{"collection":"scripture-revelation","full_text_available":true,"graph_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/api/page/gutenberg_17826/graph","html_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/page/gutenberg_17826","id":"gutenberg_17826","license":"Public Domain (US)","rights_basis":"gutenberg_metadata_copyright_false","source":"gutenberg","source_url":"https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/17826","summary":null,"tags":["African American Methodists -- United States -- Biography","African Americans -- Biography","African Americans -- Religion","Category: Biographies","Category: History - American","Category: Religion/Spirituality","Enslaved persons -- Maryland -- Biography","Enslaved persons' writings, American","Methodist women -- United States -- Biography","Old Elizabeth, 1766-","Slavery -- Maryland -- History -- 18th century","Society of Friends"],"text":"Produced by Suzanne Shell, Sankar Viswanathan, and the\nOnline Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n                                MEMOIR\n\n                                  OF\n\n                            OLD ELIZABETH,\n\n                                  A\n\n                           COLOURED WOMAN.\n\n       *       *       *       *       *\n\n  \"There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there\n  is neither male nor female, for ye are all one in Christ Jesus.\"\n\n                                                          GAL. iii. 25.\n\n       *       *       *       *       *\n\n\n                            PHILADELPHIA:\n\n                 COLLINS, PRINTER, 705 JAYNE STREET.\n\n                                1863.\n\n\n\n\nMEMOIR, &C.\n\n    In the following Narrative of \"Old Elizabeth,\" which\n    was taken mainly from her own lips in her 97th year, her\n    simple language has been adhered to as strictly as was\n    consistent with perspicuity and propriety.\n\n\nI was born in Maryland in the year 1766. My parents were slaves. Both\nmy father and mother were religious people, and belonged to the\nMethodist Society. It was my father's practice to read in the Bible\naloud to his children every sabbath morning. At these seasons, when I\nwas but five years old, I often felt the overshadowing of the Lord's\nSpirit, without at all understanding what it meant; and these incomes\nand influences continued to attend me until I was eleven years old,\nparticularly when I was alone, by which I was preserved from doing\nanything that I thought was wrong.\n\nIn the eleventh year of my age, my master sent me to another farm,\nseveral miles from my parents, brothers, and sisters, which was a\ngreat trouble to me. At last I grew so lonely and sad I thought I\nshould die, if I did not see my mother. I asked the overseer if I\nmight go, but being positively denied, I concluded to go without his\nknowledge. When I reached home my mother was away. I set off and\nwalked twenty miles before I found her. I staid with her for several\ndays, and we returned together. Next day I was sent back to my new\nplace, which renewed my sorrow. At parting, my mother told me that I\nhad \"nobody in the wide world to look to but God.\" These words fell\nupon my heart with ponderous weight, and seemed to add to my grief. I\nwent back repeating as I went, \"none but God in the wide world.\" On\nreaching the farm, I found the overseer was displeased at me for going\nwithout his liberty. He tied me with a rope, and gave me some stripes\nof which I carried the marks for weeks.\n\nAfter this time, finding as my mother said, I had none in the world to\nlook to but God, I betook myself to prayer, and in every lonely place\nI found an altar. I mourned sore like a dove and chattered forth my\nsorrow, moaning in the corners of the field, and under the fences.\n\nI continued in this state for about six months, feeling as though my\nhead were waters, and I could do nothing but weep. I lost my appetite,\nand not being able to take enough food to sustain nature, I became so\nweak I had but little strength to work; still I was required to do all\nmy duty. One evening, after the duties of the day were ended, I\nthought I could not live over the night, so threw myself on a bench,\nexpecting to die, and without being prepared to meet my Maker; and my\nspirit cried within me, must I die in this state, and be banished from\nThy presence forever? I own I am a sinner in Thy sight, and not fit to\nlive where thou art. Still it was my fervent desire that the Lord\nwould pardon me. Just at this season, I saw with my spiritual eye, an\nawful gulf of misery. As I thought I was about to plunge into it, I\nheard a voice saying, \"rise up and pray,\" which strengthened me. I\nfell on my knees and prayed the best I could the Lord's prayer.\nKnowing no more to say, I halted, but continued on my knees. My spirit\nwas then _taught_ to pray, \"Lord, have mercy on me--Christ save me.\"\nImmediately there appeared a director, clothed in white raiment. I\nthought he took me by the hand and said, \"come with me.\" He led me\ndown a long journey to a fiery gulf, and left me standing upon the\nbrink of this awful pit. I began to scream for mercy, thinking I was\nabout to be plunged to the belly of hell, and believed I should sink\nto endless ruin. Although I prayed and wrestled with all my might, it\nseemed in vain. Still, I felt all the while that I was sustained by\nsome invisible power. At this solemn moment, I thought I saw a hand\nfrom which hung, as it were, a silver hair, and a voice told me that\nall the hope I had of being saved was no more than a hair; still,\npray, and it will be sufficient. I then renewed my struggle, crying\nfor mercy and salvation, until I found that every cry raised me higher\nand higher, and my head was quite above the fiery pillars. Then I\nthought I was permitted to look straight forward, and saw the Saviour\nstanding with His hand stretched out to receive me. An indescribably\nglorious light was _in_ Him, and He said, \"peace, peace, come unto\nme.\" At this moment I felt that my sins were forgiven me, and the time\nof my deliverance was at hand. I sprang forward and fell at his feet,\ngiving Him all the thanks and highest praises, crying, Thou hast\nredeemed me--Thou hast redeemed me to thyself. I felt filled with\nlight and love. At this moment I thought my former guide took me again\nby the hand and led me upward, till I came to the celestial world and\nto heaven's door, which I saw was open, and while I stood there, a\npower surrounded me which drew me in, and I saw millions of glorified\nspirits in white robes. After I had this view, I thought I heard a\nvoice saying, \"Art thou willing to be saved?\" I said, Yes Lord. Again\nI was asked, \"Art thou willing to be saved in my way?\" I stood\nspeechless until he asked me again, \"Art thou willing to be saved in\nmy way?\" Then I heard a whispering voice say, \"If thou art not saved\nin the Lord's way, thou canst not be saved at all;\" at which I\nexclaimed, \"Yes Lord, in thy own way.\" Immediately a light fell upon\nmy head, and I was filled with light, and I was shown the world lying\nin wickedness, and was told I must go there, and call the people to\nrepentance, for the day of the Lord was at hand; and this message was\nas a heavy yoke upon me, so that I wept bitterly at the thought of\nwhat I should have to pass through. While I wept, I heard a voice say,\n\"weep not, some will laugh at thee, some will scoff at thee, and the\ndogs will bark at thee, but while thou doest my will, I will be with\nthee to the ends of the earth.\"\n\nI was at this time not yet thirteen years old. The next day, when I\nhad come to myself, I felt like a new creature in Christ, and all my\ndesire was to see the Saviour.\n\nI lived in a place where there was no preaching, and no religious\ninstruction; but every day I went out amongst the hay-stacks, where\nthe presence of the Lord overshadowed me, and I was filled with\nsweetness and joy, and was as a vessel filled with holy oil. In this\nway I continued for about a year; many times while my hands were at my\nwork, my spirit was carried away to spiritual things. One day as I was\ngoing to my old place behind the hay-stacks to pray, I was assailed\nwith this language, \"Are you going there to weep and pray? what a\nfool! there are older professors than you are, and they do not take\nthat way to get to heaven; people whose sins are forgiven ought to be\njoyful and lively, and not be struggling and praying.\" With this I\nhalted and concluded I would not go, but do as other professors did,\nand so went off to play; but at this moment the light that was in me\nbecame darkened, and the peace and joy that I once had, departed from\nme.\n\nAbout this time I was moved back to the farm where my mother lived,\nand then sold to a stranger. Here I had deep sorrows and plungings,\nnot having experienced a return of that sweet evidence and light with\nwhich I had been favoured formerly; but by watching unto prayer, and\nwrestling mightily with the Lord, my peace gradually returned, and\nwith it a great exercise and weight upon my heart for the salvation of\nmy fellow-creatures; and I was often carried to distant lands and\nshown places where I should have to travel and deliver the Lord's\nmessage. Years afterwards, I found myself visiting those towns and\ncountries that I had seen in the light as I sat at home at my\nsewing,--places of which I had never heard.\n\nSome years from this time I was sold to a Presbyterian for a term of\nyears, as he did not think it right to hold slaves for life. Having\nserved him faithfully my time out, he gave me my liberty, which was\nabout the thirtieth year of my age.\n\nAs I now lived in a neighborhood where I could attend religious\nmeetings, occasionally I felt moved to speak a few words therein; but\nI shrank from it--so great was the cross to my nature.\n\nI did not speak much till I had reached my forty-second year, when it\nwas revealed to me that the message which had been given to me I had\nnot yet delivered, and the time had come. As I could read but little,\nI questioned within myself how it would be possible for me to deliver\nthe message, when I did not understand the Scriptures. Whereupon I was\nmoved to open a Bible that was near me, which I did, and my eyes fell\nupon this passage, \"Gird up thy loins now like a man, and answer thou\nme. Obey God rather than man,\" &c. Here I fell into a great exercise\nof spirit, and was plunged very low. I went from one religious\nprofessor to another, enquiring of them what ailed me; but of all\nthese I could find none who could throw any light upon such\nimpressions. They all told me there was nothing in Scripture that\nwould sanction such exercises. It was hard for men to travel, and what\nwould women do? These things greatly discouraged me, and shut up my\nway, and caused me to resist the Spirit. After going to all that were\naccounted pious, and receiving no help, I returned to the Lord,\nfeeling that I was nothing, and knew nothing, and wrestled and prayed\nto the Lord that He would fully reveal His will, and make the way\nplain.\n\nWhilst I thus struggled, there seemed a light from heaven to fall upon\nme, which banished all my desponding fears, and I was enabled to form\na new resolution to go on to prison and to death, if it might be my\nportion: and the Lord showed me that it was His will I should be\nresigned to die any death that might be my lot, in carrying his\nmessage, and be entirely crucified to the world, and sacrifice _all_\nto His glory that was then in my possession, which His witnesses, the\nholy Apostles, had done before me. It was then revealed to me that the\nLord had given me the evidence of a clean heart, in which I could\nrejoice day and night, and I walked and talked with God, and my soul\nwas illuminated with heavenly light, and I knew nothing but Jesus\nChrist, and him crucified.\n\nOne day, after these things, while I was at my work, the Spirit\ndirected me to go to a poor widow, and ask her if I might have a\nmeeting at her house, which was situated in one of the lowest and\nworst streets in Baltimore. With great joy she gave notice, and at the\ntime appointed I appeared there among a few coloured sisters. When\nthey had all prayed, they called upon me to close the meeting, and I\nfelt an impression that I must say a few words; and while I was\nspeaking, the house seemed filled with light; and when I was about to\nclose the meeting, and was kneeling, a man came in and stood till I\narose. It proved to be a watchman. The sisters became so frightened,\nthey all went away except the one who lived in the house, and an old\nwoman; they both appeared to be much frightened, fearing they should\nreceive some personal injury, or be put out of the house. A feeling of\nweakness came over me for a short time, but I soon grew warm and\ncourageous in the Spirit. The man then said to me, \"I was sent here to\nbreak up your meeting. Complaint has been made to me that the people\nround here cannot sleep for the racket.\" I replied, \"a good racket is\nbetter than a bad racket. How do they rest when the ungodly are\ndancing and fiddling till midnight? Why are not they molested by the\nwatchmen? and why should we be for praising God, our Maker? Are we\nworthy of greater punishment for praying to Him? and are we to be\nprohibited from doing so, that sinners may remain slumbering in their\nsins?\" While speaking these few words I grew warm with _heavenly_\nzeal, and laid my hand upon him and addressed him with gospel truth,\n\"how do sinners sleep in hell, after slumbering in their sins here,\nand crying, 'let me rest, let me rest,' while sporting on the very\nbrink of hell? Is the cause of God to be destroyed for this purpose?\"\nSpeaking several words more to this amount, he turned pale and\ntrembled, and begged my pardon, acknowledging that it was not his wish\nto interrupt us, and that he would never disturb a religious assembly\nagain. He then took leave of me in a comely manner and wished us\nsuccess. After he was gone, I turned to the old sisters who by this\ntime were quite cheered up. You see, said I, if the sisters had not\nfled, what a victory we might have had on the Lord's side; for the man\nseemed ready to give up under conviction. If it had not been for their\ncowardice, we might have all bowed in prayer, and a shout of victory\nhad been heard amongst us.\n\nOur meeting gave great offence, and we were forbid holding any more\nassemblies. Even the elders of our meeting joined with the wicked\npeople, and said such meetings must be stopped, and that woman\nquieted. But I was not afraid of any of them, and continued to go, and\nburnt with a zeal not my own. The old sisters were zealous sometimes,\nand at other times would sink under the cross. Thus they grew cold, at\nwhich I was much grieved. I proposed to them to ask the elders to send\na brother, which was concluded upon.\n\nWe went on for several years, and the Lord was with us with great\npower it proved, to the conversion of many souls, and we continued to\ngrow stronger.\n\nI felt at times that I must exercise in the ministry, but when I rose\nupon my feet I felt ashamed, and so I went under a cloud for some\ntime, and endeavoured to keep silence; but I could not quench the\nSpirit. I was rejected by the elders and rulers, as Christ was\nrejected by the Jews before me, and while others were excused in\ncrimes of the darkest dye, I was hunted down in every place where I\nappointed a meeting. Wading through many sorrows, I thought at times I\nmight as well be banished from this life, as to feel the Almighty\ndrawing me one way, and man another; so that I was tempted to cast\nmyself into the dock. But contemplating the length of eternity, and\nhow long my sufferings would be in that unchangeable world, compared\nwith this, if I endured a little longer, the Lord was pleased to\ndeliver me from this gloomy, melancholy state in his own time; though\nwhile this temptation lasted I roved up and down, and talked and\nprayed.\n\nI often felt that I was unfit to assemble with the congregation with\nwhom I had gathered, and had sometimes been made to rejoice in the\nLord. I felt that I was despised on account of this gracious calling,\nand was looked upon as a speckled bird by the ministers to whom I\nlooked for instruction, and to whom I resorted every opportunity for\nthe same; but when I would converse with them, some would cry out,\n\"You are an enthusiast;\" and others said, \"the Discipline did not\nallow of any such division of the work;\" until I began to think I\nsurely must be wrong. Under this reflection, I had another gloomy\ncloud to struggle through; but after awhile I felt much moved upon by\nthe Spirit of the Lord, and meeting with an aged sister, I found upon\nconversing with her that she could sympathize with me in this\nspiritual work. She was the first one I had met with, who could fully\nunderstand my exercises. She offered to open her house for a meeting,\nand run the risk of all the church would do to her for it. Many were\nafraid to open their houses in this way, lest they should be turned\nout of the church.\n\nI persevered, notwithstanding the opposition of those who were looked\nupon as higher and wiser. The meeting was appointed, and but few came.\nI felt much backwardness, and as though I could not pray, but a\npressure upon me to arise and express myself by way of exhortation.\nAfter hesitating for some time whether I would take up the cross or\nno, I arose, and after expressing a few words, the Spirit came upon me\nwith life, and a victory was gained over the power of darkness, and we\ncould rejoice together in His love.\n\nAs for myself, I was so full I hardly knew whether I was in the body,\nor out of the body--so great was my joy for the victory on the Lord's\nside. But the persecution against me increased, and a complaint was\ncarried forward, as was done formerly against Daniel, the servant of\nGod, and the elders came out with indignation for my holding meetings\ncontrary to discipline--being a woman.\n\nThus we see when the heart is not inspired, and the inward eye\nenlightened by the Spirit, we are incapable of discerning the mystery\nof God in these things. Individuals creep into the church that are\nunregenerate, and after they have been there awhile, they fancy that\nthey have got the grace of God, while they are destitute of it. They\nmay have a degree of light in their heads, but evil in their hearts;\nwhich makes them think they are qualified to be judges of the\nministry, and their conceit makes them very busy in matters of\nreligion, judging of the revelations that are given to others, while\nthey have received none themselves. Being thus mistaken, they are\ncalculated to make a great deal of confusion in the church, and clog\nthe true ministry.\n\nThese are they who eat their own bread, and wear their own apparel,\nhaving the form of godliness, but are destitute of the power.\n\nAgain I felt encouraged to attend another and another appointment. At\none of these meetings, some of the class-leaders were present, who\nwere constrained to cry out, \"Surely the Lord has _revealed_ these\nthings to her\" and asked one another if they ever heard the like? I\nlook upon man as a very selfish being, when placed in a religious\noffice, to presume to resist the work of the Almighty; because He\ndoes not work by man's authority. I did not faint under\ndiscouragement, but pressed on.\n\nUnder the contemplation of these things, I slept but little, being\nmuch engaged in receiving the revelations of the Divine will\nconcerning this work, and the mysterious call thereto.\n\nI felt very unworthy and small, notwithstanding the Lord had shown\nhimself with great power, insomuch that conjecturers and critics were\nconstrained to join in praise to his great name; for truly, we had\ntimes of refreshing from the presence of the Lord. At one of the\nmeetings, a vast number of the white inhabitants of the place, and\nmany coloured people, attended--many no doubt from curiosity to hear\nwhat the old coloured woman had to say. One, a great scripturian,\nfixed himself behind the door with pen and ink, in order to take down\nthe discourse in short-hand; but the Almighty Being anointed me with\nsuch a portion of his Spirit, that he cast away his paper and pen, and\nheard the discourse with patience, and was much affected, for the Lord\nwrought powerfully on his heart. After meeting, he came forward and\noffered me his hand with solemnity on his countenance, and handed me\nsomething to pay for my conveyance home.\n\nI returned, much strengthened by the Lord's power, to go on to the\nfulfilment of His work, although I was again pressed by the\nauthorities of the church to which I belonged, for imprudency; and so\nmuch condemned, that I was sorely tempted by the enemy to turn aside\ninto the wilderness. I was so embarrassed and encompassed, I wondered\nwithin myself whether all that were called to be mouth piece for the\nLord, suffered such deep wadings as I experienced.\n\nI now found I had to travel still more extensively in the work of the\nministry, and I applied to the Lord for direction. I was often\n_invited_ to go hither and thither, but felt that I must wait for the\ndictates of His Spirit.\n\nAt a meeting which I held in Maryland, I was led to speak from the\npassage, \"Woe to the rebellious city,\" &c. After the meeting, the\npeople came where I was, to take me before the squire; but the Lord\ndelivered me from their hands.\n\nI also held meetings in Virginia. The people there would not believe\nthat a coloured woman could preach. And moreover, as she had no\nlearning, they strove to imprison me because I spoke against slavery:\nand being brought up, they asked by what authority I spake? and if I\nhad been ordained? I answered, not by the commission of men's hands:\nif the Lord had ordained me, I needed nothing better.\n\nAs I travelled along through the land, I was led at different times to\nconverse with white men who were by profession ministers of the\ngospel. Many of them, up and down, confessed they did not believe in\nrevelation, which gave me to see that men were sent forth as ministers\nwithout Christ's authority. In a conversation with one of these, he\nsaid, \"You think you have these things by revelation, but there has\nbeen no such thing as revelation since Christ's ascension.\" I asked\nhim where the apostle John got his revelation while he was in the Isle\nof Patmos. With this, he rose up and left me, and I said in my spirit,\nget thee behind me Satan.\n\nI visited many remote places, where there were no meeting houses, and\nheld many glorious meetings, for the Lord poured out his Spirit in\nsweet effusions. I also travelled in Canada, and visited several\nsettlements of coloured people, and felt an open door amongst them.\n\nI may here remark, that while journeying through the different states\nof the Union, I met with many of the Quaker Friends, and visited them\nin their families. I received much kindness and sympathy, and no\nopposition from them, in the prosecution of my labours.\n\nOn one occasion, in a thinly settled part of the country, seeing a\nFriend's meeting house open, I went in; at the same time a Friend and\nhis little daughter followed me. We three composed the meeting. As we\nsat there in silence, I felt a remarkable overshadowing of the Divine\npresence, as much so as I ever experienced any where. Toward the\nclose, a few words seemed to be given me, which I expressed, and left\nthe place greatly refreshed in Spirit. From thence I went to Michigan,\nwhere I found a wide field of labour amongst my own colour. Here I\nremained four years. I established a school for coloured orphans,\nhaving always felt the great importance of the religious and moral\n_agri_culture of children, and the great need of it, especially\namongst the coloured people. Having white teachers, I met with much\nencouragement.\n\nMy eighty-seventh year had now arrived, when suffering from disease,\nand feeling released from travelling further in my good Master's\ncause, I came on to Philadelphia, where I have remained until this\ntime, which brings me to my ninety-seventh year. When I went forth, it\nwas without purse or scrip,--and I have come through great tribulation\nand temptation--not by any might of my own, for I feel that I am but\nas dust and ashes before my almighty Helper, who has, according to His\npromise, been with me and sustained me through all, and gives me now\nfirm faith that he will be with me to the end, and, in his own good\ntime, receive me into His everlasting rest.","title":"Memoir of Old Elizabeth, A Coloured Woman","tradition":"scripture-revelation","translated_text":null,"word_count":4334}