtained;\n She's gone her dear Saviour to see;\n Her wishes she fully has gained--\n She's now where she longed to be.\n\n The coffin, the shroud, and the grave\n To her were no objects of dread;\n On Him who is mighty to save,\n Her soul was with confidence stayed.\n\n Then let us forbear to complain,\n That she is now gone from our sight;\n We soon shall behold her again,\n With new and redoubled delight.\"\n\n Mrs. Graham's death created a strong sensation in the public\nmind. Magistrates of the city were careful to express their sense of\nthe public loss sustained, and many charitable institutions paid\naffectionate tributes to her memory. Several clergymen also made her\ndeath the subject of their discourses, among whom was her beloved\npastor, Dr. JOHN M. MASON, who, on Sabbath evening, Aug. 14, delivered\nthe well-known powerful sermon, \"CHRISTIAN MOURNING,\" from 1 Thess.\n4:13, 14: \"I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning\nthem which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have\nno hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so\nthem also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.\"\n\n Contrasting the consolations afforded to the Christian with the\ndarkness and doubt of the pagan or infidel; dwelling on the\nChristian's death as \"sleeping in Jesus;\" his immediate entrance into\nbliss, and his glorious resurrection and reigning with Christ in the\njudgment, he thus proceeds:\n\n \"In this faith the apostles labored and the martyrs bled. Ages\nhave elapsed and it is still the same. It is not a distant wonder; not\na brilliant vision; but a solid and present reality, under the power\nof which at this moment, while the words are on my lips, Christians,\nin various parts of the world, are closing their eyes to sleep in\nJesus. It has come home to our own business and bosoms. It has chosen\nour houses to be the scene of its miracles. But rarely does it fall to\nthe lot of human eyes to witness so high a display of its value and\nvirtue, as was witnessed in that blessed woman whose entrance into the\njoy of her Lord has occasioned our assembling this evening.\n\n \"As we are commanded to be followers of them who through faith\nand patience inherit the promises, we should have their example before\nus, that we may learn to imbibe their spirit, to imitate their graces,\nand be ready for their reward. With this view, permit me to lay before\nyou some brief recollections of our deceased friend.\n\n \"It is not my intention to relate the history of her life. That\nwill be a proper task for biography. I design merely to state a few\nleading facts, and to sketch such outlines of character as may show to\nthose who knew her not, what manner of person she was in all holy\nconversation and godliness. Those who knew her best require no such\nremembrancer, and will be able, from their own observation, to supply\nits defects.\n\n \"ISABELLA MARSHALL, known to us as Mrs. GRAHAM, received from\nnature qualities which, in circumstances favorable to their\ndevelopment, do not allow their possessor to pass through life\nunnoticed and inefficient.\n\n \"An intellect strong, prompt, and inquisitive--a temper open,\ngenerous, cheerful, ardent--a heart replete with tenderness, and alive\nto every social affection and every benevolent impulse--a spirit at\nonce enterprising and persevering--the whole crowned with that rare\nand inestimable endowment, good sense--were materials which required\nonly skilful management to fit her for adorning and dignifying any\nfemale station. With that sort of cultivation which the world most\nadmires, and those opportunities which attend upon rank and fortune,\nshe might have shone in the circles of the great without forfeiting\nthe esteem of the good. Or had her lot fallen among the literary\nunbelievers of the continent, she might have figured in the sphere of\nthe Voltaires, the Duffauds, and the other _esprits forts_ of\nParis. She might have been as gay in public, as dismal in private, and\nas wretched in her end, as any of the most distinguished among them\nfor their wit and their woe. But God had destined her for other scenes\nand services--scenes from which greatness turns away appalled, and\nservices which all the cohorts of infidel wit are unable to perform.\nShe was to be prepared by poverty, bereavement, and grief, to pity and\nto succor the poor, the bereaved, and the grieving. The sorrows of\nwidowhood were to teach her the heart of the widow--her babes,\ndeprived of their father, to open the springs of her compassion to the\nfatherless and orphan--and the consolations of God, her refuge and\nstrength, her very present help in trouble, to make her a daughter\nof consolation to them who were walking in the valley of the shadow\nof death.\n\n \"To train her betimes for the future dispensations of his\nprovidence, the Lord touched the heart of this chosen vessel in her\nearly youth. The spirit of prayer sanctified her infant lips, and\ntaught her, as far back as her memory could go, to pour out her heart\nbefore God. She had not reached her eleventh year when she selected a\nbush in the retirement of the field, and there devoted herself to her\nGod by faith in the Redeemer. The incidents of her education,\nthoughtless companions, the love of dress, and the dancing-school, as\nshe has herself recorded, chilled for a while the warmth of her piety,\nand robbed her bosom of its peace. But her gracious Lord revisited her\nwith his mercy, and bound her to himself in an everlasting covenant,\nwhich she sealed at his own table about the seventeenth year of\nher age.\n\n \"Having married, a few years after, Dr. John Graham, surgeon to\nthe 60th British regiment, she accompanied him first to Montreal, and\nshortly after to Fort Niagara. Here, during four years of temporal\nprosperity, she had no opportunity, even for once, of entering the\nhabitation of God's house, or hearing the sound of his gospel.\nSecluded from the waters of the sanctuary and all the public means of\ngrowth in grace, her religion began to languish and its leaf to droop.\nBut the root was perennial--it was of the seed of God, which liveth\nand abideth for ever. The Sabbath was still to her the sign of his\ncovenant. On that day of rest, with her Bible in her hand, she used to\nwander through the woods, renew her self-dedication, and pour out her\nprayer for the salvation of her husband and her children. He who\n'dwelleth not in temples made with hands,' heard her cry from the\nwilds of Niagara, and strengthened her with strength in her soul.\n\n \"By one of those vicissitudes which checker military life, the\nregiment was ordered to the island of Antigua in the West Indies. Here\nshe met with that exquisite enjoyment to which she had been long a\nstranger--the communion of kindred spirits in the love of Christ: and\nsoon did she need all the soothing and support which it is fitted to\nadminister; for in a very short time the husband of her youth, the\nobject of her most devoted affection, her sole earthly stay, was taken\nfrom her by death. The stroke was, indeed, mitigated by the sweet\nassurance that he slept in Jesus. But a heart like hers, convulsed by\na review of the past and anticipation of the future, would have burst\nwith agony, had she not known how to pour its sorrows into the bosom\nof her heavenly Father. Trials which beat sense and reason to the\nground, raise up the faith of the Christian, and draw her closer to\nher God. O, how divine to have him as the rock of our rest when every\nearthly reliance is a broken reed.\n\n \"Bowing to his mysterious dispensation, and committing herself to\nhis protection as the Father of the fatherless and the Husband of the\nwidow, she returns with her charge to her native land, to contract\nalliance with penury, and to live by faith for her daily bread. That\nsame grace under whose teaching she knew how to abound, taught her\nalso how to suffer need. With a dignity which belongs only to them who\nhave treasure in heaven, she descended to her humble cot, employment,\nand fare. But her humility, according to the Scripture, was the\nforerunner of her advancement. The light of her virtues shone\nbrightest in her obscurity, and pointed her way to the confidential\ntrust of forming the minds and manners of young females of different\nranks in the metropolis of Scotland. Here, respected by the great and\nbeloved by the good; in sacred intimacy with 'devout and honorable\nwomen,' and the friendship of men who were in truth servants of the\nmost high God, she continued in the successful discharge of her duties\ntill Providence conducted her to our shores.\n\n \"She long had a predilection for America, as a land in which,\naccording to her favorite opinion, the church of Christ is signally to\nflourish. Here she wished to end her days and leave her children. And\nwe shall remember with gratitude, that in granting her wish, God cast\nher lot with ourselves. Twenty-five years ago she opened in this city\na school for the education of young ladies, the benefits of which have\nbeen strongly felt, and will be long felt hereafter, in different and\ndistant parts of our country. Evidently devoted to the welfare of her\npupils--attentive to their peculiarities of character--happy in\ndiscovering the best avenue of approach to their minds--possessing in\na high degree the talent of simplifying her instruction and varying\nits form, she succeeded in that most difficult part of a teacher's\nwork, the inducing youth to take an interest in their own improvement,\nand to educate themselves by exerting their own faculties.\n\n \"In governing her little empire, she acted upon those principles\nwhich are the basis of all good government, on every scale and under\nevery modification--to be reasonable, to be firm, and to be uniform.\nHer authority was both tempered and strengthened by condescension. It\ncommanded respect while it conciliated affection. Her word was law,\nbut it was the law of kindness. It spoke to the conscience, but it\nspoke to the heart; and obedience bowed with the knee of love. She did\nnot, however, imagine her work to be perfected in fitting her eleves\nfor duties and elegance of life. Never did she forget their immortal\nnature. Utterly devoid of sectarian narrowness, she labored to infuse\ninto their minds those vital principles of evangelical piety which\nform the common distinction of the disciples of Christ, the peculiar\nglory of the female name, and the surest pledge of domestic bliss. Her\nvoice, her example, her prayers concurred in recommending that pure\nand undefiled religion without which no human being shall see the\nLord. Shall we wonder that her scholars should be tenderly attached to\nsuch a preceptress; that they should leave her with their tears and\ntheir blessing; that they should carry an indelible remembrance of her\ninto the bosom of their families; that the reverence of pupils should\nripen with their years into the affection of friends; and that there\nshould be among them, at this day, many a wife who is a crown to her\nhusband, and many a mother who is a blessing to her children, and who\nowes, in a great degree, the felicity of her character to the\nimpressions, the principles, and the habits which she received while\nunder the maternal tuition of Mrs. GRAHAM?\n\n \"Admonished at length by the infirmities of age, and importuned\nby her friends, this venerable matron retired to private life. But it\nwas impossible for her to be idle. Her leisure only gave a new\ndirection to her activity. With no less alacrity than she had\ndisplayed in the education of youth, did she now embark in the relief\nof misery. Her benevolence was unbounded, but it was discreet. There\nare charities which increase the wretchedness they are designed to\ndiminish; which, from some fatal defect in their application, bribe to\niniquity while they are relieving want, and make food and raiment and\nclothing to warm into life the most poisonous seeds of vice. But the\ncharities of our departed friend were of another order. They selected\nthe fittest objects--the widow, the fatherless, the orphan, the\nuntaught child, and the ignorant adult. They combined intellectual and\nmoral benefit with the communication of physical comfort.\n\n \"In her house originated the Society for the Relief of Poor\nWidows with Small Children. Large, indeed, is this branch of the\nfamily of affliction, and largely did it share in her sympathy and\nsuccor. When at the head of this noble association, she made it her\nbusiness to see with her own eyes the objects of their care; and to\ngive, by her personal presence and efforts, the strongest impulse to\ntheir humane system. From morning till night has she gone from abode\nto abode of these destitute, who are too commonly unpitied by the\ngreat, despised by the proud, and forgotten by the gay. She has gone\nto sit beside them on their humble seat, hearing their simple and\nsorrowful story, sharing their homely meal--ascertaining the condition\nof their children--stirring them up to diligence, to economy, to\nneatness, to order--putting them into the way of obtaining suitable\nemployment for themselves and suitable places for their\nchildren--distributing among them the word of God, and tracts\ncalculated to familiarize its first principles to their\nunderstanding--cherishing them in sickness, admonishing them in\nhealth--instructing, reproving, exhorting, consoling--sanctifying the\nwhole with fervent prayer. Many a sobbing heart and streaming eye is\nthis evening embalming her memory in the house of the widow.\n\n \"Little if any less is the debt due to her from that invaluable\ncharity, the Orphan Asylum. It speaks its own praise, and that praise\nis hers. Scores of orphans redeemed from filth, from ignorance, from\nwretchedness, from crime--clothed, fed, instructed--trained in\ncleanliness to habits of industry--early imbued with the knowledge and\nfear of God--gradually preparing for respectability, usefulness, and\nhappiness, is a spectacle for angels. Their infantine gayety, their\nhealthful sport, their cherub faces, mark the contrast between their\npresent and former condition; and recall very tenderly the scenes in\nwhich they used to cluster round their patron-mother, hang on her\ngracious words, and receive her benediction.\n\n \"Brethren, I am not dealing in romance, but in sober fact. The\nnight would be too short for a full enumeration of her worthy deeds.\nSuffice it to say that they ended but with her life. The Sabbath\nprevious to her last sickness occupied her with a recent\ninstitution--a Sunday-school for ignorant adults; and the evening\npreceding the touch of death, found her at the side of a faithful\ndomestic, administering consolation to his wounded spirit.\n\n \"Such active benevolence could hardly be detected in company with\na niggardly temper. Wishes which cost nothing; pity which expires on\nthe lips; be ye warmed and be ye clothed, from a cold heart and an\nunyielding gripe, never imprinted their disgraceful brand upon\nIsabella Graham. What she urged upon others she exemplified in\nherself. She kept a purse for God. Here, in obedience to his command,\nshe deposited the first-fruits of all her increase; and they were\nsacred to his service, as in his providence he should call for them.\nNo shuffling pretences, no pitiful evasions, when a fair demand was\nmade upon the hallowed store; and no frigid affectation in determining\nthe quality of the demand. A sense of duty was the prompter, candor\nthe interpreter, and good sense the judge. Her disbursements were\nproportioned to the value of the object, and were ready at a moment's\nwarning, to the very last farthing.* How pungent a reproof to those\nladies of opulence and fashion who sacrifice so largely to their\ndissipation or their vanity, that they have nothing left for mouths\nwithout food, and limbs without raiment! How far does it throw back\ninto the shade those men of prosperous enterprise and gilded state\nwho, in the hope of some additional lucre, have thousands and ten\nthousands at their beck; but who, when asked for decent contributions\nto what they themselves acknowledge to be all-important, turn away\nwith this hollow excuse, 'I cannot afford it.' Above all, how should\nher example redden the faces of many who profess to belong to Christ;\nto have received gratuitously from him what he procured for them at\nthe expense of his own blood, 'an inheritance incorruptible and\nundefiled, and that fadeth not away;' and yet, in the midst of\nabundance which he has lavished upon them, when the question is about\nrelieving his suffering members, or promoting the glory of his\nkingdom, are sour, reluctant, mean. Are these the Christians? Can it\nbe that they have committed their bodies, their souls, their eternal\nhope, to a Saviour whose thousand promises on this very point of\nhonoring him with their substance, have less influence upon their\nhearts and their hands than the word of any honest man? Remember the\ndeceased, and hang your heads--remember her, and tremble; remember\nher, and bring forth fruits meet for repentance.\n\n*The author knew her, when in moderate circumstances, to give,\n unsolicited, _fifty pounds at once_ out of that sacred purse to\n a single most worthy purpose.\n\n \"In that charity, also, which far surpasses mere almsgiving,\nhowever liberal, the charity of the gospel, our friend was\nconspicuous. The love of God shed abroad in her own heart by the Holy\nGhost, drew forth her love to his people wherever she found them.\nAssuredly she had in herself this witness of her having 'passed from\ndeath unto life,' that she loved the brethren. The epistle, written\nnot with ink, but with the Spirit of the living God; not in tables of\nstone, but in fleshly tables of the heart; yet read and known of all\nmen: that is, the Christian temper manifested by a Christian\nconversation, was to her the best letter of recommendation. Unwavering\nin her own faith as to the peculiar doctrines of the gospel, she could\nnevertheless extend love without dissimulation, and the very bowels of\nChristian fellowship, to others who, whatever might be their mistakes,\ntheir infirmities, or their differences in smaller matters, agreed in\nthe great Christian essential of acceptance in the Beloved. Deeply did\nshe deplore the conceit, the bigotry, and the bitterness of sect. O\nthat her spirit were more prevalent in the churches; that we could\nlabor to abase our crown of pride; to offer up with one consent upon\nthe altar of evangelical charity, those petty jealousies, animosities,\nand strifes which are our common reproach; and walk together as\nchildren of the same Father, brethren of the same Redeemer, and heirs\nof the same salvation.\n\n \"To these admirable traits of character were added great\ntenderness of conscience and a spirit of prayer. Her religion, not\ncontented to justify her before men, habitually aimed at pleasing God,\nwho looketh upon the heart. It was not enough for her to persuade\nherself that a thing might be right. Before venturing upon it, she\nstudied to reduce the question of right to a clear certainty. How\ncautious and scrupulous and jealous of herself she was in this matter,\nthey best can tell who saw her in the shade of retirement as well as\nin the sunshine of public observation. Perhaps it is not going too far\nto say, that her least guarded moments would, in others, have been\nmarked for circumspection. At the same time her vigilance had nothing\naustere, gloomy, constrained, or censorious--nothing to repress the\ncheerfulness of social intercourse, or to excite in others, even the\nthoughtless, a dread of merciless criticism after they should retire.\nIt was sanctified nature moving gracefully in its own element. And\nwith respect to the character and feelings of her neighbors, she was\ntoo full of Christian kindness not to keep her tongue from evil and\nher lips from speaking guile.\n\n \"These virtues and graces were maintained and invigorated by her\nhabit of prayer. With the 'new and living way into the holiest by the\nblood of Jesus,' she was intimately familiar. Thither the Spirit of\ngrace and supplication daily conducted her; there taught her to pray,\nand in praying to believe, and in believing to have 'fellowship with\nthe Father and with his Son Jesus Christ.' She knew her God as the God\nthat heareth prayer; and could attest that 'blessed is she that\nbelieveth, for there shall be a performance of those things which were\ntold her from the Lord.'\n\n \"Under such influence her course could not but be correct, and\nher steps well ordered. The 'secret of the Lord is with them that fear\nhim; and he will show them his covenant, he will guide them in\njudgment.' Thus he did with his handmaid whom he hath called home.\nWherever she was, and in whatever circumstances, she remembered the\nguide of her youth, who, according to His promise, never left her, nor\nforsook her; but continued His gracious presence with her when she was\nold and gray-headed.\n\n \"You may perhaps imagine, that with such direction and support it\nwas impossible she should see trouble. Nay, but waters of a full cup\nwere wrung out to her. She often ate the bread of sorrow steeped in\nwormwood and gall. Her heavenly Father showed her great and sore\nadversities; that he might try her as silver is tried, and bring her\nforth from the furnace purified seven times. It was during these\nrefining processes that she found the worth of being a Christian.\nThough her way was planted with thorns and watered with her tears, yet\nthe candle of the Lord shone upon her head; and from step to step she\nhad reason to cry, Hitherto hath Jehovah helped.\n\n \"In a word, like Enoch, she walked with God; like Abraham, she\nstaggered not at his promise through unbelief; like Jacob, she\nwrestled with the angel and prevailed; like Moses, endured as seeing\nHim who is invisible; like Paul, finished her course with joy. Blessed\nwere the eyes of the preacher, for they saw the victory of her faith;\nand his ears, for they heard her song of salvation. 'You can say with\nthe apostle, I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is\nable to keep that which I have committed unto him?' 'O yes, but I\ncannot say the other, I have fought a good fight; I must say, I have\nfought a poor fight, I have run a poor race; but Christ fought for me.\nChrist ran with me, and through Christ I hope to win,' 'But you have\nno fear, no doubts, about your going to be with Christ?' 'O no, not a\ndoubt; I am as sure of that as if I were already in my Saviour's\narms.' It was her final conversation with children of the dust. The\nnext day, when her flesh and her heart had so far failed that she was\nincapable of uttering a sentence, she still proved her God to be the\nstrength of her heart, and knew him to be her portion for ever. I said\nto her, 'It is peace,' She opened her eyes, smiled, closed them again,\nbowed her dying head, and breathed out, 'Peace,' It was her last word\non this side heaven. The attending spirits caught it from her lips,\nand brought to her the next day permission to sleep in Jesus.\n\n \"From this review allow me to urge the value of private exertions\nin promoting general good.\n\n \"In pursuing his gratifications, man is apt to look upon himself\nas a being of great importance; in fulfilling his duties, to account\nhimself as nothing. Both are extravagances which it will be his wisdom\nand happiness to correct. He is neither supreme in worth nor useless\nin action. Let him not say, 'I am but one; my voice will be drowned in\nthe universal din; my weight is lighter than a feather in the public\nscale. It is better for me to mind my own affairs, and leave these\nhigher attempts to more competent hands.' This is the language, not of\nreason and modesty, but of sloth, of selfishness, and of pride. The\namount of it is, 'I cannot do every thing, therefore I will do\nnothing,' But you can do much. Act well your part according to your\nfaculties, your station, and your means. The result will be honorable\nto yourself, delightful to your friends, and beneficial to the world.\nI advise not to gigantic aims, to enormous enterprise. The world has\nseen but one Newton, and one Howard. Nothing is required of you but to\nmake the most of the opportunities within your reach.\n\n \"Recall the example of Mrs. Graham. Here was a woman, a widow, a\nstranger in a strange land, without fortune, with no friends but such\nas her letters of introduction and her worth should acquire, and with\na family of daughters dependent upon her for their subsistence. Surely\nif any one has a clear title of immunity from the obligation to carry\nher cares beyond the domestic circle, it is this widow, it is this\nstranger. Yet within a few years this stranger, this widow, with no\nmeans but her excellent sense, her benevolent heart, and her\npersevering will to do good, awakens the charities of a populous city,\nand gives to them an impulse, a direction, and an efficacy unknown\nbefore.\n\n \"What might not be done by men--by men of talent, of standing, of\nwealth, of leisure? How speedily, under their well-directed\nbeneficence, might a whole country change its physical, intellectual,\nand moral aspect; and assume, comparatively speaking, the face of\nanother Eden, a second garden of God. Why then do they not diffuse\nthus extensively the seeds of knowledge, of virtue, and of bliss? I\nask not for their pretences; they are as old as the lust of lucre, and\nare refuted by the example which we have been contemplating: I ask for\nthe true reason, for the inspiring principle of their conduct. It is\nthis--let them look to it when God shall call them to account for the\nabuse of their time, their talents, their station, their 'unrighteous\nmammon'--it is this: they believe not 'the words of the Lord Jesus,\nhow he said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.' They labor\nunder no want but one, they want _the heart_. The bountiful God\nadd this to the other gifts which he has bestowed upon them. I turn to\nthe other sex.\n\n \"That venerable mother in Israel who has exchanged the service of\nGod on earth for his service in heaven, has left a legacy to her\nsisters: she has left the example of her faith and patience; she has\nleft her prayers; she has left the monument of her Christian deeds;\nand by these she being dead, yet speaketh. Matrons, has she left her\nmantle also? Are there none among you to hear her voice from the tomb,\nGo and do thou likewise? None whom affluence permits, endowments\nqualify, and piety prompts, to aim at her distinction by treading in\nher steps? Maidens, are there none among you who would wish to array\nyourselves hereafter in the honors of this virtuous woman? Your hearts\nhave dismissed their wonted warmth and generosity, if they do not\nthrob as the revered vision rises before you. Then prepare yourselves\nnow, by seeking and serving the God of her youth. You cannot be too\nearly adorned with the robes of righteousness and the garments of\nsalvation in which she was wedded, in her morning of life, to Jesus\nthe King of glory. That same grace which threw its radiance around\nher, shall make you also to shine in the beauty of holiness; and the\nfragrance of those virtues which it shall create, develope, and\nennoble, will be 'as the smell of a field which the Lord hath\nblessed.'\n\n \"Yea, let me press upon all the transcendent excellence of\nChristian character, and the victorious power of Christian hope. The\nformer bears the image of God; the latter is as imperishable as his\nthrone. We fasten our eyes with more real respect and more heart-felt\napprobation upon the moral majesty displayed in walking as Christ also\nwalked, than upon all the pomps of the monarch or decorations of the\nmilitary hero. More touching to the sense and more grateful to high\nheaven is the soft melancholy with which we look after our departed\nfriend, and the tear which embalms her memory, than the thundering\nplaudits which rend the air with the name of a conqueror. She has\nobtained a triumph over that foe who shall break the arm of valor, and\nstrike off the crown of kings. 'The fashion of this world passeth\naway.' Old Time approaches towards his last hour. The proudest\nmemorials of human grandeur shall be food for the conflagration to be\nkindled when 'the Lord Jesus shall be revealed from heaven in flaming\nfire. Then shall he be glorified in his saints, and admired in all\nthem that believe.'\n\n \"There are those perhaps, in the present assembly, who repute\ngodliness fanaticism, and the sobriety of Christian peace the gloom of\na joyless spirit; but who cannot forbear sighing out, with the prophet\nof mammon, 'Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end\nbe like his.' If they proceed no further, their wish will not be\ngranted. None shall die the death of the righteous, unless by a rare\ndispensation of mercy, who do not live his life. They only are fit to\nbe with God who love God and keep his commandments. In that day of\ntransport and of terror which we shall all witness, how many of the\nthoughtless fair who now 'sport themselves with their own deceivings,'\nwould give all the treasures of the east and thrones of the west to\nsit with Isabella Graham on the right hand of Jesus Christ. If ye be\nwise betimes, ye may. Now is the accepted time; to-day is the day of\nsalvation. The gospel of the Son of God offers you at this very\nmoment, the forgiveness of your sins, and an inheritance among them\nthat are sanctified. The blessing comes to you as a free gift: accept\nit, and live; accept it, and be safe; accept it, and put away the\nshudderings of guilt and the fear of death. Then shall you too, like\nour friend, go in due season to be with Christ. Your happy spirit\nshall rejoin hers in the mansions of the saved. God shall bring you in\nsoul and body with her when he makes up his jewels. Then shall he\ngather his elect from the four winds of heaven, shall perfect that\nwhich concerneth them, and make them fully and for ever blessed. Be\nour place among them in that day.'\n\n\n EXTRACT FROM MRS. GRAHAM'S\n LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT.\n\n \"My children and my grandchildren I leave to my covenant God--the\nGod who hath fed me all my life with the bread that perisheth, and the\nbread that never perisheth; who has been a Father to my fatherless\nchildren, and a Husband to their widowed mother thus far. And now,\nreceiving my Redeemer's testimony, John 3:33, I set to my seal that\nGod is true; and believing the record in John's epistle, that God hath\ngiven to me eternal life, and this life is in his Son, who, through\nthe eternal Spirit, offered himself without spot unto God, and being\nconsecrated a priest for ever, hath with his own blood, entered into\nthe holy place, having obtained eternal redemption for me. I also\nbelieve that he will perfect what concerns me, support and carry me\nsafely through death, and present me to his Father, complete in\nhis own righteousness, without spot or wrinkle. Into the hands\nof this redeeming God, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, I commit my\nredeemed spirit.\"\n\n\n Mrs. Graham's epitaph on a tablet in the Pearl-street church, is\nassociated with that of her son-in-law Mr. Bethune, to whom before his\nconnection with the family she was a spiritual mother; who prepared\nher memoir, wrote and printed tracts for her widows, imported Bibles\nfor her to distribute, replenished her charity purse when exhausted;\nwith whom she took sweet counsel and walked to the house of God in\ncompany; and for whom she was pleased to leave the written and\nhonorable testimony: \"He stands in my mind, in temper, conduct, and\nconversation, the nearest to the gospel standard of any man or woman I\never knew as intimately. Devoted to his God, to his church, to his\nfamily, to all to whom he may have opportunity of doing good, duty is\nhis governing principle; cast upon his care, under God he nourishes me\nwith kindness,\" etc. They have entered into rest. One sepulchre\ncontains their sleeping dust, and one monument bears the following\ntribute to their memory:\n\n\n SACRED TO THE MEMORY\n OF\n DIVIE BETHUNE,\n MERCHANT OF THIS CITY,\n WHO DIED SEPTEMBER 18, 1824, AGED 53 YEARS;\n\n AND OF\n\n ISABELLA GRAHAM,\n HIS MOTHER-IN-LAW,\n WHO DIED JULY 27, 1814, AGED 72 YEARS.\n\n THEY WERE BOTH NATIVES OF SCOTLAND.\n\n\n THIS MONUMENT\n IS REARED BY HIS BEREAVED WIDOW AND HER ORPHAN DAUGHTER,\n AS A TESTIMONIAL OF TWO SERVANTS OF JESUS CHRIST:\n THE ONE A RULING ELDER IN HIS CHURCH, THE OTHER A MOTHER IN ISRAEL;\n WHO, LIKE ENOCH, WALKED WITH GOD,\n LIKE ABRAHAM, OBTAINED THE RIGHTEOUSNESS OF FAITH,\n AND, LIKE PAUL, FINISHED THEIR COURSE WITH JOY.\n THEY WERE LOVELY AND PLEASANT IN THEIR LIVES,\n AND THEY REST HERE TOGETHER IN THEIR GRAVES.\n\n\"THE BLESSING OF HIM THAT WAS READY TO PERISH CAME UPON THEM; AND\nTHEY CAUSED THE WIDOW'S HEART TO SING FOR JOY.\" JOB 29:13.\n\n\"OH HOW GREAT IS THY GOODNESS, WHICH THOU HAST LAID UP FOR THEM\nTHAT FEAR THEE; WHICH THOU HAST WROUGHT FOR THEM THAT TRUST IN THEE\nBEFORE THE SONS OF MEN!\" PSA. 31:19.\n\n\n\n\n PROVISION\n\n FOR\n\n MY LAST JOURNEY THROUGH THE WILDERNESS\n\n AND\n\n PASSAGE OVER JORDAN.*\n\n*Found in Mrs. Graham's pocket after her decease.\n\n \"'Prepare you victuals, for within three days ye shall pass over\nthis Jordan, to go in to possess the land which the Lord your God\ngiveth you to possess it. When ye see the ark of the covenant of the\nLord your God, and the priests bearing it, then ye shall remove and go\nafter it: that ye may know the way by which ye must go, for ye have\nnot passed this way heretofore.'\n\n \"'Sanctify yourselves, for to-morrow the Lord will do wonders\namong you.'\n\n \"'Behold, the ark of the covenant of the Lord of all the earth\npasseth over before you into Jordan: and it shall come to pass, that\nas soon as the soles of the feet of the priests that bear the ark of\nthe Lord, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters, that\nthe waters of Jordan shall be cut off from the waters that come down\nfrom above; and they shall stand upon a heap.'\n\n \"'And it came to pass, that when the people removed from their\ntents to pass over Jordan, and the priests bearing the ark of the\ncovenant before the people, that as they that bare the ark were come\ninto Jordan, and the feet of the priests were dipped in the brim of\nthe water, that the waters that came down from above stood and rose up\nupon a heap; and the priests that bare the ark of the covenant of the\nLord stood firm on dry ground in the midst of Jordan, and all the\nIsraelites passed over on dry ground.'\n\n \"'And Joshua set up twelve stones in the midst of Jordan, in the\nplace where the feet of the priests that bare the ark of the covenant\nof the Lord stood; and they are there unto this day.'\n\n \"'When your children shall ask their fathers in time to come,\nsaying, What mean these stones? ye shall let your children know,\nsaying, Israel came over this Jordan on dry land; for the Lord your\nGod dried up the waters from before you until ye were passed over, as\nthe Lord your God did to the Red sea, which he dried up, until we were\npassed over; that all people of the earth might know the hand of the\nLord, that it is mighty: that ye might fear the Lord your God for\never,' Amen. Josh. 1:11; chap. 3, 4.\n\n \"Oh, thou Jehovah; Israel's God, and by thy new covenant, my God;\nthus far hast thou brought me through the wilderness: bearing,\nchastising, forgiving, restoring. Well hast thou made out thy\nwilderness name to me: 'The Lord, the Lord God, merciful and gracious,\nlong-suffering, and abundant in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for\nthousands, forgiving iniquity, transgression, and sin.' Great have\nbeen my provocations, but greater still thy covenant mercy. I have not\nperished with them that believed not; sore bitten I am, but thou hast\nfixed mine eyes on the lifted-up Healer, and I am in his hand for\nfurther cure. My journey has been long, and my way devious; but my\nblessed Joshua is still in view. I must be near to Jordan's flood; I\nhave been preparing victuals from thine own repository of truth. And\nnow, my blessed High-priest and Ark of the covenant, lead on my\nstaggering steps the little further. I have not gone this way\nheretofore, but thou hast measured these waters while they overflowed\nall their banks. Thou hast passed through, and made the passage safe\nfor thy people. At thy command the waters stand up upon a heap, and\nthey pass through in thy presence on faith's firm ground. Keep then\nmine eye upon thee, and I shall fear no evil. And Oh, my, blessed\nLeader, if it might please thee, I would ask a boon, yet with\nsubmission, that thy sensible presence might be with me all the way\nthrough; and that thou wouldst bring from my quivering lips a\ntestimony to the glory of thy grace, that my children may know that\nthou hast pardoned, restored, perfected, dried up the waters of\nterror, carried me triumphantly through, and put me in possession of\nthe purchased inheritance. Amen.\n\n \"'This is a faithful saying, and worthy of all acceptation, that\nChrist Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief.'\n1 Tim. 1:15.\n\n \"I have often inquired, What is there within us, or without us,\non which a sinner can rest in peace in a dying hour? If it be a holy\nlife, there can be no peace for me--taking the law of God for my\nstandard; backslider is my name; yet I think in this sacred volume I\nfind a hope even for me, the chief of sinners.\n\n \"'As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness, even so must\nthe Son of man be lifted up, that whosoever believeth on him should\nnot perish, but have eternal life. For God so loved the world, that he\ngave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him should not\nperish, but have eternal life. For God sent not his Son into the world\nto condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved.'\n'He that cometh from heaven is above all, and what he hath seen and\nheard, that he testifieth.' 'He that receiveth his testimony has set\nto his seal that God is true.' 'The Father loveth the Son, and hath\ngiven all things into his hand; he that believeth on the Son hath\neverlasting life.' John 3:14-36. Here is a hope for me; the world is\nmade up of sinners, I am one of them, and though the chief, am not\nexcluded. The Son of man came to save that which was lost, Matt.\n18:11; I am of that description. 'The Pharisees said, Why eateth your\nmaster with publicans and sinners? Jesus said, The whole need not a\nphysician, but they that are sick.' Matt. 9:11. I am a sinner, and\nsick. 'I will have mercy, and not sacrifice; for I am not come to call\nthe righteous, but sinners to repentance.' I am a sinner, and need\nrepentance. 'Him hath God exalted with his right hand, to be a Prince\nand a Saviour, to give repentance to Israel and forgiveness of sins.'\nActs 5:31. 'The Lord is long-suffering, not willing that any should\nperish, but that all should come to repentance.' 2 Pet. 3:9.\n\n \"Christ said to the woman of Samaria, a notorious sinner, 'If\nthou knewest the gift of God, and who it is that saith to thee, Give\nme to drink, thou wouldest have asked of him, and he would have given\nthee living water. Whosoever drinketh of this water shall thirst\nagain; but whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him,\nshall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall be in\nhim a well of water springing up into everlasting life.' John 4:10,\n14. Yes, my Redeemer, a draught of this water, received in faith from\nthe hand of the Spirit, will give life in death. O pour it into my\nthirsty soul in that searching hour.\n\n \"Jesus said to a mixed multitude of sinners like me, 'Labor not\nfor the meat which perisheth, but for that meat which endureth unto\neverlasting life, which the Son of man shall give unto you; for him\nhath God the Father sealed,' John 6:27. These sinners said unto him,\n'What shall we do that we might work the works of God?' 'That ye\nbelieve on Him whom he hath sent. My Father giveth you the true bread\nfrom heaven, for the bread of God is he which cometh down from heaven,\nand giveth life unto the world: I am the bread of life; he that cometh\nunto me shall never hunger, and he that believeth on me shall never\nthirst. I am the living bread which came down from heaven; if any man\neat of this bread, he shall live for ever. And the bread which I shall\ngive is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world. Jesus\nsaid unto them, Except ye eat the flesh, and drink the blood of the\nSon of man, ye have no life in you: whoso eateth my flesh, and\ndrinketh my blood, dwelleth in me, and I in him. As the living Father\nhath sent me, and I live by the Father; so he that eateth me, even he\nshall live by me.' The Father giveth this bread, the Son giveth this\nbread; whosoever will, may take of this bread, and the promise with\nit. Father, I take this bread, I take and believe that I have in thee\neternal life, according to thy word. O holy and blessed Comforter,\nSpirit of the Father and of the Son, whose office it is to take of the\nthings of Christ and show them unto his redeemed, when the bread and\nthe water that perish can no longer refresh this dying body, apply\nthis living bread and living water to my soul, that life may spring up\nin the midst of death; and in that trying hour, bear witness with my\nspirit that I dwell in Christ, and Christ in me, and that I shall\nnever die.\n\n \"'In the last day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood and\ncried, If any man thirst, let him come unto me and drink. He that\nbelieveth on me, as the Scripture hath said, out of his belly shall\nflow rivers of living water. This spake he of the Spirit, that they\nwho believe on him should receive.' John 7:37. This he proclaimed to a\nmixed multitude of sinners like myself. Lord, I believe, and am sure\nthat thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God. Be it unto me\naccording to thy word: 'I am the resurrection and the life: he that\nbelieveth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live; and whosoever\nliveth and believeth in me, shall never die. Believest thou this?'\nJohn 11:25. I believe that thou art the Christ, the Son of the living\nGod, which should come into the world; the promised Messiah; the gift\nof the Father, the covenant given to the people; the anointed Prophet\nand King, and consecrated High-priest; who through the eternal Spirit\nofferedst thyself without spot unto God; who came to do that most\nperfect will of God, by which we are sanctified through the offering\nof the body of Christ once for all. Lamb of God, which takest away the\nsins of the world, on thee I lay my precious never-dying soul; wash me\nin thy blood, clothe me in thy righteousness; sanctify me, soul,\nspirit, and body, to thy service. I have no other foundation of hope,\nnothing within me, nothing without me; my entire dependence is on thy\nfinished work; into thy hands I commit my spirit.\n\n \"Let me hear thy consoling voice, compassionate Saviour. 'Let not\nyour heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me. In my\nFather's house are many mansions; if it were not so I would have told\nyou. I go to prepare a place for you. I will come again and receive\nyou unto myself, that where I am, there ye may be also,' John 14:1-3.\nO seal this upon my heart, and it is enough. To be where thou art, is\nheaven enough to me. To be where thou art, to see thee as thou art,\nand to be made like thee, the last sinful motion for ever past--no\nmore opposition, no more weariness, listlessness, dryness, deadness;\nbut conformed to my blessed Head, every way capacitated to serve him,\nand to enjoy him--this is heaven.\n\n \"'Jesus said, I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no man\ncometh to the Father, but by me.' Blessed Comforter, do thine office;\ntake these things of Christ and show them unto me; lead me in this\nway, feed me with this truth, and animate me with this life:\n'Whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, that will I do,\nthat the Father may be glorified in the Son. If ye ask any thing in my\nname, I will do it.' Blessed Comforter, here also do thine office: I\nknow not what to ask for as I ought; help mine infirmities as thou\nhast said; suggest the prayer, be in me the spirit of prayer and\nsupplication, and especially in that hour of need, when sickness saps\nthe clay tabernacle, discomposing the spirit, and confusing perhaps\nthe ideas: still, still let my thoughts rise to my God. Oh, let no\nunhallowed subject get hold of me in that hour, but keep my Saviour's\nname in my heart, and on my lips. Is not this according to thy will?\nwatch over it then, and keep the avenues of my soul from every\nvain idea.\n\n \"'If ye love me, keep my commandments, and I will pray the\nFather, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide\nwith you for ever, even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot\nreceive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him; but ye know\nhim, for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you. He that hath my\ncommandments and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me; and he that\nloveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will\nmanifest myself unto him; and we will come and make our abode with\nhim. The Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send\nin my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to\nyour remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you. Peace I leave with\nyou; my peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto\nyou: let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.' In\nthat last warfare, when nothing on earth can give peace; when the\nworld recedes, and disappears; when friends must stand aloof and leave\nme to the combat alone; Oh, blessed and promised Comforter, bring to\nmy remembrance, and impress on my weary spirit these sweet words of my\nSaviour. But it has often occurred to me, and may in that hour, that\nthough Jesus received sinners, they were ignorant sinners. The Jews\nunderstood not the gospel contained in their types and sacrifices;\nthey were unenlightened and unconverted; the Gentiles were totally\nblind, serving dumb idols; neither had known the gospel, neither had\ntasted the grace of God, neither were backsliders, like me. I have\nknown the truth, been enlightened, tasted of the heavenly gift, been\nmade a partaker of the Holy Ghost, tasted of the good word of God, and\nof the power of the world to come.\n\n \"Fifty years ago the Lord convinced me of my sin, my misery, and\nmy total helplessness. I was also, I think, enabled to lay hold on the\nhope set before me.\n\n \"I have, in numerous exercises and acts, accepted of God's gift\nof Jesus Christ to me a condemned sinner; taking hold of the Scripture\nwords of invitation and promise held out for my acceptance. I have\npleaded his own covenant provision, in the substitution of his own Son\nin my stead, making him to be sin, who knew no sin, that sinners might\nbe made the righteousness of God in him. I put in my claim as a\nsinner, among the ungodly for whom Christ died. I believed his\ntestimony, and set to my seal that God is true. I rested on this\nfoundation--I yet have no other; I know there is no other. The\nfoundation standeth sure. But Oh, what am I to think of the fruits? I\nhave again and again turned back into the world, grieved the Spirit,\ncrucified the Son of God afresh, and put him to open shame. No wonder\nI stand alarmed at the apostle's assertion: my conscience testifies\nthat my character is nearly, if not altogether, such as the apostle,\nby the Holy Spirit, says it is impossible to renew to repentance.\nHebrews 6:4, 5. But thou hast renewed to repentance! Thy name is 'the\nLord, the Lord God, merciful and gracious, long-suffering, and\nabundant in goodness and truth, keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving\niniquity, transgression, and sin.' Thou wilt by no means clear the\nguilty; but thou hast provided a substitute, and laid my guilt and\nguilty person on thine own Son.\n\n \"By this gracious name thou wast known to thy backsliding Israel\nin the wilderness; whose heart, like mine, was not right with God;\nneither were they steadfast in his covenant; but he, 'being full of\ncompassion, forgave their iniquity, and destroyed them not.' Many a\ntime turned he his anger away, and did not stir up all his wrath. They\nforgot God their Saviour, who had done great things for them; they\ntransgressed his commandment, and in their heart turned back again to\nEgypt; they brought upon themselves many afflictions, and many times\ndid he deliver them; they provoked him with their counsel, and were\nbrought low for their iniquity; nevertheless, he heard their cry, and\nrepented according to the multitude of his mercies; while the blood of\nbulls and of goats typified the great propitiatory sacrifice, by which\n'God can be just and justify the ungodly.' By this name was the Lord\nGod, merciful and gracious, known in the pleasant land; and by the\nsame sacrifice, the blood of Christ, which cleanseth from all sin, was\ntypified. Psalms 103, 51.\n\n \"The prophets prophesied in his name. 'All we, like sheep, have\ngone astray, and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all. He\nwas wounded for our transgressions, and bruised for our iniquities;\nthe chastisement of our peace was laid on him, and by his stripes we\nare healed.' 'Deliver him from going down to the pit; I have found a\nransom.' Even backsliders, among whom I stand chief, have been\nrecalled. 'My people have committed two evils: they have forsaken me\nthe fountain of living waters, and have hewn out to themselves\ncisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water. Is Israel a\nservant; is he a home-born slave; wherefore is he spoiled? Hast thou\nnot procured this to thyself, in that thou hast forsaken the Lord thy\nGod, when he led thee by the way? And now what hast thou to do in the\nway of Egypt, to drink the waters of Sihor? or what hast thou to do in\nthe way of Assyria, to drink the waters of the river? Thine own\nwickedness shall correct thee, and thy backslidings shall reprove\nthee. Know therefore, and see that it is an evil and bitter thing,\nthat thou hast forsaken the Lord thy God, and that my fear is not in\nthee, saith the Lord God of hosts. For of old I have broken thy yoke,\nand burst thy bands; and thou saidst, I will not transgress; when upon\nevery high hill and under every green tree thou wanderest, playing the\nharlot. Yet I had planted thee a noble vine, wholly a right seed: how\nart thou turned into the degenerate plant of a strange vine unto me?\nWhy gaddest thou about so much to change thy way? thou also shalt be\nashamed of Egypt, as thou wast ashamed of Assyria. Have I been a\nbarren wilderness, or a land of darkness unto thee? Wherefore say my\npeople, We are lords, and will come no more to thee? Can a maid forget\nher ornaments, or a bride her attire? yet my people have forgotten me,\ndays without number.' Jeremiah 2. 'They say, If a man put away his\nwife, and she go from him, and become another man's, shall he return\nto her again? shall not that land be greatly polluted? But thou hast\nplayed the harlot with many lovers; yet return again unto me, saith\nthe Lord. Wilt thou not from this time cry unto me. My Father, thou\nart the guide of my youth?' What can I say to such grace? Thou art\ninfinite in thy mercy to pardon, and in thy power to save. Such has\nbeen my character, and such the amazing mercy of my offended God.\nOften, often has he pardoned, restored, blessed, and made me happy.\nBut Oh, just is the renewed charge against me. 'For the house of\nIsrael and the house of Judah have dealt very treacherously with me,\nsaith the Lord. They have belied the Lord, and said, It is not he,\nneither shall evil come upon us.' 'Go and proclaim these words, and\nsay, Return, thou backsliding Israel, saith the Lord; and I will not\ncause mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful, saith the Lord,\nI will not keep anger for ever. Only acknowledge thine iniquity, that\nthou hast transgressed against the Lord thy God; and ye have not\nobeyed my voice, saith the Lord. Turn, O backsliding children, for I\nam married unto you.' Jer. 3. What, O what can I say to such grace?\nTruly, thy ways are not as our ways, nor thy thoughts as our thoughts.\nFor as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are thy ways higher\nthan our ways, and thy thoughts than our thoughts. Oh, how is my guilt\naggravated by all this grace; and yet thou callest, _Return;_ and\nthou thyself turnest me. I do, O Lord God, merciful and gracious, I do\nacknowledge my iniquity; every time I turn back my eyes upon my past\nlife my sins rise in magnitude, heightened by more enlarged views of\nthy goodness. It is of the Lord's mercies that I am not consumed,\nbecause his compassions fail not.\n\n \"A voice was heard upon the high places, weeping and supplication\nof the children of Israel, for they have perverted their ways, and\nthey have forgotten the Lord their God. Yes, thou hast, my gracious\nGod, granted repentance. Thine eye has seen the tears I have shed;\nthou hast given me a contrite heart. I have looked upon him whom I\nhave pierced, and been in bitterness as for a first-born. I feel it\nnow, and must feel it while the body of sin exists. But Oh, Lord God,\nmerciful and gracious, the cause is in thyself, that I hear thy voice,\nand that I answer. 'Return, ye backsliding children, and I will heal\nyour backslidings. Behold, I come unto thee, for thou art the Lord our\nGod. Truly in vain is salvation hoped for from the hills and the\nmultitude of mountains. Truly, in the Lord God is the salvation of\nIsrael. We lie down in our shame, our confusion covereth us: for we\nhave sinned against the Lord our God; we and our fathers, even from\nour youth; and have not obeyed the voice of the Lord God. Thus saith\nthe Lord God, I will even deal with thee as thou hast done, who hast\ndespised the oath in breaking the covenant. Nevertheless, I will\nremember my covenant with thee in the days of thy youth; and I will\nestablish unto thee an everlasting covenant, and thou shalt know that\nI am the Lord. That thou mayest remember and be confounded, and never\nopen thy mouth any more, because of thy shame, when I am pacified\ntowards thee, saith the Lord God.' Amen, Lord God, merciful and\ngracious. Be it so. It is so _now_--it _must_, it will be\nso, until death shall open mine eyes on that mystery: The glory of God\narising out of the abounding of sin, through the superabounding of\ngrace, and grace reigning through righteousness unto eternal life, by\nJesus Christ our Lord!\n\n \"Till then, while sin dwelleth in me, let me enjoy the\nblessedness of a contrite heart; yea, even shame and confusion, since\nit is the sign that thou art pacified with me. Thou hast dealt with\nme, thou hast chastened, and in some instances taken vengeance on my\ninventions. But thou art pacified with me, and I dare look again to\nthy holy temple, to the temple not made with hands, to the minister of\nthe sanctuary, and the true tabernacle which the Lord pitched, and not\nman; to the blessed High-priest, who through the eternal Spirit\noffered himself a sacrifice without spot unto God, and by his own\nblood entered in once into the holy place, having obtained eternal\nredemption for us, and when he had purged our sins, sat down on the\nright hand of the Majesty on high; to the blessed Mediator of the new\nand better covenant, established on better promises; to the Surety of\nthe new testament, and sealed with his own blood. Oh, I will look unto\nJesus, the object, the author, and the finisher of that faith which\ninterests us in himself and the whole of his purchase. He bids me look\nunto him, and be saved. I do look unto him, and I am saved. Who dares\ncondemn the sinner whom Christ acquits? Who shall lay any thing to his\ncharge? 'It is Christ that died; yea, rather, who is risen again;\nwho is even at the right hand of God; who also maketh intercession\nfor us.'\"\n\n\n ISAIAH 44:22. \"RETURN UNTO ME.\n\n A SCRIPTURE PARAPHRASE BY D. B----\n\n \"Return to thee, my God? dost thou\n The invitation yet renew?\n Return to thee! my chiefest joy,\n Till sin did all my peace destroy.\n\n \"And yet, to hear thy pardoning voice\n Must make my trembling heart rejoice;\n Though sin is there, thou well dost know\n It is my burden and my foe.\n\n \"O let me hear those gracious words:\n Be still, my soul, they are the Lord's;\n That God, who once on thee did shine,\n And filled thee with a hope divine.\n\n \"'Thy black transgressions, trembling soul--\n Thy sins so heinous and so foul,\n Which like a cloud obscure thy day,\n I've blotted out, I've washed away.\n\n \"'Return to me, thou 'rt mine; I own\n Thee for my servant, and my son;\n I have redeemed thy precious soul,\n And none my purchase shall control.'\n\n \"I hear, I come, my covenant God:\n Thy love's my life, my raiment, food;\n Thy favor, through my Jesus given,\n Is to my soul the bliss of heaven.\n\n \"I come, my Jesus; hold me fast,\n Till, life and Jordan's journey past,\n My faith to vision yield her place,\n And I shall see thy unveiled face.\n\n \"Then, with the loudest of the throng,\n Of sins forgiven I'll raise the song--\n Of pardon bought with Jesus' blood,\n Sinners made kings and priests to God.\"\n\n\n PSALM 103. FIFTY YEARS AGO.\n\n \"Oh thou, my soul, bless God the Lord,\n And all that in me is\n Be stirred up, his holy name\n To magnify and bless,\" etc.\n\n \"'I will not leave you comfortless; I will come to you. Yet a\nlittle while, and the world seeth me no more; but ye see me: because I\nlive, ye shall live also. At that day ye shall know that I am in my\nFather, and ye in me, and I in you. Believest thou not that I am in\nthe Father, and the Father in me? He that hath seen me, hath seen the\nFather. Howbeit, when the Spirit of truth is come, he will guide you\ninto all truth. He shall glorify me; for he shall receive of mine, and\nshall show it unto you. All things that the Father hath are mine;\ntherefore said I, that he shall take of mine, and shall show it unto\nyou.' John 14; 16:14. 'Neither pray I for these alone, but for them\nalso which shall believe on me through their word; that they all may\nbe one; as thou, Father, art in me and I in thee, that they may be one\nin us: that the world may believe that thou hast sent me. And the\nglory which thou gavest me I have given them, that they may be one,\neven as we are one, I in them and thou in me, that they may be made\nperfect in one; that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and\nhast loved them as thou hast loved me. Father, I will that they also,\nwhom thou hast given me, be with me where I am, that they may behold\nmy glory, which thou hast given me; for thou lovedst me before the\nfoundation of the world.' John 17:20, etc. 'All are yours; and ye are\nChrist's; and Christ is God's.' 1 Cor. 3:22. 'Ye are dead, and your\nlife is hid with Christ in God. When Christ, who is our life, shall\nappear, then shall ye also appear with him in glory.' Col. 3:3. 'For\nin him dwelleth all the fulness of the Godhead bodily. And ye are\ncomplete in him, which is the head of all principality and power.'\nCol. 2:9. 'There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in\none hope of your calling: one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God\nand Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all.\nBut unto every one of us is given grace according to the measure of\nthe gift of Christ.' Eph. 4:4.\n\n \"'I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but\nChrist liveth in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh, I\nlive by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself\nfor me,' Gal. 2: 20.\n\n \"'Behold the Lamb of God, which taketh away the sin of the world!\nAnd looking upon Jesus as he walked, John saith, Behold the Lamb of\nGod!' John 1:29, 36.\n\n \"'Therefore let no man glory in men: for all things are yours;\nwhether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas, or the world, or life, or death,\nor things present, or things to come; all are yours; and ye are\nChrist's; and Christ is God's,' 1 Cor. 3:21.\n\n \"'It is good for a man that he bear the yoke in his youth. He\nsitteth alone and keepeth silence; he putteth his mouth in the dust,\nif so be there may be hope; he giveth his cheek to him that smiteth\nhim: he is filled full with reproach.' Lam. 3:27.\n\n \"'That thou mayest remember, and be confounded, and never open\nthy mouth any more, because of thy shame, when I am pacified toward\nthee for all that thou hast done, saith the Lord.' Ezek. 16:63.\n_Amen._\n\n \"'A day of darkness and of gloominess, a day of clouds and of\nthick darkness, as the morning spread upon the mountains. Therefore,\nalso now, saith the Lord, turn ye unto me with all your heart, with\nfasting, with weeping, and with mourning. Rend your heart, and not\nyour garments, and turn unto the Lord your God; for he is gracious and\nmerciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repenteth him of\nthe evil,' Joel 2:2, 12.\n\n \"'I will visit upon her the days of Baalim: she went after her\nlovers, and forgat me, saith the Lord. I will allure her, and bring\nher into the wilderness, and speak comfortably unto her. And I will\nbetroth thee unto me for ever; yea, I will betroth thee unto me in\nrighteousness, and in judgment, and in loving-kindness, and in\nmercies. I will even betroth thee unto me in faithfulness: and thou\nshalt know the Lord.' Hosea 2:13.\n\n \"'O Israel, thou hast destroyed thyself; but in me is thy help.'\n'Return unto the Lord thy God, for thou hast fallen by thine iniquity.\nTake with you words, and turn to the Lord; say unto him, Take away all\niniquity, and receive us graciously: so will we render the calves of\nour lips. Ashur shall not save us; we will not ride upon horses:\nneither will we say any more to the work of our hands, Ye are our\ngods: for in thee the fatherless findeth mercy.' Hosea 13:14.\n\n \"'I will heal their backsliding, I will love them freely; for\nmine anger is turned away from him. I will be as the dew unto Israel;\nhe shall grow as the lily, and cast forth his roots as Lebanon.\nEphraim shall say, What have I to do any more with idols? I have heard\nhim, and observed him. I am like a green fir-tree; from me is thy\nfruit found.' Hosea 14.\n\n \"'O Lord, to us belongeth confusion of face, because we have\nsinned against thee. To the Lord our God belong mercies and\nforgiveness, though we have rebelled against him.' Daniel 9.\n\n \"'He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the\nlambs in his arms, and carry them in his bosom; and shall gently lead\nthose that are with young. Why sayest thou, O Jacob, and speakest, O\nIsrael, My way is hid from the Lord, and my judgment is passed over\nfrom my God? Hast thou not known, hast thou not heard, that the\neverlasting God fainteth not, neither is weary? there is no searching\nof his understanding. He giveth power to the faint; and to them that\nhave no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and\nbe weary, and the young men shall utterly fall; but they that wait\nupon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with\nwings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk,\nand not faint.' Isa. 40:11, etc.\n\n \"'Who gave Jacob for a spoil, and Israel to the robbers? Did not\nthe Lord, he against whom we have sinned? For they would not walk in\nhis ways, neither were they obedient to his law. Therefore he hath\npoured upon him the fury of his anger, and the strength of battle: and\nit hath set him on fire round about, yet he knew not; and it burned\nhim, yet he laid it not to heart. But now thus saith the Lord that\ncreated thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not;\nfor I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art\nmine. When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and\nthrough the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest\nthrough the fire, thou shalt not be burnt; neither shall the flame\nkindle upon thee. For I am the Lord thy God, the Holy One of Israel,\nthy Saviour. Since thou wast precious in my sight thou hast been\nhonorable, and I have loved thee.' Isa. 42:24, etc.\n\n \"Yes, my God, I remember and am confounded; amazed at my\ningratitude, amazed at thy grace. I am thy witness, just so has been\nthy way with me. What can I say? Thou hast wrought with me for thy\nname's sake. I am dumb before thee; Oh, I am vile--and yet I am thine!\nThou hast redeemed me; it is thy good pleasure to save me. Glorify thy\nname. 'I have blotted out, as a thick cloud, thy transgressions, and\nas a cloud, thy sins: return unto me; for I have redeemed thee. Sing,\nO ye heavens; for the Lord hath done it: shout, ye lower parts of the\nearth: break forth into singing, ye mountains, O forest and every\ngreen tree therein; for the Lord hath redeemed Jacob, and glorified\nhimself in Israel.'\n\n \"'For if by one man's offence, death reigned by one; much more\nthey which receive abundance of grace, and of the gift of\nrighteousness, shall reign in life by one, Christ Jesus. Where sin\nabounded, grace did much more abound: that as sin hath reigned unto\ndeath, so might grace reign through righteousness unto eternal life,\nby Jesus Christ our Lord.'\n\n \"'Look unto me, and be ye saved, all the ends of the earth: for I\nam God, and there is none else. I have sworn by myself, the word is\ngone out of my mouth in righteousness, and shall not return, that unto\nme every knee shall bow, every tongue shall swear. Surely shall one\nsay, In the Lord have I righteousness and strength: even to him shall\nmen come; and all that are incensed against him shall be ashamed. In\nthe Lord shall all the seed of Israel be justified, and shall glory.'\n'Hearken unto me, O house of Jacob, and all the remnant of the house\nof Israel. Even to your old age, I am he; and even to hoar hairs will\nI carry you: I have made, and I will bear; even I will carry, and will\ndeliver you.' Isa. 45:22; 46:3.\n\n \"'Thus saith the Lord; I, even I, will both search my sheep, and\nseek them out. As a shepherd seeketh out his flock in the day that he\nis among his sheep that are scattered; so will I seek out my sheep,\nand will deliver them out of all places where they have been scattered\nin the cloudy and dark day. And I will bring them out from the people,\nand gather them to their own land, and feed them upon the mountains of\nIsrael by the rivers, and in all the inhabited places of the country.\nAnd I will feed them in a good pasture, and upon the high mountains of\nIsrael shall their fold be: there shall they lie in a good fold, and\nin a fat pasture shall they feed upon the mountains of Israel. I will\nfeed my flock, and I will cause them to lie down, saith the Lord God.\nI will seek that which was lost, and bring again that which was driven\naway, and will bind up that which was broken, and will strengthen that\nwhich was sick.' Ezek. 34:11. He hath done it, I am his witness: I,\nthe poor wanderer, the happy subject of this grace. 'And I will raise\nup for them a plant of renown,' my Jesus, 'and they shall be no 'more\nconsumed with hunger in the land, neither bear the shame of the\nheathen any more. Thus shall they know that I the Lord their God am\nwith them, and that they, even the house of Israel, are my people,\nsaith the Lord God. And ye my flock, the flock of my pasture, are men,\nand I am your God, saith the Lord God.' Ezek. 34:29. 'As the mountains\nare round about Jerusalem, so the Lord is round about his people from\nhenceforth, even for ever.' Psa. 125:2.\n\n \"'When the house of Israel dwelt in their own land, they defiled\nit by their own way and by their doings. And I scattered them among\nthe heathen, and they were dispersed through the countries; according\nto their ways and according to their doings I judged them. And when\nthey entered unto the heathen, whither they went, they profaned my\nholy name, when they said to them, These are the people of the Lord,\nand are gone forth out of his land. But I had pity for my holy name,\nwhich the house of Israel had profaned among the heathen, whither they\nwent. Therefore say unto the house of Israel, thus saith the Lord God:\nI do not this for your sakes, O house of Israel, but for my holy\nname's sake, which ye have profaned among the heathen, whither ye\nwent. And I will sanctify my great name, which was profaned among the\nheathen, which ye have profaned in the midst of them; and the heathen\nshall know that I am the Lord, saith the Lord God, when I shall be\nsanctified in you before their eyes. For I will take you from among\nthe heathen, and gather you out of all countries, and will bring you\ninto your own land. Then will I sprinkle clean water upon you, and ye\nshall be clean: from all your filthiness, and from all your idols,\nwill I cleanse you. A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit\nwill I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of\nyour flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my\nSpirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and ye shall\nkeep my judgments, and do them. I will also save you from all your\nuncleannesses: and I will call for the corn, and will increase it, and\nlay no famine upon you. And I will multiply the fruit of the tree, and\nthe increase of the field, that ye shall receive no more reproach of\nfamine among the heathen. Then shall ye remember your own evil ways,\nand your doings that were not good, and shall loathe yourselves in\nyour own sight for your iniquities, and for your abominations. Not for\nyour sakes do I this, saith the Lord God, be it known unto you: be\nashamed and confounded for your own ways, O house of Israel.'\nEzek. 36:17, etc.\"\n\n\n EZEKIEL 16:63; 36:32.\n\n A SCRIPTURE PARAPHRASE BY D. B----.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; for, born unclean,\n The slaves of Satan and of sin.\n I saw no comeliness in you,\n To bid my grace such wonders do.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; for when my love\n And grace should your affections move,\n The working of an evil heart\n Still makes you from my truth depart.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; for, bold and blind,\n To lust and avarice inclined,\n Each shadowy idol you obey,\n Disowning my paternal sway.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; with heaven in view,\n For sin you sell your souls anew;\n You barter, for a gilded bait,\n The joys of an eternal state.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; for though you eyed\n The cross of Christ on which he died,\n You scorn his love for worldly ends,\n And wound him in the house of friends.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; with Jesus' name,\n You put him to an open shame;\n And by your sins, consent again\n To have the dear Redeemer slain.\n\n \"Not for your sakes; 'tis my free grace\n That grants you pardon, life, and peace;\n And works a change on all your frame,\n And binds you to adore my name.\n\n \"Not for my sake!--I hail the sound;\n Let power of grace my pride confound:\n Salvation is a work divine;\n Confusion and the shame be mine.\n\n \"Not for my sake!--did I but trust\n To weakness, vanity, and dust,\n I ne'er could reach the heavenly prize,\n Nor hope a mansion in the skies.\n\n \"Not for my sake!--yet save and call;\n Let Jesus be my all in all:\n When glory comes I'll self disown,\n And grace, free grace shall wear the crown.\"\n\n \"'Praise ye the Lord. O give thanks unto the Lord; for he is\ngood: for his mercy endureth for ever.' Psalm 106:1.\n\n \"'Remember me, O Lord, with the favor that thou bearest unto thy\npeople: O visit me with thy salvation, that I may see the good of thy\nchosen, that I may rejoice in the gladness of thy nation, that I may\nglory with thine inheritance.' Psalm 106:4, 5.\n\n \"'At that time ye were without Christ, being aliens from the\ncommonwealth of Israel, and strangers from the covenants of promise,\nhaving no hope, and without God in the world; but now, in Christ\nJesus, ye who sometime were far off, are made nigh by the blood of\nChrist.' Eph. 2:12, 13.\n\n \"'Lord, thou hast heard the desire of the humble: thou wilt\nprepare their heart, thou wilt cause thine ear to hear: to judge the\nfatherless and the oppressed, that the man of the earth may no more\noppress.' Psalm 10:17.\n\n \"'Thou shalt remember all the way which the Lord thy God led thee\nthese forty years in the wilderness, to humble thee, to prove thee, to\nknow what was in thy heart, whether thou wouldest keep his\ncommandments, or no. And he humbled thee, and suffered thee to hunger,\nand fed thee with manna, which thou knewest not, neither did thy\nfathers know; that he might make thee know that man doth not live by\nbread only, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of the\nLord doth man live. Thy raiment waxed not old upon thee, neither did\nthy foot swell, these forty years.'\n\n \"'Thou shalt also consider in thy heart, that as a man chasteneth\nhis son, so the Lord thy God chasteneth thee. Therefore thou shalt\nkeep the commandments of the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways, and to\nfear him.' Deut. 8:2-6.\n\n \"'Thou, God, seest me.' Gen. 16:13.\n\n \"'Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who\nhath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in\nChrist; according as he hath chosen us in him before the foundation of\nthe world, that we should be holy and without blame before him in\nlove: having predestinated us to the adoption of sons by Jesus Christ\nto himself, according to the good pleasure of his will, to the praise\nof the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the\nBeloved; in whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness\nof sins, according to the riches of his grace; wherein he hath\nabounded towards us in all wisdom and prudence; having made known unto\nus the mystery of his will, according to his good pleasure which he\nhath purposed in himself: that in the dispensation of the fulness of\ntimes he might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which\nare in heaven, and which are on earth; even in him, in whom also we\nhave obtained an inheritance, being predestinated according to the\npurpose of him who worketh all things after the counsel of his own\nwill: that we should be to the praise of his glory, who first trusted\nin Christ.' Eph. 1:3-12.\n\n \"'God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he\nloved us, even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together\nwith Christ, (by grace ye are saved,) and hath raised us up together,\nand made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus; that in\nthe ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace, in\nhis kindness towards us, through Christ Jesus. For by grace are ye\nsaved, through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of\nGod: not of works, lest any man should boast; for we are his\nworkmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath\nbefore ordained that we should walk in them. Now therefore ye,'\nGentiles, 'are no more strangers and foreigners, but fellow-citizens\nwith the saints, and of the household of God; and are built upon the\nfoundation of the apostles and prophets, Jesus Christ himself being\nthe chief corner-stone; in whom all the building fitly framed together\ngroweth unto a holy temple in the Lord: in whom ye also are builded\ntogether for a habitation of God through the Spirit.' Eph. 2:4, etc.\n'I,' Paul, 'bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, of\nwhom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, that he would\ngrant you according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened\nwith might by his Spirit in the inner man; that Christ may dwell in\nyour hearts by faith; that ye being rooted and grounded in love, may\nbe able to comprehend with all saints, what is the breadth, and\nlength, and depth, and height, and to know the love of Christ, which\npasseth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of\nGod. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all\nthat we can ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,\nunto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus, throughout all ages,\nworld without end. Amen.' Eph. 3:14-21.\n\n \"'I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk\nworthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, with all lowliness and\nmeekness, with long-suffering, forbearing one another in love;\nendeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.\nThere is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope\nof your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father\nof all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all. But unto\nevery one of us is given grace according to the measure of the gift of\nChrist. That we may grow up into him in all things, which is the head,\neven Christ: from whom the whole body fitly joined together and\ncompacted by that which every joint supplieth'--ministers and people\nin the use of all appointed means--'according to the effectual working\nin the measure of every part, maketh increase of the body to the\nedifying of itself in love.' Eph. 4:1, etc.\n\n \"'I am the vine, ye are the branches; he that abideth in me and I\nin him, the same bringeth forth much fruit; for without me ye can do\nnothing.' John 15:5, 7.\n\n \"'And Moses said, The Lord heareth your murmurings that ye murmur\nagainst him; and what are we? your murmurings are not against us, but\nagainst the Lord. And Moses said, This is the bread which the Lord\nhath given you to eat. And the children of Israel did eat manna until\nthey came unto the borders of the land of Canaan.' Exodus 16.\n\n \"'I am the living bread which came down from heaven: if any man\neat of this bread, he shall live for ever: and the bread that I will\ngive is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world. He that\neateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, dwelleth in me, and I in him.\nThe words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.'\nJohn 6:51, etc.\n\n \"'For of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us\nwisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption.' 1 Cor.\n1:30.\n\n \"'Seeing then that we have a great High-priest, who is passed\ninto the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our\nprofession. For we have not a High-priest who cannot be touched with\nthe feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as\nwe are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne\nof grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of\nneed.' Heb. 4:14. 'For this is the covenant that I will make with the\nhouse of Israel after those days, saith the Lord: I will put my laws\ninto their mind, and write them in their hearts; and I will be to them\na God, and they shall be to me a people: and they shall not teach\nevery man his neighbor, and every man his brother, saying, Know the\nLord; for all shall know me, from the least to the greatest. For I\nwill be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their\niniquities will I remember no more. In that he saith, A new covenant,\nhe hath made the first old. Now that which decayeth and waxeth old is\nready to vanish away.' Heb. 8:10-13.\n\n \"'This is the record, that God hath given to us eternal life, and\nthis life is in his Son. He that hath the Son hath life; and he that\nhath not the Son of God, hath not life.' 1 John 5:11, 12. Thanks be to\nGod for his unspeakable gift.' 2 Cor. 9:15.\n\n \"'Truly my soul waiteth upon God; from him cometh my salvation.\nHe is my defence; I shall not be greatly moved. My soul, wait thou\nonly upon God, for my expectation is from him: he only is my rock and\nmy salvation; he is my defence; I shall not be moved. In God is my\nsalvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge is in\nGod.' Psa. 62:1-7.\"\n\n _______________\n\n REST.\n\n \"'Thus the heavens and the earth were finished: and on the\nseventh day God ended his work which he had made, and he rested the\nseventh day from all his work which he had made; and God blessed the\nseventh day, and sanctified it, because that in it he had rested from\nall his work that he had created and made.' Genesis 2:1-3.\n\n \"'And Moses said, To-morrow is the rest of the holy Sabbath unto\nthe Lord. So the people rested on the seventh day.' Exodus 16:23, 30.\n\n \"'And the women followed after, and beheld the sepulchre, and how\nhis body was laid. And they returned, and prepared spices and\nointments; and rested the Sabbath day according to the commandment.'\nLuke 23:55, 56.\n\n \"Christ rested in the tomb of Joseph the last Sabbath under the\nlaw; but the evening and the morning were the first day. On that\nmorning he closed his work of humiliation, manifested his victory over\ndeath--the curse denounced--by rising from the tomb, and rested on the\nfirst day of the week from all his humiliation work; his death,\nburial, and rest in the grave on the seventh day being the last part\nof that work.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"My God, thy service well demands\n The remnant of my days:\n Why is this feeble life preserved,\n But to repeat thy praise?\n\n \"Thine arms of everlasting love\n Do this weak frame sustain,\n While life is hovering o'er the grave,\n And nature sinks with pain.\n\n \"Thou, when the pains of death assail,\n Wilt chase the fears of hell,\n And teach my pale and quivering lips\n Thy matchless grace to tell.\n\n \"Calmly I'll lay my fainting head\n On thy dear faithful breast:\n Pleased to obey my Father's call\n To his eternal rest.\n\n \"Into thy hands, my Saviour God,\n Do I my soul resign,\n In firm dependence on that truth\n That made salvation mine.\"\n\n\n THE INWARD WARFARE.\n\n \"Strange and mysterious is my life;\n What opposites I feel within:\n A stable peace, a constant strife,\n The rule of grace, the power of sin.\n Too often I am captive led,\n Yet daily triumph in my Head.\n\n \"I prize the privilege of prayer;\n But O, what backwardness to pray:\n Though on the Lord I cast my care,\n I feel its burden every day.\n I seek his will in all I do,\n Yet find my own is working too.\n\n \"I call the promises mine own,\n And prize them more than mines of gold;\n Yet, though their sweetness I have known,\n They leave me unimpressed and cold.\n One hour upon the truth I feed;\n The next, I know not what I read.\n\n \"I love the holy day of rest,\n When Jesus meets his gathered saints:\n Sweet day, of all the week the best,\n For its return my spirit pants;\n Yet often, through my unbelief,\n It proves a day of guilt and grief.\n\n \"While on my Saviour I rely,\n I know my foes shall lose their aim;\n And therefore dare their power defy,\n Assured of conquest through his name;\n But soon my confidence is slain,\n And all my fears return again.\n\n \"Thus different powers within me strive,\n And death and sin by turns prevail.\n I grieve, rejoice, decline, revive,\n And victory hangs in doubtful scale;\n But Jesus has his promise passed,\n That grace shall overcome at last.\"\n\n _______________\n\n FLESH AND SPIRIT.\n\n \"What different powers of grace and sin\n Attend our mortal state:\n I hate the thoughts that work within,\n Yet do the works I hate.\n\n \"Now I complain, and groan, and die,\n While sin and Satan reign;\n Now raise my songs of triumph high,\n For grace prevails again.\n\n \"So darkness struggles with the light,\n Till perfect day arise;\n Water and fire maintain the fight,\n Until the weaker dies.\n\n \"Thus will the flesh and spirit strive,\n And vex and break my peace;\n But I shall quit this mortal life,\n And sin for ever cease.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Join all the names of love and power\n That ever men or angels bore;\n All are too mean to speak his worth,\n Or set Emmanuel's glory forth.\n\n \"But O, what condescending ways\n He takes to teach his heavenly grace:\n Mine eyes, with joy and wonder, see\n What forms of love he bears for me.\n\n \"The Angel of the covenant stands,\n With his commission in his hands;\n Sent from his Father's milder throne,\n To make his great salvation known.\n\n \"Great Prophet, let me bless thy name;\n By thee the joyful tidings came,\n Of wrath appeased and sins forgiven,\n Of hell subdued, and peace with heaven.\n\n \"My bright Example, and my Guide,\n I would be walking by thy side;\n Oh, let me never run astray,\n Nor follow the forbidden way.\n\n \"I love my Shepherd, he shall keep\n My wandering soul among his sheep;\n He feeds his flock, he tells their names,\n And in his bosom bears the lambs.\n\n \"My Surety undertakes my cause,\n Answering his Father's broken laws:\n Behold my soul at freedom set,\n My Surety paid the dreadful debt.\n\n \"Jesus, my great High-priest, has died,\n I seek no sacrifice beside;\n His blood did once for all atone,\n And now it pleads before the throne.\n\n \"My Advocate appears on high,\n The Father lays his thunders by;\n Not all that earth or hell can say,\n Shall turn my Father's heart away.\n\n \"My Lord, my Conqueror, and my King,\n Thy sceptre and thy sword I sing;\n Thine is the victory, and I sit\n A joyful subject at thy feet.\n\n \"Aspire, my soul, to glorious deeds,\n The Captain of salvation leads;\n March on, nor fear to win the day,\n Though death and hell obstruct thy way.\n\n \"Though death and hell, and powers unknown,\n Put all their forms of mischief on,\n I shall be safe, for Christ displays\n Salvation in more sovereign ways.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Be this my one great business here,\n With holy trembling, holy fear,\n To make my calling sure;\n Thine utmost counsel to fulfil,\n And suffer all thy righteous will,\n And to the end endure.\n\n \"Then, Saviour, then my soul receive,\n Transported from this vale, to live,\n And reign with thee above:\n Where faith is sweetly lost in sight,\n And hope in full supreme delight,\n And everlasting love.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Hush, my distrustful heart,\n And cease to flow, my tears;\n For greater, Lord, thou art\n Than all my doubts and fears.\n Did Jesus once upon me shine?\n Then Jesus is for ever mine.\n\n \"Unchangeable his will,\n Whatever be my frame:\n My Saviour's heart is still\n Eternally the same.\n My soul through many changes goes,\n His love no variation knows.\n\n \"Thou, Lord, wilt carry on,\n And perfectly perform,\n The work thou hast begun\n In me, vile sinful worm.\n Mine own self-will brings grief and woe,\n But Jesus will not let me go.\n\n \"The bowels of thy grace,\n At first did freely move;\n And still I see thy face,\n And feel that God is love.\n Into thine arms my soul I cast;\n By sovereign mercy saved at last.\n\n \"The Priest and Ark now move\n To Jordan's gulfy strand;\n Come now in covenant love,\n Take firm thy promised stand:\n Only to me thy countenance show,\n I ask no more the Jordan through.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Come, let us join our cheerful songs\n With angels round the throne;\n Ten thousand thousand are their tongues,\n But all their joys are one.\n\n \"Worthy the Lamb that died, they cry,\n To be exalted thus;\n Worthy the Lamb, our souls reply,\n For he was slain for us.\n\n \"Jesus is worthy to receive\n Honor and power divine;\n And blessings, more than we can give,\n Be, Lord, for ever thine.\n\n \"The whole creation join in one,\n To bless the sacred name\n Of Him that sits upon the throne,\n And to adore the Lamb.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Give me the wings of faith, to rise\n Within the veil, and see\n The saints above, how great their joys,\n How bright their glories be.\n\n \"Once they were mourners here below,\n And wet their couch with tears;\n They wrestled hard, as we do now,\n With sins, and doubts, and fears.\n\n \"I ask them whence their victory came:\n They, with united breath,\n Ascribe their conquest to the Lamb,\n Their triumph to his death.\n\n \"They marked the footsteps that he trod;\n His zeal inspired their breast;\n And following their incarnate God,\n Possessed the promised rest.\n\n \"Our glorious Leader claims our praise,\n For his own pattern given;\n While the long cloud of witnesses\n Show the same path to heaven.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"With heart and hands, and lifted eyes,\n I'll praise thee while I've life and breath;\n And, while my loosened spirit flies,\n I'll gasp thy praise in very death.\n\n \"Faith fain would say, in cheerful mood,\n Thy name be glorified,\n By leading through the swelling flood,\n Or through the channel dried.\n\n \"If grace in time of need I have,\n And strength as is my day,\n I'll triumph through the foaming wave,\n As through the side-walled way.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"I'll praise my Maker while I've breath;\n And when my voice is lost in death,\n Praise shall employ my noblest powers;\n My days of praise shall ne'er be past,\n \"While life and thought and being last.\n And immortality endures.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"My God, indulge my humble claim;\n Thou art my hope, my joy, my rest;\n The glories that compose thy name\n Stand all engaged to make me blest.\n\n \"Thou great and good, thou just and wise,\n Thou art my Father and my God;\n And I am thine by sacred ties,\n Thy child, thy servant, bought with blood.\n\n \"With heart, and eyes, and lifted hands,\n For thee I long, to thee I look;\n As travellers in thirsty lands\n Pant for the cooling water-brook.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Jesus, the weary wanderer's rest,\n Give grace thy sovereign will to bear;\n With steadfast patience arm my breast,\n With holy love and lowly fear.\n\n \"Thankful, I take the cup from thee,\n Prepared and mingled by thy skill;\n Though bitter to the taste it be,\n It has a sovereign power to heal.\n\n \"Be thou a Rock of ages nigh;\n My saved soul on thee alone\n Shall safely rest, and fears shall fly,\n As clouds before the mid-day sun.\n\n \"Speak to my troubled conscience peace;\n Say to my trembling heart, Be still;\n My power thy strength and fortress is.\n Amen, to all thy sovereign will.\n\n \"O Death, where is thy sting? where now\n Thy boasted victory, O grave?\n Who shall contend with God, or who\n Condemn whom he delights to save.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"How sweet the name of Jesus sounds\n In a believer's ear:\n It soothes his sorrows, heals his wounds,\n And drives away his fear.\n\n \"It makes the wounded spirit whole,\n And calms the troubled breast;\n 'Tis manna to the hungry soul,\n And to the weary, rest.\n\n \"Dear Name, the Rock on which I build,\n My Shield and Hiding-place;\n My never failing Treasury, filled\n With boundless stores of grace:\n\n \"Jesus, my Shepherd, Husband, Friend,\n My Prophet, Priest, and King,\n My Lord, my Life, my Way, my End,\n Accept the praise I bring.\n\n \"Weak is the effort of my heart,\n And cold my warmest thought;\n But when I see thee as thou art,\n I'll praise thee as I ought.\n\n \"Till then I would thy love proclaim\n With every fleeting breath;\n And may the music of thy name\n Refresh my soul in death.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Amazing grace! how sweet the sound\n That saved a wretch like me:\n I once was lost, but now am found;\n Was blind, but now I see.\n\n \"'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,\n And grace my fears relieved:\n How precious did that grace appear\n The hour I first believed.\n\n \"Through many dangers, toils, and snares,\n Already I have come:\n 'Twas grace that brought me safe thus far,\n And grace will lead me home.\n\n \"Yes, when this heart and flesh shall fail,\n And mortal life shall cease,\n I shall possess, within the veil,\n A life of joy and peace.\"\n\n A swelling Jordan rolls between--\n A timid pilgrim, I;\n But grace shall order all the scene,\n And Christ himself be nigh.\n\n He shall roll back the foaming wave,\n Command the channel dry;\n No sting has death, no victory grave?\n With Jesus in my eye.\n\n \"Come, thou Fount of every blessing,\n Tune my heart to sing thy grace;\n Streams of mercy, never ceasing,\n Call for songs of endless praise.\n\n \"Teach me some melodious sonnet,\n Sung by flaming tongues above;\n Praise the mount, I'm fixed upon it--\n Mount of God's unchanging love.\n\n \"Here I raise my Ebenezer,\n Hither by thy help I'm come,\n And I hope, by thy good pleasure,\n Safely to arrive at home.\n\n \"Jesus sought me when a stranger,\n Wandering from the fold of God;\n He, to save my soul from danger,\n Interposed with precious blood.\n\n \"Oh, to grace how great a debtor\n Daily I'm constrained to be:\n Let that grace, Lord, like a fetter,\n Bind my wandering heart to thee.\n\n \"Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,\n Prone to leave the God I love;\n Here's my heart, O take and seal it,\n Seal it from thy courts above.\"\n\n _______________\n\n Eternal God, I bless thy name,\n The same thy power, thy grace the same;\n The tokens of thy friendly care\n Open and crown and close the year.\n\n I mid ten thousand dangers stand,\n Supported by thy gracious hand;\n And see, when I survey thy ways,\n Ten thousand monuments of grace.\n\n Thus far thine arm has led me on;\n Thus far I make thy mercy known;\n And while I tread this desert land,\n New mercies shall new songs demand.\n\n My grateful soul on Jordan's shore\n Shall raise one sacred pillar more;\n Then bear, in thy bright courts above,\n Inscriptions of immortal love.\n\n _______________\n\n No works to rest upon have I,\n No boast of moral dignity;\n If e'er I lisp a song of praise,\n Grace is the note my soul shall raise.\n\n 'Twas grace that quickened me when dead;\n 'Twas grace my soul to Jesus led,\n Grace brings me pardon for my sin,\n And grace subdues my lusts within.\n\n 'Tis grace that sweetens every cross,\n 'Tis grace supports in every loss;\n In Jesus' grace my soul is strong,\n Grace is my hope, and Christ my song.\n\n Thus, 'tis alone of grace I boast,\n And 'tis alone in grace I trust:\n For all that's past, grace is my theme,\n For what's to come 'tis still the same.\n\n And when I come to Jordan's shore,\n I'll raise one Ebenezer more;\n Th' ark of the covenant in my view,\n I'll sing of grace the Jordan through.\n\n _______________\n\n \"Is this the kind return,\n Are these the thanks we owe--\n Thus to abuse eternal love,\n Whence all our blessings flow?\n\n \"To what a stubborn frame\n Has sin reduced our mind!\n What strange rebellious wretches we,\n And God as strangely kind!\n\n \"Turn, turn us, mighty God!\n And mould our souls afresh;\n Break, sovereign grace, these hearts of stone,\n And give us hearts of flesh.\n\n \"Let past ingratitude\n Provoke our weeping eyes;\n And hourly, as new mercies fall,\n Let hourly thanks arise.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"O the sweet wonders of that cross,\n Where Christ my Saviour loved and died;\n Her noblest life my spirit draws,\n From his dear wounds and bleeding side.\n\n \"I would for ever speak his name,\n In sounds to mortal ears unknown;\n With angels join to praise the Lamb,\n And worship at his Father's throne.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Jesus, the vision of thy face\n Hath overpowering charms;\n Scarce shall I feel death's cold embrace,\n If Christ be in my arms.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"O glorious hour! O blest abode!\n I shall be near and like my God;\n And flesh and sin no more control\n The sacred pleasures of my soul.\"\n\n \"When in death's gloomy vale I tread,\n With joy e'en there I'll lift my head;\n From fear and dread he'll keep me free,\n His rod and staff shall comfort me.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Jesus, to thy dear faithful hand\n My naked soul I trust;\n My flesh but waits for thy command,\n To drop into the dust.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Before we quite forsake our clay,\n Or leave this dark abode,\n The wings of love bear us away\n To see our smiling God.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"O make it true, my Saviour God;\n Raise me all fears above;\n And when I think on Jesus' blood,\n Let my last pulse beat love.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"O for an overcoming faith,\n To cheer my dying hours;\n To triumph o'er the monster Death,\n And all his frightful powers.\n\n \"Joyful, with all the strength I have,\n My quivering lips should sing,\n 'Where is thy boasted victory, Grave,\n And where the monster's sting?'\n\n \"If sin be pardoned, I'm secure;\n Death has no sting beside;\n The law gives sin its damning power,\n But Christ, my Ransom, died.\n\n \"Now to the God of victory,\n Immortal thanks be paid;\n Who makes us conquerors while we die,\n Through Christ, our living Head.\"\n\n _______________\n\n All mortal vanities be gone,\n Nor tempt mine eyes, nor tire mine ears;\n Behold, amidst the eternal throne,\n A vision of the Lamb appears.\n\n All the assembling saints around,\n Fall worshipping before the Lamb;\n And in new songs of gospel sound,\n Address their honors to his name.\n\n Our voices join the heavenly strain,\n And with transporting pleasure sing,\n Worthy the Lamb that once was slain,\n Our blessed Prophet, Priest, and King.\n\n Thou hast redeemed our souls from hell,\n With thine invaluable blood;\n And wretches, that did once rebel,\n Are now made fav'rites of their God.\n\n Worthy for ever is the Lord,\n That died for treasons not his own,\n By every tongue to be adored,\n And dwell upon his Father's throne.\n\n _______________\n\n THE NEW TESTAMENT IN THE BLOOD OF CHRIST.\n\n \"The promise of my Father's love,\n Shall stand for ever good;\n He said, and gave his soul to death,\n And sealed it with his blood.\n\n \"To this dear covenant of thy word,\n I set my worthless name;\n I seal the engagement of the Lord,\n And make my humble claim.\n\n \"The light, and strength, and pardoning grace,\n And glory shall be mine;\n My life and soul, my heart and flesh,\n And all my powers are thine.\n\n \"I call that legacy mine own,\n Which Jesus did bequeath;\n 'Twas purchased with a dying groan,\n And ratified in death.\n\n \"Sweet is the memory of His name,\n Who blessed us in his will:\n And to his testament of love\n Made his own life the seal.\n\n \"To him that washed me in his blood,\n Be everlasting praise;\n Salvation, honor, glory, power,\n Eternal as his days.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Blest be the Father, and his love,\n To which celestial source we owe\n Rivers of endless joys above,\n And rills of comfort here below.\n\n \"Glory to the great Son of God;\n From his dear wounded body rolls\n A precious stream of vital blood,\n Pardon and life for dying souls.\n\n \"We give thee, sacred Spirit, praise,\n Who in our hearts of sin and woe\n Mak'st living springs of grace arise,\n And into boundless glory flow.\n\n \"Thus God the Father, God the Son,\n And God the Spirit, we adore;\n The sea of life and love unknown,\n Without a bottom or a shore.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Let me but hear my Saviour say,\n Strength shall be equal to thy day;\n Then I rejoice in deep distress,\n Leaning on all-sufficient grace.\n\n \"I glory in infirmity,\n That Christ's own power may rest on me:\n When I am weak, then am I strong;\n Grace is my shield, and Christ my song.\n\n \"I can do all things, or can bear\n All sufferings, if my Lord be there;\n Sweet pleasures mingle with the pains,\n While his strong hand my head sustains.\n\n \"Faith has an overcoming power,\n It triumphs in the dying hour;\n Christ is our life, our joy, our hope,\n Nor can we sink with such a prop.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Jesus, I love thy charming name,\n 'Tis music to mine ear;\n Fain would I sound it out so loud\n That heaven and earth should hear.\n\n \"Yes, thou art precious to my soul,\n My transport and my trust;\n My Saviour, Shepherd, Husband, Friend,\n No other good I boast.\n\n \"All my capacious powers can wish,\n In thee doth richly meet;\n Not to mine eye is light so dear,\n Nor friendship half so sweet.\n\n \"Thy grace still dwells upon my heart,\n And sheds its fragrance there:\n The noblest balm of all my wounds,\n The cordial of my care.\n\n \"I'll speak the honors of thy name\n With my last faltering breath;\n Then speechless clasp thee in my arms,\n The antidote of death.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Grace, 'tis a charming sound,\n Harmonious to my ear;\n Heaven with the echo shall resound,\n And all the earth shall hear.\n\n \"Grace first contrived the way\n To save rebellious man;\n And all the steps _that_ grace display,\n Which drew the wondrous plan.\n\n \"Grace taught my wandering feet\n To tread the heavenly road;\n And new supplies each hour I meet,\n While pressing on to God.\n\n \"Grace all the work shall crown,\n Through everlasting days;\n It lays in heaven the topmost stone,\n And well deserves the praise.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"My God, the spring of all my joys,\n The life of my delights,\n The glory of my brightest days,\n And comfort of my nights:\n\n \"In darkest shades, if thou appear,\n My dawning is begun;\n Thou art my soul's sweet Morning-star,\n And thou my rising Sun.\n\n \"The opening heavens around me shine\n With beams of sacred bliss,\n While Jesus shows his heart is mine,\n And whispers I am his.\n\n \"My soul would leave this heavy clay,\n At that transporting word;\n Run up with joy the shining way,\n T' embrace my dearest Lord.\n\n \"Fearless of hell and ghastly death,\n I'd break through every foe;\n The wings of love, and arms of faith,\n Should bear me conqueror through.\"\n\n _______________\n\n \"Backward with humble shame I look,\n On my original;\n How is my nature dashed and broke,\n In our first father's fall.\n\n \"To all that's good averse and blind,\n But prone to all that's ill;\n What dreadful darkness veils my mind,\n How obstinate my will.\n\n \"Conceived in sin: O wretched state;\n Before I drew my breath,\n My first young pulse began to beat\n Iniquity and death.\n\n \"How strong in my degenerate blood\n The old corruption reigns;\n And mingling with the crooked flood,\n Wanders through all my veins.\n\n \"Yet, mighty God, thy wondrous love\n Can make my nature clean;\n While Christ and grace prevail above\n The tempter, death, and sin.\n\n \"The second Adam shall restore\n The ruins of the first;\n Hosanna to that sovereign power,\n That new-creates our dust.\"\n\n _______________\n\n JORDAN.*\n\n Joshua 1:11, chapter 3; Psalm 23:4; 73:24.\n\n*The three following effusions by Mrs. Graham, constituting a\n part of her \"Provision,\" were found in a separate paper after her\n funeral sermon was preached. The hymn of Newton which she had annexed\n to the first, was selected by Dr. Mason and sung on that occasion; and\n the circumstances described at the beginning of the third, page 434,\n occurred at her death, as narrated in the memoir, though the existence\n of this paper was then unknown.\n\n The solemn hour, my soul, draws near,\n The holy ark and priests appear;\n They forward move to Jordan's flood,\n The type, thou knowest, thy covenant God.\n\n The signal too to thee is known;\n Obey, remove, and follow on;\n The ark appears, thy hallowed guide;\n Shrink not, but face the rolling tide.\n\n The waves toss high their foaming heads,\n But can'st thou perish? Jesus leads.\n This way before I ne'er did pass,\n But Jesus thy forerunner has.\n\n When all its banks it overflowed,\n All nature wrapt in midnight cloud;\n While darkness held its awful power,\n And all God's billows passed him o'er.\n\n The waves for him must not divide,\n Deep calls to deep on every side;\n Around his head the surges roll,\n And rush into his inmost soul.\n\n He was the sufferer in my stead,\n The curse for sin lay on his head;\n The law's demands came like a flood,\n My Surety met them with his blood.\n\n Till every tittle had been paid,\n Till due atonement had been made,\n No beam appeared of heavenly grace,\n A cloud concealed his Father's face.\n\n From brim to bottom he drank up\n Of wrath the deep mysterious cup;\n This Jordan passed, he rose on high,\n And captive led captivity.\n\n Justice now fully satisfied,\n The law now honored, magnified,\n At God's right hand he takes his place,\n Executor of covenant grace.\n\n Crowned by Jehovah's firm decree\n With universal sovereignty,\n All nature owns his powerful sway--\n He speaks, the elements obey.\n\n The emblem then thou may'st pursue,\n And safely pass this Jordan through;\n The priests but touch the watery space,\n When, lo, the floods desert their place.\n\n They gather up upon a heap,\n Leave dry the channel of the deep;\n The ark and priests there take their stand,\n And beckon thee to leave the land.\n\n I come, my best Beloved, I come;\n Now lead me to our Father's home;\n On thy dear person fix mine eye,\n And faith firm footing shall supply.\n\n I fear no ill while thou art near;\n But let thy voice salute my ear,\n Should spirits faint and 'scape the sigh,\n With these sweet words, \"Fear not; 'tis I.\"\n\n With courage fresh my soul shall tread\n On faith's firm ground where thou dost lead;\n While still upon thy gracious face\n My steady eye maintains its place.\n\n And now, my Joshua, choose, and lay\n The stones in Jordan's middle way;\n Let them o'ertop the flowing wave,\n Memorial of thy power to save.\n\n For, once a suit I did prefer,\n With feeble hope and trembling fear,\n That I might have a Pisgah view,\n In Jordan's swells, of Canaan new.\n\n Thy softened glory let me see,\n Then cause thy face to shine on me;\n And tune my heart, and tune my voice,\n And language furnish to rejoice.\n\n That all around may lend their tongue,\n And sweetly join my dying song;\n Then, Newton, saved by grace like me,\n We'll sing of sovereign grace with thee.\n\n _______________\n\n *\"Let us love, and sing, and wonder,\n Let us praise the Saviour's name;\n He has hushed the law's loud thunder,\n He has quenched mount Sinai's flame;\n He has washed us in his blood,\n He has brought us nigh to God.\n\n*Olney Hymns, 82, book 3.\n\n \"Let us love the Lord who bought us,\n Pitied us when enemies;\n Called us by his grace, and taught us;\n Gave us ears, and gave us eyes:\n He has wafted us in his blood,\n He presents our souls to God.\n\n \"Let us sing, though strong temptation\n Threaten hard to bear us down:\n For the Lord, our strong salvation,\n Holds in view the conqueror's crown,\n He who washed us in his blood,\n Soon shall bring us home to God.\n\n \"Let us wonder, grace and justice\n Join and point to mercy's store;\n When through grace, in Christ our trust is,\n Justice smiles, and asks no more.\n He who washed us in his blood,\n Has secured our way to God.\n\n \"Let us praise, and join the chorus\n Of the saints enthroned on high;\n Here they trusted him before us,\n Now their praises fill the sky.\n Thou hast washed us in thy blood,\n Thou art worthy, Lamb of God.\n\n \"Hark, the name of Jesus sounded\n Loud from golden harps above;\n On that rock our hopes are founded;\n Sovereign grace, and sovereign love.\n We shall conquer through his blood,\n Kings and priests be made to God.\"\n NEWTON\n\n\n HEAVEN.\n\n To be where thou my Saviour art,\n To see, and be conformed to thee,\n Perfect in holiness this heart;\n _This; this_ is heaven itself to me.\n\n To see thee in thy glory, Lord,\n Thy Father's glory and thy own;\n The eternal, the incarnate Word,\n Adored upon his Father's throne.\n\n To see as seen, to know as known,\n My Saviour in my flesh and blood;\n To be made like him, with him one,\n I in him, and he in God.\n\n The holy, holy, holy One,\n Who was, and is, and is to come,\n The earth his footstool, heaven his throne,\n The church his bride, he her Bridegroom.\n\n Angels and elders, earth and heaven,\n Are summoned to unseal the book;\n But silent all, no answer given,\n None worthy found therein to look.\n\n But Judah's Lion, David's Son,\n And David's Root, the great I AM,\n Appears upon his Father's throne,\n As slain for sacrifice, the Lamb.\n\n He takes the book he can unseal;\n He worthy is, and he has power\n God's secret counsels to reveal,\n And to fulfil each in its hour.\n\n The heavenly host united fall\n In humble worship at his feet;\n One glorious theme inspires them all,\n The joy is full, the concert sweet.\n\n New odors to the throne ascend,\n In accents new their praises soar;\n Each finds in each a glowing friend,\n And all the God of all adore.\n\n And shall I join that prostrate throng,\n In love's ecstatic heaven-taught lays,\n With powers expanded, that new song\n Hymn to the Lamb's exalted praise?\n\n \"Worthy art thou to take the book,\n And loose the seals, and read therein,\n God's holy mysteries to unlock;\n Worthy art thou, for thou wast slain.\n\n \"Thou hast redeemed us with thy blood,\n From every nation of the earth;\n And made us kings and priests to God,\n And sharers of a heavenly birth.\"\n\n Myriads of angels stand around,\n Uniting in the loud acclaim;\n And fill the temple with the sound\n Of our Redeemer's gentle name.\n\n \"Worthy the Lamb that once was slain,\n A sacrifice for every sin,\n All power and glory to obtain,\n And universal empire win.\"\n\n Heaven, earth, and sea shall swell the tone\n Of fervent universal praise;\n And grateful joy around the throne,\n Its voice from age to age shall raise.\n\n In all these myriads, is there one\n Who had on earth so much forgiven?\n And shall I reach their highest tone\n Of love to Jesus? THIS IS HEAVEN.\n\n And when this breast to heave shall cease,\n And heart and lungs are hushed to peace,\n Some friendly hand the eyelids close,\n And leave the clay to short repose.\n\n Still on your knees be thanks expressed,\n According as the Lord has blessed;\n This tongue, then mute, can now foretell\n Jesus shall have done all things well.\n\n Should the great Sovereign will it so,\n That I in secret with him go,\n 'T will be enough that He stands by,\n He all my wants will well supply.\n\n Upon his dear, his faithful breast,\n My heart and head shall safely rest;\n The fluttering pulse and bursting sigh,\n He'll soothe with, \"Fear not; it is I.\"\n\n Into his hands my spirit I'll breathe,\n Inhaling life from him in death;\n Though none should see, faith can foretell\n My Jesus shall do all things well.\n\n Though he deny my half-formed prayer,\n Well may I cast on Him my care;\n All things are mine, or life or death;\n In praise of Him I'll spend my breath.\n\n Be this my only wish beside,\n That God's great name be glorified,\n What me concerns faith can foretell,\n My Jesus shall do all things well.\n\n\n WIDOWHOOD.\n\n WRITTEN IN THE ISLAND OF ANTIGUA\n SHORTLY AFTER DR. GRAHAM'S DEATH.\n\n PART I.\n\n Hail; thou state of widowhood,\n State of those that mourn to God;\n Who, from earthly comforts torn,\n Only live to pray and mourn.\n\n Meanest of the number, I\n For my dear companion sigh;\n Patiently my loss deplore,\n Mourn for one that mourns no more.\n\n Me my consort hath outrun,\n Out of sight he quite has gone;\n He his course has finished here,\n First come to the sepulchre.\n\n Following on with earnest haste,\n Till my mourning days are past,\n I my partner's steps pursue,\n I shall soon be happy too;\n\n Find the ease for which I pant,\n Gain the only good I want;\n Quietly lay down my head,\n Sink into my earthy bed.\n\n There my flesh shall rest in hope,\n Till the quickened dust mount up,\n When to glorious life I'll rise,\n To meet my husband in the skies.\n\n\n PART II.\n\n Happy they who trust in Jesus,\n Jesus turns our loss to gain;\n Still his balmy mercies ease us,\n Sweeten all our grief and pain.\n\n When he calls our friends t' inherit\n All the glories of the blest,\n He assures the widowed spirit,\n \"Thou shalt quickly be at rest.\"\n\n Though my flesh and spirit languish,\n Let me not too much complain;\n Sure at last t' outlive my anguish,\n Sure to find my friend again.\n\n Ransomed from a world of sorrow,\n He to-day is taken home;\n I shall be released to-morrow--\n Come, my dear Redeemer, come.\n\n From my sanctified distresses,\n Now, or when thou wilt, receive;\n Grant with him in thine embraces,\n After all my deaths, to live.\n\n\n PART III.\n\n Hail, holy, holy, holy Lord,\n Mysterious Three in One!\n For ever be thy name adored,\n Thy will for ever done.\n\n For this alone on earth I wait,\n To glorify my God;\n And suffer, since thou will'st, the state\n Of sacred widowhood.\n\n And may I, in thy strength, fulfil\n My awful character;\n And prove thine acceptable will,\n And do thy pleasure here;\n\n The children to thyself restore,\n Whom thou to me hast given;\n And rule my house with all my power,\n And train them up for heaven.\n\n Be this my hospitable care:\n The stranger to receive,\n The burden of thy church to bear,\n And all their wants relieve;\n\n My labor of unwearied love\n With pleasure to repeat,\n My faith unto thy saints to prove,\n And gladly wash their feet.\n\n The servant of thy servants bless\n With active earnest zeal;\n And every work of righteousness\n I shall with joy fulfil.\n\n\n LINES,\n\nOccasioned by viewing the portrait of Mrs. Graham, prefixed to the\n first edition of her memoir. By the late Mrs. Margaret Brown,\n daughter of Rev. Dr. John Mason.\n\n While in this faded form I trace\n The features which I loved so well,\n Remembrance brings each mental grace\n Within its hallowed shrine to dwell.\n\n For I have seen that darkened eye\n In all the fire of genius roll,\n With eagle-gaze explore the sky,\n Or with a keener glance descry\n The secret workings of the soul.\n\n And I have seen this pallid cheek\n Suffused with feeling's richest glow;\n And virtue's brightest halo deck\n With sacred charms these locks of snow.\n\n And on these lips in silence closed,\n With rapt attention oft I hung,\n And heard those wondrous truths disclosed\n Which sages taught or seraphs sung.\n\n And I have known this withered hand\n Extended wide the poor to bless;\n And this contracted breast expand\n With generous schemes to aid distress.\n\n And now, though far removed from earth\n And every scene of mortal pain,\n This dear memorial of her worth\n Shall many a drooping heart sustain.\n\n Still shall it dry the widow's tear,\n The hapless orphan's want supply,\n Guide to a blessed asylum here,\n And point to happier realms on high.\n\n My father's friend--how poor the praise,\n By his unworthy offspring given,\n Who thus records, in humble lays,\n What angels registered in heaven.\n\nFRANKFORT, Kentucky, August, 1816.\n\n\n\n\n One hundred dollars was paid by John W. Hamersley, Esq. of New\nYork, towards perpetuating this volume.\n\n\n\n\n The American Tract Society,\n\n PUBLISH\n\n THE RELIGIOUS (OR PASTOR'S) LIBRARY,\n\nComprising 25 standard volumes 12mo, at $10. Including some of\nthe best practical works of the 17th century; THE EVIDENCES OF\nCHRISTIANITY; CHRISTIAN MEMOIRS; and D'AUBIGNES HISTORY OF THE\nREFORMATION.\n\n THE EVANGELICAL FAMILY LIBRARY,\n\nOf 15 volumes, 18mo, price $5 50; with 21 additional volumes,\nbound to match this library. Price of the 36 volumes, $13 00.\n\n THE YOUTH'S LIBRARY,\n\nOf 70 volumes, at $10, comprising Hannah More's CHEAP REPOSITORY,\n8 volumes, and an invaluable collection of reading for the young; with\n255 highly finished engravings.\n\n BEAUTIFULLY ILLUSTRATED BOOKS FOR CHILDREN,\n\nIn neatly enveloped packets; or bound in attractive CHILDREN'S\nLIBRARIES. Also a packet of 54 attractive PICTURE-CARDS.\n\nThe energies of the Society are directed to the one object of\nissuing and circulating the best evangelical publications, at barely\nremunerating prices. Every Christian Parent is here provided with safe\nand instructive reading for his children.\n\n The American Messenger,\n\nIssued monthly to 200,000 families, at 25 cents single six for $1;\ntwenty for $3; forty for $5.\n\n The Child's Paper,\n\nIs a gem welcomed monthly in more than 275,000 families. Ten\ncopies for $1; fifty for $4 50; one hundred for $8. Payable in\nadvance.\n\n TO BE HAD AT\n\n150 Nassau-street, New York; 28 Cornhill, Boston; and in other\nprincipal cities and towns.\n\n\n\n\n INTERESTING BOOKS\n FOR SALE AT\n 150 NASSAU ST., NEW YORK: 28 CORNHILL, BOSTON.\n\n _______________\n\n MEMOIR OF REV. JUSTIN EDWARDS, D.D.\n D'AUBIGNES HISTORY OF THE REFORMATION, 5 vols.\n BUNYAN'S PILGRIM'S PROGRESS.\n NELSON'S CAUSE AND CURE OF INFIDELITY.\n ANECDOTES FOR THE FAMILY.\n SABBATH MANUAL.\n CHALMERS' ASTRONOMICAL DISCOURSES.\n THE GODLY PASTOR; OR, LIFE OF REV. JEREMIAH HALLOCK.\n LADY HUNTINGTON AND HER FRIENDS.\n THE PASTOR'S WIFE; OR, MRS. MARTHA SHERMAN.\n BACKUS ON REGENERATION.\n ROMAINE'S LIFE OF FAITH.\n ANXIOUS INQUIRER. CHRISTIAN PROGRESS.\n YOUNG MAN FROM HOME.\n DR. SPRAGUE'S LETTERS TO A DAUGHTER.\n TEMPERANCE MANUAL. THE BIBLE TRUE.\n SCRIPTURE BIOGRAPHY. 10 VOLS.\n HANNAH MORE'S REPOSITORY TRACTS. 8 VOLS.\n THE ILLUSTRATED BIBLE PRIMER.\n\n ALSO,\n\n A LARGE ASSORTMENT OF OTHER BOOKS,\n MANY OF THEM BEAUTIFULLY ILLUSTRATED.\n\n\n\n\n PUBLISHED BY THE\n AMERICAN TRACT SOCIETY.\n NEW YORK: 150 NASSAU-ST. BOSTON: 28 CORNHILL.\n\n _______________\n\n Standard Evangelical Works.\n\n FLAVEL'S REDEMPTION,\n In three volumes, comprising,\n\n THE FOUNTAIN OF LIFE; THE METHOD OF GRACE,\n Price 55 cents, each;\n\n AND\n\n CHRIST KNOCKING AT THE DOOR. Price 50 cents;\n $1 60 the set.\n\n BAXTER'S SAINTS' REST,\n Large type for the aged, price 60 cents,\n\n BAXTER'S REFORMED PASTOR,\n With preface by Bishop Wilson of Calcutta, price 45 cents.\n\n BAXTER'S TREATISE ON CONVERSION,\n 408 pages, 12mo, price 50 cents.\n\n ATONEMENT AND JUSTIFICATION,\n From the writings of Andrew Fuller, 12mo, 50 cents.\n\n ALLEINE'S HEAVEN OPENED,\n Or the Riches of the Covenant of Grace; 308 pages, 12mo, 50 cents.\n\n THE RICHES OF BUNYAN;\n Gems from his works, with preface by Rev. Dr. William R. Williams;\n 488 pages, 12mo, price 55 cents.\n\n FAMILY TESTAMENT AND PSALMS,\n With Notes and Instructions by Dr. Edwards, 70 cents.\n\n D'AUBIGNE'S HISTORY OF THE GREAT REFORMATION,\n Revised by the author; 5 volumes, with portraits; price 2 20.\n\n JAY'S MORNING EXERCISES. Price 75 cents.\n\n CHALMERS' ASTRONOMICAL DISCOURSES,\n 263 pages, 12mo, 45 cents.\n\n BACKUS ON REGENERATION. 184 pages, 18mo, 15 cents.\n\n ROMAINE'S LIFE OF FAITH. 185 pages, 18mo, 15 cents.\n\n And numerous kindred works contained in the\n Religious and Family Libraries.","title":"The Power of Faith: Exemplified In The Life And Writings Of The Late Mrs. Isabella Graham.","tradition":"scripture-revelation","translated_text":null,"word_count":124095}