{"collection":"myth-cosmogony","full_text_available":true,"graph_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/api/page/gutenberg_26379/graph","html_url":"https://unchartedknowledge.5gfusion.net/v2/page/gutenberg_26379","id":"gutenberg_26379","license":"Public Domain (US)","rights_basis":"gutenberg_metadata_copyright_false","source":"gutenberg","source_url":"https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/26379","summary":null,"tags":["Category: Children & Young Adult Reading","Category: Mythology, Legends & Folklore","Children -- Conduct of life -- Juvenile fiction","Vice -- Juvenile fiction"],"text":"Produced by Mark C. Orton and the Online Distributed\nProofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This file was\nproduced from images generously made available by The\nInternet Archive/American Libraries.)\n\n\n\n\n\n\n[Illustration: FRONTISPIECE.]\n\n\n\nVICE\nIN ITS\nPROPER SHAPE;\nOR, THE\nWonderful and Melancholy\nTRANSFORMATION\nOF SEVERAL\nNAUGHTY MASTERS AND MISSES\nINTO THOSE\nContemptible ANIMALS which they most\nresemble in Disposition.\n\n\nPrinted for the Benefit of all GOOD BOYS\nand GIRLS.\n\n\n\nTHE FIRST _WORCESTER_ EDITION.\n\nPRINTED at WORCESTER, _Massachusetts_,\nBY ISAIAH THOMAS,\nSold at his BOOKSTORE, and by THOMAS\nand ANDREWS in BOSTON.\n\nMDCCLXXXIX.\n\n\n\n\nINTRODUCTION.\n\n\nIt was the opinion of the wise _Pythagoras_, and of some other\nphilosophers, that the souls of men, women, and children, after their\ndeath, are sent into other human bodies, and sometimes into those of\nbeasts and birds, or even insects; and that they hereby change their\nresidence either to their advantage or disadvantage, according to their\ngood or ill behaviour in their preceding state of existence. This\nsingular opinion still prevails in some part of the Eastindies; and\nthat to such a degree that they make it criminal to put any animal to\ndeath: \"For how do you know, say they, but in killing a sheep, a bird,\nor a fish, you murder your father, or your brother, or some other\ndeceased friend or relation, whose soul may inhabit the body of the\nanimal you so wantonly destroy?\" An officer in the service of the\nEastindia Company, and a particular friend of mine, had like to have\nlost his life by not paying a proper deference to this whimsical\nnotion; for being some time in that part of the country, and happening\nto shoot a heron, he was immediately arrested and prosecuted for it by\none of the natives. The man insisted that the heron was inhabited by\nthe soul of his father; and supported his point so much to the\nsatisfaction of the court, that had it not been for the friendly\nassistance of a Jew, who appeared as the captain's advocate, he would\ncertainly have been condemned. The Jew, allowed that what the plaintiff\nhad asserted was strictly true, but pleaded in behalf of his client,\nthat the soul of his, the said client's grandmother, resided in the\nbody of a fish, which the said client had often seen and knew perfectly\nwell; and that at the time when the heron was killed, the said heron\nwas going to dart upon the said fish to devour it; so that the said\nclient being strongly moved thereunto by his natural affection,\ninstantly shot the said heron purely to save the life of his\ngrandmother. This plea was admitted, and the captain was immediately\ndischarged by order of the court. It is well for the reader that the\ncaptain escaped as he did: for if he had been hanged for murdering the\nheron, it is more than probable that it would have been out of his\npower to have returned to England with that curious little treatise\nwhich I have now taken the pains to translate into English for the\namusement of the little masters and misses of Great Britain.\n\nIt contains a diverting account of several naughty boys and girls, who,\nafter their death (which was generally owing to their own folly) were\ndegraded into such animals as they most resembled when alive. I cannot\npretend to say who was the author; for his modesty was so great, that\nhe has not inserted his name in the title page.\n\nThe captain tells me, it is the opinion of some of the Indian criticks,\nthat he was an academy-keeper, who wrote for the instruction of his\nscholars; and of others, that he was a fond father who wrote for the\nentertainment of his children; but as it is very possible that both of\nthem may be mistaken, I shall not presume to decide which of them have\nbeen so fortunate as to discover the truth in a matter of such evident\nimportance.\n\nI have only to observe, that as long proper names (such as those of the\nIndians) would have been too crabbed for most of my little readers, I\nhave put myself to the amazing trouble of substituting English names in\ntheir room, which are expressive of the characters of the persons to\nwhom they are applied. After humbly begging the author's pardon, for\ntaking this liberty with his ingenious performance, I must desire all\nthe masters and misses who read my translation of it, to be extremely\ncareful to avoid all the crimes and follies which it was intended to\ncorrect; otherwise, if my friend the captain (who will probably hear of\ntheir ill behaviour) should happen to speak of it, when he makes\nanother voyage to India, and it should by any means reach the ear of my\nauthor, we may perhaps have a second volume, containing a mortifying\naccount of the surprising and lamentable transmigrations of some of the\nnaughty boys and girls in England.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. I.\n\n_Of the wonderful Transmigration of_ Jack Idle _into the body of an\nass_.\n\n\nOne morning after breakfast I took a walk into the fields with my seven\ndear children; which I did, not only for the benefit of their health,\nbut as a reward for their good behaviour. They always obey me and their\naffectionate mother with the utmost cheerfulness; and I, in return, am\nalways ready to indulge them as far as my duty and their interest will\npermit. When we had travelled about three miles from the city, where\nDivine Providence has fixed our abode, we came to a range of little\ntenements, or I should rather have called them sheds, over the midst of\nwhich (and it was likewise the largest) was fixed a board, on which was\nwritten in lofty capitals WAL*KINBEHOL*DANDLE*ARN,[1] which signifies,\n_Walk in_, _behold_, _and learn_. While I was musing upon this strange\ninscription, and wondering what curiosities there could be in such\ncontemptible little huts, the door of the middlemost was suddenly\nopened by a Bramin, who with the greatest politeness and affability,\ndesired us to walk in, assuring me, that notwithstanding the mean\nappearance of his little tenements, there were several things to be\nseen in them, which might contribute to the entertainment and\ninstruction of my pretty fellow travellers. \"I am, said he, as you may\nperceive by my habit, a Bramin, and my name is _Wiseman_. All the time\nI can spare from the worship of my Maker, and the contemplation of that\nastonishing wisdom and beneficence which he has displayed in his works\nof creation and providence, I cheerfully devote to the service of my\nfellow mortals, and particularly of the younger and unexperienced part\nof them. The most valuable service I can render them is to conduct them\ninto the paths of virtue and discretion. For this purpose, having been\ngifted with the faculty of distinguishing those animals which are now\nanimated by the souls of such human beings as formerly degraded\nthemselves to a level with the unthinking brutes, I have taken the\npains to provide a collection of beasts, birds, &c. most of which are\ninhabited by the souls of some naughty masters or misses, who died in\nthe neighbourhood, and it is possible were not unknown to your little\ncompanions. It was a proverb among the ancient Bramins, that _Example\nis more powerful than precept_, and it is the common language of\nmankind to this day, _I understand what I hear, but I believe what I\nsee_. It would not be amiss therefore, if you were to accompany the\nyoung gentlemen and ladies into my little appartments, that they may be\neye witnesses to the mortifying consequences of an ill spent and\nvicious life, even to those who have not arrived at the age of\nmanhood.\"\n\n      [1] The captain informs that this inscription is in the language\n      of the ancient _Bramins_.\n\nWe accepted the offer with the utmost gratitude, and eagerly inquired\nwhat we had to pay for admittance. But the good Bramin assured us, that\nhe never made a traffick of the little wisdom he had to communicate,\nand that the most acceptable recompense we could make him, was, to\nbestow what we could prudently spare upon such real objects of charity\nas might afterwards fall in our way:--\"For mercy and benevolence, said\nhe, are the darling attributes of heaven, and those who are most\ndistinguished for the practice of them, bear the nearest resemblance to\ntheir Maker, and will therefore receive the largest portion of his\nfavour both in this world, and in that which is to come.\"\n\nThe first room we were conducted into was the habitation of a little\nass, who, as soon as we entered the place, began to bray, and kick up\nhis heels, at a most violent rate; but, upon the appearance of Mr.\nWiseman (which I have before observed was the Bramin's name) he thought\nproper to compose himself, and stood as quiet as a lamb.--\"This\nstubborn little beast said our kind conductor, is now animated by the\nsoul of the late master _Idle_. In his life-time he possessed all the\nbad properties of the animal you see before you; so that, to speak the\ntruth, he now appears in his proper shape. His rough coat of hair is a\nvery suitable emblem of the ruggedness of his disposition; and his long\nand clumsy ears not only denotes his stupidity, but, as they afford a\nvery secure and convenient hold to any one who has occasion to catch\nhim when he runs loose in the fields, they sufficiently intimate that\nhe was always open to the ill advice of his play-fellows. If the\nmeanest and most dirty boy in the neighbourhood was in want of a\ncompanion, or rather a tool, to assist him in his mischievous pranks,\nhe had nothing to do but to make his application to _Jack Idle_; for\nfoolish Jack (as they truly called him) was at the beck of every\nmischievous rogue; and when the mischief was done, he was always left,\nlike a stupid ass as he was, to bear the burden of it. His father had\nmoney; and Jack's great pride was to be complimented by his raggamuffin\ncompanions as the cook of the game. Once (I remember it perfectly well)\nthree bargemen's boys having a violent inclination to plunder a pippin\ntree, which was the property of farmer _Crusty_, they gave master Jacky\nsuch a tempting account of the wish'd for prize, and held forth so\nliberally in praise of his courage and ingenuity, that they prevailed\nupon him to be not only a party, but the commander in chief in this\nhopeful enterprize. But, as such adventures generally terminate in the\nmost mortifying disappointment, the young plunderers were discovered by\nthe farmer before they had gathered half their booty. The three\ntarpaulins being at the bottom of the tree made their escape without\nmuch difficulty; but Jack, who, to support the dignity of his new\ncommand, had ascended almost to the top, was unfortunately taken\nprisoner. The consequence was, that his father (who had to deal with a\nwretch who was as crusty by nature as he was by name) after being\nobliged to pay ten times the value of the fruit, conducted his son to\nMr. _Sharp_, the gentleman who had the trouble of his education, from\nwhom he received a severe flogging in the presence of all his school\nfellows, as a very suitable reward of his stupid ambition. From this\naccount of him you will naturally conclude that he was no great friend\nto learning; and, indeed, so remarkable was his aversion to the useful\narts of reading and writing, that his greatest improvement amounted\nonly to an indifferent knowledge of the alphabet, and the poor\naccomplishment of being just able to scrawl his own name in characters\nwhich were scarcely legible. He was equally distinguished for his speed\nand fidelity when his parents sent him on an errand; for he could\nhardly make shift to saunter a mile in an hour, and when he arrived at\nthe place of his destination, he usually forgot three fourths of his\nmessage, and endeavoured to supply the defect by some blundering tale\nof his own invention. He was once dispatched by his father, in great\nhaste, to a gentleman who lived not a quarter of a mile off, to request\nthe favour of his company, in half an hour's time, to settle matters\nwith a grazer, of whom they had purchased several head of cattle; when\nJack arrived at the gentleman's house, which he actually did in the\nshort space of an hour and a half, he rubbed his eyes, and scratched\nhis head, and informed him that his father wanted him sadly, and that\nhe must come directly to speak with the _brazier_, who, he said, had\nwaited for him above two hours. It was very happy for his parents\n(whether they thought so or not) that Jack's sudden exit out of the\nworld, in the thirteenth year of his age, effectually prevented him\nfrom bringing any material disgrace upon his family; which he certainly\nwould have done, if he had lived to be his own master. The occasion of\nhis death was as follows:--One morning, instead of making the best of\nhis way to school, (which he was constantly ordered to do) happening\nvery luckily to be overtaken by _Tom Sharper_, and _Dick Lackwit_, they\nprudently agreed to avoid the intolerable drudgery of the hornbook, by\nplaying truant and indulging themselves in the profitable diversions of\nsitting all day on the bank of a lonesome brook to fish for minows;\nthey had pretty good sport, as they called it, for the first hour; but\nthen Mr. _Sharper's_ line happening to be entangled among some large\nweeds, from which he could not disengage it as he stood upon the brink;\nand as he was naturally too great an adept in the science of self\npreservation, to expose himself to danger, when he could persuade\nanother to supply his place; he requested the favour of master _Idle_\nto ascend a sloping tree which stood upon the bank, and from thence to\ndescend gradually upon a hanging branch, the small end of which almost\ntouched his line. Poor Jack was somewhat unwilling to venture upon the\nexperiment; but a little more persuasion, which was supported by a few\nsurly menaces, soon vanquished every objection. He accordingly ascended\nthe tree; but when he attempted to seat himself upon the hanging branch\nthe small twigs, upon which he stupidly fastened his hold for that\npurpose, suddenly gave way, and down he plunged into the middle of the\nbrook, where, after many eager and ineffectual struggles to recover the\nbank, he sunk to the bottom, and rose no more. The last words he spoke\nwere, _Oh! my dear father! my dear mother! I wish I had_--He meant I\nsuppose, that he wished he had followed their good advice; but the\nwater, which ran very fast into his mouth, suddenly stopped his speech,\nand nothing more was heard but a faint bubbling in his throat, and two\nor three desperate plunges at the bottom of the water, to preserve that\nlife which fell a melancholy sacrifice to his own folly and\ndisobedience!--One would think that such a shocking catastrophe would\nbe sufficient to subdue ten times the stubbornness and stupidity for\nwhich master _Idle_ was so remarkable: But as we are too apt to forget\nthe eager promises, and laugh at the self condemning reflections, which\nwe have made in the hour of distress, I need not mention it as a\nprodigy, that the soul by which this little beast is animated, is still\ninfected with the same vicious disposition, which disgraced and\npunished it, when it occupied the body of _Jack Idle_.\"\n\nTo convince us of the truth of what he said, the good Bramin addressed\nhimself to the ass before us, and assured him that if he was sincerely\ninclined to behave as he ought to do, and forsake the follies he had\nbeen guilty of in his former state of existence, he should again have\nthe honour to ascend to the rank of human beings. But the stubborn\nlittle animal (who perfectly understood what he said) first leered at\nhim with the most stupid resentment in the world, and then fell a\nbraying and kicking with greater violence than when we first entered\nthe room. \"Soho! said Mr. Wiseman, is that your manners, my boy;\"--and\nthen giving him two or three hearty strokes, \"well, well, said he, if\nthis is all the return I am to have for my generous care of you, I will\ncertainly sell you to the first sandman I see, who will bestow upon you\nplenty of drubbing, plenty of fasting, and (what you will relish the\nworst of all) a never failing plenty of work.\"\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. II.\n\n_An Account of the surprizing Transmigration of Master_ ANTHONY\nGREEDYGUTS, _into the Body of a Pig_.\n\n\nThe next room into which we were conducted, contained a fat little pig,\nwho, as soon as we had entered the door, began to cry _a week_, _a\nweek_, _a week_, in such a squeaking tone as grated our ears in the\nmost disagreeable manner: but as soon as Mr. _Wiseman_ produced his\nwand, he lowered his pipes to a few sulky grunts, and then became as\nstill as a mouse.--\"This young pig, said the venerable Bramin, is now\nanimated by the soul of the late master _Greedyguts_, who died about\ntwo months ago, and has left a number of relations behind him in almost\nevery town you can mention. Poor foolish youth, if he had been less\nfond of his belly, and more attentive to his book, and to the good\nadvice of his parents, his soul would not have been confined as it now\nis, in the body of that nasty, greedy, and noisy little animal which\nyou see before you. But, to represent his character in its proper\ncolours, he was always a hoggish little fellow, and disdained every\nother sort of labour but that of lifting his hand to his mouth. He\nloved eating much better than reading; and would prefer a tart, a\ncustard, a plumcake, or even a slice of gingerbread, or an apple, to\nthe prettiest, and most useful little book you could present him with;\nso that if his parents had purchased a hundred books for him, one after\nthe other, he would have readily parted with them to the first crafty\nboy he met with, who had any trash to spare by way of exchange. It\ncannot therefore be considered as a miracle, notwithstanding the\nextraordinary care and expense which his friends bestowed upon his\neducation, that he always continued a blockhead, and was such a perfect\ndunce at eleven years of age, that instead of being able to read and\nwrite as a young gentleman ought to do, he could scarcely tell his\nletters. He was equally remarkable for his selfishness; for if he had\ntwenty cheesecakes in his box, or his pockets full of oranges and\napples, he would sooner have given a tooth out of his head than have\nparted with one of them, even to his own brother or sister. The\nconsequence was (and indeed what else could have been expected) that he\nwas despised and hated by all his play fellows, and distinguished by\nthe mortifying title of _Tony Pig_; an animal which he perfectly\nresembled in his nastiness as well as greediness. For if he was dressed\nin the morning as clean as hands could make him, he would, by running\ninto puddles and kennels, and rolling upon the ground, become as black\nas a chimney sweeper before noon; and I sincerely believe that he\nthought it as great a punishment to have his hair combed, or to wash\nhis hands and face, as to be whipped; for he would cry and struggle as\nmuch to avoid the one as to escape the other. But, to ease his parents\nof their heavy apprehensions upon his account, and to rid the world of\nsuch a plague and disgrace, as he certainly would have been, if he had\nlived to years of maturity, kind death was pleased to dispatch him in\nthe twelfth year of his age, by the help of a dozen penny custards,\nwhich he greedily conveyed down his throat at one meal, and thereby\ngorged his stomach, and threw himself into a mortal fever. After his\nexit, his soul, as I have already informed you, was hurried into the\nbody of this little pig; a station which perfectly corresponds with his\ndisposition. Nay, so great is his stubbornness (which is another\nhateful quality in which he resembled the animal before you) that his\npunishment has not made the least alteration in his temper; for, if we\nwere to get his soul replaced into a human body, upon his promise of\nimmediate amendment, he will not submit even to make such a promise. To\nconvince you that I have not misrepresented his character, I'll try the\nexperiment immediately.\" Accordingly, the good Bramin asked him before\nus all, if, upon the condition above-mentioned, he would leave off his\ngreedy and selfish behaviour. To this he condescended, though with a\nvisible reluctance, to grunt, _aye, aye_. \"But how long will it be,\nsaid Mr. Wiseman, before you perform your promise?\" _A week, a week, a\nweek_, cried the pig. \"And how long will it be before you lay aside\nyour nastiness, and maintain such a cleanly and decent appearance as\nbecomes a gentleman?\" _A week, a week_, said the dirty creature. \"And\nhow long will it be before you respect the good advice of your parents,\nand prefer the improvement of your understanding to the gratification\nof your appetite?\" _A week, a week, a week_, replied the stubborn\nlittle animal. \"In short, said the worthy Bramin, if I were to repeat\nthe same questions to him a month, or even a year hence, I should not\nprevail upon him to say _now_; but his constant answer would be, _a\nweek, a week, a week_. I believe, therefore, that instead of reforming\nhim (which is an event that would afford me the most sensible pleasure)\nwe shall at last be forced to roast and eat him; for, as long as he\ncontinues in his present way of thinking, it is very certain that his\nexistence can be of no service either to himself, or any one else.\"\nThus, then, said he, I have troubled you with a particular account of\nthis stupid little pig; and I sincerely hope that the story will\nprevail upon my young visitors to be cleanly in their appearance,\ntemperate in their diet, and kind and obliging to every body; for\nwhosoever pursues a contrary behaviour, is in reality a _hog_, though\nhe bears the name of a gentleman.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. III.\n\n_The Transmigration of Miss_ DOROTHY CHATTERFAST _into the Body of a\nMagpie._\n\n\nIn one corner of the room where poor _Tony Pig_ was confined, hung a\nlarge cage, which was the prison of a pert young magpie. As soon as my\nson _Jacky_ who was the youngest of the company, and remarkably fond of\nbirds, had saluted her by the well known appellation of _mag, poor\nmag_; she wagged her tail with surprising agility, and began to chatter\nin such an elevated tone, and with such a rapid pronunciation, that I\nwas heartily glad when the kind Bramin commanded silence. \"The body of\nthis party coloured, loquacious bird, said he, is the involuntary\nresidence of the late Miss Dorothy Chatterfast; who was a most\nnotorious little gossip, and belonged to a family which is as numerous\nas that of the _Greedyguts_. To do her justice, she was a handsome\nlittle girl, and as brisk and notable as any young miss in her\nneighbourhood. But to her own misfortune, and the unspeakable vexation\nof most persons who came within the sphere of her observation, her\nlittle tongue was as active as her hands. She learned to talk very\nearly, and so speedy was her improvement in the art of prattling, that,\nbefore she was three years old, she could lisp out a tale in very\nintelligible language. Her parents were so unwise as to encourage her\nin this mischievous kind of ingenuity, not only from the pleasure they\ntook in hearing how fast she learned to speak, but because they\nconsidered it as an infallible token that she would, in time, prove an\nexcellent wit and a notable manager. It is not, therefore, to be\nwondered at, that she took a great deal of notice of every thing which\npassed in the family, and particularly in the kitchen. If any of the\nservants accidentally broke a teacup, or saucer, a glass, &c. or\nreceived an unexpected visit from some of their acquaintance, or\nrelations, when her parents happened to be absent from home; she never\nfailed to inform them of it, the first opportunity, with many\naggravating circumstances of her own invention; for which they\ngenerally complimented her, by way of reward, with the flattering\ntitles of _a good child_, _a sweet little dear_, and _a careful little\ngirl_. By this officious impertinence she frequently got the servants\nreprimanded, and sometimes dismissed; so that by degrees they all began\nto fear and hate her. She was equally attentive to every trifle which\nhappened at the school, where she was daily sent to learn the art of\nreading, and the use of her needle; for the moment she came home, and\nbefore she had well entered the parlour door, and made her courtesy,\nher little tongue began to rattle like a mill clack.\"--\"Mamma, said\nshe, Tommy Careless was flogged for tearing his book, Jackey Fidget\nbecause he was a naughty boy and would not sit still, Polly\nGiddybrains, for losing her needle and thread paper, and, Lord bless\nme! my ma'am was so cross, that she was going to put the nasty fool's\ncap on _my_ head, only for miscalling the first word in my\nlesson.\"--\"In short she was such a notorious telltale, that she was\nsoon dignified by her school fellows with the honourable appellation of\n_Dolly Cagmag_. As she advanced in years, the habit grew upon her; and\nwhen she was old enough to be introduced into company, and go a\nvisiting, she carried on the same mischievous and despicable trade\nabroad, in which she had met with such encouragement at home. Whatever\nshe saw or heard in one place, she would be sure to report it in\nanother; so that all the masters and misses who had the mortification\nto fall into her company, considered themselves as under the malicious\ninspection of a meddlesome spy; which they had the more reason to do,\nbecause she seldom failed to embellish her informations with the\nrecital of several unfavourable circumstances of her own invention.\"\n\"Indeed, Mr. Wiseman, said Betsey, my youngest daughter, what you have\ntold us is exactly true; for I have been in company with Miss\nChatterfast several times, and I remember once in particular that when\nMaster _Sprightly_, who was a merry young spark, had stolen a kiss from\nMiss _Patty Sweetlips_, though the poor young lady blushed as red as\nscarlet, and seemed to be greatly displeased at the freedom which had\nbeen taken with her, Miss Chatterfast was so mischievous as to\nrepresent her to all her acquaintance as a bold little hussey, who\nloved to be kissed by the young gentlemen. When poor innocent Patty was\ninformed of the character which had been so unjustly fixed upon her,\nshe was ashamed to stir out of doors, and laid it so much to heart I\nthought she would have cried her eyes out.\" \"This was very unkind\nindeed, replied the good Bramin; and yet, I sincerely believe that all\nthe mischief her tongue was guilty of, was more owing to her vanity and\nthat talkative humour in which she had always been encouraged from her\ninfancy, than to any real malice in her heart. She had been long\naccustomed to speak without thinking, and naturally imagined that her\nimpertinent loquacity would be as much admired and applauded by other\npeople as by her thoughtless parents. I have the satisfaction, however,\nto observe that you are perfectly sensible of her mistake, though she\nhad not the good fortune to be so herself. If she had lived much\nlonger, it is very probable that the many slights and affronts she must\nnecessarily have met with, would have opened her eyes: For those who by\ntheir impertinent censures set the whole world at defiance, may\nreasonably expect to find an enemy in every house they enter. But her\nmeddlesome, inquisitive disposition proved to be the accidental means\nof shortening her days, before she had experience enough to correct it:\nfor, one evening, Mr. _Kindly_, a wealthy merchant, indulged all the\nyoung masters and misses in the neighbourhood with a splendid ball at\nhis own house: Miss _Chatterfast_, though she had at that time a severe\ncold upon her, was so desirous of embracing such a favourable\nopportunity of making her remarks upon the behaviour and different\ndresses of the company, and thereby furnishing herself with an ample\nstock for conversation, that she could not be prevailed upon by her too\nindulgent parents to spend the evening at home. The consequence was\nsuch as might naturally have been expected. By first over heating\nherself at the ball, and afterwards exposing herself to the night air\nin her return home, her cold, (which was bad enough before) suddenly\nincreased into a violent fever which hurried her to the grave in the\nshort space of five or six days. Though her untimely death excited the\ntransient pity of most of her acquaintance, very few of them, I\nbelieve, were really sorry to part with her. But notwithstanding that\nviolent propensity to exercise her tongue, which she too frequently\nindulged to the vexation of her neighbours, she had a large fund of\ngood nature at the bottom; so that I am in hopes that she will soon be\nrestored to the rank of human beings, and have an opportunity of\nemploying her speaking faculties with greater discretion and in a more\nagreeable manner than she did before. Her former loquacity (as I have\nalready observed) was almost entirely owing to that vanity and want of\nthought, in which she had been too much encouraged by the simple\nfondness of her parents; but the low station in which she now appears,\nwill probably teach her to be more humble and considerate, and of\nconsequence to check that talkative humour which in her past lifetime\nformed the most remarkable part of her character.\" Poor mag (who, I\nsuppose, understood every word the Bramin said) wagged her tail a\nlittle, as we left the room, but did not think proper to utter a single\nchatter.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. IV.\n\n_The Transmigration of Master_ STEPHEN CHURL _into the Body of a little\nCur._\n\n\nIn the next apartment we entered, we saw a little snarling cur, who\nimmediately saluted us with a surly grin, and barked and yelped as if\nhe would have torn the house down. He was indeed very securely chained\nto a small kennel; but my daughter Betsey happening to venture too near\nhim, he snapped at her and tore her apron. \"Take care, miss, said Mr.\nWiseman, and keep out of his reach; for though he is but a cur, he is\nvery mischievous. His body is the contemptible residence of the soul of\nthe late Master _Churl_. Poor miserable youth! he was a wrangler from\nhis infancy; and his litigious temper gave him as just a title to the\nname of _Churl_ as his birth. Even when he was a child in arms, he was\nsuch a peevish and noisy little brat, that his mamma could not find a\nwoman who would undertake the trouble of nursing him; and as soon as he\nwas able to speak and run alone, he began to wrangle with his brothers\nand sisters, upon the most trifling occasions, and seldom forgot to\nsupport his argument by exerting his little hands and heels with the\nmost malicious activity; so that to mortify his pride, and give a check\nto his ill nature, they bestowed upon him the disgraceful title of\nyoung _Kick and Cuff_. Poor Stephen, however bid defiance to all their\nridicule, and was so far from being reclaimed by it, that his\nturbulence increased in proportion to his strength and stature. He was\nafterwards as quarrelsome at school as he had been at home; and in\nevery party at taw, or trap ball, or any other innocent diversion in\nwhich he happened to be engaged, he was always remarkable for\ndisturbing the game by his frivolous disputes: Nay, when he was only a\nlooker on, he would betray his wrangling impertinent temper, by calling\nout, such a one does not play fairly; such a one counts too many; and\nsuch a one goes in before his turn. The usual reward he received for\nhis trouble was, a handsome drubbing, sometimes from his master, but\nmore frequently from his school fellows. He was equally notorious for\nhis great forwardness to give a challenge, upon the slightest\nprovocation, and very often from mere wantonness; and sometimes he\nwould very unfairly begin an engagement without giving any previous\nnotice, that he might make sure of the first blow. But his strength and\nskill being unequal to his pretensions, the many mortifying defeats he\nreceived, soon taught him the despicable cunning of assaulting none but\nthose, who, he believed, were either too weak to contend with him, or\ntoo cowardly to stand in their own defence. The speedy consequence of\nsuch a dirty conduct was, that the bigger boys despised and laughed at\nhim, and those who were less than himself, carefully shunned his\ncompany; so that at last poor wrangling Stephen, for want of\nplay-fellows, had no other diversion left for him, but to take a\nsolitary ramble through the fields. His parents being informed of the\ndisagreeable situation into which he had brought himself, and what a\nshy reception he met with from all the boys in the neighbourhood,\nthought it adviseable, after giving him a strict caution to behave in a\nmore peaceable manner for the future, to remove him to a genteel\nboarding school, at a distance from home. If he had thought proper to\nfollow their advice, and make a diligent use of the excellent\ninstructions he received from his new teachers, he might afterwards\nhave cut a shining figure in the world; but, as what is bred in the\nbone, seldom gets out of the flesh, so it fared with _Stephen Churl_.\nThough he was a little reserved at first, as being entirely among\nstrangers, a short acquaintance with them made him very familiar--the\naffability and good nature with which they listened to every thing he\nsaid, soon encouraged him to be pert; and from pertness he proceeded to\nopen rudeness and ill manners--until at last happening to be very\nmildly reprimanded by one of the young gentlemen, whose tenderness he\nmisconstrued into cowardice, he commenced hostilities, as usual, by\ngiving him an unexpected blow on the face. But his antagonist being\npossessed of as much spirit as politeness, returned the compliment in\nan instant; and conducted the engagement on his side with such vigour\nand activity, that our hero soon retired from the field of battle\nheartily drubbed, to make his complaint to the master, who, after a\nminute inquiry into all the circumstances of the fray, thought proper\nto reward him for the unnecessary trouble he had given himself, with\nthe severest flogging he had ever received in his life time. Thus\nmortified and disgraced, the unfortunate _Stephen_ resolved upon an\nelopement; but, being ashamed to return to his parents, he rambled\nthrough the fields and woods, and scrambled over hedges and ditches,\nuntil at length having torn his clothes to rags, and being almost ready\nto perish with hunger, he eagerly listed himself into a gang of\ngypsies, and supped very heartily upon the remains of a roasted cat.\nThe intolerable hardships he suffered, and the coarse fare he was\nobliged to put up with in this new situation, together with the\nfrequent bangs and thumps which he received from the younger part of\nhis strolling comrades, who were as quarrelsome and mischievous as\nhimself, but abundantly more robust, soon broke his heart; so that he\ndied in a barn, and was buried, like a beggar, at the expense of a\nlittle country parish.\" While the Bramin was concluding the history of\nMaster _Churl_, my son _Jackey_, whose temper was rather too fiery,\nlooked very sheepish; which his sister _Betsey_ observing, and easily\nguessing the cause of it, she desired him with a good natured smile,\nwhen we were leaving the room, to think on poor _Stephen_, and be sure\nto take warning.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. V.\n\n_The comical and mortifying Transmigration of little Monsieur_ FRIBBLE\n_into the Body of a Monkey._\n\n\nAfter we had taken our leave of Master _Churl_, we were conducted into\nthe apartment of Mr. _Pug_, a chattering young monkey, who, as soon as\nhe saw us whipt his little hat under his arm in a crack, and seating\nhimself upon his backside, welcomed each of us into the room by several\nceremonious nods, which were intended to supply the place of a bow, and\nwere accompanied by such a noisy affected grin, that it was impossible\nfor us to forbear laughing--\"This contemptible animal, said Mr.\n_Wiseman_, is inhabited by the little soul of the late Master _Billy\nFribble_, a young gentleman of French extraction, whose friends came\nand settled in the country about fifty years ago. His play fellows\ndignified him with the humorous title of _the little Monsieur_, not so\nmuch on account of his diminutive stature, as for that trifling and\nfinical behaviour which distinguishes the least respectable, though, by\nmany thoughtless persons, the most admired part of the French nation.\nAs neither his bodily nor mental faculties were very vigorous, his\nchildhood was remarkable only for a certain effeminate vivacity, which\ncontinually displayed itself in such a noisy and insignificant\nprattling, as was very tiresome and disagreeable to every body in the\nhouse. When he grew older, he added to his former loquacity the most\npassionate fondness for fine clothes; so that in the twelfth year of\nhis age, he became as complete a top as ever eyes beheld. He wore upon\nhis head a macaroni hat about the size of a small tea saucer; his coat,\nwhich scarcely had any skirts to it, was of the most glaring colour he\ncould fix upon; and his hair, which was plaistered over with powder and\npomatum, was tied behind in a large club, which hung swagging upon his\nshoulders like a soldier's knapsack. Thus elegantly dressed, he\nstrutted along the streets with a large stick in his hand about a foot\ntaller than himself, and a small cutteau de chasse by his side, which\nhe could handle with as much dexterity as his pen; an instrument in the\nuse of which he had made such a contemptible proficiency, that it\nrequired as much acuteness to discover the meaning of his aukward\nscrawl, as to explain the hieroglyphick characters of the ancient\nEgyptians. What still increased the obscurity of every thing which\nMonsieur _Fribble_ undertook the trouble of penning, was that,\nexcepting when he wrote his own name, he had a method of spelling which\nwas peculiar to himself. He was equally famous for his skill in the\nuseful science of numbers; for though, during the space of seven or\neight years, he devoted to it a considerable part of that lingering\ntime which he was forced to spare from his private diversions in school\nhours, the sum total of his improvement was, that he was scarcely\ncapable of casting up the contents of a shoemaker's little bill. His\nhighest ambition was, in the first place, to furnish himself with a\nlarge collection of complimentary phrases, which he had seldom\ndiscretion enough to apply with any tolerable propriety; and, in the\nnext, to complete himself in the polite art of dancing, in which he so\nfar succeeded as to be able to skip about with the most regular\nagility, though he never had a sufficient share of good sense to be\nable to dance with gracefulness. Thus accomplished, he excited the\nadmiration of every silly coquette, and the envy of every fluttering\ncoxcomb; but by all young gentlemen and ladies of understanding he was\nheartily despised as a mere civilized monkey. He performed every thing\nby imitation; and he imitated nothing (unless he was forcibly compelled\nto it) by which a rational being may be distinguished from a brute\nanimal. But the species of imitation in which he most delighted, was\nthat which, in the vulgar style, is called _mocking_; for he was not\npossessed of a sufficient stock of ingenuity to be (what he very\nfrequently attempted to be) a clever mimick. If any of his schoolmates\nhappened to be afflicted with an impediment in their speech, an\naccidental lameness, or the like; he had the mean barbarity to\nendeavour to aggravate the misfortune by a coarse imitation, which\ngenerally turned the whole ridicule upon himself. He once had the\nimpudence to practise his mockery upon a worthy gentlemen in the\nneighbourhood, who was so unfortunate as to be unable to speak without\nstuttering. The gentleman happening to pass by Mr. _Fribble's_ door, at\nwhich our little monsieur was then standing with a magpie in his hand.\"\n\"_Bi-bi-bill_, said the good man (after inquiring very civilly how he\ndid) has that pretty ma-ma-mag learned to ta-ta-talk?\" \"Ye-ye-yes,\nreplied the saucy fop, be-be-better than you do, or else I would wring\nhis head off.\" \"This rude and impertinent answer, which at first\nexcited the laughter of some of the by-standers, soon gave them a very\nmean opinion of him, and he was afterwards despised by every sensible\nperson, as a mischievous, unthinking coxcomb. What aggravated his\npunishment was, that he had so frequently indulged himself in the\nungenerous and silly practice of mocking the imperfect pronunciation of\nothers, that at last he himself contracted such a habit of stuttering\nas he could never leave off. This gave such a poor recommendation to\nthe nonsensical things he was continually saying, that he became the\nobject of ten times the ridicule which he had endeavoured to inflict\nupon those who had a _natural_ impediment. What was pitied in them as a\nmisfortune, was despised in him as an ill-acquired and consequently a\nvicious imperfection; and therefore every one was willing to increase\nthe mortifying smart of it, and keep alive the conscious shame he felt\nof wearing a fool's cap which was entirely of his own making. This\nvexatious, and in some degree, vindictive ridicule to which he was\ndaily exposed, and which, in time, he might have softened and disarmed\nby an humble and penitent deportment, gave such an insupportable wound\nto his foolish pride, that he soon absconded from company, and died of\na broken heart. That his soul might afterwards occupy such a station as\nwould be most suitable to his character, it was sentenced to inhabit\nthe body of that finical, grinning, and mischievous little mimick with\nfour legs, which you now behold before you.\" As soon as the Bramin had\nfinished his story, poor _pug_ (who seemed to retain all the little\npride of Monsieur _Fribble_) grinned, chattered, and skipped about with\na ridiculous resentment which was mingled with evident marks of fear;\nuntil at last, having agitated himself into a perfect passion, he made\na hasty spring at his keeper, which, to his own abashment, and the\nlaughter of my young companions, was as suddenly checked by a small\nchain that secured him to the floor.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. VI.\n\n_The dismal Transmigration of Master_ TOMMY FILCH _into the Body of a\nWolf._\n\n\nAs soon as we had lifted up the latch to enter into the next apartment,\nwe were immediately alarmed by a horrid howling; which upon opening the\ndoor we discovered to be the savage musick of a lusty young wolf, who\nlooked as fierce as if he would have torn every one of us to pieces.\nBut a strong chain confined his fury to one corner of the room; so that\nwe could venture pretty near him without any danger of feeling the\nstrength of his jaws. \"This plundering and voracious animal, said the\nBramin, who has been accustomed to gratify his appetite at the expense\nof all the farmers in the neighbourhood, is inhabited by the soul of\nthe late Master _Filch_, who, as you will find by the sequel of the\nstory, is now placed in a station which is perfectly suitable to his\ncharacter. His very infancy was disgraced by a natural propensity to\nfraud and rapine; for as soon as he could talk plain enough to be\nunderstood, the chief employment of his tongue was to tell as many\nstories as his little head was capable of inventing; and that his hands\nmight come in for their share of mischief, he never failed to make a\nproperty of all the sugar, fruit, tarts, &c. which the carelessness of\nthe servants had left within his reach. If his parents had been wise\nenough to chastise him for his little roguery, they might have nipped\nit in the bud; but they were so imprudently fond, that they not only\nneglected to administer the discipline of the rod, but made his\nfalsehood and pilferings the constant subject of their merriment. They\nconsidered his faults as trivial, because they were the faults of a\nchild; not reflecting that if the seeds of vice are suffered to grow,\nthey will in a shorter time than is commonly imagined, take such deep\nroot in the heart, that it will be scarcely possible to eradicate them.\nExperience, however, soon undeceived them; for when little _Filch_ was\neight or nine years old, though he had plenty of fruit at home, they\nhad the mortification to be informed that he was making daily\nincursions into every poor man's garden in the neighbourhood. The\nconsequence of these repeated complaints was sometimes a severe\nreprimand, and sometimes as severe a flogging; but neither the one nor\nthe other were able to produce a reformation, though it is very\nprobable, that if they had been applied in time, they might have been\napplied to better purpose. From robbing orchards he soon proceeded to\nthe raising private contributions on his school fellows. Sometimes he\ndefrauded them at play: sometimes he picked their pockets; and very\nfrequently he stole their books, or money, out of their desks and\nboxes: and, as it is the study of every wicked boy to maintain the\nappearance of honesty as long as he is able, as soon as the robbery was\ndiscovered he was the first person to exclaim against it, which he did\nin the bitterest terms, and to prevent a long and circumstantial\ninquiry after the author of it (which he suspected would not terminate\nin his favour) he impudently pretended to have been an eye witness of\nthe fact, and then boldly charged it upon one or another of his school\nmates, who he knew had neither skill nor spirit enough to contradict\nhis evidence in a satisfactory manner. By this means the bashful\ninnocent was frequently punished instead of the guilty. But as bad boys\nare seldom able to conceal their faults long from the eye of justice,\nyoung _Filch_ was soon detected in his wickedness, and being considered\nas a dangerous person, whose bad example might have a pernicious effect\nupon his play fellows, he was first corrected with all the severity he\ndeserved, and then sent home to his parents. In this disgraceful manner\nhe was dismissed from every school in the country, 'till at last,\nthough he was only thirteen years old, there was not a single academy\ninto which he could be admitted upon any terms whatever. But this was\nnot the worst effect of the ill character he had acquired: for as no\none is willing to introduce a lad of bad reputation into his house,\nthere was not a tradesman of any credit to be found who would venture\nto take him as an apprentice, though a large premium was offered for\nthat purpose. His parents, therefore, were under the disagreeable\nnecessity of keeping him at home; but having little or nothing for him\nto do, he soon fell into bad company, who in as short a time gave him a\nperfect relish for the scandalous and expensive amusement of gaming and\ntippling. His finances, though sufficiently plentiful for a youth of\nhis age, were by these destructive means so much encumbered with little\ndebts, that to maintain a worthless credit among his worthless\ncompanions, he formed the wicked resolution of taking money from his\nfather and mother without their knowledge. The success of his first\nattempt (in which he was not discovered, because he was not suspected\nto be capable of so much baseness) encouraged him to a second; and the\nsuccess of his second attempt encouraged him to greater extravagances\nand more expensive risk than he had ventured upon before. But his\nwickedness, which in the former instances had been wrongfully charged\nupon the servants of the family, being at last detected, and his\nparents taking him very severely to task on account of such an\nabandoned and depraved conduct, he left them in a fit of anger and\nremorse, and became a thoughtless and unhappy wanderer; in this\nsituation falling one evening into a company whose mirth and gaiety\ngreatly delighted him, and whose genteel appearance led him to suppose\nthey were gentlemen, though in reality they were no other than\nhighwaymen, he was prevailed on in an unguarded moment, when heated\nwith liquor, to make an incursion with this infamous banditti, and\nactually stopped a gentleman and demanded his money; fortunately,\nhowever for this unhappy youth, the gentleman was an old school fellow,\nand making himself known to him, with much intreaty prevailed on him\nimmediately to leave the company of those desperate adventurers, and\ntotally to abandon a mode of life so shockingly wicked in itself, and\nso dreadfully fatal in its consequences.\n\n\"But from the idle and dissipated manner in which he had spent his\ntime, he had contracted an unconquerable habit of indolence, and a\nrooted aversion to business; in this frame of mind, the army became his\nlast resource, into which he entered as a common soldier, but after a\nshort time his itch for pilfering returning, he could not refrain from\nmaking free with some money with which he was intrusted by his officer;\nbeing detected, he was punished with that rigorous severity with which\nthefts in the army usually are, and being afterwards thrown into the\nSavoy prison, to prevent a repetition of his crime, he died there in a\nfew days of his wounds in the utmost misery. When the Bramin had\nfinished this melancholy tale, the poor wolf, as if he was conscious\nhow nearly it concerned him, heightened the horrour with which it had\nfilled us by such a mournful and terrifying howl, as made us heartily\nglad to quit the room.\"\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. VII.\n\n_Of the wonderful Transmigration of Master_ RICHARD RUSTICK _into the\nBody of a Bear._\n\n\nIn the next apartment into which Mr. _Wiseman_ conducted us, we saw the\ncub of a bear, who lay upon the floor to which he was chained, without\nhaving the good manners to rise when we entered; but when the Bramin\napplied his wand to young Bruin's buttocks, he heaved up his shaggy\nhide with a kind of lazy resentment, and saluted us with a reluctant\ngrin and a savage growl, which plainly intimated that he did not think\nhimself much beholden to us for our company. \"This young brute, said\nour conductor, is animated by the soul of the late matter _Rustick_, of\nclownish memory. His father was a gentleman of rank and fortune, and\ngreatly beloved and respected by all his acquaintance; and if his son\nRichard had possessed the same virtues and accomplishments, he might\nafterwards have enjoyed his title and estate with equal comfort and\nreputation. But as merit does not go by inheritance, like house and\nland, young _Rustick's_ character was entirely the reverse of his\nfather's. He was of an awkward clumsy make; and the heaviness of his\ndisposition, and the coarseness of his manners perfectly corresponded\nwith the shape of his body. Though he was sent to school very early,\nand put under the care of the best instructors which the country\nafforded, he was a considerable time before he could tell his letters,\nand much longer before he could read with tolerable accuracy: and even\nthen he pronounced every thing with such a clownish accent and such a\ndrawling tone, that any stranger would have taken him for a young\ncountry bumkin, who had been used to follow the plow tail, and not for\nthe son and heir of a wealthy gentleman. He was equally eminent for his\nneatness and dexterity in the art of penmanship; for, even when he was\ntwelve years old, if you had seen the letter which he then sent to his\nmamma without the knowledge of his master, it was wrote so crooked\n(i.e. not from side to side as it ought to have been, but from corner\nto corner) and the strokes were all so coarse and uneven, and the whole\nof the letter so awkwardly spelt, and so unmercifully blotted and\nbedawbed, that you would have thought it had been the elegant epistle\nof _Tony Clodhopper_ to his grandmother _Goody Linsey Woolsey_. As for\nhis mamma, poor gentlewoman! when she first opened it, she thought it\nhad been sent to her by some impudent shoe black or chimney sweeper;\nbut when she had directed her eyes to the bottom and read (though not,\nI assure you, without the greatest difficulty)--\"_from yr, loven ind\nrespactfle sun, Rickard Rostick_\" she was so much oppressed with shame\nand vexation, that she tore the letter into a thousand pieces, and was\nready to burst into tears. He was alike remarkable for the politeness\nof his manners, and his agreeable address; for he had such a\ntreacherous memory, though he had been frequently reminded of the\npropriety and indeed the necessity of observing those little punctilios\nof good behaviour, that he seldom remembered when any company entered\nthe room in which he happened to be sitting, either to rise from his\nchair or take off his hat; and when he was told of it either by his\nparents or his master, he would bounce up, and snatch of his hat in\nsuch an awkward hurry, grinning and leering the whole time, that you\nwould have thought he had just started from a dream; and even then he\nwould generally forget to finish the rude ceremony by making one of his\nducking bows. It is true, indeed, he had been under the hands of a\ndancing master; but notwithstanding the utmost care and assiduity of\nhis teacher, who was esteemed a very excellent one; he was never able\nto perform a whit better than he does in his present shape. In short,\nyou might as well have kept a hog in training for Newmarket races, or\nan ox for his majesty to ride upon at a grand review, as have attempted\nto initiate master _Dicky Rustick_ in the elements of politeness and\ngood breeding. With such a delicate disposition, and such amiable\ntalents, you will readily perceive that he must have been a most\nagreeable play fellow. His favorite diversion was that which has been\ndistinguished by the vulgar, by the well known name of _Pully Hawly_,\nin which he so much excelled that whenever he was invited by the young\ngentlemen and ladies in the neighbourhood to play with them, he\ngenerally rewarded their civility by tearing their coats or pulling\ntheir clothes off their backs before he returned home; so that at last\nthey bestowed upon him, by general consent, the honourable title of\n_'Squire Bruin_. It must, however, be acknowledged that he was a youth\nof such impartial justice, that he shewed as little favour to his own\nclothes as to those of _other_ people; for what with climbing up old\ntrees, and rambling over hedges and ditches, to seek for birds nests,\nhe commonly appeared by dinner time, how well soever he had been\ndressed in the morning, in as ragged a coat as he wears at present. It\nmust also be remarked, that if the young gentlemen and ladies soon grew\nweary, as indeed they did, of such a rough play fellow, he, in _his_\nturn, was as willing to leave _their_ company, as they were to be rid\nof _his_; for his chief delight was to associate with such vulgar boys\nand girls as were of the same rugged disposition as himself. With these\nhe could pull and hawl and romp and tear as long as he pleased; and the\nmore active he became in this raggamuffin species of diversion, the\nmore they relished his company. But, upon occasion, he could fight as\nwell as play: I mean when he either was provoked to it by his equals,\nor tempted to it by the hopes of defrauding of their little property\nthose who he knew had neither strength enough nor courage to resist\nhim. But whatever was his motive either for _beginning_ or suffering\nhimself to be _drawn_ into an engagement, he was very far from\nconfining himself to any rules of honour, or to the established laws of\nwar; for instead of boxing fairly, he would kick, pull hair, bite, and\nscratch most unmercifully, and never fail to take every advantage of\nhis antagonist after he had brought him to the ground. For these\nreasons he was soon dignified with the nick name of _Dick Bear_, even\nby the vulgar boys in the streets; and most of them afterwards took\ncare never to engage with him unless when there were several other boys\npresent to see fair play. One would think that such a rough hewn and\nslovenly mortal as we have been describing would have had little regard\nfor any delicacies in the eating way. But whoever draws such a\nconclusion in favour of our hero, _Dicky Rustick_, is greatly mistaken;\nfor I can assure you that he had as nice and dainty a tooth as any lady\nin the land. Though his father always kept a handsome table, it\nafforded scarcely any thing which was good enough for the palate of\nMaster _Richard_. Nothing would go down with him but tarts, custards,\nand the most costly cakes and puddings; for as to good roast and boiled\nmeat and plain and wholesome pies or dumplings, he would turn up his\nnose at them as if they were fit only for vagabonds and beggars. Nay,\neven to this very hour, and in his present clumsy shape, he is almost\nas dainty as ever; for he is remarkably fond of honey, and if permitted\nwould often expose his shaggy head and his eyes to the resentment of\nthe bees, by disturbing their hives to rob them of their delicious\nstore. It was his fondness for niceties of every kind which shortened\nhis days, and eased his parents of their apprehensions for a son who,\nif he had lived, would have been a continual plague and disgrace to\nthem; for on the day when he entered into the fourteenth year of his\nage, being indulged rather more than common, he devoured such a\nquantity of the richest tarts, that his stomach could not digest them;\nso that he soon fell into a violent fever, which in a few days hurried\nhis unworthy soul out of the body of a young country 'squire (for such\nhe would have been) into the carcass of this hairy and awkward young\nmonster which now stands before you. He so well understands what I have\nbeen saying, and is so much vexed at the character I have given of him,\nwhich he knows to be a very just one, that if you will promise to quit\nthe room and leave him to himself he will pleasure you with one of his\nbest dances before you go.\"--Accordingly after thanking the Bramin for\nthe account he had given us, we all promised to leave Mr. _Bruin_ to\nhis own meditation; upon which, after taking two or three sulkey\nrounds, the young savage reared himself upon his buttocks, and shuffled\na saraband which lasted a few minutes. When he had finished his dance\nhe swaggered down again upon his fore paws, and by a sullen growl\nseemed to claim the performance of our promise, an indulgence which we\nvery readily granted him.\n\n\n\n\nCHAP. VIII.\n\n_Of the astonishing Transmigration of Miss_ ABIGAIL EVILTONGUE _into\nthe Body of a Serpent._\n\n\nIn the next apartment we saw a large wire cage, in which the Bramin\ntold us he had a bird which was something different from the common\nones; and so indeed it was, for upon my eldest daughter's going near to\nsee it, she was startled by a large serpent which darted itself against\nthe wires, and hissed and sissed as if it would have stung us all to\ndeath in an instant. It was however, a very beautiful creature of the\nkind, and as the sun then shone very bright, the golden and silver\nstreaks upon its azure skin made a very splendid appearance. My\nyoungest son wanting to go and stroke it;--\"No, my pretty boy, said the\ngood Bramin; if you have any value for yourself, you will always keep\nout of the reach of such creatures as these, and of all such who\nresemble the young lady by whose soul this serpent is animated. I say\n_young lady_, because the serpent before you is indeed animated by the\nsoul of the late Miss _Abigail Eviltongue_. The family of the\n_Eviltongue_, (I dare say you have heard of them) is extremely\nnumerous; for there are some, and indeed too many of them, in every\ntown, and, I believe in every village in the country. Miss _Abigail_,\nthe young lady I am speaking of, had as just a title to the name, and\nsupported the character of her family with as much exactness as any one\namongst them; for her tongue was remarkably active, and spared the\nreputation neither of friend nor foe. She was, it is true, a very\nhandsome girl, and the charms of her person would have procured her\nmany admirers if they had not been disgraced by her natural propensity\nto slander and defamation. In her very infancy, as soon as she could\nspeak to be understood, she began with telling fibs of the servants,\nand very frequently of her brothers and sisters; for which, you may be\ncertain, they all despised her very heartily. But as she was too much\nencouraged in this hateful practice by her parents, instead of being\nseverely flogged for it, as she ought to have been, she set the frowns\nand sneers of the others at open defiance; and the more they resented\nher little malice the more eager she was to gratify it by loading them\nwith all the falsehoods she was capable of inventing. In proportion as\nshe grew older, this mischievous habit increased upon her; and when she\nwas big enough to go a visiting, she indulged it abroad with as much\nfreedom as she had been used to do at home; so that, in a short time,\nthere was scarcely a young miss or master in the neighbourhood whose\ncharacter she had not attempted to injure. What made her slanders the\nmore odious was, that she generally vented them under a pretence of the\ngreatest friendship and respect for the persons to whom she related\nthem, and with great seeming pity for those whose reputation they were\nintended to destroy. She had likewise the malicious cunning to say many\ntrifling things in praise of the objects of her censure; that by thus\nassuming an appearance of the strictest impartiality, and of the\nsincerest good nature, she might more easily gain credit to the bad\nthings she said afterwards. By such artifices as these she frequently\nsucceeded with the innocent and the unwary, and set one acquaintance\nand even one friend against another, without any sort of advantage to\nherself but the mere pleasure of making mischief. Another trick which\nshe often employed for that purpose, was to examine into a young\ngentleman or lady's constitutional foibles (for we all have some) and\nwhen she had discovered these, to go immediately to the person and tell\nhim or her, that master or miss _such a one_ had publickly ridiculed\nhim for those very failings; by these means she was almost certain to\nbe believed without any farther inquiry; for every one, even upon the\nslightest hint, will readily suspect that those things have been said\nof him, which he most wishes to be concealed, because he is conscious\nthey are _really_ true; he will seldom trouble himself to inquire into\nthe veracity of the tale bearer, lest he should be reduced to the\nnecessity of defending himself on his weakest side. For a similar\nreason, when Miss _Abigail_ had a mind to flatter any person (which she\nfrequently would, to answer the purposes of her malice) she always\ncommended him for those particular good qualities, or accomplishments\nwhich she knew he most valued himself for, or chiefly wished to have\nthe credit of; because she was sensible that by this method she\neffectually retained his own vanity as her advocate for whatever she\nsaid afterwards. Nay, I have been informed by one who knew her\nperfectly well, that, young as she was, she sometimes carried her\nartifice so far as to begin a dispute with the person she intended to\ndeceive, and after a little sharp altercation _pro and con_ to flatter\nhis vanity by gradually giving up the argument, and at last yielding\nhim a victory, which gave him the more pleasure, because he thought it\nto be entirely owing to the invincible strength of his judgment. But\nshe had another fault, which, if possible, was still more odious, than\nany of those already mentioned--viz. to revile and backbite those from\nwhom she had received the greatest favours; for as she was too proud to\nown herself to be under obligations to any person, so to prevent others\nfrom taking notice of them, as she imagined to her disadvantage, she\nwould represent every obligation she had received from her friends to\nbe either of the most trifling consequence, or to have been bestowed\nfrom selfish and despicable motives. Such was the temper and behaviour\nof Miss _Abigail_, who was a wretched complication of malice, low\ncunning and ingratitude: It is therefore no wonder that every person of\nsense and character was careful to avoid her company, and that she was\ndetested by many, and despised even by those who wished her well. In\nshort, the general contempt to which she had exposed herself, and the\nsevere mortifications she met with from time to time, gave such killing\nwounds to her pride, that after pining and wasting away with shame and\nvexation for the space of several months, she at last broke her heart\nand gave up the ghost, in the seventeenth year of her age. After her\ndeath her contemptible soul was immediately hurried into the body of\nthis venomous serpent, where it still retains its former malice and\ncunning.\"--When the Bramin had finished his story, the serpent, as if\nshe understood and resented what had been said, writhed about and\nhissed at him as if she could have stung his eyes out.\n\nWe afterwards visited several other apartments, and saw a young tyger,\na fox, a badger, &c. each of which was animated by the soul of some\nnaughty child, who very nearly resembled him in temper. But as I have\nperhaps, already carried my treatise to such a length as will tire the\neyes and the patience of my little readers, it is proper to bring it to\na conclusion. I will, therefore, take my leave of them for the present,\nwith observing that in one of the rooms we visited, we saw a pretty\nlittle parrot, in a gilt cage, who was perpetually talking, but did not\nunderstand the meaning of one single word he said. \"This noisy bird,\nsaid the good Bramin, is inhabited by the soul of the late master\n_Gabble_, who was remarkable for two faults. He always spoke without\nthinking, and read a great deal with so little attention, that he made\nno farther improvement in knowledge than if he had never read at all.\nHe devoured every thing, but digested nothing.\" If any of my readers\nhappen to be of the same disposition, they may survey the gilt covers\nof this little treatise with as much advantage as they will peruse the\ncontents of it.\n\n\nFINIS.","title":"Vice in its Proper Shape: Or, The Wonderful and Melancholy Transformation of Several; Naughty Masters and Misses Into Those Contemptible Animals; Which They Most Resemble In Disposition.","tradition":"myth-cosmogony","translated_text":null,"word_count":11645}